Returning to Riding - Stressfull! (LONG POST)!!

Dunlin

Dunlin

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Hello H&H lovelies! :)

I've been a "lurker" here for quite a few years! I enjoy following the 3 day event threads like Badminton & Burghley but having not ridden since 1999 I just stayed in the background ;)

However... I miss horses and ponies SO MUCH!

At the tender age of 30 *blushes* I have decided that I can afford to enjoy a spot of riding once again.

I thought this would be easy... surely stables want my money and for the price that my local ones are charging for lessons then surely they would actually LISTEN to me?

No :(

Firstly, what I have mentioned to the 2 stables I have been to is the following:

I rode as a small child all the way up until I went to University. I was a member of the Pony Club, the local hunt, went on horse riding holidays and competed in all disciplines... WAS being the operative word. I have done all that, I loved every moment of it but I have no intention of going back to anything like that. I just want to ride once a fortnight and enjoy being on a horse again. It is purely for enjoyment in a non-competative environment.

To add to the strongly enforced point above, I suffer quite badly from M.E (chronic fatigue syndrome) which started some 3 years ago. I get fatigued VERY quickly and I cannot do anything too strenuous or I will be bed-bound and in agony for months.

Fast forward to the first stables I went to (I live in Milton Keynes but I won't name names, if you want to know you can PM me).

All the above was explained over the phone and I was re-assured that it was no problem and I would have a great time. I booked a 30 minute private lesson to see how rusty I was.

I was given my horse, kitted up, mounted and went to the outdoor school. I was sharing the arena with 8 children who were galloping and jumping around like idiots as they were on a "own your own horse" day. The horse I was on got incredibly twitchy to the point I was actually scared she was going to bolt to join in the "fun". I was a bag of nerves and voiced my concerns to the instructor who told me to stop worrying.

The lesson was a complete mess, I was constantly trying to avoid these nutters racing around the school, the horse I was on was a mental nutcase that kept throwing in mini-rears, big bucks and bolts with her head between her knees (she really wanted me OFF) and my instructor had now deserted me and was helping to teach someone elses horse to canter on the correct leg :confused:

I carried on around the school avoiding the carnage and pointing the mare towards the fence to stop her going off on one (she was excellent at leg yielding!) when all of a sudden the instructor stopped me and told me I had to hurry up, get off the horse and go to the office.

I did so and the mare I was on was hurridly taken away.

Be prepared for a shock guys and girls...

Back in the office the instructor came in. I had been riding a livery horse that had been off with an injured hock for 6 weeks. Adding to that, the mare was only 5 years old, an ex racehorse and had only had a few weeks of riding school training before getting the hock injury. I was shocked and I got no apology, the instructor just laughed and said I did well not to come off!

That riding school put me on someone elses horse, an ex racehorse that was not schooled, one that was incredibly fresh due to not being ridden for 6 weeks... I was lucky that the mare did not break down or I was not seriously hurt.

I still had to pay my £45 and I left really unhappy.

Riding school number 2.... gonna shorten this as the post is really long already!

Explained all the usual and made sure it was mentally logged with my instructor.

I spent 45 minutes being yelled at because I could not get the horse to halt square. Of that 45 minutes I spent 2 minutes trotting, no canter, nothing else, just constantly walking round the school trying to make a fidgety horse stand square. I was told she would not let me canter until at least 6 weeks so she could see what my riding was like as anyone could just walk in and claim they know how to ride :confused:

Why is it so damn difficult to a) find a decent riding school and b) an instructor that appreciates you just want to have a play on a horse every fortnight and that I can actually ride and do not need to pay over £200 in lessons just to have a wee canter!!!

Anyone from Milton Keynes or that area can recommend me somewhere to ride... pleaaaaaaase.

I believe it is customary to offer treats for people that have read all of this.

Tonight I can provide Hot Chocolate with Marshmallows and some golden crunch oat biscuits :D

P.S, my name is Helen and Dunlin was my first horse (in the avatar) :)
 
£45 for a 30 minute private lesson that wasn't private due to the crazy kids! I'm very shocked. I wouldn't have thought they'd take those risks nowadays.

As for the other one, it sounds quite germanic in the way of teaching. They'd probably teach you well, but it would be no fun.

I came back to riding after a ten year break, and had lessons for a few months before buying my own, and had lovely experiences at my local equestrian centre. I had a few privates before joining their working pupil lessons. They did once put me on a horse with problems that had been created by its owner the night before (she had galloped it round the indoor school and it had fallen over and scared itself, and had refused to canter with her afterwards) without telling me, as they knew my riding level by then, and they knew there would be no problems. There weren't. If anything they were over cautious with clients rather than lax.

