people watching your lessons *mini rant*

NeverSayNever

NeverSayNever

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a thread on another forum has got me thinking about this... and I already knew i had strong feelings on it, but I have PMT, so forgive , Im gonna rant a bit:p

when i was a kid we lived near a big RS with an indoor and a gallery. I used to go most days to watch lessons, and that was fine BUT if it was a private lesson god help you if you didnt ask permission! It just wasnt the done thing to even go in the school!!!

now- if i attend a clinic, RC lesson or group lesson i kind of expect there to be people watching... friends/relatives of those riding and prob some other lurkers who are enjoying watching the lesson and there to gleen tips themselves.



BUT


if i book a PRIVATE lesson with my own RI, i expect it to be just that. private :mad: why should others think it ok to 'lurk' and benefit from what Im paying for? Why should ANYONE else be there full stop? ! personally i think its flippin rude to rock up and expect to watch someone's lesson. I would even ask, say at a livery yard before watching someone school tbh! I think its only manners!


think this maybe shows why i keep my horse at home:o:D


**mutters and grumbles off into a corner**
 
It doesn't bother me in the slightest if people watch as long as they don't make a load of noise, let their dogs run around the arena or let their kids scream.

I suppose I'm quite lucky in one way that I have a different flatwork instructor to everyone else at my yard, and because she's a classical instructor rather than the two usual BHS and dressage instructors who teach there, people tend not to bother watching. People at our yard tend to pop over and watch for 5 or 10 mins then get bored and wander off again. I had a jumping lesson (shared with 1 other though, not shared) on Weds evening and we had an audience for most of that.

It honestly doesn't bother me and because what they're teaching is so specific to my horse, it wouldn't mean much to others anyway. In our flatwork lessons, we work a lot on the ground and the ridden work is very specifically targeted to things I need to improve or to particular parts of the horse, so it wouldn't mean anything to anyone watching. I've watched a couple of my flatwork instructor's private lessons with others and although they're interesting, they weren't really relevant to me and my horse.
 
You have a point and yes I agree, last thing you want is some nosey buggars whispering in the corner when your have a private lesson.

I'd never do it out of respect, so you'd expect others would not either, but unfortunately not everyone gives a monkeys and yes they do have the down right cheek.

You can come out of your corner now. :D
 
I am sorry but I disagree with this, I don't mind people watching my lessons, as long as they don't interrupt or interefere in any way. It is a good way to learn. I enjoy standing and watching people ride, and I only watch if I think I can learn something - surely that is a compliment to who is riding? If someone asked me not to watch, or if I knew someone didn't like being watched, I would happily respect that.
 
People quite often watch lessons on our yard - no one seems to mind tbh. It's always so interesting to see different styles of teaching and methods etc. As well as the opportunity of watching some really great riders ride some really great horses. :D
 
I must admit i dont like it but have gotten used to it - i take it as a compliment they must want to watch my fantastic riding - lol ;)

Seriously the only lessons ill ever sit through are those of advanced riders that will teah me a thing or too - take is a good thing that they must wanna learn from u x
 
At the yard I ride at now though, it is very busy, so it's very hard no to see someone having a lesson. I really don't mind people watching me - I may look like a fool, but it doesn't really matter to me! After all, I enjoy watching other people have lessons because I learn a lot - so why shouldn't they do the same? xx
 
QR

You see I'm the opposite, I don't mind people watching my lessons, more people to take pics ;)
I like things going on, as I've got a youngster I like them to get used to working whilst there are distractions. Obviously I don't like a dog barking it's head off, but a quiet dog is fine, infact my instructors dog is often in the arena with us. The YO is often playing with his JCB next to the arena, that's good IMO, get's her used to things.

Have you asked them not to "lurk" and watch your lesson?
 
Im not sure they would think they have to ask to watch? I wouldnt have thought that? If you dont like them watching, it might be best to tell them. As long as they are quiet, and dont watch if you tell them it bothers you? After all, you could always watch theirs, I dont think you can steal a lesson in this way if you're not in there, on a horse?
 
Nobody really bothers to watch other people's lessons at our yard - unless the person riding is a total twit and people want to see them fall off!

Seriously though, if someone wanted to be bored to death, they would be welcome to watch any of my private lessons, as long as they didn't distract either me, my trainer or my horse. We often get pony club using the clubhouse, which looks directly down into the school. I think it is quite sweet to see a line of little faces at the window looking down.
 
