Once its sold.........its SOLD!

Echo Bravo said:
Donnie Darco it isn't a bitch thread, she stated her opinion and I agree with her, when you sell an animal , you have no longer have any say what the new owner wants to with said animal, otherwise why sell said animal?
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This. It's nice if the old owner contacts and the new owner is more than happy to communicate but frankly whatever the reasons, once the horse is sold it is the new owners and the sellers have taken money for it, and there is no moral obligation on the buyer (who if they agreed to update may have felt pressured to as they wanted to buy the horse, not false pretences but being polite) to do any updating or keep in communication unless they want to.

If you want lifetime tracking of your horse, don't take the money to sell it, put it on loan.

The reason for selling however unfortunate is nothing to do with the buyer and doesn't entitle the seller to somehow keep some kind of ownership over the horse where the owner has to update them or let them visit etc. nice if they are happy to, but bear in mind for some new owners it makes them feel as if their horse is not really fully theirs.

OPs view was perfectly reasonable IMO.
 
Not read all replies but I have no problem with my boys old owner contacting me. We are friends on Facebook and she likes my photos but also doesn't "stalk me for information" maybe because she knows I like to update her so she doesn't need to.

I have never sold a horse but know it would be so so hard not to know anything. I think most owners would be very pleased to hear updates but again know it's not obligatory for the new owners to do so.

A hard topic I think with very different views, especially depending on which side you're on
 
Echo Bravo said:
Patterdale, Neither Stormox or anyone of us realised that MrsD123 had a mental health problem until someone mentioned it, so climb down off your high horse!
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Me neither, but you didn't need to be a genius to see that she was upset onthe other thread.

However, not being privy to each posters health records, I try to just be non-judgemental and fair to everyone, not start threads as a thinly veiled dig at others, and importantly to always try to remember that there's a real person on the end of each username.
I may not always get it right, but I always try - rather than judging first then back pedalling later.

So I think I'll stay on my moral high ground actually, this time :)
 
Ah well, perhaps Carl Hester shouldn't have kept an eye out for Escapado and taken him back for retirement then. After all, he did sell him.....

Don't recall anyone thinking that was weird.
 
Horserider High profiled horse, I still remember Harvey Smith's ex showjumpers ending up in meat market he wasn't worried as he'd sold them on, just the press that made a fuss.
 
horserider said:
Ah well, perhaps Carl Hester shouldn't have kept an eye out for Escapado and taken him back for retirement then. After all, he did sell him.....

Don't recall anyone thinking that was weird.
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Some breeders have their stock registered with the associations whereby we will take back our stock should they ever run into any hardship. Mine are all registered. It's part and parcel of being a breeder, in that you will forever be responsible for an animal that you brought into this life. Shame so many others don't view this as the right thing to do.
 
Haven't read any replies but in the main I agree with the OP.

Saying that, as a breeder it's always interesting to know how my 'children' are getting on and to this, I always write in the passport that I'd welcome any news if the horse is ever sold on and it usually works; new owners do get in touch and it's always great to hear about them. However if I sell anything I didn't breed, once it's gone, it's gone although any buyers are always told I'd love updates but it's very much up to them and I won't lose any sleep if they don't, after all, I wouldn't have sold the horse if I still wanted it and I wouldn't dream of 'stalking them' as some on here seem to think is acceptable, that is very unfair on the new owners and shows a lot of immaturity on the seller's part. Even if it's a sale that is forced on them due to circumstances that does not give them the right to make new owners' lives a misery; you didn't have to sell to that particular person, you could have picked someone else. It really is a case of you've made your bed, now lie on it, you have nobody to blame but yourself for selling to that person.
 
This is typical attention seeking behaviour on a forum. I am a member of several mental health forums, and have never seen such a flustered reaction to an "odd" poster. This is a public open forum - you have to accept that there may be people who are genuine, and those that are not. You CANNOT help everybody. You have to take things for what they are, and let go.
 
