Pony Club Mums rant - the stereotype is alive and well

[CrazyMare]

I had a good one - I'd taken a friends horse to BD dressage on a ticket, and taken along another nervy friend too, whose test I promised to call.

There was a mix up and the other horse was in first, then me, but I asked nicely if we could stop, so I could ride, leap off, then call the test.

Woman whose daughter was in next had an eppy fit because 'We are followign the grey, not the bay, and it will throw our working in out', except her test would have been at the same time, whichever order the two horses went into the arena in.

When I came out on the grey she was still berating the steward, dashed in with the bay to call the test, and when we came out, she had stalked off and was trying to thrash their poor horse into a trailer it clearly didn't want to go in!

 

[Divasmum]

I used to be a PC DC and saw just about everything over the years!

 

[brighteyes]

I wouldn't be DC for a million quid.

 

[MagicMelon]

[ QUOTE ]
I wouldn't be DC for a million quid.

[/ QUOTE ]

Me either. Not because of the kids but due to the parents! Although TBH my old PC wasn't a bad one at all, we were a very down to earth club but there were other clubs well known for being a bit terrifying with pushy parents. My mum I think was the perfect PC mum, she wasnt horsey at all when I got my first pony and basically just left me to it. I was 9yrs old but did everything myself, all grooming/tacking up etc. etc. but she was (and still is and I'm now 26!) always there to help and learn herself! She would never have dreamed to tell me off. I learnt myself soon enough when I'd cocked up etc. I think thats something a kid should learn or else they never know what's right and wrong because their parents don't let them figure it out for themselves.

 

[jrp204]

Our PC isn't too bad, we do have a mum who stands at the side of the ring and 'clicks' or shouts at her child (at bsja too) I feel for the child as one day she'll be eliminated for outside assistance because the mother can't keep her mouth shut.
I did once ask to my daughter if i was a 'pushy parent' and she actually laughed, so i did tell her to hit me if i started to become one.
It was very interesting at PC camp though when they had they're final day comp to see the standard of turnout, it showed how many kids actually don't plait or turnout their own ponies. Luckily i am rubbish at plaiting and my daughter has high standards so she would never ask me to do it!

 

[Baggybreeches]

[ QUOTE ]
I wouldn't be DC for a million quid.

[/ QUOTE ]

Haha, our PC couldnt even bribe me to join the comittee!

It has to be said that in my experience PC parents (because I have the fathers being awful too). Really need to lighten up and remember that PC is FUN!

 

[TGM]

[ QUOTE ]
She would never have dreamed to tell me off. I learnt myself soon enough when I'd cocked up etc. I think thats something a kid should learn or else they never know what's right and wrong because their parents don't let them figure it out for themselves.

[/ QUOTE ] Sorry, I have to disagree with that to some extent. We are talking about living, feeling animals here and personally I am not going to let my child learn by her mistakes if it is going to compromise the welfare of her pony in any shape, size or form!

 

[SonnysHumanSlave]

Im going to join PC for my 5 yr old after xmas, shes only on the lead rein!!

I will not turn into one of these mums i promise!

 

[AnShanDan]

I have to say that at least around here Jr. BJSA parents/trainers (often Dads) are far, far worse. PC parents are normally pretty mild mannered and don't say or do much at all at PC show jumping.

All the local PCs run team showjumping comps. which go on all winter, and at these the collecting rings are very well stewarded, everyone behaves themselves!

 

[kerilli]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
She would never have dreamed to tell me off. I learnt myself soon enough when I'd cocked up etc. I think thats something a kid should learn or else they never know what's right and wrong because their parents don't let them figure it out for themselves.

[/ QUOTE ] Sorry, I have to disagree with that to some extent. We are talking about living, feeling animals here and personally I am not going to let my child learn by her mistakes if it is going to compromise the welfare of her pony in any shape, size or form!

[/ QUOTE ]

hear hear to that last comment.

Does anyone else think that these horrible (to their children and everyone else) over-ambitious screaming mums are all really frustrated because they never got anywhere, but in their heads they were better than Pippa, Lucinda G and Mary K all rolled into one?!

 

[OskyWoskyPonio]

I suppose some people live their own dreams through their children when it comes to riding!
I have to say though that in our PC all the mums are lovely

It's not that disimilar to the dad's who stand at the edge of the fotball or rugby pitch screaming at their sons for missing a goal or a tackle!

 

[TURBOBERT]

Oh dear! I was a PC mum - and I dont think I was awful - but you know both my daughters and they will tell you the truth!

 

[ponymum]

Have to agree with Magic Magpie about BSJA. Having attended a few junior BSJA shows as well as PC, I think BSJA have the edge on pushy parents. I saw one girl in tears when her WAG mother was bawling at her for having two poles down. Mind you she has just won HOYS so maybe I'm being too soft on my daughter.....

