Please could I have your thoughts re PTS situation?

[wilkinson1]

H, I wonder if I could have your thoughts on my situation please?
I have 2 retired horses - 1 is elderly but still quite well, suffers from arthritis and gets really down in the summer due to horse flies etc. the other is only 13 but LOU due to nerve problems similar to wobblers. Not in discomfort if not ridden. He developed aggressive nodular sarcoids last year that didn't respond to mild treatment and consequently are now pretty big and being in his groin area are starting to rub against opposite thigh. Only going to get worse.
My dilemma is basically when to have them put down. I have already made the decision that they will go together as they have been together for years and years and get very distressed if the other is taken away. It would be more traumatic to leave one without the other right? Also add to the equation that I am due to have my second baby in the next 5 weeks and already have a 15 month old. (not sure if is is really relevant)
I keep thinking I have made the decision and then I get upset and think maybe I am doing it too soon. But I really don't want either to suffer or struggle through a rubbish winter only to be tortured by horseflies all summer whilst the sarcoids get worse.
I want to do the right thing for my boys - please could I have people's takes on this situation please? Thanks very much

 

[cptrayes]

Monday would be a good day to let them go, for me.

 

[wilkinson1]

So better early than too late basically? That's what my rational practical mind is telling me, it's just my sentimental selfish side that is stopping me just getting on with it. I don't know what I expect to achieve by dragging it out, it's inevitably going to happen at some point isn't it.

 

[Bobbly]

There will be plenty of opposing views on this subject but in the end of the day they are your horses and it is your choice and you have to do what is best for both you and your horses. The saying 'Never a day too soon, always a day too late' is very true. If you really believe they are suffering because of their conditions then you are justified in choosing to PTS and your opinion is really the only one that matters in the end of the day.

 

[wilkinson1]

Thanks for reply. I think the problem is that I am not convinced that they are 'suffering' as such from their conditions at this precise moment. But eventually they will and I don't want them to suffer. But am I being too premature and cutting their lives short? I guess is my question.

 

[piebaldsparkle]

Book for Monday, dragging out now you have made the decision will just make it harder IMO.

 

[Kallibear]

PTS can be a kindness. It's so so hard for us but they know nothing about it. Both horses have issues that aren't going to improve and he will most likely suffer this winter. Having them both PTS before the mud really starts, and before you have your baby, wouldn't be too early.

Equally, if you feel the older horse can be keep comfortable over the winter, and you'll cope with a new baby too, they could be reassessed in the spring and a decisions made based on the one with sarcoids.

I agree that letting them both go together would be kindest. Either way I personally don't think now is too early, nor would waiting until the spring, if winter isn't too much of a struggle for either horse.

 

[L&M]

So sorry for your situation, but agree with the others, especially with your pregnancy.

Better a month too early than a day too late.....

 

[Echo Bravo]

Agree with the others let them go together that's what I did with my 2 old mare that had been together for 19 years and best before the really bad weather comes our way.

 

[DJ]

Another who would do it sooner rather than later, but ultimately you have to be comfortable with your decision.

For me, winter is hard enough with out the worry of 2 horses with issues, having it weighing heavy on your mind, whilst trying to take care of a newborn through the worst of the bad weather, like when you`ve said yourself, summer will then be a nightmare for them anyway.

Bless you, of course it is hard, and one of the hardest things you`ll ever do, but why drag out the inevitable? (Sorry that sounded harsher than what i mean, i know only too well how hard it is) x

 

[Lola43]

I have had two pts this year (at different times), both with neurological problems as a result of arthritis in the neck. I have to say, despite the heartbreak, it was done by the vet and it was a really peaceful way to go. Very quick, they knew nothing about it and were eating a bucket of feed when it happened.

It is a difficult decision to make but it sounds like you have given it a lot of thought. I think it is only right and proper to consider the horses' quality of life and isn't it better to quit while you're ahead? You have to do what you think is right - you know your horses better than anyone else.

