'Poor Kids'

navaho said:
Was there a reason given for him not recieving CB for his eldest, i have 2 over 16 & i still recieve CB & tax credits for both, though they are both in college. If he wasnt receiving CB for the child then he wouldnt have been getting tax credits for them either. Im kind of wishing id watched this now.
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I think there was some kind of cock-up with his benefits IIRC.

My OH grew up in similar circumstances...he hates his mother- not for being poor, but for the squalor and lack of any sort of standards. He left home aged 16 and never went back. Whilst I was getting upset watching the programme last night, OH was pointing out that there was no need for the carpets or kids to be so grimy.....

Did make me think though...about how much you take for granted. I wish I'd made my kids watch it. My daughters idea of deprived is someone not having their own pony:o

Agree also that we should reduce our foreign aid policy and start looking much much closer to home.
 
I watched this too, and it was just so desperately sad. It makes me sick that there are people like this out there, genuninely struggling, and there are benefit cheats out there all give all people on benefits a bad name. I have to say though, I think the girl in Glasgow will go places, I don't know what it was about her, but just her outlook was amazing.

I also thought the kids 'rich' friends were nice kids, and didn't make them feel bad for being poor, puts some of us adults to shame I think :(

That girl in bradford? I just want to adopt her and buy her a pony :o I know thats not a great solution, but I would love to do something like that, horses really do help people I think, just being around them is very therapeutic. :)
 
DragonSlayer said:
This programme is moving me to tears.....

I want to send Sam my sons clothes that he has outgrown, I want to buy him a new uniform with proper boys shirts and trousers that fit....

So many of us come on here and bicker about how tough life is....but for the 3.5 million kids who live below the poverty line, I think we need to get a grip.....

Where can I find out how to help Sam???

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
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Agreed - broke my heart and that poor little girl in bradford - noticed her mum could afford stupidly long and glaring false nails though!!!!!:mad:
 
darkhorse123 said:
Agreed - broke my heart and that poor little girl in bradford - noticed her mum could afford stupidly long and glaring false nails though!!!!!:mad:
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Yeah...my eagle-eyed OH noticed that too....

I for one have been guilty of moaning about people claiming benefits....and I actually felt rather ****** about myself after watching that......I agree with Stencilface- those benefit cheats who 'rake it in' give genuine claimants like last night a bad name.
 
in fact i think that little girl in bradford has more to deal with then just beign poor - her "care" was appalling - did you see how she put the cream on her poorly legs sat on a filthy step in her back garden!
Agree with someone else who said beign clean, tidying up and gettign rid of rubbish costs nothing. The other families were genuine but I could have slapped that poor little girls mum leaving her kids so dirty - that scene of her sat on the garden step with her legs bleeding surrounded by filth and rubbish was appalling
 
darkhorse123 said:
in fact i think that little girl in bradford has more to deal with then just beign poor - her "care" was appalling - did you see how she put the cream on her poorly legs sat on a filthy step in her back garden!
Agree with someone else who said beign clean, tidying up and gettign rid of rubbish costs nothing. The other families were genuine but I could have slapped that poor little girls mum leaving her kids so dirty - that scene of her sat on the garden step with her legs bleeding surrounded by filth and rubbish was appalling
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I'd forgotten about that :(

Having very bad eczema myself for many years (now sorted thanks to diet changes) those bits made me want to cry, putting cream on eczema is agony, putting cream on eczema on dirty skin is torture :(

I am not a 'kid' person, and I have never felt this way about someone on tv like this before. I feel like I want to contact the local BBC and see what I can do.
 
