Saying Goodbye to them...

Grey_Eventer

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*sighs* a tumour in the throat, bad hips, various lumps all over his body which we think are cancer... I think the end is near for my beloved labrador... my first memory and the best thing to get a hug from (hes like a bear)... im so so scared...
Its been such a good year after a few awful ones... im not sure I can cope without him :(
He means the world to me. I don't know what its like to live without him... :'(
 
He'll always be with you though - my old girl was PTS in 1997 - we'd grown up together, and I still think about her every day - mostly 'I wish there were dogs like D around these days and I would bloody buy one!' x
 
Someone posted this poem in New Lounge. I had a good bawl at it because my old cat is getting put down tomorrow. Utterly devasted is an understatement for how I feel and life won't be the same without my little partner in crime around.

If it should be that I grow weak
And pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then you must do what must be done,
For this last battle cannot be won.

You will be sad, I understand.
Don't let your grief then stay your hand.
For this day, more than all the rest,
Your love for me must stand the test.

We've had so many happy years.
What is to come can hold no fears.
You'd not want me to suffer so;
The time has come -- please let me go.

Take me where my need they'll tend,
And please stay with me till the end.
Hold me firm and speak to me,
Until my eyes no longer see.

I know in time that you will see
The kindness that you did for me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I've been saved.

Please do not grieve -- it must be you
Who had this painful thing to do.
We've been so close, we two, these years;
Don't let your heart hold back its tears.
 
I was given a copy of this poem when we had our family dog PTS in 1997. I still get quite teary reading it :( but it does put into words beautifully about doing what's best for your doggy best friend. I'm going to have to make the same decision this year with my old girl.
I'm dreading it. But it's the final kindness we can do for them :(


http://www.poeticexpressions.co.uk/POEMS/If it should be I grow frail and weak.htm
 
Someone posted this poem in New Lounge. I had a good bawl at it because my old cat is getting put down tomorrow. Utterly devasted is an understatement for how I feel and life won't be the same without my little partner in crime around.

If it should be that I grow weak
And pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then you must do what must be done,
For this last battle cannot be won.

You will be sad, I understand.
Don't let your grief then stay your hand.
For this day, more than all the rest,
Your love for me must stand the test.

We've had so many happy years.
What is to come can hold no fears.
You'd not want me to suffer so;
The time has come -- please let me go.

Take me where my need they'll tend,
And please stay with me till the end.
Hold me firm and speak to me,
Until my eyes no longer see.

I know in time that you will see
The kindness that you did for me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I've been saved.

Please do not grieve -- it must be you
Who had this painful thing to do.
We've been so close, we two, these years;
Don't let your heart hold back its tears.

yes that's the same 1 I have linked to :)
 
I know that poem so well, always make me well up. I haven't read it tonight as still too raw from having Buffy pts last month.
So sorry you are facing this Grey Eventer, it is the hardest part of owning a dog, and no one will tell you it is easy, but in some ways when you are dreading losing them it is actually a strange sort of relief when they are finally at peace. It will take time but eventually you will be able to look back at all your happy memories of your time together, and as CC says he will always be with you.
 
This is the heartbreaking outcome of having dogs we love, my old brown bear had mobility problems and I rang the vet several times for appointments only to cancel as he seemed better.

Eventually he got worse and we had him put down, I always think its the greatest gift we can give our dog a painless death with people he loves and trusts.
You have given him a lovely life and in return you have been blessed with a wonderful friend, my heart goes out to you.
 
That poem made me cry! its beautiful. I just don't know what it'll be like without him, the worst bit is he has awful days then like today hes so happy and it makes it so hard to know what to do, because i know hes in pain, his hips are so sore, but hes so happy...
Hes been such a huge part of my life so far, basically my whole childhood...im just scared of what itll be like without him...
I don't deal with these sorts of things well... weve lost so many horses and dogs in the past and i don't want to lose another. :(
 
OMG - this is such a sad post! I have six dogs, the oldest of which is only six. The only dog I've loved and lost was very, very many years ago and she was only six - she was diabetic and despite daily insulin injections, she just got worse and worse. I cannot bear the thought of losing any of my dogs (or horses or cats) but equally I cannot bear to see them suffer. You will know when the time is right - I did, and I loved my little creatures (horses/cats) to bits! I was so upset when my 16 year old cat died that I couldn't bring myself to tell anyone and couldn't pick up his ashes from the vet for nine months!!!! However, everyone is different......my closest friend loved her dogs so much that she cannot bear to replace them yet and is "dog-less" at the moment, but I am the opposite - I'd want a puppy to fill that gap immediately.....a puppy to make you laugh and bring you happiness......you can never replace THAT dog but a newcomer will ease the loss. Thinking of you at this sad time......
 