I am more compassionate than most because of my illness, but even I have learnt that you cannot save the world. Or should even want to. YOU are the most important person in the world, take care of yourself first, others second. xx
 
I'm with OP on this one - it really strikes me as weird that some threads on this forum are from people who "expect" the new owners to keep them informed. That would totally weird me out - you sold the horse. If we happen to run into each other, then yup, fine we can catch up. But if you are expecting monthly updates, or any input into what I do with the horse, then forget it.

I bought one of my horses as a weanling from a friend, who bred him. She had an opinion about everything I did with him. The friendship sort of fell apart when she vented her opinion on my decision to take him BF. Still have the horse (FEI3* 160 km qualified BF), don't miss the friend.
 
What an odd thread. I keep in contact with my mares breeder and in fact she has gone back there for some recuperation after an accident. Most people like talking about their horses so have no problem updating old owners. Yes it would be weird if they turned up and expected to ride and tell you what to do but that is a completely different issue and i'm sure pretty rare! I've kept in contact with the people who bought my NF who I sold because I didn't have a child to ride her anymore but only on Facebook and now they are selling her they've given my number to prospective sellers so I can tell them more about the pony as I had her for 12 of her 13 years. I would like to keep track of where she ends up in case i'm ever in a position to offer her a retirement home in the future. I won't be hassling new owners though just letting them know where I am if they need any info or have to sell her in the future.
 
Quite a few of the people I have sold ponies to have kept in touch to some extent, even if they have just sent an Xmas card or a photo from a show where they've won something.
 
bexcy-bee said:
Why sell and wish you hadn't? I wish I hadn't sold either of my last 2 horses, I'm sure it didn't help that they were sold and picked up within 3 days of each other.

I wish I hadn't sold smokey, but I knew I had to for his sake. I wish I hadn't sold him, but circumstances mean I had to. I found the best home for him I could have ever wanted, and I'm sure I annoy his owners with constant likes and comments on him on Facebook, but they know how much that horse meant to me so I hope they understand.
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No, you don't annoy us! It's lovely how much he means to you and trying to show you that we're keeping him in the style he prefers is really important to us, and he is such a huge personality that of course you miss him. Hopefully next year we can arrange meet-ups so he can expand his team of dedicated cheerleaders even more.

Generally, keeping in contact in the age of facebook and twitter and social media like that is hardly difficult. We do try hard to maintain some vague connection, especially if the owner asks us too. It's not even hard to- Al sticks photos up on FB and tags Becky, and then she can see how the small fat one is doing!

It does help, admittedly, that Becky only ever offers advice about him if asked and never without us asking, and her lovely posts on FB have been really supportive and kind. It's made everything easier and has given Al lots of shortcuts in working out his little quirks and funny ideas so they've formed a really solid bond because of that.

(if you ever want more updates or photos, just ask btw. Smokes is hardly an unwilling model! And when I next see them both I'll take proper pretty pictures with my posh camera.)
 
I have a Welsh D that I bought as a five year old from his breeder and almost six years on she asks after him and I forward photos to her. I also keep in touch with the breeder of my minis and send her photos regularly. I think it is nice to know that a horse you have parted with is happy and settled in a new home and as long as the new owner is happy to keep in touch what is the problem?
 
Spring Feather said:
Some breeders have their stock registered with the associations whereby we will take back our stock should they ever run into any hardship. Mine are all registered. It's part and parcel of being a breeder, in that you will forever be responsible for an animal that you brought into this life. Shame so many others don't view this as the right thing to do.
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Absolutely. I'm glad to know breeder and professional producers who think this way. Just a couple of winters ago, a horse I knew had fallen on hard times and didn't look like it would last the winter if drastic action wasn't taken. I tracked down the breeder and he diplomatically offered to help out the owner. As soon as he'd won her round, a huge horsebox appeared, battling for 2 hours through heavy snow to take the old girl home.
 
See, I'm pretty sure that if the OP bought a horse that turned out to have issues, they would be keen to contact the seller to try and find out the background. As would anyone. The lady who now has my old mare tracked me down via the breed society to ask about her and let me know how she was doing. I gave her my contact details and told her everything I knew, why I sold (own health issues), etc. Turned out to be helpful, and we still chat occasionally.