Am not surprised over the level of poverty in this country - for some reason, the government (and all the other ones have been the same) seem to think that giving money to other countries which are sometimes corrupt is going to help world peace! :eek::eek: What lala planet are they on? :confused::confused:

Charity definitely begins at home, I do feel sorry for these poor kids and the poverty they are facing, I know through my work that a lot of families on benefits seem to have a hell of a lot more gadgets, clothes and food than those of us who work to support them, some (a minority) are far better off on benefits as the pay they would get through employment is non existent. I know I will get shot down in flames for the next comment, IF you are having problems paying bills and are unable to get a job WHY HAVE MORE KIDS!!!! I appreciate that many families are left in the lurch big time with family break down and redundancy etc.

Friend of mine grew up in a leaky caravan on a scrap heap in the 70s - no child benefits back then - am glad things have moved on. They only way forward is to teach people how to budget and cook and look after themselves and their living quarters, unfortunately until these things have been sorted out, there are always going to be poor children living in squalour, someone needs to take them under their wing and show them what it is like to budget, cook etc so that they can then teach their children, how can you teach your kids something that you have never been taught. What we need are parenting skills.

On a different vein, has anyone seen how some of our elderly are treated, crikey some of the places I have been into I wouldn't expect a dirty rat to live in and most of them have paid their taxes etc in the past.
 
Eeyore that was very similar to what I said, so sad isn't it for the innocent kiddies.

The breakdown of extended families and those living so far apart the support networks are being lost as are the skills of mothering :(

I am still racking my brain as to how I can help :( asked OH if we could foster or even take a few for Country hols?
 
My husband grew up very poor. I mean abject poverty. He often had inadequate food and his clothes were all hand-me-downs from one of his seven brothers. He educated himself whilst working full-time and now is a high earner and highly educated - a couple of years ago he bought my mother in law a house CASH. He knows the value of money and never takes anything for granted. Being poor is nothing to be ashamed of but staying poor is.
 
millreef said:
How much did it cost to feed that enormous dog??????
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Probably quite a lot, but this is taken from Jezza Neumann who shot the documentry:

"..Why, for example, does Fran have a dog when she struggles to feed the kids?

"For my family's security," she said. "Do you know what it's like living on an estate alongside drug addicts?"

No, I don't, thank God.

The kids used to have bikes but they were taken from the garden. She also recounts a story about strangers breaking into the house.

That's why, as a single mum with three vulnerable young girls, she has a dog. I was then embarrassed I'd asked the question.... "
 
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Ok I must have seen something else, the 3 computers, the two tv, the ps3 which was used to view the Internet, no matter how little money you have u can still wash and keep your house and chidden clean and tidy. As it said at the start these families are on 1000 a month, if on income support rent and council tax would be paid, ok the man he was not getting cb for one child a total of £50 a month. I sat and watched this today my head was in my hands, the mum of the three kids should get of her bum and get a job, put her children in care she get 70 percent off the state. I would never let my children out on the street like those girls. Tbh social services should be called in on that women. Life is tight for all of us, just some can deal better than others.
 
Makes you realise how lucky you have it really.

What I kept thinking throughout was about the people who live on the same estate as me on benefits. They are in their dressing gown at lunchtime having their 20th fag of the day hungover from the night before.

Why is the council giving money for people to spend smoking and boozing when it could be given to people like those off this programme.

Also if they were that poor why did they have 3 TVs a computer and video games?
 
I didn't watch the programme, but reading this thread has made a bit emotional. I grew up like that, people think I'm making it up if I've ever mention my childhood. No heating or electricity, we had a coal fire but couldn't afford coal, and an electric heater but no money to buy electric cards. Never much food, always hungry. No hot water and rarely any soap to wash anyway. No ASDA or budget supermarket then, charity shop clothes if we were lucky, sometimes catalogue clothes then hiding from the bailiffs for not paying for them. No tv, sod all tbh, but we had pets, lots of pets and I loved them. I can remember 1 winter mum having enough money for a bag of coal from the shop in the village, we walked down, 1 mile through the snow and dragged a bag home between us. We must've stank at school and been the kids everyone laughed at, behind my back though cos I was tough and would've slapped anyone who took the mickey out of me. It is easier now, budget supermarkets everywhere, cheap clothes easy to buy and the benefits system is a different ballgame now. No excuse for any child to be dirty.
 
millreef, my husband also grew up extremely poor, similar situation as yours, used to work as a paper boy and lend the money to his parents for food. He has worked very hard to be succesful. I also grew up in a family with not much money, I remember my dad bringing home abandoned cars and fixing them up to drive.
 