Kenzo said:
You have a point and yes I agree, last thing you want is some nosey buggars whispering in the corner when your have a private lesson.

I'd never do it out of respect, so you'd expect others would not either, but unfortunately not everyone gives a monkeys and yes they do have the down right cheek.

You can come out of your corner now. :D
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lol - i am not alone!!! :D

i think as you said its a matter of respect. I have watched others private lessons but goodness me i would ALWAYS politely ask, do you mind if sit here quietly and watch?

- if i hire a school,pay for a private lesson and trailer my horse there, i expect it to be just that; private.
 
Im not keen on people watching full stop but that is mainly because i can often ride like a plank and i dont need it to be public knowledge! :D
To be fair there a some people i would rather not watch me ride mainly because i know they like to chat about people behind their backs and feel they know better, other than that i just suck it up. If your having a lesson i tend to feel that my consentration will be on me, my horse and the insructor not everyone else.
If it goes wrong then fine but i would get the royal a**e if people werent respectful about watching and end up causing me an issue.
 
I love watching lessons and people ride, but I ALWAYS ask first. Purely because I HATE anyone watching me ride as it just makes me paranoid!! However, if I rode well then I may not mind, but as I look truely horrendous I really hate people looking on and it doesn't help my mare is very sensitive to me, so the worse i am she goes even worse than our normal standard of horrible.. lol

But yeah, I know how you feel. Some of us like it, some of us don't.
xxx
 
It doesn't actually bother me tbh - I think it prepares me better for competitions as it's gotten me used to people watching and I no longer ride like such a plum just because there is someone watching.

I do however detest it when people try to speak to/question/distract your RI during the lesson - I'm paying well for their time - not for someone else to ask for help with their problems!
 
NeverSayNever said:
- if i hire a school,pay for a private lesson and trailer my horse there, i expect it to be just that; private.
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Oh yeah... If I went somewhere else then that's a definite no way.

God, I have just passed my trailer test and went out for the first time yesterday. I am now looking forward to hiring out different schools to practice getting my ned used to different places. To think that people would watch (it all being new and scary anyway, with a less then well behaved horse) I would totally hate that and freak out.. I suppose we are not going to have much of a dressage career though my view on this.. lol
 
i hate people watching me ride... :eek: i think its because i have very low self esteem about my riding and get convinced that people are laughing at me :eek: not so much now i have moved yards but on my old yard there were lots of people who would watch you and then give you unsollicited advice (both to your face and not :rolleyes:) about how **** you are...new yard is much nicer and way more supportive! :D
 
heidirusso said:
Oh yeah... If I went somewhere else then that's a definite no way.

God, I have just passed my trailer test and went out for the first time yesterday. I am now looking forward to hiring out different schools to practice getting my ned used to different places. To think that people would watch (it all being new and scary anyway, with a less then well behaved horse) I would totally hate that and freak out.. I suppose we are not going to have much of a dressage career though my view on this.. lol
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but you see - this is what im talking about! i keep my horse at home,so any time i go for a private lesson its under these circumstances. I pay to hire a school, pay for an RI, trailer out there......

i think if you are on a yard, it's *slightly* different, although i still wouldnt do it. but its one of the reasons im NOT on a yard,lol
 
To be honest I don't mind people I know watching me, as we'll often discuss how they thought I was riding and how my horse was going afterwards and I find that interesting.

I don't like strangers watching me, especially if we're doing something new, or if me or my horse is having a bad day, as I get paranoid about who they are and what they are thinking.

I also don't mind 'stuff going on', as it is all good practice for getting my horse used to concentrating and listening to me, as he does tend to get distacted eaily when I'm out doing a spot of dressage.
 
I think I'm one of the few people that doesn't mind people watching me ride or have lessons, infact I often invite people to come and watch my lessons with Barret!

I compete so therefore I just blank people out anyway and it helps my horses to focus on me when we do have an audience.

And if someone feels the need to b*tch about my riding or publicly state that they can do better............ they can FREELY take the reins and have a go ;) :p
 
My side saddle lessons are private but I always seem to attract a crowd when I have them! LOL, I think people like to see if I'm going to fall off or something :D Because the menage is right next to the bridleway where people walk down, sometimes I even get the dog walkers or the bicyclists stopping and watching too. :p
 
It depends. At my yard people do sometimes watch lesson, but they are usually the ones (there are a couple) who a) hardly ride and b) like to criticize. And yes it annoys me immensely when they watch as I know that they are standing with their arms crossed being nasty when they couldn't for the life of them ride one side of my horse.