I'd be inclined to write to the first school, explaining what a negative experience you had, that destroyed your confidence, and how you felt the lesson was dangerous and unprofessional. They really ought to reply and apologise.

Hope you find somewhere.
 
Ouch ouch ouch: such poor treatment and such big money. Rubbish! A private 30min lesson in a stupidly busy school is unforgiveable. I get nervous as a spectator when a lesson contains more than people!

I was reading an article today on how there are fewer and fewer 'hobby' riders (taking lessons once or twice a week/month) due to the recession, so you'd think places would be glad of the business?! Still, it's a service industry like any other: if I'm not treated right then me and my money go elsewhere. It's a shame you've had to go through that twice.

I had the same thing 6 months ago - missing horse riding like crazy, forced to stop only because of Uni and unsupportive non-horsey, so I finally got back into it in June last year. I've hit the jackpot first time though in terms of yard and instructor. Fingers crossed it's 3rd time lucky for you: I'm sure I'm not the only one who'll look forward to hearing how you get on in settling back into riding 80)
 
Oh dear, make sure the next instructor you see is BHS qualified. A private lesson should be just that - private! Also, yelling at someone does not make them learn and defeats the objective of making the rider want to engage in what should be a pleasure hobby.

I don't think you'll have much luck as a sharer given your illness, as owners need reliability in a sharer - given your health needs, you really need to look after yourself first and make yourself the highest priority. A horse owner usually wants the sharer to make their horse the highest priority - I know I do.

Good luck and keep trying, you'll find the right instructor soon:)
 
Hi there,
I run a riding school, but unfortunately can't help you with advice for a centre near Milton Keynes. However, I was horrified at your experiences at two centres and wonder how riding centres expect to stay open if they treat paying clients like this. I think its a real shame, as a good riding school is definitely the best option for you to return to riding, and a good riding school should be happy to accommodate all types of riders and ambition. At our centre, we're happy to provide lessons for both hobby riders, who want to simply enjoy time on a horse and be given constructive feedback, as well as more ambitious competition riders.
If the first centre you describe is BHS approved, then I hope you have the time to write a letter to the BHS detailing your experiences as not only are they unsafe (with an unassessed rider being expected to ride amongst numerous others), but they appear to display poor horse welfare in their horse selection, and are quite frankly far too expensive at £45 for a private lesson in a busy environment with an apparently poor level instructor.
The second centre sounds fairly disappointing, and completely non-constructive. There is no need, whatever anyone says, to keep a competent rider in walk for the majority of their lesson unless there is a specific walk problem they wish to work on.
I hope someone from the area can recommend somewhere for you - if you find a good centre, you will love it and it will allow you to ride again regularly in a really fun environment.
 
I would say go to the next riding school in person and talk to them first, watch some lessons, and only book one if you are comfortable with them. I had a 15-year break and returned to riding last year (and riding for the first time over here) and I did what I am advising you to do to make sure I got it right and I'm pleased to say I did. I have an instructor who dealt with the rusty me for the first couple of lessons and has adapted to the more experienced me that surfaced after I got the cobwebs shaken out - and all without shouting at me once :). By going in person I could also check out the standard of care of the horses and get the lay of the land to make sure I knew what was expected of me. Definitely worth the time investment.
 
My advice would be to say you rode as a child, but haven't ridden in X years. Don't go into specifics.

Some yards decide to try you out to see if you're telling the truth about your abilities and will put you on a horse that will test you to your limits... and it looks like that's what's happened with you.
 
Returning to riding can be hard work; if your looking for fun, why not try hacking rather than lessons - enjoy being on a horse away from a 'school' envoirment.

A quick mooch on google and i found this:

http://www.bryerley-springs-farm.co.uk/page/prices

I've never been but could be worth a shot?

Or, does anyone on here have a horse/pony they need exercising in your area?
 
sounds like you have had a very rough time so far with instructors/schools. hopefully someone on here can point you in the right direction for a decent one!

my step daughter used to ride my horse all the time, she would take him out on her own or with a friend regularly, she could handle him when trotting and cantering. BUT she never listened to me with my 'orders' so i booked her in for lessons in a local riding school, after 9 lessons they still kept her in walk and she was actually getting worse so i told them what they could do with their lessons (i had an arguement with her instructor over another matter a couple of weeks before) and booked her in to another riding school.
the first lesson was basic walk and trot, the second week she was going over trotting poles, the third week she was jumping 1'6, they taught her to ride properly and she improved.
keep looking around for a school and check their credentials and even go and watch a couple of lessons that you would most likely be in.

good luck
 
I would enquire with the school about a lesson and then watch someone else's. I rode at a riding school for about 6 years and each intructor had a different approach. We had those that yelled, those that left you feeling ripped off and those that gave you the confidence to do something you thought you couldn't do. Have you tried getting recommendations from your local tack shops?