Saying that this program was sad, but did you spot the nintendo ds' the tvs and other items; ive just come back from tanzania and these guys in comparison are rich. They dont have the money for food and will go for days without food, no free education (they cant afford the £5- £10 a year for school fees, and some people give their kids up for adoption for them to have a better life) these kids are still a lot better off, although saying that not the greatest way to live and i wouldnt like to be in their position anyday, and am so glad im not. it didnt upset me because ive seen the damn real meaning of poverty
 
fornema said:
Saying that this program was sad, but did you spot the nintendo ds' the tvs and other items; ive just come back from tanzania and these guys in comparison are rich. They dont have the money for food and will go for days without food, no free education (they cant afford the £5- £10 a year for school fees, and some people give their kids up for adoption for them to have a better life) these kids are still a lot better off, although saying that not the greatest way to live and i wouldnt like to be in their position anyday, and am so glad im not. it didnt upset me because ive seen the damn real meaning of poverty
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Of course there are countries who's children are in a far worse situation, but it still doesn't get away from the fact that these kids are suffering and they are on our doorstep. I agree that there is no excuse for them being dirty, but quite often the parents have mental health problems due to their predicament, their own upbringing etc and often quite simply don't know how to parent. There are various agencies within councils to help with effective parenting. I just wonder how many are being picked up by social services.
I think it is easy to judge and also question what they do with their benefits, but you just don't know what their debts are etc. or what issues are underlying.
As for those wondering about helping little sam, I am sure there are lot's of 'little sams' around the country and maybe not living too far away from any one of us. Maybe getting involved with a youth group on a vountary basis in a deprived area would be something that some might think about.

As for outgrown clothes and toys, I don't put any in the bags provided by some of these charities that ask for clothes for the reasons stated in another post. I give all my stuff to the womens rescue. Some of these women are doing a runner in the middle of the night with their children to escape violence. They often leave with nothing and are having to start again. I always make sure that toys are clean and in good order and clothes washed and ironed. I know that sounds like common sense but i know that some people hand things in in a rubbish state.
 
I think the dad on the programme with all the TVs etc would have bought them whilst he was still working, and still able to pay for them. Now he was stuck with them and not able to afford them.

Regardless of the action of the adults though, it really isn't right that kids in a rich country like ours are brought up in these kind of conditions is it. :(
 
Usual BBC story-Kids suffering due to poor housing and no jobs ,No mention of the piles of fags,sky + box and 50" plasma tv on the wall!!, the kids are suffering but they're looking in the wrong place for the problem.......
 
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People in my work were talking about this, have not seen myself, made me feel down, its made people want to help not only the kids on here but others in the same position.
Hope the programme makes a diffrence.
 
This is so sad - anyone know who I would contact to give kids like this a day out at the stables? I have a lovely wee shetland with Lumi who would adore the love and attention kids like that would bring.

I wasnt as poor as these kids but my mum struggled like HE'LL when I was little and I never had the best gear etc - but it was people who gave me ponies to ride and helping out at te riding school that gave me the chance to get started in te horse world. I'd love to give back!
 
soltydog said:
Not just feeding it, that dog was an american bull dog they are £700.00 plus to buy!!!!

Sure that money could be better spent and the cost of having her nails done!
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Thats funny.. my American bulldog cost me a donation of £150 from a rescue :rolleyes:
 
navaho said:
Yes, but in fairness its doubtful any rescue would rehome to one of these familes
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Agreed. Not so much the point I was trying to make though.. more that, we really dont know all the circumstances surrounding these families..

It was my attempt to show that, no matter what the situation, all may not be as it seems..
 
