Pathological Liars :-p!!!

Actually just had a phone call straight from Yogi, apparently Av is so talented that she is actually on the 2012 team. I obviously wont be doing anything bigger than intros next year to mimise risk of injury...shame but Yogi did beg ;-)[/QUOTE]


dam so i have to go round badders while you get free pass? :)
just had some weirdo guy on phone asking if he could have the ride on the beast...oliver streetstart town first.. townend? never heard of him before but had lovely northern accent?:D
 
now these are my fave type of horsey people- they are what having horses is all about :D some good examples:

- well blah blah blah (read useless advice that i should be taking on board about my young eventer) "when i was eventing"- fair dos you did 2 events and were eliminated in the SJing at both :p

- "i honestly think that people need to sit on my horse. i know he looks like he's going nicely but he feels horrid" erm, yes he looks horrid too. ;):eek:

- "i've been on the GB young rider team"- this was told to a friend of mine who is a lovely (but clueless) horsey mummy. a quick check of BE records showed that said 'expert' had done a few JRNs (and not very successfully)

- "i paid X (insert stupid/inflated price) for my horse"- when really it was an average amount. i'm actually proud of the fact that i paid very little for my horse!

- "oh i wish i had my old horse back- would think nothing of jumping the advanced fences with him" oh please god, i wish you could have old horse back as i would love to see that :rolleyes:

this all makes me sound terribly bitchy- which i'm really not and i also am fully aware that i am crap. it just makes me chuckle to hear the bull coming out of people's mouths- and the best thing is that they usually believe it!:D
 
I don't know about Badminton and all that being not that big! My last RI really did compete at that level, there is a picture of her horse jumping Cottesmore leap hanging in her kitchen, and she said, "I nearly poohed myself when I walked the course, that jump was mahoosive" :D:D

But yeah, every yard has a"Jackanory specialist" we had one at my last yard, did everything on her "Old Mare" utterly terrified, of the current horse but had owned her from birth?

And may I just add, I miss my old horse terribly, and did do many things on her, that I would never attempt on my new horse,

A: Because I am now 43, not 20, and falling off hurts more, and is further down, as new horse is taller than old horse!

B: I owned old horse for most of her, and at least half of my, life!

C: New horse IS a bit of a flighty piece!!
 
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I have a friend that uses the royal 'we' - she never rides, but likes to make out that Burghley is the next stop.
Have you done anything with Dobbin?
"We went to so and so, he went really well in dressage, jumped brilliantly round the sj but it's not quite big enough for him and had one little stop where we had to ride a massive ditch into the woods"
Dobbin has entered ten intro events, withdrawn from three, retired from four and finished last in his section every other time. Does the girl not know I can look up the results ;) I love her dearly, but she is a pathological b*llshi**er!
 
BuBbleMooJim said:
I don't know about Badminton and all that being not that big!"
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Arrrrggghhh, this is how it starts! See! I even posted again to clarify, to no avail. :( :( :(

I said they're not as big as the 4'6" xc that ace-bull****er claimed to have been jumping on turbocob, not that they're "not that big".
Wait for it, now I'm going to be labelled as the person who said Badders & Burghley are pathetically small & I could pop round there on my gangly clueless 5 yr old... ;) ;) ;)
*despairs*
 
LOL I feel sad for people who need to tell lies and hope they can overcome whatever insecurities they have which makes them feel they have to do this.
 
:D

I was chatting to my (not really horsey but pony-club-dad boss) and ended up discussing riding. He asked if I competed much and I said no, not much, I've done the odd dressage test but I prefer having fun schooling my horse.

He said 'Oh, I know what you horsey types are like, if you don't know the front end from the back you'll say you're aiming for 2012, if you're marvellous you won't admit to it.'

My horse is marvellous, he's also retired and almost spherical. Last time I competed it was on horse-who-looks-like-a-cow, and I could hear the judge hooting with laughter throughout, most particularly when said horse interpreted my medium trot aid as 'you're a trotter again and this is a race -GO GO GO!' 30 mph on the long diagonal? No problem.
 
