Okay....need your opinions again...very long

PMSL!! Well,,,,it was well worth a try wasn't it?

Hmmm, I am afraid you are going to have to keep battling with yourself over this one.

I think you may keep him though.
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Forget about the business woman for a while!
Remember, he already has a fabulous home with lovely people who love him! I know you said your friend wasn't making it uncomfortable for you but I also don't think she's been very fair either - he's your horse, your OWN horse, and after you said 'no' that should have been an end to it! I can understand you wanting to find her a fab horse and there will be one out there for her but should that be at your expense?!
Can I ask you a question? I know you said you have other horses who can fill his shoes work-wise but do you have one that can fill his place in your heart? Would you miss him?
(yes I know that's 2 questions!)
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I havben't read all the zillions of replies to your post - but I would say - gut feel? Keep him.

If he is your horse and you have a strong attachment to him then keep him.

So what if you have other horses up and coming, or you could train others to do the same job - he is your horse and you obviously think a great deal of him. Keep him and tell her you will look out for something else for her. Ask her to stop asking you to sell him - if she had not mentioned it so much you wouldn't be in this dilemma.

Keep him!
 
This is heartbreaking to read - you must feel terrible - big hugs!
There is nothing wrong with you - you love your horse, end of! There's nothing wrong with that!
It's very commendable of you to put your own feelings second and take the view that by selling him you'll make way for another horse - you can still find that horse and give him a perfect home, by finding him for your friend and letting her love and care for him!
I don't know you very well but you sound like a thoroughly nice person who has given a lovely home to lots of horses - don't feel bad for wanting to keep just one for yourself, you deserve at least that!
 
Kirsty; I have thought about that too. It's just that her daughter who is in the same class as my daughter was hoping to do some cattle work with my daughter ..... and as mine has my other horse to do this on, I thought it would be nice for their daughter (who could do with a bit of help at this moment in time) to have my other good stable horse for her to learn on. If I sell after the season has ended then their daughter would have not had the joy of it all; because I know how protective I am of Oscar I would never consider having her ride him in these events when I am his owner. Sounds absolutely awful I know
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but I know my own mind and I just wouldn't allow it.

Teapot; blonde usually means very light coloured but it can have some red in it, whereas flaxen generally doesn't have any red/chestnut.
 
Tia I really do feel for you- we are a very divided forum today!
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Part of me feels like the joy he offers you and this immense bond you have could be what your neighbour feels as well and perhaps he really is the one for her- especially as she feels this strongly when she's never ridden him. I really feel that this home for him is too good to pass on and he's still within touching distance from you (so to speak).

but this irrational mad woman whose heart is speaking loudly really seems to want to keep this special boy
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so I'm no help at all really ! sorry
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Keep him. The fact that you have posted this tells me all I need to know - you're not ready for him to go yet, He really is a super little horse, and I certainly wouldn't sell him right now.

Maybe see how the summer goes - you need good lead horses, and it only takes something to happen to one, and you are down to one solid lead horse - and that is too much for them on your busy days, they like their laid back life! I think he will be fab to take out penning, and I think you will be happier with M on him than some of the others.

I think you were spot on to sell Zip when you did, but I do think Oscar has a while longer in him yet - I would lay this out to your neighbour, explain he is more than a working horse to you, and you would appreciate her not mentioning it any more, but that you will of course give her first refusal IF you decide to sell him in future.

Now I am going to read what everyone else has said - thought I would write my opinion before I get swayed by others!
 
Oh you know what I think, you should keep him.

Especially if you're considering stopping the trail riding. You and Megan would have the opportunity to enjoy riding out more together, going to shows etc. You've already said how Megan has a soft spot for him and he's one of the few you talk about with real affection. I don't believe you when you say you don't get sentimental! Oscar, Ezzy and Cloud. They're all special equines in your life.

Seriously, I have a feeling you'll regret selling him if you do.
 
Jags I understand exactly what you are saying.

Before I moved to Canada I still bought and sold.....however only ever ponies. My horses remained with me for life and the only horses I have ever sold were the 2 I sold immediately prior to leaving for Canada. One I bred, and had owned for the whole of his 13 years - he was a complete idiot but he was my horse and I wouldn't have sold him had I remained in England.

