*ring ring ring ring* hello?.... do you whip it? do you whip it lots?!!!!!!

[Chloe_GHE]

can you guess who my mother got a call from today?...

Yes it was the 'Whip It Pervert Man' !!!!!

I know some of you in CR have also been on the receiving end of his affections so I thought I would share his latest antics, as he's got quite a good story going now! (he even said he had got his number from our local tack shop, and named them! not a hard thing to do as they are linked from my mum's site)

The phone rang and mum answered, and the man on the other end 'Paul Heart' inquired about livery for his wife's horse, she had a bad back so would need it ridden during the week, where they were atm the fields were too muddy and he also needed 24/7 turnout etc etc all sounded pretty convincing....

He then asked what my mum's views were on using a whip on a horse....(sound familiar yet?...) she said well if necessary she would use one, and he carried on saying stuff like what if it was really bad? how hard would you whip it?... etc etc

my lovely mother is so sweet and innocent she assumed he was concerned about the safety and treatment of his horse!!!!! so she said well I wouldn't actually be riding it myself the girl who does the yard work would be I can give you her number if you like?...OH YES PLEASE!

So he then phoned the girl who does all the livery work (I say girl, she is mid 30's and cottoned on to what he was up to pretty quick!) she answered and he started the same line of questions, and then the 'whip talk' began, he started asking her how big her whip was, where she kept it etc etc, and the breathing got heavier!!!!! She swiftly ended the call!

Now he said he would call my mum back the same day to confirm if he needed the livery, and he called back!

He asked how my mum's ride had gone, and she said the horse had been perfect, what perfect?... he said, YES said my mum PERFECT, NOT A FOOT WRONG! he said not any bad behaviour?.... and she said again quite emphatically NO HE WAS PERFECT and he hung up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA

I know this isn't really a laughing issue, but he 1471-ed his number so we have nothing to tell the police (or do we, because I put tracking on my mum's business website so I do actually have a list of IP addresses, which will be sent to the police if needed mwhahahhahahha)

This guy must make a habit of this because he called me once (when I had my mob number on my blog) and a few other peeps on here I remember mentioning getting one of his calls....

So heads up peeps, if the convo starts to go down the whipping route you know what to do!

 

[now_loves_mares]

Oh dear - sorry Chloe but is it wrong that I laughed. A lot.

Weirdo.....

 

[Chloe_GHE]

Oh dear - sorry Chloe but is it wrong that I laughed. A lot.

Weirdo.....

No I had the same reaction when my mum was recounting it, I couldn't stop giggling that she just fwded on the livery girl's number thinking he was genuine! hahahahha

 

[kirstyhen]

Haha!!

I had some Petrie Boots advertised a while ago (they were so tight I passed out in my assignment room at Uni and had three lecturers pulling them off me )
My Mum got a phonecall from a bloke who seemed more concerned about speaking to the owner than the boots, than he did about the state of the boots. He kept asking when I'd be there and saying I must be tall because of the boot measurements. He rang back a few times, until my Mum got annoyed and told him he was welcome to come round when I was home from Uni, but that my 6ft4 rugby boyfriend would probably be about too

And a Riding School local to us had someone ringing up asking if they would allow them to clean riding boots. They would pay £500 to do so, but they must have been worn and ridden in.... If they'd caught me the night before hunting and promised to do a good job, I'd be tempted

 

[Chloe_GHE]

so it's not limited to whips, people have a thing for dirty boots too?... blurgh....

I can see a niche market here....

 

[kirstyhen]

Way to fund the eventing perhaps, and get your kit cleaned at the same time!

Maybe H&H should do an article on it

 

[Mickyjoe]

Jesus!!! I've heard it all now!!

 

[Lolo]

I'm dying of laughter here... If I expire before I've got my money's worth at uni, I'm blaming you!

Honestly, if I got a call like that, all he'd be hearing is heavy breathing too... Because I'd be so far gone in fits of laughter I would be struggling to breathe!

 

[Olivio]

I'm sorry, that made me laugh too and reminded me of when I tried to sell my long leather riding boots. I was asked all sorts of questions like whether I wore them in the house, if they would fit his amazon girlfriend and he then went on to describe said amazon!