Thanks guys..this is brilliant- I feel zen like and exorcised! (..and I am also giggling to myself!)

but I do have one thing to highlight- spread the word...Kerilli thinks that Badminton is teenyweeny PHHAAAHAHAHAHAHA :-P
 
I've heard a lot of lies, and when you live in a small equestrian community, it's rather easy to spot and therefore just embarrassing!

- A girl came to look around our yard because she had 7 dressage superstars, all of whom she bred and produced..... did I mention that she was about 16 at the time and all of these superstars turned out to be fictional?

- Went to a competition, and someone asked H's name, so I told him. He then told me that when H was still on X yard (That I've never heard of) he rode him, and haven't we gone a down a few levels since then? :eek:

- Someone offered my mother at large amount of money (We're talking over $100,000) for Dhav (A grumpy prat who dislikes most people other than my mother); a quick bit of googling showed that this woman lived in a tenement building and was bankrupt!
 
ah had that and it did take a while for the penny to drop. Stupid thing was the girl actually owned a truly classy coloured boy who was successful in whatever he turned his hoof to - he won workers at county level albeit with another rider, upto elementary dressage and PN as well. However, liar of an owner had to say horse was working at GP, had been placed in the first PN with her so actually diminished what he did. We had massive fall outs as she was great one for borrowing basic stuff and denying it (we are talking stupid things like lead ropes - not expensive but horrendously annoying when yours goes missing - even more when YO has a large number of old ones hanging outside her office!)

But to add to this thread - ever noticed the number of the old women (think guillotine watchers) who like to sit and critisize the riders yet when you find out what they did it was never higher than PN..!
 
I am so loving this thread.
I have found a lovely way of getting back at the story tellers, when they start going off on one telling me they have done this and that my usual reply is "excellent you are just the person i need to talk to and ask for some help, is there any chance you could pop on one of my youngsters and show me how to do ....." i normally ask them to show me how to get my youngsters going in the direction to be doing that.
Never yet has any of them helped me, and they never brag in front of me again.
Sorry i know its spiteful but it does make me giggle.
Yeah kerilli thinks 4* fences are small
 
To be honest I do tend to feel sorry for the types that feel the need to lie, especially when technically they are just harmless lies, not like spreading nasty rumours or trying to get another person down. It just shows their insecurity like a great big neon arrow pointing to their heads!! lol I always just tend to go along with it and would never wont to show someone up or make them feel worse.

However, that's the one thing I love about horses. You cannot blag your way through anything with them! I know the moment I get too excited about my horse going nicely *WHAM* i am on the floor. (such as last night for example - telling my friend how nice my horse was going and finally getting more confident and on the floor I am) Love it. Theres simply no getting around that your anything other than what the horse wants you to be lol

xx
 
I remember one girl who came to work at the livery yard I was working at. My boss came up to me and said "blahs name is starting work and she'll be riding out with you today, she can ride Moon as she is a confident rider, she told me she has been riding for 10years and had owned her own for x amount of years".

Went out for a hack with the girl all morning going on about ridng this, competing here there and everywhere. I asked if she was ok tacking up, showed her where everything was and left her to it. Went to go out on a hack and I mounted my horse. As the girl got on I told her to check her girth and she asked me how, I told her the correct day and the girl let go of the girth and was left sitting on the horse's saddle with the girth hanging down.
Turned out the girl had only ridden a few times as a young girl and hadnt ridden for 5 plus year.
It could of been very dangerous and we made the girl have lessons and only rode the plods.

I now never believe people when they say how much they have done untill I have seen them ride.
 
avthechav said:
Thanks guys..this is brilliant- I feel zen like and exorcised! (..and I am also giggling to myself!)

but I do have one thing to highlight- spread the word...Kerilli thinks that Badminton is teenyweeny PHHAAAHAHAHAHAHA :-P
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Hmph, thanks for that. You wait, this'll become GOSPEL now.
Do me a favour, the first person you hear saying "Did you hear what that Kerilli off the internet said? That Badders and Burghley are tiny! Who DOES she think she is?" - shoot them. Thanks.