If people are nice and friendly, and knowledgeable in their criticism, then no, I don't mind.

If I am jumping, and being a nervous numpty, I woudl rather not have an audience.
 
zoeshiloh said:
I am sorry but I disagree with this, I don't mind people watching my lessons, as long as they don't interrupt or interefere in any way. It is a good way to learn. I enjoy standing and watching people ride, and I only watch if I think I can learn something - surely that is a compliment to who is riding? If someone asked me not to watch, or if I knew someone didn't like being watched, I would happily respect that.
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Yes, I agree with this completely. It doesn't bother me in the slightest if people watch my trainer give me a lesson! In fact, I would be very very happy that I can be of help (albeit indirectly!) to somebody.

I don't think it's 'stealing tips' at all - it's one of the very best ways to learn.
 
i dont mind people watching my lessons, i have one every week with the yard instructor and personally if someone was watching my lesson i take it as a compliment :-) my last instructor used to get people to watch me to understand what she wanted them to do, which made me quite nervous but she obviously thought i was good enough for people to relate to sorta thing
 
We've a public park behind where my daughter schools her pony, so there's often a crowd + dogs. Half the time she doesn't see them because she's concentrating on what she's doing, and it's good because pony doesn't either (dislikes certain dogs as they come in field and chase pony sometimes)
 
Personally, I don't mind. Apart from someone stating quite strongly that they don't want to be watched, then bringing out a chair to watch someone elses lesson. lol
We often watch each other and take vids so the rider can see it for themselves.
 
I hate being watched. I don't mind in a group or shared lesson so much, but i get paranoid if it's just me.
Similarly i would watch a group lesson, or maybe someone at a yard schooling if i knew them well. But i always feel uneasy watching other people's private lessons and so i rarely do. If i really wanted to because they were a talented horse and rider with a classical instructor then i would make a point of asking and ensuring they were completely comfortable. I would never obviously watch a stranger riding.

Also myself and some friend travelled quite a way for a lesson once, even though when we got there it was pretty poor! But all the girls who helped on the yard stood to watch us having this jumping lesson, and i just felt they were waiting for us to fall off. Which one of my friends did, 3 times. And these girls laughed. That is absolutely not on, and very rude.
 
I don't like strangers watching me.

But I think I ride better when my horsey friends or even horsey "friends" are watching me! I am a competitive person and my instructor draws on that. If I am feeling nervous jumping she often encourages another girl to watch. I don't see eye to eye with her about her style of riding and often "show off" (meaning ride by the book, no sloppiness allowed at all!). For the record we are good friends when not near horses, and good friends when she is riding nicely, it is just the odd time when she upsets me!

If she invites someone who I admire down, I want to impress them with my newest talent so she does this even more! Often if I am on my own I tend to focus on one thing then something else goes sloppy so she finds a great way for me to improve faster is to invite someone else to watch along.

Apparently I don't answer back as much when there is someone there :P
 
ok, here's a scenario for all those who say they dont mind....


you pay to hire an indoor school and pay for a private lesson with your RI. You trailer your horse there, arrive and take your horse into the school with your instructor, and close the doors.... as you are warming up 2 unknown people, presumably liveries at the yard where you are hiring the school, open the door, come in and sit down making them selves comfortable in the corner to watch.

............... you wouldn't find that incredibly RUDE ?
 
No, I wouldn't at all, sorry. I would find it rude only if said people actually got on their horses and demanded the riding instruction's attention. That would be rude because you have booked the RI for that hour and they should respect that.

But by quietly sitting on a chair in the corner, they are not actually taking anything away from you! The RI won't even look at them, s/he will still be concentrating on you and you only - and in terms of benefitting from the lesson which you paid for, well, it's clear that YOU are benefitting from it as the RI is training you and you only. You are the only person on a horse and the horse is yours!
 
see to me - the fact its private should mean just that, if youve booked an indoor,there shouldnt be anyone else in there unless you invite them.

if you booked a function room for an hour, how would you feel if someone else came in and sat in the corner?

by the way, im looking for anyone to agree really, i do know im a grumpy cowbag;)
 
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