Owner wants to return the horse i gifted to her

As sad as it will be for you in the short term taking her back and PTS yourself will feel much more comfortable than letting your 'friend' rehome her to god knows where.
You've tried your best to find her a nice home and it hasn't worked out, you're not in a position to have her back yourself and truely she will know nothing about PTS other than the kindness you are showing her keeping her out of an auction ring/ lorry on the way to france!
 
Could the new owner BR the horse?

Maybe they don't know that it's a very successful option with navicular and they might want to keep her if she can be ridden again?

If they've decided that they don't want the mare at all, then PTS is the kindest thing.
 
Possible that new owner has treated the mare as a "loan" all along - had no intention of true long term care.
This happened to me as well. Gifted (sold for £1) a beautiful sound but a bit elderly mare to her sharer. 6 months later found out the mare was in dire situation. All the while sharer had been sharing, she'd been great but turned out she had no intention to care for a whole horse. Horse continued to get half of everything, including not enough food in my opinion! In my case the new owner refused to discuss with me. She was now the owner, after all. Horse badly shod, no longer sound, skinny .... I was devastated. I'd have pts if I thought she would end up like that. I thought selling for £1 would make the owner feel like an OWNER.

(actually this story did have a happy ending as we came to an arrangement. In exchange for me not punching her lights out, new owner moved the mare back onto my farm and gets free full livery - she pays for DIY + hay/etc but my yard girl and I do all the work, for the love of the mare. Mare still belongs to her former sharer but is now ridden by yard girl. The lights getting punched out offer still stands lol. Mare looking beautiful again!)
 
I don't know where all these evil people come from, but they sure are in excess in the horse world.
You can be sure that if there is a big vet bill you will be getting that horse back.
btw as the keeper of the animal, by law, you should be holding the passport.
Make sure you have a list of yard legalities posted somewhere in the yard, at the moment she seems to have you by the short and curlies.
 
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I know you say she is high maintenance, but it's surprising how they do cope. I know a very pampered show pony (stabled every night, rugged to the yahoo) who is now happily roughing it on a hill somewhere. And thriving, grown a coat like a mammoth. She may cope turned away and barefoot for a while to let you consider options.
 
Faracat said:
Could the new owner BR the horse?

Maybe they don't know that it's a very successful option with navicular and they might want to keep her if she can be ridden again?

If they've decided that they don't want the mare at all, then PTS is the kindest thing.
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This. If trying taking the shoes off is not possible due to time/finance etc then I would have her back and PTS.
 
MrsD123 said:
I don't know where all these evil people come from, but they sure are in excess in the horse world.
You can be sure that if there is a big vet bill you will be getting that horse back.
btw as the keeper of the animal, by law, you should be holding the passport.
Make sure you have a list of yard legalities posted somewhere in the yard, at the moment she seems to have you by the short and curlies.
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I do wish people would read threads before posting. OP GIFTED the horse to the now owner!!!
 
If the new owner is so quick to give up on the horse they obviously don't have the same sense of responsibility as you. They are also living in fairy land thinking a charity will take her. You need to take control of the situation again, for your own peace of mind.

There is a small chance you could find a companion home for her. I don't know why people want ponies as companions when all they do is get laminitis if left in the field. If I was looking for a companion horse I'd want something that can eat grass all day long and not have me worried.

If rehoming options and grass livery options are impossible then PTS. What a terrible situation for you to be left in.
 
MrsD123 said:
I don't know where all these evil people come from, but they sure are in excess in the horse world.
You can be sure that if there is a big vet bill you will be getting that horse back.
btw as the keeper of the animal, by law, you should be holding the passport.
Make sure you have a list of yard legalities posted somewhere in the yard, at the moment she seems to have you by the short and curlies.
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sorry posted to wrong thread, but some of same applies!
 
