please help

immoralorchid

immoralorchid

Well-Known Member
Joined
7 January 2010
Messages
390
Location
surrey
Visit site
i never thought i would start a thread like this but hey ho
i have a fantastic dales pony 14.2hh snaffle mouthed used to do advanced medium schooling compete at medium in dressage. She used to jump fantastically grids around 3’9 courses of 3’+ with a bold rider (me with a bit of Dutch courage). Just a fab pony you could ask for more I really love her to bits.

She had injeries when I was away on holiday last year. To cut a very long story cut short a girl was told not to ride her but did and tried jumping her without warming up then proceeded to take her out on a hack galloping on ground as hard as concrete (she was seen cantering up a road =(. She has an annular ligament thickening.
Well ever since she has been fab after a lot of vet bills to get her better. Then when we got to our new yard she was behaving very strangely trying to mount my other mare who I had just taken on, rearing, napping and generally being a div. she ended up being kicked in the shoulder by my other horse as she was trying to mount her. A trip to liphook for a month with around 4 surgeries to clear up the osteomyelitis in her shattered shoulder (bone infection from the kick) and to remove her ovary which had a huge tumor which explained the behavior ensued.

So now you are getting the idea of what my darling pony who is my childhood friend (my first pony) has been through. Not to mention her tendon imagery on her right hind which needed a ligament cut (which also happened at liphook) has been through.

So here is the question (and thanks to all the people who have stuck with me).

A friend of mine who I invited to come to my yard wants to borrow Bronte for her daughter of 12 with little riding ability. I think that’s fab as Bronte is now well able to do some light schooling and teach some young people the ropes. I was hoping for more but I now realize her limitations and am hoping to breed so gorgeous foals from her (for me to keep). She then says that Bronte would be great for her daughter to do pony club with.

I said ok as long as I was happy with her and she only did flat work. My friend said she will be fine and that her daughter could take her to camp then jump her. I tried to say that she could only take her to camp (which I am not happy about) if she did only flat work but she just replied well they will know what they are doing there and I am the one paying for it.

I don’t know what to do I love Bronte with all my heart she has been through so much i don’t want to risk her but this person is so pushy do you think bronte will be alright???

Gin and tonic or what ever tipple you like for getting to the end of this really long post
 
This person is not listening to you. Your horse has been through a lot and if they don't listen they could seriously injure her. If you say "no jumping" it doesn't matter what the PC instructors say - they don't know her history, you do.

Personally, I wouldn't let them anywhere near her if she was mine. Who will look after her and pay for the vets if they ignore your wishes and she gets hurt? Just don't think they sound trustworthy.

Good luck with whatever you decide :)
 
I wouldn't let them within 10 foot of my pony again!
They obviously aren't going to respect your wishes, and could well end up hurting your pony. And who would end up footing the vets bills? You.
I would have told them then and there where they could go...
 
Hmmm just tell this pushy person NO as the pony is not fit enough. If she is offended oh well,she'll get over it,aster all it is your pony. The pony has been thru enough.
 
Personally I think you should remind your friend who owns the horse and as she has pointed out she is paying for camp perhaps you should point out that it is you who will pay the vet bills if your poor pony gets hurt. I would also say that if she is not happy following your rules you will gladly have the pony back. Your girly sounds like she has been an absolute star do whats best for her x
 
i agree with the other posters. your pony has been through enough and this person sounds very disrespectful and insensitive towards the situation.
 
If she was mine I would cancel the arrangement and not let them take the pony to camp. I would say that you've decided to put her in foal. The pony sounds far too precious to you, if you were happy with these people, you wouldn't have made this post.
 
At the end of the day she's your pony and, aside from the expense of any more vets bills incurred, you don't want to have to worry about her any more than you already have - sounds like both of you have already been through more than enough. I'd just put the foot down and say no. If it was me, I wouldn't even want her ridden out of my supervision for a day, let alone taken to camp. Very best of luck though with whatever happens.
 
OMG, I would tell her to go forth and multiply, she will obviously ignore yor wishes and then you are landed with vet bills, if you do want a good home for her, there are so many people who want a friend to pamper and hack around on, there are a couple in my yard who do nothing more than play, pamper and gently hack out in their aged horses.:)
 
No way would I let them have the pony. If they are challenging your wishes already imagine what they'll be wanting to do with her once the child is a more confident rider, doesn't bear thinking about.
 
Tell her that no jumping means no jumping.
I would also remind her of your mares previous problems and that being the reason.

If she were mine I would give her the money she spent for the camp and take my horse back. You are obviously a very caring owner and are right in thinking that your horses health comes first.
 
am i right in understanding you still own her? if so, put your foot down! You know you horse and what is best for her.

eta- just read through again and got the gist!
 
Your pony sounds lovely and if you wanted to find a rider for her I am sure you would have people queuing up, but this woman sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. She doesn't sound either experienced enough or willing to listen and learn, so I wouldn't trust her with my pony.
 
If she's not listening to you now before she even has the pony do you really think she will listen to you when her little darling is demanding to do some jumping? Unless you had her absolute word that Bronte wouldn't be jumped and a written agreement stating this and that any vet bills would be paid by her, don't go within a mile of letting them have your gorgeous girl. You have already seen what happens when people don't listen and its not fair on Bronte if she gets another injury doing something she shouldn't be doing in the first place.

