Pony Club Mums rant - the stereotype is alive and well

Gamebird

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OK so it's a cliche, it's been done a zillion times before and I know that the bad ones today were the exception as the 95% of nice, polite, quiet, well-behaved mothers don't make an impact but......................

Having been sheltered in the comparatively genteel world of BE and BSJA for the last few years I went to some PC SJing today. I can't believe that the PC mum cliche is all true, I thought it was just an over-embelished urban myth
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We had:
1. Hogging practice fence, and actually asking you not to jump it as their daughter was 'working on her uprights at the moment'. Umm, I'll come back in half an hour shall I?
2. Polite kid trying to pass you left to left - mum shouts 'stop nancying around, just barge through'
3. Kid puts in some perfectly nice jumps, mum shouts 'rubbish, awful, come again'
4. Pony peeing off with kid, mum shouts 'you'll never get it round unless you whizz it up a bit first'
5. The inevitable jumping the kid over higher and higher fences (up to about 1.15 for an 85cm class) until honest pony has had enough and jacks it in, mum bawls at kid for not trying hard enough. Kid bursts into tears.
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6. Then leaving practice fence at 1.15 and storming off in a paddy - yup, that'll teach the kid manners.
7. Swearing at kid. Inexcusable.
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8. Refusing (at your OWN Pony Club show) to help alter fences between classes to speed proceedings up, despite frequent polite requests from judging box. Gamebird (who has no affiliation with either the Hunt or PC in question) steps in and helps willingly
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.

And one lovely, lovely mum who quietly had a word with her daughter, said 'jump it 4 or 5 times and NOT bigger than 1m whatever anyone else is jumping and be polite and wait your turn'
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OK, again there were probably some perfectly nice people there today, but they're not the ones I remember
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. I wish I'd have been brought up by one of these mums. I'd have been irrevocably put off horses in my mid-teens, have saved a fortune and had free weekends for the rest of my life!
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PMSL. Sorry, that doesnt help with your pain from today but 'stop nancying around' is hilarious.

I was teaching at pony club once and a girls stirrup leathers had about 2 stitches left holding them together. Mum told kid to get on with it and me not to be so sensitive!

eta- you are much braver than me, i just couldnt go to PC SJ anymore for exactly the reasons you stated! And the fact they ride up your ar*e!
 
I know exactly how you feel. When we have unaff SJ near us the competitions are great until we have the Dengie qualifiers. Then the PC mums are there with their kids on expensive horses that they cant ride and it causes carnage and they are all soooo rude.
My mother was District Commissioner of our ponyclub many years ago and she always said the children are actually ok but it would be better if they were all orphans and didnt have to bring their parents
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It was only ever the parents that caused any trouble.
 
Eek... Although to be completely fair, my OH does nos. 3,4 and 7 of the above when helping me warm up and then gets quite upset when I am mistaken for his child.. He's the Pony Club mother that I never had.

But do we think that harassed children grow up to be harassing mummies or not??!
 
pahahha

My Mum's the DC and thats exacatly what she hates about PC. I was warming up at a PC show, when a horse came passed and nearly missed kicking my leg which i'd recently just recovered from mother said 'don't apologise thats not how you win' i was like 'yeh thats lovley' the lovley kid came back later and said how sorry she was which i thought was lovley!

but all of those points you've made are unfortunatley true
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write to the DC of that pony club or your area commisioner
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usually sorts things out
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and hope you hd a good day
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eta- spaz keyboard
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2 years ago I was scoring at my Mum's PC ODE- it's the irst big one of the year run round proper BE courses going up to 3'9 so it's always very busy. I put up the times and one irate mother came marching up to me demanding why her child had time penalties. I explained she was too slow, only to be told she was NEVER too slow. Eventually after 10 minutes of how I'd ruined her child's life (I was 15, and her daughter was 17!) I asked if she knew what the time and speed was. She didn't.

Hate mum's like that as they give the nice mums a really bad name. Luckily, our PC has lovely mum's who seem to be more focused on not watching their child- far too scary!
 
sounds awful
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i always hate mothers like that, that if their daughter comes out of the arena, pony jumped fab, rode really well...had an unlucky 4 faults or a slower jump off time etc the mums shout at them saying how crap they were...

now i LOVE my mum, even if i go in and get eliminated at 2nd fence
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she will say ''well done, you were really brave!! lovely jump over the first fence, theres always next time'' and it just makes the whole experience more enjoyable!!

i feel so sorry for these kids with there awful parents
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makes me really angry!!
 
On a more random note, I remember one year getting on and realising that I'd left my stick in the car so asked Mum if she could get me my 'pony beater'. I got really disapproving stares from the person next to me!
 
LOL I find that PC mums are my only form of entertainment at shows!
I took Bubs and Ted to a PC show ONCE and only ONCE! I told Bubs that it didn't matter where she came as long as she played fair, didn't bully Ted and they both had fun.
I was then approached by a PC mum and told that with an attitude like that what did I expect her to achieve in the future!
To say I was gobsmacked would be an understatement!
 
Genteel world of BSJA?! Which BSJA have you been to?! I permanently have an issue with people wacking the fence up to ridiclous heights then leaving it at that, and horrendous hogging of the fences. And as for the "grooms" who rush in front of the fence to put it up without glancing to see if you're approaching it... I've yelled at so many people for that! It drives me nuts. As someone who doesn't have a "fence putter-upper", I have to basically hurry my warm up to have a jump whenever the height is vaguelly ok for me. Half the time I can't go near as the fences are left at about 1.15m and I haven't even popped one fence yet...! BE however is way better as they have their max limit clearly marked on the wings, and usually have 3 fences (cross pole, upright and spread) which is a FAR better idea.
 
