Pony/horse/son dilemma

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DJ

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My son used to ride a few years ago, he started when he was about 4, and then we got him his own pony. He was having lessons at our (then) local riding school.

One day he came home from school and everything had changed, he point blank wanted nothing to do with the horses/ponies anymore. I can only guess he`d said something about his pony at school and he`d been ridiculed by the other kids/boys?? ... Any how time went on and he would not help me with mine either, his pony went on loan to a local family for their children to learn on (still there now) and it got to the point he loathed helping me at all.

I then had a very bad riding accident a couple of years ago, and the decision was made to have a break from horses completely whilst my broken bones healed. I had the use of a lovely mare for last summer to help get me riding again, but my son again wasn`t interested at all.

Earlier this year I bought a youngster, and my son actually took an interest in him (my son is now in high school). He then started asking me questions about riding, and asked if he could have lessons again. So I took him to our now local stables and he took to it all like a duck to water. He`s happy in walk and trot, doing small jumps, hacking out, and is just learning to canter, and again is taking that in his stride. Not only does he go to the "club" they run on a Saturday, he asks me to drop him there any other spare time he has, and he`s been helping out to earn rides too, and by all accounts, he`s really doing himself proud.

He`s been riding the 14.2/15hh horse/ponies, and he`s ridden a friends stallion too 15.1hh, and tbh he didn`t look out of place on them. He`s 12 years old and as tall as me now (5ft 3 ish), but he`s growing like a weed. I`m having to replace his clothes every 3 months or so at the moment, and most of the males in our family are 6ft minimum, so I know he`s going to be tall.

I have the chance of my own field locally, and they are like gold dust round here, so I`m definitely going to take it. I have a companion pony already (doing a friend a favour) so we`re in no rush, but we have been discussing the option of getting our son a horse of his own.

But what to do? Am I better off getting a safe as houses pony, and then look to move that one on when he`s ready (I know these are always in demand so would have no trouble selling on) or do I get something a bit bigger and let him learn alongside the lessons he`s having (we`d take his horse through to the riding school for his lessons). He does choose the bigger/speedy ponies at the riding school, and where I want to protect/moddycoddle/wrap him in bubble wrap (lol) I think he`d get bored quite quickly with the type I have in mind for him.

Anyone who has been in a similar position I`d love to hear what you did and how it worked out for you? Chocolate and nibbles for anyone who got this far :)
 
when i was a kid that age part of the draw was going to yard and hanging around with the gang that was there. Will he still have contact with them when you get the field? Or will he only be up for the lesson?

My parents got me a bigger horse when i was younger and i loved it as i was brave as a kid. I used to find the quieter smaller ones boring.
 
Personally I'd try to find one for loan. That way if things change pony can go back.

As for what type I would think that with a safe as houses type you have more chance of him being bored so I'd probably look for something with experience but not a plod - something capable of stepping up a gear.
 
He is obviously enjoying being at the yard, so be careful if you get him his own horse if you intend to keep it at this new field. Would he then miss the whole social scene of being at a yard?

I know you intend taking the horse to the riding school for lessons, but that is not the same as being at the yard all the time, and would there then be pressure for him to spend more time at your field with his horse? I keep my horses at home but I do miss the buzz of being at a yard.

As to what to buy, he already has the option of safe ponies at the riding school, so I would be tempted to buy something bigger that has more ability long term, although it must still of course be sane! Or just leave him at the riding school to progress, and wait until he is begging you to buy him something.

It is so tricky with boys, we have several in our Pony Club and their mothers have to get it right with the type of horse etc - they are much quicker to throw the towel in. It is so much easier with girls, I have to say :)
 
Does he need another horse/pony, has he actually asked for one? I'd be tempted to keep him at the riding school - he gets to ride a variety and also probably enjoys the social aspect of it and that makes the working fun too. It's quite a bit different to being on your own doing chores in a muddy field and then having to ride by yourself and he might get bored again...
 
My teenage step son just informed me out of the blu he doesn't want up ride anymore. Loved it as a kid, stopped for a while and came back to it as a teen. Luckily the only loss is the hat, boots, breeches etc. So glad I never bought him a pony!
 