Don't let this friend bully you into letting her have Bronte. When you speak to her, think of the injuries she has had, particularly the one caused by that awful girl who rode her when you were away, and tell her in no uncertain terms that you're not happy about Bronte being jumped and that you don't think you can trust her not to jump her.
 
Last edited:
This is going to sound a little blunt,but is not meant harshly at all,but why are you still even discussing the possibility of these people having anything to do with your pony??

They clearly have no regard for your feelings or your mares welfare.It sounds like they think they or the pony club know better than yourself,and TBH even if they said to you that they would do only flatwork could you trust them to stick to that once out of your sight??

You clearly love your pony dearly,and have been a wonderful owner to her up to now,carry on being that wonderful owner and tell these people 'thanks but no thanks'.
She has been through quite a lot as you say,and deserves someone to ride and enjoy her who is as genuine as she is.Am sure that person is out there somewhere,and will hopefully be someone who appreciates her for what she *can* do rather than the people you mention who seem to just want to make her fit in with what they want to do.

Just my opinion of course,and whatever you decide I hope it works out for you.
 
Tell them to bog off, ok you can be a bit more subtle i would just say that as you are not being listened to you couldnt possibly let your lovely pony go somewhere she may come to harm.

Or say you have realised that you have decided in the circumstances as you can not be there to monitor exactly what is going on you cant let her go as you would worry yourself sick and wouldnt forgive yourself if anything happened so you have decided against it.

Its funny there are lots of posts on here about people going on like this i have enough horses of my own to ride but if i ever rode anyone elses i would be even more cautios than i would with my own, if someone is taking this attitude and not taking your feelings in to account or thinking about the horse you can do without them.
 
NO.
that's all. she's yours, she's been through the mill already, she probably won't stand up to galloping and jumping (and what 12 yr old kid won't want to do what all their friends are doing?!) and it's not fair to ask her to.
absolutely NO. your 'friend' needs to find a nice sound uninjured pony for her child to learn on and have lots of fun on, not endanger your mare and worry you sick.
sorry if that's horribly blunt. btw, if your 'friend' takes umbrage at you protecting your lovely old mare, who has been through enough already by the sounds of it, she's no 'friend' imho.
 
Just think how you would feel if you let her go and she got injured. You would never forgive yourself and you know its a bad idea. Some people just don't really understand that ponies are not machines!
 
If she's being pushy and not listening now, it can only be worse once they actually had Bronte. Some light schooling might be good for your horse, but it has to be with the right person. She's been through too much to be risked with a pushy mum!

Btw, any chance of a photo of Bronte? I used to ride a Dales mare, Millie and she made me fall head over hells for the breed! 80)
 
A definate no. Sounds like she doesnt care less about your lovely pony as long as her daughter has fun. God some people :(. Id tell her to find another pony. Youve both been enough already to risk more problems.
 
Sorry have not read all the posts so maybe repeating what others have said.
I would have to cancel the agreement before you even start, her daughter is not yet riding your pony and she is already ignoring what you have said about your pony.
Look at it this way would you forgive yourself if your pony got injured and the vets said it was too much this time and she had to be pts, all because you would not tell the pushy woman NO. I know i am stating worse case here but it could happen, If you do not want to say no to evrything how about just riding your pony in the school when you are around.
If she is not happy with that, say goodbye to the pushy woman and not potentially to your pony.
 
In a word "NO!"
This 'friend' can only see that there is a free pony for her daughter to take to PC camp. She isn't interested in the pony's welfare. I would tell her that you have decided to go ahead and breed from her, so you don't want her to be ridden after all. If you want to be tactful.
I probably wouldn't be tactful in your shoes!
 
she only wants a free pony for her daughter to take to camp, tell her no if she isn't going to listen and respect your ponys limits then its not fair to the pony to put her through that. why is it nearly every PC mum i come across is pushy and insesitive?

xxx
 
Vixen Van Debz said:
If she's being pushy and not listening now, it can only be worse once they actually had Bronte. Some light schooling might be good for your horse, but it has to be with the right person. She's been through too much to be risked with a pushy mum!

Btw, any chance of a photo of Bronte? I used to ride a Dales mare, Millie and she made me fall head over hells for the breed! 80)
Click to expand...

no problem these are some videos of her before the injeries partly the problem


[YOUTUBE]uJzPo98NDC8&feature=mfu_in_order&list=UL[/YOUTUBE]

[YOUTUBE]aQyItyH4bm4[/YOUTUBE][/QUOTE]

she thinks she is going to put her daughter on bronte and get a load of rossets. thank you everyone for your responces defo made my mind up
 
As per other posters..
DONT LET HER GO!!!



Shes lush, dont risk anything happening with her. Let them find a suitable pony for the girl to ride-maybe through the PC? Your girl doesnt need the hassle;)
Having taught at camp-trust me theres always times when the kids are daring eachother over poles and the mare doesnt need that :o
 
Put yourself in Brote's shoes ( all 4 of them ) , you've had a tumour removed from your ovaries . a major shoulder injury and now to cop it all someone is going to push you into PC camp to jump , possibly jarring your shoulders or worse - if something went wrong now you would be kissing goodbye to your foal and her future . I would let her kick up her heels and enjoy life , after all it seems like she's earned it...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top