HeeHee. I went with Horsemad12 to a local EC this morning and we were told off by a PC Mum for jumping too high in the collecting ring. The class was 80cm, the practice fence was...... 80cm.
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I also had to have a small 'discussion' with the person who felt it was appropriate to use my (5yo) mare's bottom as her braking system...... twice
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PC is ALOT worse but have to say..
JRN mothers arent that nice either..

one mother actually said to her daughter the other day 'I cant believe you want to event for a living because riding like that, no one is going to want you to ride their horses.. I've a good mind to withdraw you after that showjumping round."

the girl had 2 poles down.. one infact was a plan that everyone was having down..

I felt awful for her..
 
Oh no, I'm going to a joint PC/RC event tomorrow - now I'm dreading it!! Warm up isn't huge either and my poor mare hates anyone coming up behind her or cantering towards her as she had a "crash" a few years ago apparently. Drat, I forgot to get a red ribbon to try to ward people away from her
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And I'm going on my own for once without OH to help me! Wish me luck!
 
Oh how awful! Those poor kids! I had a similar experience recently, when stewarding at a very low key in hand showing show. Lovely little girl, about 10, doing a super job. Mother kept coming into ring(!) to berate her. I told the judge that the woman was the child's mother and she then asked her to leave the ring.

The worst thing was though...as I was chatting to the child in the line up, all she could say was "I'm really bad at showing, I'm really bad a leading, I'm really bad at running fast enough..." etc. etc. etc. All I could think was, if you grow up normal, it will be a miracle.

Another nasty side effect, was that the poor child, in her frustration, would rag the pony. It was like kicking the cat, I suppose.

What is wrong with these parents?? It's supposed to be fun for the kids!
 
ah the joys of PC mums,,
and the PC mums dont just stick to PC they venture out to BE!
at berrington last year one mother was going balistic that her daughter had time pens, saying she never ever gets time pens and that clearly the, and i quote ''old biddy'' at the start must have messed it up.she went on complaining to everyone here there and everywhere. mouthing off at people who had voulnteered to be there.
in the end i pointed out that lots of people had time penalties, more than usual for an intro, so maybe it was just tightly timed.
i was then shouted at to ''piss off you procotious little prick'' needless to say everyone was shocked!!

furthermore, i saw her again at our PC SJ when i was helping, and guess what she was complaining that she was late in the class.
and then my mum saw her again at another PC ODE, and she was mouthing off to the starter that her daughters time was before my mother (even though my mum had been there for 15mins and she had just arrived) and that she should go first. when the starter said no she said fine i dont like that trakehner at fence so and so anyway, come on we're going home. and draged her child and horse off and buggered off.


STRANGE WOMAN!!!
 
Sorry Gamebird, this made me laugh.
I am a Pony Club mum and a BSJA junior riders mum and if I were to think about where most of these go on around our way, its not Pony Club!
I'll shut up now so I don't get in trouble!!!
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I have very limited experience but I think it depends on the PC and the one Rosie and (therefore) I go to is hugely easy going and friendly with a really good team spirit. The main competition is about who can dish up the best picnic/Pimms rather than whose child is best.
However, some 'junior team hopefuls' Mums (and it was Mums rather than Dads actually) have to be seen to be believed and their kids get given a hard time. The selectors get an even harder time though - I wouldn't be one for anything - the lobbying is intense to say the least.
 
hehe

I did like the PC hunter trial last week, kid on coloured pony which got very excited in warm up. Mother- 'slow down slow down- pony starts to bronk- Mother, kick forwards kick forwards! kid did a great job actually.

I actually think most kids would do a better job if left to their own devices and just learnt by their mistakes. I hate it when they do a round and have a pole and through a tantrum (normally taken out on pony) or parents get stroppy with them. when it really isnt the end of the world!

I often want to tell the parents you get on it and show me you can do better!
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I did think this would have been slightly more controversial than it turned out!

Honestly, the kids were saints and yes, it was a Dengie day!

I just wish more of them knew about passing left to left etc. Perhaps I should haved stayed, BSJA stylee, on the same rein all day?
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Some PC Mums, althouh mental and in the warm up sound like they don't know one end of a horse from another and horrendously pushy, are actually lovely, although mental, mothers who only want their child to do well and have fun. The mothers I really don't like are the ones who bang on about their child's achievements... "and they're only 2 years old doing BE Novice" ...etc. And mother's who keep up with the Jones' by pushing children into bigger and bigger classes because their peers are.

And people who say in a really loud voice because they don't realise I am the person in the ring's sister "They bought that pony ready made." Indeed we did, although she ws green XC and very prone to tantrums which resuted in 2 terrified riders, and as a result A is a far more confident rider taking on the challenge of riding a greenie while your terrfied child is now too scared to contemplate jumping. Nothing wrong with a pony with a bit of age and experience, especially with younger riders.
 
The BSJA mums are worse - walking into the middle of the practice oxer, when you are 3 strides away... Good job Bronson came fitted with a handbrake
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All the Mums (and Dads) at my PC are lovely, as is my Mum. Her crit on Bronson last night at a rally was 'well, he had his head tucked in and he always looks cute anyway. oh, and no one noticed his scabby neck.' (love you mum!)
 
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