Please help! Horse & rider confidence issues - also in CR

[jumpthemoon]

Hi, I haven't posted for ages so hello again. I need some help! I've had my horse for 3 years, and last year we started to actually get out and about SJ. He was an arse through most of the year. When he goes every week he seems to improve, but I cant afford the time or money to go every week. He is just really spooky and stops at fences with fillers.

This is ruining my confidence (which is at an all time low at the mo as we haven't done much lately) and in turn it's not helping his confidence.

I spent all of last year working really hard and we get to the point where we could go out and jump round two rounds, the first being a bit iffy, the second ending up being placed. However, now we've not done much it seems like we're back to square one, and I don't know if I can go through all of that again this year I'm scared to jump something 2ft high if it has a filler under it.

My instructor says to sell him and get something that will give me confidence - what do you think? Also, would I be able to sell him? he's a lovely horse except for this issue, but he's not done much and needs a rider that can give him confidence. I just don't know what to do?

 

[fjordhorsefan]

I sold my last horse as I had battled with his and my confidence for 3 years - I had to give up in the end, as we were both getting worse. I have a horse now who is fab, and will do anything. It was the hardest decisions I have ever made to sell my last boy, as I loved him loads, but we are supposed to enjoy being with our horses and they should enjoy being with us. The horse I sold is having a whale of a time in his new home, doing all sorts, and I and my new horse are having a great time doing shows and all the things I wanted to do with my last horse but was unable to.

Whatever you decide, good luck.

 

[jumpthemoon]

Thanks fjordhorsefan. I'm devastated at the thought of selling him, because I have a really strong bond with him after all we've been through. But like you say, we're supposed to be having fun and I'm just not able to at the moment. I'd love him to be good so we could go out and do xc, or SJ at the weekends and for me not to be worried sick about it before hand. I just dont think I can go through another year like last year

 

[Katie__Connie]

I had this EXACT thing with my old pony... ruined my confidence for a while... i battled with it til I outgrew him about 6 months ago... though to be fair he had improved quite a lot over the time.... I've now bought a bigger pony but she is a dream and I think I should have sold the old pony sooner than I did because I just wasn't enjoying him refusing anything with a filler... Of course it's so hard to make the decision and if you think you can cope with him thats one thing... but remember horses are supposed to be a hobby and for fun... if the fun's gone.. its time to think about selling him imho... good luck with whatever you decide...

 

[jumpthemoon]

Thank you katie - glad to hear you're having fun now

 

[Bens_Mum]

I have just sent my horse for professional schooling after loosing my confidence with him. Ten days on i'm riding him with the help of the lady doing the schooling with confidence , when I thought I wouldn't get on him again. His various issues although not all cured are 100% better and he was mainly it appears feeding off my nerves. We will carry on with the help at the yard until im 100% happy on my own which will probably be a while yet but I feel an enormous sense of achievement just for having one last go and if he is still not for me I will have a more valuable horse at the end of it... Hope you get it sorted out soon I went through so many weeks of anguish over mine but it seems worth it currently (we will see how long it lasts!).