So presumably sellers who remain in contact are actually doing the right thing? Or are we now saying anyone who breeds a litter of say puppies has no further duty of care once they are sold? Because I don't feel we can have it both ways. Either our responsibility remains on some level, or it doesn't at all.

How many threads have we had where a new owner is told to contact whoever sold them their horse and ask for advice? Not just the dodgy selller stuff, but the funny quirks, getting a horse to settle in a new home. If you are a part of an animal's life, you have knowledge of it and may have insight.

On the other hand, if this is just a thread about a thread to have a dig, then it really isn't on.
 
Arizahn said:
Or are we now saying anyone who breeds a litter of say puppies has no further duty of care once they are sold? Because I don't feel we can have it both ways. Either our responsibility remains on some level, or it doesn't at all.

How many threads have we had where a new owner is told to contact whoever sold them their horse and ask for advice?
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We don't even have to move onto a different species; right here on our very own forum, we have a poster who has bought a horse from a breeder and the situation for her has turned into a total nightmare with the end result most likely being the horse will be PTS. The poster has tried to get in touch with the breeder, who appears to have washed their hands of the horse. Disgusting in my opinion. Breeders create life. We have a responsibility for that life. Forever. If all breeders had the same philosophy then the horse market might not be in the state it's in now.
 
Yes- it is up to the new owner, Arizahn, to decide whether they want to contact the old owner/breeder/previous owners. And it is lovely if they keep in contact if both are happy doing so. This is exactly what I have said throughout this thread. But what I'm saying, and NO NO NO this isn't a dig at any particular person post or thread- is that it is ENTIRELY up to the current owners of the horse. The seller has SOLD it- he should not EXPECT constant updates from the new owners.
But if I bought a horse that had 'issues' - behaviour ones I would expect to be able to sort myself, and health ones I would accept I'd been silly in not getting a vet check. Either way, I probably not get in touch with the seller- the deal is done, its now my horse and my problem!!
 
A Foal's Prayer
I live because you made it so,
I die if you may choose it.
My life and trust I give to you,
I pray you don't abuse it.
By Joan Marven

Any decent, caring person can only do their best to find the best homes when they are selling, but it is still nice to hear that the animal is happy/active/etc. I don't expect people to keep them forever, circumstances do change, and it is so easy along the line for the animals to fall on hard times that I do like to know they are safe. I would not interfer if all was well, but a facebook photo here or there is a great resurrance (sp). But yes, at the end of the day, that is the buyer's choice :)
 
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Spring Feather said:
We don't even have to move onto a different species; right here on our very own forum, we have a poster who has bought a horse from a breeder and the situation for her has turned into a total nightmare with the end result most likely being the horse will be PTS. The poster has tried to get in touch with the breeder, who appears to have washed their hands of the horse. Disgusting in my opinion. Breeders create life. We have a responsibility for that life. Forever. If all breeders had the same philosophy then the horse market might not be in the state it's in now.
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Well said. We've also always had any pups back (that we bred) for any reason; sum total over more than 30 years of just 3 pups that we either kept ourselves (one is still here!) or found other life long homes for. I still get cards and updates from owners even when our 'pup' has passed on and they have another; it's lovely to catch up with their news and they all know, right from the start I'm at the end of the phone and will help in any way I can, same goes for my horses.
 
I have never sold my own horse. However, if I had to or felt I needed to. I would be quite upset if the new owner never contacted me to let me know how horse was getting on. But then again I would make it clear I would like to be kept updated not all the time but every now and then.

If I bought a horse off of someone I would have no quarms on keeping them updated every now and then. I loved sending a one-off email to my horses old trainer to let them know he was doing well!
 
I'm still in occasional contact with the new owners of my sec D mare...have them on facebook.

She's super fit, loving her job and they adore her so I'm happy and glad I am kept up to date as it was a tough decision to let her go...
Sometimes they message me out of the blue to tell me what she and her boy have been up to which is lovely.
 
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