 

[brushingboots]

i think i know the certian mother you are talking about there ponymum

 

[Shortcut]

Sounds like my mum! LOL

Just kidding We don't get that at our pony club, don't forget some kids can be pretty nasty to their mums, competition nerves and 10 seconds to warm up = snappy, hormonal teenagers! I am 15 and guilty, I have learnt my lesson...

Wasn't there a stable stereotypes in the horse and hound like this thread about a mum with her stop watch?

 

[TableDancer]

Great post, GB, PMSL and I can just imagine your expression

However... *Stands up slowly, looking at the floor, and raises hand*

My name is Tabledancer and I have, in fact, sworn at my daughter

It was, however, in the privacy of our own arena and in my defence I'd had a long hard day of teaching and being nice to clients. T was about 10 and I became particularly frustrated at a certain repeated problem and I found myself screaming at her "What do you think you are? A f*cking amateur??"

I did apologise, and I promise I've never done it since, other than the occasional "bl**dy"

 

[SpottedCat]

[ QUOTE ]
Great post, GB, PMSL and I can just imagine your expression

However... *Stands up slowly, looking at the floor, and raises hand*

My name is Tabledancer and I have, in fact, sworn at my daughter

It was, however, in the privacy of our own arena and in my defence I'd had a long hard day of teaching and being nice to clients. T was about 10 and I became particularly frustrated at a certain repeated problem and I found myself screaming at her "What do you think you are? A f*cking amateur??"

I did apologise, and I promise I've never done it since, other than the occasional "bl**dy"

[/ QUOTE ]

I am actually crying with laughter at that image! Poor T!! I am also a bit scared of bringing B to see you now....although my answer would, of course, be 'yes, and not a very good one either, so tell me what to do!'

 

[Shrimp]

Ah dont even get me started! Was one of the reasons I left pony club. My mum was great with me but others were terrible. At our ODE this year, I was scoring and we had a great production line going were getting through the scores really efficiently but there was still one mother who came in the lorry which was parked against a hedge hoping nobody would get in asking where the dressage sheets were, bearing in mind the class was nowhere near finished! Mum put on her official 'dont annoy me' voice and told her to get out

Also when writing the scores up, quite often you'd get the mothers hovering over your shoulder which really p***es me off so I tell the to bugger off back a bit and wait untill im done. Or they moan loudly near you so that you can hear them but they often dont expect you to answer them, well I always think its polite to set them right. The looks on their faces can be rather amusing...

 

[susan_w]

We should get H&H to re-run the PC mum stereotype sketch. So true.

I regularly judge PC SJ comps, and am no longer surprised by the parents behaviour. I've had more parents in the judging box, than you can imagine. Questioning my timing, my faults given, you name it. I'm also a BSJA judge, and regularly see the pony parents in the judges box too - the only thing I've ever told my daughter (and many since her), is doesn't matter how many faults, how badly your round has gone, come out of the ring patting your horse/pony and smiling. People will respect you far more for it than the brat attacks that you regularly see.

And now I've just remembered I've got PC jumping next week (with a Dengie) to look forward to. Thanks for the post - made me smile.

 

[punk]

Dear, dear Shortcut - what a lovely way to look at it!!!

Quote
Sounds like my mum! LOL
Just kidding We don't get that at our pony club, don't forget some kids can be pretty nasty to their mums, competition nerves and 10 seconds to warm up = snappy, hormonal teenagers! I am 15 and guilty,I have learnt my lesson...

I have read this thread, and have been trying to remember if I ever said anything within earshot of others, that might be construed as 'pushy' mum.

But there are times when patience is pushed to the limit -- imagine the scenario.....
You have got up at 4.3O - to re-wash the lovely grey pony who has wriggled out of all the bandages and rugs and then rolled (probs too hot!!). You find its plaits are all rubbed out (actually maybe just the same as the ones put in the night before!!!). Your little darling is still sleeping as she has to be fresh for the competition (very tired after watching the late night show on TV).

You finish all that, wake said child, make breakfast, and the packed lunch, rewake said child, hitch up trailer, load pony, get child(who is now wide awake and very excited) into car - and finally -----set off --- usually running late!!!

NOW make that 3 children and 3 grey ponies...............

Can you blame said mother for being a little stressed out later on???!!!

Not necessarily 'pushy' but definitely tired!!!

All very tongue in cheek

but don't forget the stresses of being a PC Mum!

BTW - My own children were all little angels who did everything for themselves and their ponies

Thank you again Shortcut - for putting the 'other' side!!!

Now ..... don't get me started on PC committee members - who sometimes let that little bit of 'power' go to their heads!!!

(Still tongue in cheek as I have been there too!!!

)