Just remembered, pathological horsey liars aren't all young. I knew a woman yonks ago who was in her 60s or 70s then, who claimed to have had a string of 6 Advanced horses in the '50s and '60s, and to have done the 4*s. She was incredibly opinionated and nasty, and spectacularly bitchy about Princess Anne, who she claimed to have competed against.
Hmmm, I asked a friend who did do Badminton back then (yes, really, I've seen the pictures and everything, she did, she did!) and she had never heard of this woman - it was a very small select group at the top back then (not very unlike now I guess) and my friend also said that nobody had 6 Advanced horses back then, it was just unheard of... so, just another delusional loony.
I wonder if it happens to everyone when their memory goes, with age. Maybe Old Folks' Homes are full of people sitting there remembering their imaginary glory days, wondering where they put all their Olympic medals... ;) ;) ;)
 
kerilli said:
Wait for it, now I'm going to be labelled as the person who said Badders & Burghley are pathetically small & I could pop round there on my gangly clueless 5 yr old... ;) ;) ;)
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Well as long as you move out of the way as Hovis and I fly past showing you how its done then I won't hold it against you
Hovis is a little concerned about going to said events though as he might bum into his number one stalker. Despite repeated requests from me, a letter from our lawyer and a stern warning from Hovis' agent some bloke called fox-pitt keeps begging to take Hov around Burghley.....sheesh some people
 
Oh yes I know a twit like this.The claim was he`d "beaten Harvey Smith" at Hickstead,now that was hard to swallow,turned out he was one of the many in the "School Team jumping event". From that his pathetic little brain elevated himself into Grade A (at thirteen) and beating the best.Afraid that ,on checking,his name was unknown on the BSJA data site,so he did`nt even affiliate as a Junior.
Although one should feel sorry for these inadequates ,it is niggling that they insult our intelligence ..is`nt it!:mad:
 
Well I just wanted to share with you my latest achievement.

Last night in the lesson we had to attempt a flying change and not only did my little mare do this but she took off into the air and we flew round the yard a few times before doing a perfect landing right in the middle of the school.

Honestly :)
 
kerilli said:
Just remembered, pathological horsey liars aren't all young. I knew a woman yonks ago who was in her 60s or 70s then, who claimed to have had a string of 6 Advanced horses in the '50s and '60s, and to have done the 4*s. She was incredibly opinionated and nasty, and spectacularly bitchy about Princess Anne, who she claimed to have competed against.
Hmmm, I asked a friend who did do Badminton back then (yes, really, I've seen the pictures and everything, she did, she did!)
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Were they even smaller back then :P

Yup, gospel.
 
Glad it isn't just my yard that hangs on to the nutters! From listening to them you would honestly believe that half of them are beating the 2012 selectors off with a s**ty stick! Makes me feel fairly crap until I remember that my mare will hack out and school like a legend - no rearing at blades of grass and flipping out at leaves in the school for us thank you very much (ooooh, unless I think she is going well and have asked for someone to take a couple of picks - goes badly wrong then!!!).
 
Ha! Try this for size. I was shown the advert for a horse a couple of weeks ago and the seller's final paragraph stated that an A* star home was more important than the money, where it would be loved "like I love her". Actually I know the horse in question and the owner doesn't give a ***** about it. She only comes down once a week, the poor thing is starving steadily in a muddy, grassless field, it hasn't seen the farrier for nearly 2 months and she has currently gone away without bothering to tell anyone. On the odd occasion it has been brought in to a stable, it has still been waiting for breakfast after 1pm the following day. Apparently this is normal behaviour for her. People like this should be banned from keeping a rubber duck.
 