Yes, sorry forgot to add he is nagging the living daylights out of me for one of his own, and yes he`d still be going to the riding stables as he normally goes there when I`m working (his choice) and that won`t change :)
 
If he is now at High School, it may well be that the draw of the riding school is the number of teenage girls he comes into contact with there :p. Unless he is asking for his own horse, I would not be looking to buy one for him, but would leave him at the RS where he can be the "token male", just think how he can show off his strength moving bales and heavy wheelbarrows, all of which would be to no audience at your own field :D
 
YorksG said:
If he is now at High School, it may well be that the draw of the riding school is the number of teenage girls he comes into contact with there :p. Unless he is asking for his own horse, I would not be looking to buy one for him, but would leave him at the RS where he can be the "token male", just think how he can show off his strength moving bales and heavy wheelbarrows, all of which would be to no audience at your own field :D
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That really made me laugh lolol ... He`s actually a really shy sensitive type bless him, quiet, and goes beetroot red at the drop of a hat, I`m not allowed to speak when I pick him up from the stables :D .

See the post just above, yes he`s nagging me for one of his own, has been doing since about February, I`ve been saying no to him, but he`s working so hard bless him. If I didn`t have this field, it wouldn`t have been on the cards tbh, but I`m thinking I`ll leave him using the riding stables for a bit longer and see what happens. Still having the same dilemma about size of horse, but I suppose I won`t know until he starts trying them out as he has to click with them regardless of size.

Madlady that`s definitely an option, either loan or lwvtb, Thanks :)
 
From the standard you say he's at I'd look to loan or buy a sturdy big cob so as your son grows it will take up his leg and he won't out grow it too quickly. While you certainly don't want to over horse him you don't want something so steady he's bored as that could make him loose interest - a nice active cob could well fit the bill.
 
You didn't mention that vital piece of information earlier - I take it all back. If he is nagging you to get one, what are you waiting for?! You have a boy who wants to ride, it is your duty to find him a horse :)

Go for it, just get a decent one so he doesn't lose interest/confidence. Obviously that is easier said than done.
 
Get one you like and let him ride it. Win win ;). That's what I've done with my daughter. Everything she rides from now on is actually mine and I want to have it :D
 
As above, a good cob could be the right choice, but I don't mean some plod, I would be thinking more Irish sort around
14.2 ish with a bit of quality that has been well schooled - not some poor ill bred scrub pony. Some cobs can be surprisingly speedy and handy and jump well.
 
DJ said:
That really made me laugh lolol ... He`s actually a really shy sensitive type bless him, quiet, and goes beetroot red at the drop of a hat, I`m not allowed to speak when I pick him up from the stables :D ........
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Ah but you know what they say about the quiet ones. And of course you're not allowed to speak to him when you pick him up....come on mum...you know the rules! My nephew was in size 9 shoes at 13, 5'9'' at 14, at 16 he had a beard! he's just turned 18 and he's now 6' 1''.

I'd go with a loan wvtb too, something sane and sensible but with a bit of poke and around 15.2hh.
 
Thank you all for the replies, certainly food for thought. I have toyed with the idea of having another for me, but I do have my hands full with my youngster, and I do want him to really feel that said horse/pony is actually his, though if he does decide to get bored of it all, at least I`ll have another one LOL. The riding school doesn`t loan, so that isn`t an option. His horse/pony could go live there, but it`d working livery (quite expensive) which I can`t warrant paying when I have my own grazing, and then I`d have to pay his lessons on top. Plus it`s a fair way from where we live (it`s only down the road from where I work, that`s why he goes there).

Things are getting serious now though ... I just nipped in his bedroom to get his washing and found this on his chest of drawers:

13259996_10208584839792191_8047079146965578569_n_zpsxpyxlnzb.jpg


I think he`s fallen for it hook line and sinker !!!!
 
LOL! Good for him :-)
When I started learning at my Yard the owner said "Yes, we have male clients too" but I've never seen one.
Luckily the women there don't bite.
 
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