Riding again after a confidence bashing!

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LittleBurd83

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I am going to bite the bullet and get on my horse after my pregnancy and many months of my horse being a complete pain to handle on the ground (we are still currently dealing with this). I am scared stiff but I think I'll feel a lot better if I just do it.

So who else here faced their fears of riding again after losing their confidence? How did it go for you?
 
Can't say I've experienced exactly what you're going through, but how about A. Getting someone experienced up first, or B. Lunging beforehand?
 
Yes I will have the YO helping me. We are going to lunge him first, then I will just be walking around the school, don't fancy tearing off through the fields straight away lol!
 
I was rather cautious about riding again after having little B. I found it helpful just to have a few rides on something I knew was sane and sensible. Just helped to remind the body what it was supposed to do rather than jumping in at the deep end :)
 
I had a crisis of confidence after my loan horse threw me for a 3rd time, breaking my leg! We didn't know it was broken for a couple of months. I started by riding my friend's 'safe as houses' lovely horse* (who I had really learnt on and knew so well), just in a weekly lesson. We built it up until I felt ok to get my super boy - but it took some months of taking it really steady, with LOTS of support from instructor and everyone at the yard.

It was about 5 months before I dare take him out (with my lovely *friend) but we have taken baby steps all the time and I am getting more and more confident all the time (even been doing a bit of jumping recently :eek::eek:).

Can you have a few lessons with an instructor you trust? My advice would be to take it really slowly and set yourself little tiny goals each time you ride. You feel so proud of yourself when you achieve them (yippee, I cantered in the school on my own etc etc) :D:D
 
I thought I was wary about getting back on my boy after having my little girl & so I just sucked it up, got on & went for a ride. It was all in my head, once I was back on board I felt totally at ease.
I do firmly believe it conquering your fears though & doing things you want to do regardless of if you're scared or not!
 
Hi getting on again after haveing kids is a real dilema as you now have a little person who needs you so if your horse is in any way difficult be very careful, also you have not said what caused the confidence bashing ? if you know your horse well and its just a confidence thing i would say just go for it and it will all come back :D but if you are in anyway worried that your horse may be a bit of a tit :) get an experienced rider to get on first as sometimes just watching someone else ride your horse is all you need .
 
I think that this depends; if the horse has been behaving particularly badly on the ground, it won't be just a matter of getting back in the saddle of the same horse you rode before becoming a mom (and by the way, CONGRATULATIONS!).

not only are you out of shape, dulled muscle memory and such, you also are now a mom, which means you have more than your own life to consider. YOu need to be there and able to raise your new child, for YEARS to come. you cannot indulge in the same risks you might have before.

Would you like to explain some of the bad behavior you are experiencing?

and, I second some who recmmended using steady Eddie first.
 
He's been a trouble to lead in from the field since I became pregnant (we currently have a behaviourist working out a training plan for him) he learnt that striking out at me and rearing/pulling backwards meant I would let go and he could run back to his field mates, so I know, my fault, but had to keep myself as safe as possible.

I've been getting him ridden 3x a week by the YO and he's been a star to ride (he always has been). She has problems leading him also, when he's in a normal head collar. A dually head collar he respects more so she uses this. (I've tried it too but I think I need more practice with it).

This is what has made me feel scared and that "new mum" feeling you get to keep yourself safe has really kicked in! But I really want to keep my hobby that, pre-pregnancy, I loved so much.

It would be far easier at the moment to just give up and sell him but I know I wouldn't get another horse and feel I would regret it.

I think I've just hit a wall as its been so long and ongoing. once I'm over it, I'll be fine, it just feels like a massive hurdle right now :(
 
That, and all kinds of hormones coursing through the body, and sleep depriviation, no doubt. I can imagine you are under a load of stress right now. my sons are grown now, but I remember how hard it was right after they were born.

I would want time spent with horses to be rejuvenating, at least mentally, if I could not ride. I would want to be able to go get my horse, groom and love on her so that I went back home refreshed and sane again.

If this horse is actally striking out at you, then to me, THAT is the primary issue , not whether or not you should throw a leg over her, once she has been drug out of the field.
I think you need someone to help you deal with this problem, becuase once you feel confident on the ground with your mare, riding her will be a piece of cake.

Is there a trainer around there who can work with you on learning how to insist on and instill the very best ground manners?
 
Thanks Zeehorse. (He's a TB gelding) we have a behaviourist currently writing up a training plan and I have spent time "enriching" his environment to help him feel safe and less anxious as she feels this may be a contributing factor being that he is an ex-racer.

I'm just itching to ride again so much, I haven't ridden since December and since he's so well behaved when ridden, I figured that this may give me more confidence to tackle our ground issues. I know this is a little back to front....
 
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