Rider and Yard Anxiety

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Lotsoflemons

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Hi I need some help and tips, I'm a very anxious person and I have recently moved yards from a quiet farm to a livery yard about a month ago and my pony is very settled but I'm just dreading going to the yard at the minitue! Everyone is lovely but my anxiety of Feeling overwhelmed that people will judge me riding or That there's loads of people there who constantly want to chat and go for Weekly Hacks and ask me.. It's all alot! And recently more and more liveries are coming and its just overwhelming me! I haven't been able to ride much because as soon as I Hack out I panick about getting lost or what might happen with cars etc it's a very busy and New area to me! And alot going on, At my old yard it was dead country lanes and we were there for nearly 4 years so I was very settled! And I rode often It was just so far away from home, I really want to get over my anxiety so I can enjoy my pony again and have fun going out!
Any tips?
 
That's really tough. It sounds like you have found yourself a great yard with nice people, they want to chat and ride and that's lovely, so hold onto that thought. I do understand though that anxiety doesnt really work like that and It does sound just a little bit much. Whats the yard owner like? Could you maybe have a quiet chat with her, tell her how you feel? Maybe she could buddy you up with another quiet livery and just help you get your feet under the table a little. She could also maybe advise quieter times of the day to visit, if that's feasible with other commitments?
Why don't you just go for a nice chilled walk round a little hacking route, just on foot, familiarise yourself with where you go and whats around the next corner then you will feel better about going on your pony.
You could also maybe make an appointment with your GP and see if there is any help out there for Anxiety, I'm sure there is.
Good luck!
 
Firstly, you are very lucky in the fact that people are being so friendly and asking you to ride etc. why dont you say to one person that has asked you, go for a ride with one other horse to begin with and build from there.

Believe me, not all yards are friendly like that.
There is always someone somewhere that either the wind is in their face constantly 🤣 or critical and judgy but dont think about that at all. Their input is not required.
Concentrate on you and your horse. As long as you are both happy 😊
 
poiuytrewq said:
That's really tough. It sounds like you have found yourself a great yard with nice people, they want to chat and ride and that's lovely, so hold onto that thought. I do understand though that anxiety doesnt really work like that and It does sound just a little bit much. Whats the yard owner like? Could you maybe have a quiet chat with her, tell her how you feel? Maybe she could buddy you up with another quiet livery and just help you get your feet under the table a little. She could also maybe advise quieter times of the day to visit, if that's feasible with other commitments?
Why don't you just go for a nice chilled walk round a little hacking route, just on foot, familiarise yourself with where you go and whats around the next corner then you will feel better about going on your pony.
You could also maybe make an appointment with your GP and see if there is any help out there for Anxiety, I'm sure there is.
Good luck!
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Thank you! The Yard owner is lovely too but as its a working livery farm and she lives next door to the stables it gets very busy! I have a girl my age in my stable block so I'm hoping I will settle in more and can go out with her soon!
 
My advice would be to begin meditating. I use an app called “insight timer” which has hundreds of free sessions. It’s truly worked miracles for me and I would also be a very anxious person. Body scans are my particular favourite. Another thing I would do constantly when I need to is have an internal dialogue. For example “this is anxiety. I know it is. I can still breathe, I can relax my shoulders, I can still walk to the door, I’m walking to the door, I’ve walked through the door, I’m walking to my saddle, I’ve got my saddle” etc. it really helps to break the “omg I’m anxious why am I anxious, I can’t do this” dialogue.
 
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