The other horse was one of the most lovely horses I have had the pleasure of owning. He was a beautiful and very very honest buckskin. He was the one who brought me back into horses again. I was about to give them up as my old SJ mare had died a couple of years previously....my homebred had turned into the stupidist Anglo-arab to ever dawn on this planet and although I would never have sold him I was aware that my feelings for riding were close on being far less than they had been in all of my other years in this world. The buckskin was the one who single-handedly inspired me, excited me, thrilled me back into horse riding again. I sold him to a lovely lady, I was happy to see him go to her, I delivered him to his beautiful new home and adoring owner and happily said goodbye.....then on the M3 on the way home I burst into tears!

You see when I claim them as mine.....I just don't sell. They stay with me for life.....except in this case they didn't.
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I miss him - am I doing this with Oscar because I miss my buckskin?

Sorry.....I am starting to wander off the subject here. I really really do appreciate you all for your suggestions and advice and trying to help me here. Crumbs I am even bleating my heart out about a horse I sold 3 years ago. I must be falling apart....on an Open forum aswell....jeez
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definitely keep him, its not really about whether you can replace him with another horse that can do his job, he is your horse and he has a special place in your heart which another cannot just fill.
 
Ok - now you have explained about your business plans, it is much easier! Keep this one - he is YOUR horse and you need to have your own horse for fun. He sounds like an absolute delight. Your business head should be thinking - successful business - bonus - keep horse. It is SO easy - I can't understand how you are having a problem with it!
 
So with your new venture, are you planning on selling some horses anyway? I'm guessing Ezzy and Cloud and baybe are totally ringfenced and never going anywhere!!!

If you are not going to do trail rides - what will Oscar be doing? Will you be keeping him as your own trail horse for you riding with Megan rather than talking out paying riders? Will Megan spend plenty of time working him?

If you still have a use for him when you go onto your new business venture, then keep him. Some horses Tia, are just a once in a lifetime chance and you hang on to them. You know I have a weakness for chestnuts, and QH in particular - I say in those circumstances keep him.

However, if you will be busy with the new venture and he won't get the time and work he deserves, then let him go to the good home they will give him, with plenty to keep him occupied.

J x
 
If you have put him in the "mine" category then keep him! He sounds great and why bother looking for replacements or training a youngster when you already have your ideal trail horse?
You don't need to sell him so enjoy him. My horse is a complete pain in the backside but even then i wouldn't sell her, if she was as perfect as Oscar i would probably lock her up and not let anyone see her!!
Don't let him go if you know you will regret it everytime your neighbour rides by on him!
 
Yes I would miss him. He is my trusty boy; I can do absolutely anything with him; he's smart, he's a quick learner, he is exceptionally well behaved, anyone can ride him and he takes care of his rider. I have taken him into situations as a 2 year old (when had he been in England he wouldn't even have been backed at this age) and he hasn't batted an eyelid. He is confident, he is self-assured; he is just quite simply, wonderful.

An interesting thing happened just yesterday; I know that Oscar very very much likes being with me....and I him.....however just yesterday I was standing at the fence of his field and he was with all of his friends munching quite happily on the hay. I didn't call him and I was very quiet just standing there. He looked over and saw me standing there and almost immediately left his friends and came straight over to me. I still didn't say anything but raised my hand to gently touch his face, he brought his muzzle down to my mouth for a kiss, I kissed him and he then walked forward and placed the whole weight of his head and neck across my shoulder and laid his head on my back. I gently fondled his mane. Nothing was said and it remained like this for a good 20 minutes. I broke the contact as my husband called over to me to help him; so I kissed Oscar and went over to help my husband.

This all happened at the wrong time....just when I was coming round to the idea of selling him.
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Awwww, what a lovely bond you must have! Please don't sell him!!!!! I really, really think you'll regret it terribly and I think by the sounds of it he wouldn't want to be anywhere but with you!
If I were in this situation I would tell my friend that I had no intention of selling him but if that ever changed I would most certainly give her 1st refusal (as someone else said).
Chin up, go with your heart and I'm sure everytime you ride him you'll know you made the right decision!
 
OMG Tia, I am crying.

DO NOT SELL HIM!!!

There is no reason for you to sell him. I know it's your business, but you love him, you don't need the money. Keep him and enjoy him, and then let your daughter enjoy him after you. If this friend had not kept on at you, you would never have entertained the idea of selling him. I know you say she would give him an amazing home for life, but what if she didn't? What if she sold him? Stranger things have happened and you would regret ever letting him go.