You will find one that suits you I'm sure :)
 
I would write to the first school complaining and ask for a refund, it can do no harm trying. I wouldn't have parted with the money in the first place, but I'm sure you were too shell hocked to deal with that at the time.
I can't help with recommending a school, but next time maybe ask if you can go and watch a lesson with the instructor you would be having before you go ahead?
I'm pondering the comment somewhere above about next time making sure the instructor is BHS qualified. In my experience that is no guarantee of getting a good lesson, but seeing the instructor in action in advance is useful.
 
Thank you so much for all your replies!

As someone mentioned I wouldn't share a horse or offer my services to exercise one as my illness is unpredictable and I am definately not reliable. I also do not feel confident to state that my level of riding is suitable to care for someone elses horse as only an instructor can answer that question for me.

Secondly, again with regards to my illness, I don't really want to go out hacking (yet) as I have no idea if I am physically up to that yet, riding around a school is much better as I can stop at any time if I get too tired.

The link that someone provided me for a riding school called Bryerly Springs... I appreciate you taking the time to search for me but unfortunately that is the first school I went to. However they seem to have changed names since I went (July 2010) as it used to be called Jolly Jockeys.

I do appreciate that sometimes a bad experience is unfortunate and a one off but I really do not fancy going back there again as there were several points that were unprofessional, dangerous and the price was horrendous. I was told that "private" just meant I had an instructor to myself, not the whole arena... things have obviously changed since I last rode!

However, things look on the up! I have found 1 other riding school just outside of Milton Keynes. I gave them a call this morning and spoke to a very nice lady who was the owner and head instructor plus BHS qualified. I have taken the advice from a couple of members replies and I am going to visit Wednesday afternoon to watch a private lesson as they have a lady who used to ride but has returned after 5 years and just wants to have some fun with horses. The "aim" is that if I like the place and want to book a lesson, to keep the cost down the other lady would be happy to share a semi-private lesson with me which is £26 for 30 minutes and we get the entire arena to ourself (much better!) :D

I also took someone's advice as to not go into specifics about my riding history, I think perhaps you are correct and maybe I was coming across as a know-it-all and "I used to be amazing" type of thing (which was not what I ever intended lol), so I just said I used to ride but haven't for the last 10 years ;)

Really looking forward to this one as it all sounds so promising and perfect, I'm sure it will be as well because perhaps tradition is telling me 3rd time lucky :D

Thank you again for all your excellent replies, it is very much appreciated! :)
 
WHen I returned to riding after finishing Uni I found an abundance of dreadful riding schools. I tried a couple and found the instruction to be shocking. Several I rang up were incredibly rude. I began googling them and the names of their instructors and found one whose name was mentioned on several horsey websites, BHS registered, the instructor was a local BHS representative, they held TREC comps, they were involved in the local Hunt. So I plumped for them and it was the correct choice as I was taught well.
Unfortunately for me this did not quell my horse addiction, it made it far worse and now I own my own!

So maybe google a few and see which are the most 'horsey'?
 
Just wanted to wish you luck- I'm in exactly the same position as you. I'm not used to a 'riding school' atmosphere either- so I'm keeping my eyes open for a share.
 
I know just what you mean, I have recently returned to riding after a long break and I have found riding schools rude, unhelpful and lessons being given by the yard girls. I think the worst one was, after getting on the horse a lead rope was attached (I'm 27) and I was walked round the school for the duration of the lesson :mad::mad::mad: safe to say I didn't go back.

Keep looking and I hope you find somewhere soon :)
 
After 6/7 years I decided to try and get back into riding in the nottighamshire area - trying to find a decent riding school was a nightmare. I was lucky enough to be introduced to someone who is now a good friend and owned a stables so she helped me and I could ride her horses.

The reply from most riding schools was we have nothing suitable or could only fit you in at stupid times. I did go to one and after saying I hadnt jumped for 7 years properly wanted a jumping lesson - they put me on Grade A jumping pony worth £25k who proceeded to bomb round the school. If I hadnt have clicked with the horse and managed to calm it down it could have been potentially dangerous.

So have given up and borrow beg and steal when I can off friends.
 