MrsD123, I gave the passport to the new owner when she took her.
I did barefoot rehab last time on top of all the drugs, boxrest ect. I managed to get her right again but it took over a year or so to do. I really don't think the new owner wants to do a long term treatment plan, she wants something she can ride.
I feel terrible but whether she's sound or not, if I take her back then it's going to put a big strain on me. If it was summer then it would just be the money issue but they're stabled at night through winter and I have my baby napping in the car while I rush to muck out ect. If those jobs get doubled then I'll never manage. Also, then I wouldn't be able to care for either horse in the way I'd like to and the way they deserve.
The problem is that knowing me if I bring her back then I'll end up keeping her. I'm sure some of the people on the yard will think I'm heartless and make me feel even more guilty. It would be typical of her to make a miraculous recovery as soon as she's home and I'll be left struggling to cope for the next decade or two!
Im pretty sure it won't be cheap to put her to sleep either and I don't have a few hundred pounds to pay out atm! What a horrible situation. Maybe I could try and convince the new owner to take off her shoes and not ride her till the new year and see if that helps and if not then she should pts. At least it might buy us some time to weigh up our very limited and unpleasant options.
Can't thank you all enough for your advice. I honestly had no idea what your take would be on the situation and it's been so helpful x
 
DaisyMae said:
The problem is that knowing me if I bring her back then I'll end up keeping her. I'm sure some of the people on the yard will think I'm heartless and make me feel even more guilty.

Im pretty sure it won't be cheap to put her to sleep either and I don't have a few hundred pounds to pay out atm!
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You bring the horse back on the yard, and have it put down the next day - and you simply don't tell anyone.

As for cost - depending on what method you use it could be as little as £200. The hunt are very reasonable (and of course you could just take the horse straight there, so it doesn't even go back to the yard).
 
amymay said:
You bring the horse back on the yard, and have it put down the next day - and you simply don't tell anyone.

As for cost - depending on what method you use it could be as little as £200. The hunt are very reasonable (and of course you could just take the horse straight there, so it doesn't even go back to the yard).
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In your situation I would seriously consider straight to the kennels and away.
You tried to get the horse settled in a new home it has not worked if you fear the new owner will pass the horse on to god knows what fate this is a kind option .
 
She did know about her past issues but neither of us had reason to think that they'd resurface after being perfectly sound for so long.
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It's a horse, the only thing you can guarantee is that at some point it's going to go lame, and sooner rather than later if it's already had these kind of issues. I think it's a cop out of the person you gifted the horse to to come back at you like this.

If it was me, I'd give her the £1 back, move horse to my yard and then, if retirement or rehab wasn't an option, I'd pts - and do it without telling the person you'd gifted to. It's cowardly of them to put this back on you or to move a lame horse on just because they can't face pts themselves.
 
Nothing useful to add, but how horrid of the new owner :(
I was gifted my horse Ned and he went lame after 5 months, it took from may until the end of october before he was ridable and I never ONCE considered giving him back! He was my problem now and it was me who was going to sort him out.

New owner is really taking the cowards way out and obviously doesn't love the horse :(

I hope everything goes as well as it can *hugs*
 
amymay said:
You bring the horse back on the yard, and have it put down the next day - and you simply don't tell anyone.

As for cost - depending on what method you use it could be as little as £200. The hunt are very reasonable (and of course you could just take the horse straight there, so it doesn't even go back to the yard).
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That that wont happen in any yard,and YO has to be informed, it is only fair.
Best thing is to ask hunt to pick her up.........
 
Goldenstar said:
In your situation I would seriously consider straight to the kennels and away.
You tried to get the horse settled in a new home it has not worked if you fear the new owner will pass the horse on to god knows what fate this is a kind option .
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This or even pay the £1 and then phone the hunt or Knacker to pick her up from where she is now.
 
OP I would find the couple of hundred pounds you need and do the decent thing by this horse – it’s a brutal world out there for unwanted animals.

I don’t think you should be trying to convince new owner to try rehab when vet has said it’s the end of the road. Another who would take the horse back and discretely give it a dignified end. There is no shame in preventing suffering.
 