I know this is hard for you, and I am going to have to make this decision too in a few weeks time. If there weren't an ocean between us, I wouldn't sell Harv either.
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Right Tia, that did it- Keep him! You've got me welling up now about this one- the image of you two stood bonding together. I was totally on the selling track but now i'm on the keep him team
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LOL!! Louise.....no PMT either to blame this on. I have just lost the plot I think.
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FMM; you are doing a good job; I AM listening to you.

Patches and GM; isn't this the problem though? Cloud will never be leaving this farm, neither will Ezzy and neither will their baby. Neither will Trixie, neither will Jessie, neither will the 2 oldies Red and Kate.......don't I have too many to indulge in Oscar aswell? I don't want to sell Golden either.....the rest? Yes to the right homes no problem.

GM; He will be doing team penning, he will trail ride with us as a family, he will be available for friends and family to ride - he would be a fabulous prospect for Megan to barrel race or show if she wanted to. She wants a horse for the Fair this year, he would be perfect. I use him as my mail horse - I ride him in his headcollar down to the mail box, I use him to ride to the top of the hill to catch other horses I need, I use him to lead out youngsters on a line for their first few times out on the trails. I LOVE to teach him things as he is so smart and is totally in tune with me. He's everything I would ever want from a horse - he's quiet and he's also very fast if the desire takes you to bomb along! He has a jog (very slow trot) to die for.....he has it all. BUT....don't I have too many stragglers??

Emma - thank you. I know you like Oscar (well maybe not as much as you liked the big Spotty Horse; sorry for selling him but his new owner says you are more than welcome to still ride him when you come up
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Sometimes I have to pinch myself when I remember that he is only going to be 4 years old in a couple of months time.

So you all think I have decided....that I am going to keep him......what if I tell you that I am having a huge arena built? It will be 85metres X 75metres and it is going to cost a small fortune (to me anyway). We have also taken on more land and husband has just returned to say he bought both the round baler and the hay inverter. I want an extension to the house and I still haven't done anything with my kitchen. I am looking at about 10K to fence this latest field in the fencing that I want for the babies. My husband wants his triple car garage so he can rebuild his '67 Camaro ..... now obviously this money for Oscar is piddly peanuts compared to what we are planning to do.....however it would go towards the cost of everything.

Oscar will never be more valuable than he is at this moment in time; he's a rising 4 year old with his whole life ahead of him and he has been offered one of the best homes I could imagine for him.......but...

Sorry, I am waffling again. I think I am doing all of this writing to help me actually. Trying to figure it out and just talking aloud really.
 
You are me.....you are talking through normal Tia's mouth.....that's exactly what I would have said to you if you were asking this question Weezy.
 
Right, he'll be on the first plane over there in September/October
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Wish we had somewhere around here that offered that. I am not 100% sure what my plans are for weaning just yet
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If your friend hadn't mentioned buying him then you'd not have even considered selling him and you'd still have gone ahead and done everything you're planning so forget about how the money would go towards the cost of it all etc.!
Think you're making the right decision to keep him - and look at it this way, if your friend wants him as much as she says then if you decide in 6mths/a year/2 years/whenever that you can part with him she'll still be there to offer him a great home. If she doesn't want him then, then perhaps you've had a lucky escape as she may have sold him on if you had given in and sold right now?! Hope that makes sense!
 
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You are me.....you are talking through normal Tia's mouth.....that's exactly what I would have said to you if you were asking this question Weezy.

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Yep. Sometimes you have to part with things to ensure growth in the BIG PICTURE.
 
LOL!! thank you for your posts Becki. You've made me smile again.
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I think my husband would like me to sell Oscar.....he has always said that it is my decision, but yesterday he said we need to sell someone and since neighbour wants Oscar then it is perfect he says.
 
Nooooooooo!!!!!!! Don't sell him to pay for fencing! My Sister sold the love of her life to pay for kitchen appliances and she's regretted it ever since!
 
But she wouldn't ever sell him. I know she wouldn't. She has 150 acres and only 3 horses. They are loaded, they want for nothing AND she adores her horses. She would never ever sell an animal as they are very much a part of their lives and family.
 
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