Glad you have hopefully found somewhere suitable :)

But have to say I am shocked at the first riding school:eek: from what I gather they put you on a horse who hasn't been ridden for 6 weeks due to injury, I assume wasn't supposed to be being ridden due to injury and I'm also guessing livery(owner) hadn't given consent for her horse to be used :eek::mad::mad: Can't believe that, what the hell were they thinking :confused: glad neither you or horse were physically hurt. I would be fuming perhaps mad enough to inform owner of horse, they shouldn't be doing that without her knowledge/permission :mad: What a recipe for disaster :(
 
I am so sorry you had such rotten experiences - as a 'returner' myself, I know it is the security of a good instructor and the restoration of your confidence that is the most important.

I think we must be lucky round here (too far away for you, I'm afraid) - when I was looking for somewhere I took the advice of the lady in the local tack shop and found the school/yard where I now keep Hugo. She is so good! She seems really to understand what her clients want (she also has some WONDERFUL horses to suit everyone) and will take her lead from what you say. She charges £16 for a TOTALLY private half hour!! (Less if you are an owner)! Bargain!

There is another school that I went to for 'refresher' lesson (before I found my current one) and had a really bad experience (I think the instructor was a 'trainee') - horse wouldn't move and I couldn't make it! It really knocked my confidence. I booked another lesson before I left but subsequently phoned to cancel. Within minutes the owner called me back to ask why and I was totally honest with her. She offered me a free half hour with another instructor. I went back, and was so happy that I did! The new instructor was excellent - I think she is the one who really 'taught' me to ride. I stopped going there as they didn't have a suitable horse for me when I was (very) big! They charged £26 for a private half hour.

I also went to the famous Oldencraig for a lesson on a schoolmaster! All I can say is that horse was worth every penny of the £100,000 he cost! Stunning! It is a different sort of riding though, for me - a happy hacker! I will do that again one day - made me feel like I could really 'ride'!! ;). I think that was £46 for the half hour.

I think you were robbed - you must complain!
 
Thanks again for more great replies!

I have just found the PM button so have informed y'all of the schools I went to, VERY amusing how everyone got them correct! :rolleyes:

I was recommended the first school by a tack shop owner as I needed to get some jods and boots (not sure when I grew out of being a size 8) :p The second school I went to because my nextdoor neighbours daughter was doing her work experience there.

Back onto the first school, giving me the injured horse that wasn't a riding school one.

I did hang around for about an hour afterwards as yes I was fully prepared to inform the owner, if it was me I would be furious, that poor horse could have been seriously hurt being ridden. Not sure what was wrong with her, just got told she had injured her hock and had been off for 6 weeks.

I stayed around the horses stable waiting for the owner to arrive. Heard plenty of chatter from kids, mums and stable girls. On that day there was an "own your own horse" day, it seems that someone who was on that day was sent out to the paddocks to collect riding school horses and they came back with the wrong one for me. I can't blame the person, being told "16hh bay mare" is very vague!

What bothered me the most is the obvious lack of attention my instructor (yard owner) gave me and it was only near the end of the lesson that she suddenly realised I was not riding a school horse. I know some can look very similar but surely when the mare was playing up and did not know how to transition to canter easily... well, you would think the Y/O would have noticed!

After an hour or so there was no sign of the owner so I went home. Despite this lesson being 6 months ago I have today sent the yard an email expressing my opinion and disastisfaction and hoping that they learn something from this as they have technically lost £45 a fortnight, which is an amount not to be sniffed at!

Interesting as it seems... on this yards website, you click on "riding school prices" and it says the page is under construction, even though this website has been live for years and updated regularly. I wonder if it was a case of "they saw me coming" with regards to the price.

Another point on both schools. Not sure if there are any rules in place for this, but I had no hat because I could hire one for £2 from both yards. At both yards they had VERY old fixed peak velvet hats and skulls in only bigger sizes. Not a PAS-015 or BSEN1384 in sight. The second school had a tack shop so I bought my own one.

Anyway, looking forward to Wednesday, have high hopes for this next school :D
 
Where do you go Mrs Hutt? I have a friend who is going through similar to Dunlin and could really do with finding a friendly place to ride.
 
If I had paid for a private lesson then id expect the school to be empty. You didnt pay to share the space! You paid to have every second focused on you! I wouldnt have paid for that lesson! Id have told them where to go.
 
Hello! i'm new to this forum as well, having had my first lesson in... ooh about 12 years yesterday. I was really lucky and seem to have found a great yard. Teacher was fairly stern, but very helpful, and the horse seemed fine. I had really hoped however that it would all come flooding back, and I really can't say it did. I can hardly walk today after half an hour's private lesson (£24), but have booked in for next weekend, so here's to hoping it will start to come back. I think I may need to start taking some regular exercise too!
 