So bad but you have to feel sorry for these people who have nothing better to do with their time than trawl adverts!

 

[jessamess]

HAHA I've never heard of this before would someone would someone like the fill me in!!!

Sounds hilarious!!!

xxxx

 

[Quadro]

Ive had this phonecall as well asking about livery for his wifes horse and would we whip it etc!!
He must have a very large...................phonebill!!
Q

 

[kez1001]

hahahaha sorry but so so funny!

years ago i worked in a tack shop and we got a couple of calls like this about whips and long riding boots! some people are so pervy!!

 

[ajn1610]

Why didn't you take them up on the £500 to clean your boots? I'd have definitely agreed to that!

In all seriousness you should probably report the call on the face of it it seems fairly harmless but not everyone would take it as well as you have. This is the sort of thing that would really disturb some people.

Where I used to stable my horse there was a bridle path that looped round and a guy used to sit in his car and wait for someone to go through one gate and then station himself at the other, completely naked apart from a cape and a zorro mask! He was arrested in the end. I was never too worried about it, he wasn't threatening and didn't approach you or anything but some of the others on the yard were really freaked out by it.

 

[diggerbez]

Why didn't you take them up on the £500 to clean your boots? I'd have definitely agreed to that!

In all seriousness you should probably report the call on the face of it it seems fairly harmless but not everyone would take it as well as you have. This is the sort of thing that would really disturb some people.

Where I used to stable my horse there was a bridle path that looped round and a guy used to sit in his car and wait for someone to go through one gate and then station himself at the other, completely naked apart from a cape and a zorro mask! He was arrested in the end. I was never too worried about it, he wasn't threatening and didn't approach you or anything but some of the others on the yard were really freaked out by it.

^^^^ OMG there are some right wierdos in the world aren't there. i used to work in a call centre and calls to our number were 50p a minute and we used to get all sorts of kinky calls- i hasten to add it was a reputable mobile phone company that i worked for

 

[dibbin]

We get them occasionally at the riding school ... a woman once phoned asking if she could learn how to ride her hubby ...

 

[Muchadoaboutnothing]

I think I can top you lot.

I had an bridle up for sale but had my e-mail up. I got sent a picture of a very dirty old man on all fours wearing a bridle with a woman on top 'riding' him

I really wish I kept that picture to show you all

 

[Festive_Felicitations]

PMSL!!

I realise being on the recieving end might be a bit gross, but reading this from the safety of Australia - its hilarious!!!
I wish I'd got 'interesting' phonecalls like that when I worked at a Riding School would have made the day ALOT more interesting!!

 

[imr]

Over the years he must be one of the phone company's best customers .... he must be glad you can get yellow pages on the internet now rather than having to buy all those phone books to look for livery yards !

When my mum had a yard a guy like this called - of course Im sweet and innocent student trying to sound professional and start off answering his "livery enquiry" very diligently and seriously and it then degenerates into the whip it stuff at which point I do finally cotton on and hang up ! And then promptly start laughing with my mum!

This was 15 years ago maybe - kind of hope its the same weirdo whose been doing it for years because otherwise it means there's more than one ring ring whip it freak out there !!

Cant beat the zorro cape guy story (!) but when I was about 14 I was out hacking and a guy drove past then turned the car round and drove slowly back. Now the road was a cul de sac leading to a bridleway so I figured he was lost and when he wound down the window I figured he wanted directions. Erm , no. He says to me "how about a ride on this then?" only I dont really hear him properly/cant believe my ears so he has to repeat himself at which point I look into the car and see that its all hanging out in its fully "alert" state...not what I really wanted to see. He scarpered when I screamed at him to ******* off and walloped the roof of his car with my whip. I just dont get it, there are some very odd people out there....!

 

[kyanya]

I find it hard to believe our horsey activities are the stuff of some people's fantasies!

A while ago I had an ad on the Internet looking for a share horse. Only call I ever got from it was a guy asking if I wear riding boots. He can come down the yard and see me in my boots after I've ridden - I guarantee stinky me with sweaty hat hair won't be what he's picturing! Certainly does nothing for my OH!

