PTS - how do I know whether to stay with him?

D

DD265

Well-Known Member
Joined
12 April 2013
Messages
761
Visit site
It seems that I'm facing this sooner rather than later as I feel D is showing signs of a sore back/his arthritis deteriorating even on 2 bute a day.

I would prefer to use a bullet, rather than an injection. I've watched a video of each on YouTube and I've seen a horse shot first hand (from a distance) which I think has the potential to be more upsetting for the owner but less so for the horse. My primary reason is that my boy hates being sedated. I've never been under general anesthetic myself but I believe it's supposed to be like going off to sleep and I don't think he'd like that.

I promised him I'd stay until the end but now I'm not so sure. For all that I am ready to move on I'm already crying now, and I don't know whether it's better for him to have me there or whether my being upset would make things worse. We've been together 12 years and are very close, so my emotions affect him greatly.

How did you decide what to do? Did anybody regret their decision, either way?
 
Honestly if bullet i wouldn't be there, I was there twice with a friend, you have to stand away for safety reasons and the noise will stay with me, found it v traumatic both times. Not saying I wouldn't use the bullet, horse doesn't know anything about it.

If you want to stay use injection but there is no shame in not staying, I am prob going with injection for old mare when time comes and I will stay but if it was bullet I would make sure I was out of earshot (you will need to be long wag away as v loud) X
 
Oh gosh, this is awful for you.

There is a group called "Horsey Buddies" or "Friends at the End" or something similar. My understanding is that these people are experienced around the whole PTS scenario, and will volunteer to be there with your horse, at the end, if you cannot face being there yourself. Because they are strangers who do know necessarily know the horse, they can remain detached from the situation they are able to remain calmer and be less upset than the owner would be. I wish I could remember the name of them - hopefully someone else on here will know? Think BHS might know. They have to be truly dedicated people to do what they do. Alternatively you may know a friend or someone who can fulfil this role for you. This would apply whichever method of PTS you decide upon.

Your options, if you decide to go for shooting, are either the hunt, or licensed slaughterman. Both can be relied upon to provide a professionally detached yet compassionate service but there will be health and safety concerns re. you being very near the horse as it is actually PTS. IME, on these occasions, the owner would normally be invited to say their farewells to their horse; after which it will be gently suggested that it might be an appropriate time for the owner to go some place else, preferably out of earshot if possible, after which they will get on and do the job.

Personally my choice would be to leave at this stage and not want to return to the horse after the deed has been done. Better to remember the horse as it was rather than the last memory be an upsetting one.

Also you really don't want to stay around for the loading-up and taking away of the carcass, it is never a pleasant task whether PTS by lethal injection or gun - and again the professionals would normally be gently and unobtrusively ushering the owner away at this time.

So so sorry you're having to face this OP. But as you have obvious apprehensions about lethal injection and whether it would be right for your horse, it just might be worth having a chat with your vet to see if some of your fears about this method of PTS can be allayed.
 
Last edited:
I have stayed with a few of horses who were shot & I don't think it's all that bad.
It was Mick from The Grafton, I always ask him where he wants me to stand, he tells me to stand behind his left shoulder & I either turn my back or close my eyes so I've never seen the actual shot.
He has a plastic sack which he quickly puts over the head to collect the blood.
BUT the loading into the truck is horrible - do not stay for that, I've stayed while friends horses are loaded but never for my own.
There's no shame in not wanting to be there, I have always stayed with my own horses and have stayed with horses whose owners couldn't face it, I don't judge them for it.
 
I'd stay, but leave as soon as the deed is done - then you are there to talk to him before and wont regret not being with him.
 
I remember the sound of the shot before - we were maybe 200m away down the bridleway. I think what gets me more is the way the horse kind of shot into the air and somersaulted a couple of times (the land isn't flat, which doesn't help). I didn't see the horse being loaded although I confess from a distance I did try to see a little as I wanted to understand. In some ways it may have been better if I hadn't seen the somersault, as although I understand why it happened I don't know whether I'll be able to rationalise it if the same happens with D.

It is Friends at the End, but I also know several people who I'm sure would stay with him if I couldn't. I think with the previous horse, the owner wasn't at the yard at all and YO took the horse to the field, then left it with the knackermen (there were two) who held and shot respectively. The horse was eating so I don't think it noticed YO leaving, whereas I think D is more likely to watch me go even if he is stuffing his face with dairy grass.

I believe that he'll know what's going to happen, because he'll pick it up from me as well so that's not really helping my decision. My gut is telling me that once he's gone he's gone, but I know I won't stay to see the body being taken away. Whilst i'm ready to move on, I've also started grieving I think which in a way is good because I may have come to terms with it before. It's just whether I stay for the actual deed and I have a feeling that might be an on-the-day-of decision, but experiences are helping thank you.
 