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We don't know the background on these families. The mother with the three girls was married until two or three years ago, the husband may have been working and they may have had funds to purchase the dog back then.

The father of Sam was working previously, again, he could have purchased TV's and games consoles when he was in employment, although I must admit I would have sold them to put food on the table if I had to.
 
MrsElle said:
We don't know the background on these families. The mother with the three girls was married until two or three years ago, the husband may have been working and they may have had funds to purchase the dog back then.

The father of Sam was working previously, again, he could have purchased TV's and games consoles when he was in employment, although I must admit I would have sold them to put food on the table if I had to.
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Very true, but I should think that, if I was ever in that situation.. I would desperately want my child to have some of the luxuries that other 'normal' children had - for no reasons other than to help make him feel like his friends and to ease my (probably unreasonabley) guilty conscience for not providing him with the life that he should be having..

I should think I would try to sell everything else under the sun, before I had to tell my child he could no longer have the one thing that he has left to enjoy playing with.
 
I only watched part of this programme as like some others have said it seemed to be the usual BBC story that only shows part of the picture.

I was brought up by my mother who was on benefits until she managed to qualify as a secretary and get a job. I am talking about 30+ years ago and I think benefits were even harder to live on then.
I had shoes that didn't fit, the majority of my clothes were hand me downs from my cousins, I never had expensive toys and one of my best presents was a desk made by a neighbour for me at christmas who felt sorry for me. I can remember having visitors for tea one day and having to have bread and butter and passing a tin of condensed milk around to spread on it as that was all we had! It was passed round withh great good humour though and we all had a lovely time.

BUT - I did have a reasonably happy childhood, I was always clean, the house was immaculate and I was taught good manners etc. I certainly wouldn't have been allowed to rail around derelict properties like the children in the film.

I look at families today who bemoan the hard life that they have, but money is still found for items that tbh I would consider 'luxury'. At the end of the day it is the children that suffer, while parents often still make sure they get their cigarettes, alcohol, tv's etc. Children being fed shop bought sausage rolls etc for meals when you could make a pan of broth or similar for probably the same price that would last longer and be more nutritious. Priorities are all wrong in today's consumer society. We always seem to look at what we haven't got and not what we have.

As for owning a large dog for protection, I'm sorry but even if it was 'only' £150 it would be better off spent elsewhere, I've never paid for a dog in my life and have had plenty.

It is possible to better yourself and remove yourself from poverty, and there are plenty of people who have done just that. I hate this 'poor me' syndrome that this country seems to have developed where we all feel terribly sorry for the children (rightly so) but the parents sit and moan about how hard life is without actually doing anything to change things, yet they expect society to provide for their children and make sure that they have everything while they sit back and do nothing. The best way out of poverty is hard work and many people seem unprepared to do that.

Being poor should never equate to a bad upbringing and slovenly living conditions. It may well make things more difficult, but certainly manageable and I wonder that even if there was more money thrown at these families if things would be much different to be honest.

The thing that gets me more is things like the rise in university tuition fees. Nine thousand pounds a year of debt is going to stop many of these children aiming for university and bettering themselves which is shame as some of them will have potential which is wasted.
 
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I live in an area where there are unfortunately a few families living like this. We have high unemployment & crime & there are a lot of drug users in the town. I can understand why they have no money left after paying utilities as a lot borrow money for Xmas etc, but then end up paying it back over a very long time. Over the school holidays the local swimming baths were full of kids everyday as they got free swimming sessions. This has now been stopped, so they have lost that enjoyment. I always pass on my kids clothes to other families not charity shops, as a few of their friends are very grateful for them. It just really winds me up when I see these kids with clothes that don't fit, but the parents find the money for cigs! One woman I know was very happy for her child to cycle home 4 miles from school down an unlit very busy country road with no lights on her bike in the winter as she couldn't afford the bus fair but she always had a pack of fags in her pocket.
 
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