 

[Tempi]

I've heard this story quite a few times, wonder if its always the same guy or if there are more of ''them'' out there

Although on a serious note it is quite disturbing to be honest, what a nutter......

 

[Wowzers]

I was riding along the road one day and a group of guys started saying some very inappropriate things. I promptly pulled up my horse along side them gave them a look and said, in my most prim and proper accent, "...well I very much doubt you can match this horse power between my legs" and trotted off up the road head held high! Silly sods didn't know what to say to that one!

How about if anyone gets a call from this guy in the future something along the lines of "oh no, I wouldn't ever whip them but ____ likes to give them a good beating. She can be contacted on *insert number of local police station*"

 

[Harrie123]

Same guy called me about a horse I had for sale, said his name was Paul Heart, called from a blocked number!

He was very convincing, he said he wanted a hunting horse for his wife. He asked all the right questions, and then some very wrong ones! Like 'how long was my whip', 'where did I keep it', 'did my trainer tell me to whip my horse', 'did I like it'!

I fell for it, took me ages to realise what was going on!

Laughed about it a lot, especially when I told my husband, but could see why some people could find it upsetting.

 

[ClobellsandBaubles]

put up an advert looking for a horse to exercise few days a week etc. got lots of very nice normal replies and one along the line of:
'if this is still what you are in search of email me and see what i have to offer you...'
could not stop giggling much as i hoped it was a stable full of lovely horse i very much doubt it was although many replies came to mind must say i resisted that urge.

 

[TheoryX1]

Its is just so wrong, but I couldnt stop laughing. My PA wanted to know why she could hear these shrieks from my office and wondered who I was talking to. Your poor mum. However, talking of whips, I have heard of a tack shop which now has a 'Top Shelf', ie a room out the back. Apparently they had so many requests for whips etc from lets just say non equestrian individuals who wished to use them in the comfort of their own homes (OK, I will say it, it S & M fetish type people). They ended up opening up this 'Top shelf' department just to meet demand.

Also, I have to confess that I do sometimes leave schooling whips, and on occasion a lunge whip in my car, which although clean, is my mobile, portable tack room. Oh, and my spurs, which I tend to leave in my glove compartment. My business partner had to borrow my car once and decided it would be extremely funny to bring a couple of the whips, plus lunge whip and my spurs into the office to show 'What I got up to at the weekend and evenings'..............

 

[ArcticFox]

LOL!!!!!

It is very funny, weirdo is all i can say!

 

[OneInAMillion]

Oh!!! Rather ermm ahem strange man though!

 

[Smitty]

Why didn't you take them up on the £500 to clean your boots? I'd have definitely agreed to that!

I hate to think what the boots would be cleaned with, or how, and would you want them back?

In all seriousness you should probably report the call on the face of it it seems fairly harmless but not everyone would take it as well as you have. This is the sort of thing that would really disturb some people.

Where I used to stable my horse there was a bridle path that looped round and a guy used to sit in his car and wait for someone to go through one gate and then station himself at the other, completely naked apart from a cape and a zorro mask! He was arrested in the end. I was never too worried about it, he wasn't threatening and didn't approach you or anything but some of the others on the yard were really freaked out by it.

I have been unable to get this image out of my head all day. Did nobody take a photo?

 

[IncaCola]

OMG he has be at this for years. i had the call back in 2007 with exactly the same MO and must have had a 20 minute converstion before I finally hung up. I then found out he had called several other horsey people in the area at that time. Obviously he has now progressed out of Somerset to Wiltshire!

 

[ClobellsandBaubles]

if someone offered me £500 to clean my boots i don't think i would need them back think of the nice new ones you could buy

 

[Stacey02]

Sorry but thats pretty funny - but weird!

Dont worry, where i used to work we had a "foot fettish man" he would call in and ask the girls what footwear they were wearing etc......

In the end our IT/phone techy guys were trying to trace him... so we were advised if we got him on the phone to try and keep him talking, if we were comfortable with that ofcourse.

I never had the pleasure of speaking to him... lol - odd bu99er