Pushing yourself to improve vs. rushing things

Jingleballs

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How do you tell the difference?

I am notorious for wussing out of certain things when it comes to riding – mainly jumping, galloping etc but usually I can be coerced into doing it by friends/RI.

I have been very slowly building up my jumping with C – I kept telling myself that I wasn’t good enough at jumping and he wasn’t balanced/steady enough yet so I set myself the aim of jumping one clear round (of reasonable sized jumps) by the end of the year.

Last weekend, about a week after setting that target we achieved it at a local show – we only did the clear round as it was Casper’s first time going round a course but he was excellent. As usual I’d originally planned on only jumping 2 or 3 of the jumps (the crosses) as some of the straights just looked too big and one of them was a spread (neither or us have jumped a spread before). My friend told me to “just get on with it and jump them all” and we did, and I was so proud!

I hate the fact that it takes a push from someone else to make me do these things especially when I end up really enjoying myself and I also worry that people will overestimate what I’m capable of and push me a little to far!! It also worries me that people only ever tell you that you can do it and will never say you're not ready for something yet!

So how do you find that fine line between pushing yourself to ensure you reach your potential and pushing yourself too far and putting you and your horse at risk!!
 
If you aren't that confident of knowing your ability then I you need to chat with a honest friend who will let you know of what they believe you & your horse are capable of. At local shows you hear so many riders saying "I'm doing the 2'03" but I'm not going to do the 2'06" class"??? Why??? A horse doesn't carry a tape measure & the difference is 3", not even the thickness of the pole. If you measure from the ground to your horse's belly that is the height he can step over without the need to jump.

Height is in the head of the rider, not in the horse's. Get a nice forward canter & go & enjoy yourself....... if you want everything to be perfect before you do you'll be old & grey by then.............. get out & enjoy, you know you want to
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A true friend or a good riding instructor will push you if they believe you need that little extra nudge in the right direction, but at the same time they should know not ot over face you or put you in any danger.

Sometimes it is frustrating for this 'friend or instructor' to get a person to do something and to make them realise that they can actually do it and its just the other persons confidence that is holding them back, trick is to build there confidence slowly and not bully them into it or make them feel a failier or a wimp just because they wont try a bit harder or have more faith in themselves (or their horse) and unleash that hidden talent.

I persuaded my friend to do a HT and she really tried and put her nerves to one side for the day, it was big thing for her and she did really well and enjoyed it so much, I got pleasure out of seeing that she can do it and she was so glad that I made her do it (I didn't make her) her words not mine you get my dift.

Don't ever feel you have something to prove, or feel like you have to fit in with the crowd, do what's best for you and your horse, if you want to take it steady and build your confidence up slowly and your enjoying it....then where's the problem?....whets there to worry about?

If you do feel that you really want to get further a quicker pace, then take the bull by the horns and be positive about the it rather than thinking its a chore...which will cause you to worry and basically think too deeply about it.

Set yourself small achievable goals, get a really nice instructor who understands you, let them jump aboard your horse and prove that your horse can do it, so you've no hang ups in that area, and work together with friends that will back you up no matter what and pick you up when your feeling down...or scrape you when you take a tumble, dust you down and say its ok, put a smile on your face and say lets try again next time.
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A proper friend will never push you beyond what your l;ikley to achieve at that time especially if they know both you and your horse
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I think we all need a little bit of a pick me up from our friends now and again to get ourselves out there.

You yourself will know what your likely able to acheive as well and no-one can really push you to do something that you dont want to do
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Nikki xxxx
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