OP, try Friends at the End run by the BHS.
You will find a compassionate person, who will be able to talk things through with you and can also be there when the day comes.

For what its worth, I've held quite a large number to be PTS by both methods, only the once have I had to leave one of my own - this was a cheery cobby - and I removed myself immediately. The knackerman understood and just took the rope off me and did the deed as I walked away.
Its not a shaming thing to walk away, we all have that one day when things wont work the way we want to.

Sending you a big hug xx

edit: I have never seen any horse somersault with a bullet pts, they usually drop to one or the other side, sometimes they drop backwards onto their hocks. Just about all I have held have been accepting of stuffing face and the nice man scratching their face in a friendly manner, only one required sedation but that is a completely different book as there was major trauma to the horse prior to pts.
 
Last edited:
When my boy was PTS by the vet after surgery i decided not to stay. I was an emotional wreck and as much as I wanted to be there it wouldn't have been fair to the horse or those people around whilst the deed was done. I said my goodbyes as best I could and left. Hubby took me home. Later he returned to collect him & bury him on the farm, but I didn't want to see him.
A few weeks ago we had one of the cows shot on farm it was a loud crack & that was all. However I am sure with a horse it would be more distressing as one tends to be more attached.
Only you will know what to do, my advice is if you are at all unsure then don't stay.
 
If it's any consolation, my lad was very fearful of injections, but we managed to put him to sleep in June via injection, with very little trauma at all. He was sedated first, and stepped away once when the vet tried to inject him, but once the sedation was in he was completely zonked and then had no idea what was coming next. I stayed with him and watched him go down really peacefully. This is the 3rd I've had done by injection and I found it minimally traumatic.
 
I recently had my best horse done by bullet. I always thought I would be there at the end but actually when it came to it I couldn't, so walked him to the spot handed him over and drove away. I've never regretted it.
 
I have had 2 horses pts recently. Both by injection, I personally couldn't bear the thought of a gun. One I stayed for one I didn't. First one I stayed for was at home. I had stayed with him all day in the stable. He had been very calm all day and mostly so was I. When the vet arrived He was heavily sedated and I led him out of his stable. He had no idea what was happening after that point. I was calm until that point. I turned away when the actual injection went in (well in fact I cried uncontrollably with my friend hugging me) and only turned back round once he was on the ground. The vet gave him the injection and took the lead rope from me. I actually am not sure I would do this again as all I can see now is him gone on the ground.

The other was after that. However he had been an inpatient at the vets for almost 3 weeks. I got the call and went to see him to say goodbye. However he was distressed and in pain, despite having been given meds to help. I didn't feel I could be calm for him so I said goodbye and left and the vets did it very shortly afterwards. I felt me being distressed would have made matters worse and that he knew the vets and nurses there with him.
 
Nowadays huntsmen are (generally) more experienced at dispatching by bullet than vets; I would therefore ALWAYS use my local hunt if this was my preferred method.

I have always been able to hold the said horse on a headcollar with a bowl of food under his nose whilst the deed is done. The horse drops and I will wait until the muscle spasms etc have ceased, talking to the horse just in case (but more for my benefit than his) and then walk away and leave the loading to the professionals.
 
One of my best friends held my horse whilst he was shot. I said good bye to him in the morning and remembered him looking straight at me with his ears pricked and his mouth full of grass. Still makes me sob even typing this. He was done by bullet and I don't regret not being there for one minute. But I am incredibly grateful that my friend was there to headcollar him and walk him the five metres to where he was put down so that he was with someone he knew.
 
I looked at D last night and somehow I just know that I'll find the strength to be there. I will let myself be guided by the knackerman but I'll stay as long as they'll let me. :(
 
I agree with scats. I had my horse PTS with injection and I cuddled him until the end. He was very relaxed and peaceful. After he'd gone I sobbed my heart out. My yard owner covered him up and arranged for Cherry Tree farm to take his body (I did not want to be there for that part). It's a very personal choice but I wanted to stay until I was sure he was gone. Either way, it's very sad, but that would be my choice again..... xx
 
I wouldn't stay for a horse to be shot, but I would (and did) for the injection - it was very peaceful and quick. I think I'd be traumatised watching PTS via gun, and you have to ask yourself who gains from you going through the experience. If the horse isn't particularly worried about strangers, and the person handling the gun is experienced then the horse won't know what is going on and won't be any more worried than if a stranger led it somewhere to feed and pet. In fact, an emotional owner might signal that something is up. So personally, I don't really think the horse is missing out on something crucial by not spending the last minute with the owner, but the owner may well carry around a very traumatic event for the rest of their lives. I'm not one for guilt trips, so I don't feel I need to put myself through that as some sort of punishment or payment for having my horse PTS when the time is right.
In the end, it's definitely a very personal choice. Sorry that you have to go through it soon.
 