Hi Mrsm, congrats on your first lesson the other day!

Don't worry I thought I had done some serious damage the day (and rest of the week) after my first lesson back, by 'eck did it hurt!

I paid the "new" riding school a visit Wednesday. Unfortunately not onto a winner. There are only 2 horses suitabloe for me to ride, 1 of them was being used by the lady I watched the lesson and he was a very tired old Cob. Took a lunge whip to make him trot and he only cantered with his front legs for about 3 seconds. The other horse was a rather psychotic chesnut mare that was eating her stable door and tried to take most of my arm off when offered a polo.

I would feel really sad making that old Cob do a lesson and although a horses demeanour can be very different from stable to school I wouldn't feel happy going near the Chesnut mare.

That's all the riding schools in Milton Keynes done with now.

Might go back to the second one, give them another go, the horses were lovely, tidy yard, nice tack, maybe I just got unlucky with the instructor so will try for a different one next time.

Just want to say a big thank you to everyone that has helped me and given me sound advice on this thread and for all the PM's of support, advice and places to go as well.

You're a lovely bunch :D
 
Nothing useful to add about riding schools (I'm in America) but I'd tell you to stick with it. After fifteen years away from the saddle, I returned to riding eighteen months ago. I was lucky enough to take several lessons with a marvellous dressage trainer while on holiday, but the first riding school I tried after that was terrible. Fast forward a few months and I found a great place. After being assessed on a ploddy horse, I rode a retired TB eventer for the next year, riding him in my first show in fifteen years, and now that he's retired, I've partnered with another TB who is so reliable and lovely, but forward-going and with enough quirks to keep me on my toes.

I hope you find the perfect situation for your return to riding :) I honestly don't know why I ever gave up.
 
Ah, Dunlin, your situation is very like mine!

I rode till university, had an eleven year break and started having the occasional lesson again a couple of years ago. In German. Because I moved here. My German is not great :o Also? The club I went to was a culture shock after a childhood of English riding schools. It was all a bit of a saga which I can't type up here, but after several scary incidents and losing my nerve all over again, I skedaddled. I still had to pay out several hundred euros though, as here you join a club for a year at a time, and although I'd joined in February, I didn't realise that the new "riding club year" starts in September and... yeah, I won't go on.

Now I've ridden three times at a very friendly yard 45 minutes' train-ride away where the horses live out (shock!), aren't strapped down in "triangle reins" ( :eek: ) and there are no lessons, just glorious hacking. It was recommended to me by my doctor (ace woman with her own Icelandic horse) and another friend.

I've temporarily given up on having lessons. I'll wait until I have a solid recommendation of a place with happy horses and good instruction that's more, er, classical than stereotypically Teutonic*. I did have a great lesson when I was at home visiting my parents in Norfolk, at a BHS-approved small yard that's been in business for forty years and had connections to my old riding school (now closed).

If you only want to ride occasionally, I'd recommend looking further afield for good places. Failing that, are there any freelance instructors with their own horses out there?


* I met someone who used to do dressage at junior international level and he was shocked by my tales of this place...
 
Gutentag Susanna!

I hail from Landstuhl in Germany. Lived there for 3 years, went back for 6 months every year till I was 14 as my godparents are out there. Have not been there for a few years though but desperate to go back!

Funnily enough I did go to a riding school out there, it was in Dahn. Amazing place and beautiful land. No questions asked, was put on a horse and straight out of the yard and onto a lovely 2 hour hack! Ahhh memories! :)

I'll give the second school another go and if there is no improvement on what happened last time then I have a great recommendation of one a bit further afield. On the bright side I have found out that one of my friends in MK fancies going horse riding too. She used to ride but only hacking in walk so we are a little bit apart on experience but we have decided that we can go together and have our lessons one after the other. Super Duper that sorts out my lack of transport issues! :D

Hopefully will book a lesson in February, get all of January's bills out of the way, get yet another pair of Jods (WHY has my dog chewed them to bits?!!!) and will hopefully pop a report on here of a great stables! ;)
 
Gutentag!

Yes, on the whole I find German riding places less "health and safety" than the UK, and now that I'm finding my feet I'm finding places which are a better fit for me. One of the problems is being in a city, but Brandenburg is stuffed to the gills with horsey establishments of all varieties :)

Great idea to have a friend to take you. I keep trying that here, but it's hard to shoe horn people out of city stuff sometimes. Good luck with trying the second place again :D
 
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