DaisyMae said:
MrsD123, I gave the passport to the new owner when she took her.
Can't thank you all enough for your advice. I honestly had no idea what your take would be on the situation and it's been so helpful x
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Sorry was answering another thread re passport.
Yes I know you are in a tizz.
Nothing is going to happen today or tomorrow ............. I was in a bizarre situation, in that I had to book a knackerman for my perfectly healthy horse who had no where to live ....... believe me that was desperation ....................... things are not that bad :)
I hope the horse lovers in DUNOON recognise this, get down on their knees and pray for forgiveness.
 
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Auslander said:
Why?
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I was in a bizarre situation, in that I had to book a knackerman for my perfectly healthy horse who had no where to live ....... What more do you need to know, my horse was being abused ........ no one in Dunoon wanted to give him a home or help me to move him................
I got some sort of divine intervention, but I am scarred.
 
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OP - Nothing to add really - but I am in the PTS camp. She won't hold it against you, and that's what matters. It would be the best, quickest and kindest option - to get the hunt to collect her form where she is at the moment. Go and see her to say your goodbyes if you feel you need to -but it really is the kindest thing in the circumstances. I can't see the point in keeping and turning away really - why would you put yourself through a winter of financial hardship, and her through weather that is going to make her more uncomfortable - bony conditions don't like the cold. Yes - she may come sound, but equally, she may not, or not for any length of time. Bottom line for me is that you gave her away because you don't have the time or money for two horses, and struggling to manage an extra one again wouldn't be fair to you, your family, your other horse or her.
 
MrsD123 said:
I was in a bizarre situation, in that I had to book a knackerman for my perfectly healthy horse who had no where to live ....... What more do you need to know, my horse was being abused ........ no one in DUNOON wanted to give him a home or help me to move him................
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I don't see how you can blame others for a horse that is/was your responsibility, just because they live in the same area. Sorry!
 
Auslander said:
I don't see how you can blame others for a horse that is/was your responsibility, just because they live in the same area. Sorry!
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He was a horse I "sold" [ie not a paid for by the Evil One] and was then abused.

Morally, he was my responsibility, legally I had the option to walk away [SSPCA advice and Evil Ones preferred option], so I got him back ££££££ ............... by this time he was in Dunoon, I got him back in to full health but no one would give him a stable............. let them go down on their knees and ask for forgiveness............ they know who they are...........
I could not walk him to a new home and he would not load except under certain conditions [his conditions!]
 
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I'm not misreading the OP at all, I don't think. If she can't get the time or money together to deal with the horse if it comes back (whether it's to turn away/rehab/PTS), then the decision has to rest with the new owner. If the OP still feels a moral obligation to the horse, then she has a choice of either scraping together the time and the money to do whatever is the right thing by the horse (and if the horse has a decent chance of coming right without undue suffering in the meantime---no idea if it does, as am not the horse's vet and have never seen it, then that choice may not be PTS), or of giving all the information and help she can to the new owner, so that the new owner can herself make the right decision. I don't think anyone on this thread has enough information really to be advising categorically, "PTS".

It's not as easy to say "the new owner shouldn't own horses/is heartless" etc. The crux is, there is a 16yo horse with recurrent lameness, which may or may not be treatable, and this horse is not convenient for either the old owner (lack of money and time) or the new owner (thinks the horse is untreatable/permanently unrideable). Understandably, the old owner feels guilty/responsibe, as she thought she'd sorted the horse with a permanent home, and also understandably, the new owner possibly feels as though she's been saddled with an unrideable field ornament. Why not get all the information from the vet, and find a good companion home if that's feasible for the mare? I have a companion mare here that can't be used in the riding school due to an unfortunately-placed melanoma. She's happy, healthy, and very much valued for the sanity she brings to the paddock, and the owners get updated on how she's doing (round).
 
I'd probably pay the "new" owner £1 for the horse, then arrange for the hunt to come and PTS at current home, then horse is not being transported around too much.
 
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