I'll see you all at badminton and burghley next year then you will recognise me I am the one on the welsh A we didnt have to qulaify because we are just soooooo amazing ;) :p :D
 
Millyard Rejects said:
Actually just had a phone call straight from Yogi, apparently Av is so talented that she is actually on the 2012 team. I obviously wont be doing anything bigger than intros next year to mimise risk of injury...shame but Yogi did beg ;-)
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dam so i have to go round badders while you get free pass? :)
just had some weirdo guy on phone asking if he could have the ride on the beast...oliver streetstart town first.. townend? never heard of him before but had lovely northern accent?:D[/QUOTE]

You jest but I was once on a yard with a girl who after retruning from an intro competition told the rest of the liveries that Yogi had called her Dad that he wanted her horse for the british team!
 
Ah but dont you all know that little 14.3hh heinz 57's are the best horses as they can jump 5ft and do GP dressage and of course badminton (being teeny lol:);)) is not problem to them haha!!

Hmm isnt it odd that I happen to own a 14.3hh :D:D;)

I dont see the appeal in it to be honest everything is on the net and is google-able so they get found out eventually. Also the horsey world is small despite what people may think and EVERYTHING gets back!!

Ignore them and sit and have a snigger to brighten up the working day :)

Nikki xxx
 
There's always one...

I knew a girl who kept two horses - one a youngster, one a schoolmaster that was dead from the feet up (no offence by that, it was actually a nice horse but not exactly difficult) - she was terrified of both of them. Never rode the youngster and left him to her trainer and barely rode the other either - the average was about 20mins once a fortnight.

But to HEAR her... sheesh... you'd think she taught William Fox-Pitt, Laura Bechtolwotsit and John Whitaker everything they knew - oh and Monty Roberts could probably pick up a few pointers from her too. Continually dishing out 'advice' to me on how to deal with my horse until I politely told her to bog off!

'Apparently' at the yard where she 'used to work' she was always put on the sticky ones that no-one else could ride and only she could get them going well/stay one etc etc. Tbh although it all sounded a bit farfetched, I gave her the benefit of the doubt until I saw her on one of the yard horses - it spooked in walk (well sidestepped!), she fell off and spent the next fifteen minutes hyperventilating and saying she was going to faint... Quite frankly I wish she had - it might have shut her up for five minutes!!!
 
Ah, Taffyhorse, this reminds me of someone who turned up on the doorstep years ago wanting to ride and when I asked if she was any good, said over-confidently "I'm good". Should have shown her the door immediately... I put her on Patent Safety Pony, he sidestepped carefully when she inexplicably aimed him straight at a jump wing, and she plopped straight off. Beyond belief.
Or the "really sticky, brave" rider who jumped straight off the moment a horse had a tiny trying-it-on jibbing moment.
You can't feign courage, at least not around horses!
 
RW1 said:
You jest but I was once on a yard with a girl who after retruning from an intro competition told the rest of the liveries that Yogi had called her Dad that he wanted her horse for the british team!
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That is brilliant! A guy who used to be on my yard went through a stage of buying cheap horses to 'reschool' before selling on. He was 'Very Knowledgeable'

He used to say things like- 'oh yes, this one has got jumping legs hasnt she, she will be able to jump 1.05.'

or

'This one is Irish, they can all jump- look at her jumping neck, she will be able to jump 1.10'


...now I'm no great confo judge but I didnt know that you could be that precise about jumping ability just by looking at legs...If only I had known when I was looking for a horse amazing!!
 
one girl at uni used to talk alot about how she had evented alot. Didnt really pay a whole pile of attention, then she suddenly came out with how she'd been on the under 21's eventing team. Then she'd jumped regularly at 3*, then she's jumped a couple of 4*'s but she'd frightened herself so had stopped. Yep, you got it, looked up her eventing record........................what record?? absolutely zip on BE. What a pillock.
 
Someone I knew lied that her brother died, :eek: and we honestly did believe her at first, then once everyone had forgotten about that her cat and pony died! (She didn't even have a pony.) Then it was that she was adopted, but that one came back to bite her when her mum found out. ;)
 
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