I've had both "versions". Injection was because it was an emergency and the vet was there and I actually found it more stressful, but I think that's more because of the circumstances than the actual act. 2nd time was planned and was done by the chap who provides the horse ambulance at events round here and he was so lovely and gentle and sympathetic. I had it done in the field by the gate, he said to leave the rugs on as he didn't want the horse to think anything particular was happening, I gave the horse a big bucket of carrots and apples, his friends were on the other side of the electric fence and he knew absolutely nothing, for him without doubt it was the best. I was told to stand back and look away and then told when I could look if I wanted as he'd stopped moving. The knackerman gave me a big hug, told me to remember the good times and then go for a long walk - he let the other horses in to the field so they could see and by the time I got back 30 minutes later it was all done.

It's horrible whichever way you go, but I would say they're equally humane methods, you know your horse and what both he and you can cope with. In many ways the lead up to the decision and the actual day rather than the deed itself are the hardest things to handle. Whatever you do will be right by the horse, it's hard and I'm sorry you have to deal with it.
 
I have had horses pts by both methods and much prefer the bullet, both from the horse's POV and my own, as those who have had to have injection, because vet was already there had far more of a reaction and took longer to die.
Most recently I have not been allowed to hold the horse to be shot, apparently H&S doesn't allow it. On every occasion, the horse has gone with its head in a bucket of feed and known nothing at all of what was going to happen. Death has been instantaneous.
 
Big hugs to you. I think you are very brave, it's never pleasant and it certainly never gets easier. I too would prefer them PTS with a gun. I won't scare you with the details of my experience with the injection when you are already going through alot anyway.

The noise is loud and it does ring around your ears for a while but I take peace in the fact the horse never knows anything about it. I am a shooting hobbyist and husband and I worked out that the bullet leaves the gun at around 800+mph. The horse is gone before the sound even reaches our ears.

I echo everyone else regarding the loading. I have only watched it once when it was a friends horse and so I had no emotional attachment to him and it's actually the worse part about it. I am afraid with an animal as big as a horse there isn't a huge amount of dignity in how they get up the ramp into the truck.

My knackerman is the kindest and most compassionate man I have ever had the pleasure of dealing with. He really is wonderful and genuinely cares about his job. Everything is done quietly, efficiently and with the least amount of stress to man and beast possible.

Massive hugs to you. I am afraid all of us if we haven't been there before we will be in the future.
 
Good grief, it's bad enough without you having to go through that. The horse will know nothing about it, and if you are going to be upset that will only upset the horse too. All the vets and knackermen I know prefer emotionally attached owners not to be present.
 
So sorry to hear you have to consider this final decision - its never easy.
The first horse I had PTS was shot, with a humane killer - a threw the rope at the YM and ran - i could not stay with her. Since then I've had all mine PTS with injection, I've stayed with them to the end, its generally gentle and serene, I do know that some people have had the horse react violently but fortunately that never happened to me.
 
Sorry you're going through this OP, I've been through it twice this summer and it's awful. Both of mine went by injection, they went peacefully/quietly and I stayed until they were 'gone' but not for the uplift. For Smartie, because he was bigger, the vet took the rope after the injection went in and 'guided' him down, for Jazz who was only 14.2hh, I held the rope right the way through. I did cry all the way through for both, but personally I couldn't leave them even if my crying was a bit unusual for them, it certainly didn't upset them, they only cared about the pockets of sweets and apples I had. For me personally I couldn't have a horse shot, I want to be able to see their faces for a final goodbye.

Whatever you choose to do, do what's right for you and your horse, if you stay, grand, if you have to leave fine, it's a massively personal thing.
 
Do what feels right on the day. Have a second person you and your horse both trust there, so if you can't face it you can hand them over. My first, I had to get YO to hold her and I turned away. The second, I had to be with her as it was an emergency and there was no-one else to help. It was actually ok, although it saddens me to think back sometimes that after 28 years together my final memory was of her keeling over. The last time, OH took her at the last minute and I went and cried into my youngster's mane. I could be there again, I have just chosen not to, having done both. I have always been close enough to know they knew nothing of it though. It's a rubbish thing to have to deal with but you will know at the time what's right for you both.
 
I have come in to this without reading others, my thinking is that unless you are happy to be there, the best thing is to arrange for it to be done when you are not there.
I asked for a clean wagon and clean clothes for the man. They will accommodate you if you are happy to pay any small extra charge involved.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top