 

[Izzwizz]

Sooner rather than later, they dont know the concept of time. Better time is now rather than when its icy and freezing cold. I am in a similar situation with a mare of mine. We sold her then were given her back a year ago with kissing spines. I know because I know her so well that she is in pain. We have had Physio, done the in hand work etc but she cannot tolerate being ridden. She is out of the Insurance treatment period, (this was with her previous owner so I have no Insurance available). Shes not the type of horse to live happily in a field, she was more of a competition horse when we owned her and to look at her shes healthy.

You know your horses, you also have a baby on the way and therefore given all the information you have then I think you should go with what in your mind you have decided.

 

[gmw]

You have a baby on the way and a little one already. You dont need the worry of your two horses as well. The sooner they are put at peace the better for you and them. Don't do what I did and leave it too late. Kept putting it off.I had owned and loved her for 22 yrs.Then found my precious mare with a broken leg in her field she had been struggling to get up. I will never forgive myself I kept her for my own selfish reasons. Of course the decision is yours. I wish you well with your new baby.

 

[wilkinson1]

I am so glad you are all saying exactly what I'm thinking. It makes me feel like I am making the right decision overall. It's just breaking my heart, especially the old boy, he is my best friend and we have been a team for almost 20 years. I can't imagine him not being there, but I know that is purely selfish of my own needs. I plan to have it done quietly by the vets, after giving them copious apples and carrots and a good scratch for the old boy (he sticks his head in the air and purses his lips
Then will get them cremated and scatter ashes back in their meadow field. It will get easier won't it as time goes by? (I have never had to do this before )

 

[cptrayes]

You are being very brave and very kind to do this for your horses. Yes, it will get better.

Keep your resolve for a few days, let us know what happens and we will all support you in your decision.

 

[Switchthehorse]

I had a similar decision to make recently and every day I saw the horse it hurt so much I felt upset and SO guilty. Then someone on here said to me they only live for the moment, they have no idea what they might 'miss' or not miss, it's not like us who might regret something tomorrow. You are keeping them going because you are not sure it's right and you perhaps feel guilty, but with other things to focus on like your new baby and your toddler put YOURSELF out of misery, you don't deserve to have this hanging over you, you need to focus on other things. It will be upsetting of course but actually maybe this is the right time to do it - you have other priorities and and exciting and happy times ahead - maybe it's time for a new start for all of you?

Never easy decision but if you decide you will give them the winter you then have it hanging over you every day this winter.. Give yourself a break, you have been a great mum to them, now focus on your new family, you will never forget them but you are moving into a new phase xx

 

[maisie06]

Better a month too early than a day too late.....Personally I would have them done ASAP before the baby comes, the last thing you want to be worrrying about with a newborn is your 2 old pensioners. Sounds like a very sensible decision, especially for the one with the sarcoids which will only get worse.

 

[ladyt25]

Not sure re the sarcoids to be honest. Our old TB got has had some growing between his back legs for a while and they fgot really horrid summer 2012 to the point they were bleeding and the blood was down his legs, in his tail etc and the flies were bothering them. We had to keep cleaning them (and his legs) and chopped his tail shorter so it wouldn't get stuck I them.
Creams didn't work, surgical removal would have been too much as area to be cut out would have been huge. Therefore we decided to try tying them off. We used cable ties and, within 2 weeks both large sarcoids shrivelled up ad fell off! They too had been rubbing his other leg and caused baldness irritation etc. They have not grown back yet.

to You say he has other issues though but without knowing how this affects him then it's a difficult judgement to make. As for the oldie - is he that bad? Are you in an area particularly bad for horseflies? We really don't get any horseflies so, if that is his only problem, are there no alternative places to keep them?

Ultimately it's your decision and people have horses PTS every day for lesser reasons so it's not for us to judge really.

 

[morrismob]

OP, I feel your pain and no-one can judge you they are your horses and your situation is personal to you and them only. I had my super guy pts last week, it broke my heart but he had been retired a year had the most fantastic summer out in a big field with my 3 yr old. He really suffered last winter, could not go out in the wet, couldn't stay in all day and barely tolerated turn out daily in my school. I knew I had to make my mind up with regard to this winter and how it would be managed. In Sepetember I decided he looked fine then early October began to think that he wouldn't. 2 weeks ago I brought the 2 of them in for the winter. He was such a gentleman there was no way I could let him go... Within days he went down fast and in the end I felt it was a day too late.

Follow your mind not your heart. Thinking of you x

 

[YorksG]

It is always a hard decision to make, even more so if it is two together. We have had planned pts a few times over the years and they feel worse in someways than the emergency ones, BUT it is in the horses best interests not to be kept going for the owners interests. How will you feel if either of them has an emergency at the time the baby is due? I think once the decision is made and the best thing is to do the deed quickly and get the worst of the grief felt before the baby is born.

 

[honetpot]

You love them now and you will love them just as much when they are gone, but you will not have the worry of the inevitable happening. At the moment you have choice, I think its much better to make the choice of having them PTS now then having it forced on you when you may not be in the situation to control events. I have had two go this year, one in the snow as an emergency, done under car headlights in the dark and it took two days for the body to be removed, the second planned and the worst thing was the call. I also have another oldie and I just hope I have made the right decision to keep him going over the winter.
Let them go, get some crying done and then get ready for you new baby.

 

[armchair_rider]

I do feel for you. It's an awful decision to have to make. I think you'd be entirely justified in PTSing now - they both have issues which will limit their quality of life (if it isn't already) and they probably won't enjoy a cold wet winter anyway. They're lucky horses to have somebody who cares enough to let them go

 

[Magnetic Sparrow]

If they are that attached to each other, then to let them go together seems a sensible decision to me. The situation you are in makes it sound like getting them pts sooner rather than later would be the best course of action for all of you. If circumstances were different then you might want to take a different decision but you are where you are and you love your horses and your children. If it helps if I was in your shoes I would be planning to have the horses pts before the new baby arrives.

If this is the first time you have had to make the call, be warned that you will feel guilty, but not because you have done anything wrong, just because there's a little bit inside of us that thinks that if we work a bit harder, try a bit more and give more of ourselves that everything might be ok.

Sorry, I'm rambling. Good luck, stay strong.

 

[Adopter]

It is very hard, but you are thinking of the welfare and quality of life of your horses. I am another who would rather make the call a month early than have something happen or go wrong and then it be a distressing emergency.

You have the distraction of a new baby, and with a todler as well you will be very busy in the next few months, don't be hard on yourself let them go and cherish your memories of past times, and the pleasure they have given you

 

[bumper]

I really do feel for you, having had to make that decision myself. I would say now. Your life is going to get much harder, looking after a newborn and a toddler, without worrying about your horses...don't get me wrong, as that sounds unforgivably harsh..but it's true...and they both are only going to get worse, from what you have said. You do have to think about their quality of life. Let them go....and although you will feel terrible, please do remember that you are doing the kindest thing.

 

[SatansLittleHelper]

Definately agree with all of the above..do it soon.
They have no concept of time. You say they are probably not suffering at the moment...thats great, let them go before they do. Hugs, its a tough call xxxx

 

[Woody2013]

Do it soon, you will have some time to grieve before the baby comes. Sorry you are in this situation, all the best xxx

 

[Polos Mum]

I can only agree with the excellent advice above. You will be tired and emotional anyway with the pregnancy and toddler so that is probably making a clear decision more cloudy (I have a 5 month old and a 2 1/2 year old so have some idea what you're going through!)

Looking completely unemotionally, and I'm, not trying to be harsh but you are waiting for them to start to suffer so it makes the decision easier for you. Does that really make sense for them?

 

[AmyMay]

Book for Monday, dragging out now you have made the decision will just make it harder IMO.

Totally agree.

 

[hayinamanger]

It's always hard to make this decision and it's so easy to talk yourself out of it as, of course, you don't want to do it, but you know it's the right thing to do.

Make the arrangements quickly, don't delay, hoping for some improvement in their health. The time between booking the PTS and the actual event is the hardest, you will cry a lot and feel guilty, but don't change your mind. You will be doing these two old friends the ultimate kindness.

I'm sending you lots of ((((((((((((((bravery)))))))))))))) vibes.