We had to have our beautiful old dog put down in January. My mum and Dad set the date and we made his last week with us as special as it could possibly be. It made it easier than when we lost our old bitch unexpectedly, we knew we had done all we could to say goodbye and show him we loved him. Someone posted this poem for me:

The greatest gift
I always knew this time would come,
From the very first time our eyes first met.
How I loved you then! How I love you now!

I made a promise then and I keep that promise now.
You will not suffer from a pain that will not heal,
You will not know the loss of a life remembered, now gone.
It's for me alone to make this decision,
The price for the bright joy and pure laughter
You brought me during the time we shared.
I am the only one who can decide when it is time.
When my hope dies, and my fears ride high,
Just when I need you most, I must let you go.

It's for you alone to tell me when you are ready,
For without your guidance, I will not know
When to lay my grief, my guilt, my anger,
My sorrow and my selfish heart aside
And give you the last gift, the greatest gift.
Your eyes will speak to mine, and I will know.

The pain of this moment is excruciating.
Tears stream down my face in a river of sorrow,
And my heart drowns in a pool of grief.
For you have spoken and I have listened.
And unlike other decisions I have made,
This one brings no relief, no comfort, and no peace

For if there's one thing I have learned,
Unconditional love has a condition after all.

I must be willing to let you go when you speak to me.
I must accept my pain so you can be free of yours.

Go easily now, go quickly now,
Do not linger here, it is time for you to leave.
Go find the ones who have gone before you.
You are free to leave me now, free to let your spirit soar,
I pray I will find comfort in my memories,
In the dark and lonely days ahead.

I cannot say I will not miss you, I cannot say I will not cry,
For only my tears can heal my broken heart.
But I promise you this: as long as I live, you will live
Alive in my mind, forever in my heart.

And this will be my greatest gift,
Sending you away.
Is this the measure of my unconditional love,
For only the greatest love can say
Good-bye.
Go find the rainbow bridge
We'll meet again.

Loving you has been the greatest gift of all.
 
We were in EXACTLY the same position last year with our labrador. She is 14 and I was 19 so she had been with me through our entire life. Some days she looked so good and happy but in the end she couldnt control her bladder and got really upset with herself when she accidently wet and she could barely walk.
She lasted until november so just after her birthday and we made the hard descion to take her to the vet. We all had a feeling it was her time to go and the night before I went and said goodbye when it was just us.
It was always the right thing to do as we saw her when she was so so happy when she was younger and she just looked so uncomfortable and miserable so she is much happier now.

What also makes it easier was that a month or so before she was put down we got a new puppy to keep our other dog company so the other dog wouldn't get lonely when our lab was put down so when poppy was put down all our concentration went on the new puppy.

I will always remember her as such a good job. we loved her so much that 6 months later we bought another black labrador who may live up to what poppy meant to us.
 
We have another lab and my parents gave me a border terrier puppy for my birthday... we are still undecided as to wehn the date is, i just know its time, but the vets want to try him on anti biotics for this cough he has which i think is something in his throat (another tumour or something) but they seem to be treating it as a cough cough- tablets are huge and making no difference at all... apparently we have to asses each problem on its own, so hes not allowed anything to ease the pain in his joints. I think its time to go back to the vet as hes not comfortable and is always panting, which i don't think is a good sign.
It sounds awful but I just feel it would be kinder to him... hes got such sore hips and i took him out for a potter the other day by himself and he fell over :( and he struggles to get up now... but its so hard because hes so happy in himself, its just his hips are so sore :( *sighs* what to do.
 
Doesn't sound awful at all, it sounds like you are a caring owner.
I think when, especially big, weight bearing dogs, cannot support themselves, it is not nice for them, to be honest I would be having a good chat with your vet x
 
Apola"ies in advance Ive a few keys not workin". Some vets take t"e biscuit, I t"ink you are absolutely correct your boy is not enjoyin" life anymore and a decision "as to be made soon. Better a day too early t"an a day too late.
 
so, so sorry for you, we all know how hard it is. the vets only see them for a very short time so perhaps dont realise how bad all of his problems are. you know your dog and if YOU feel his quality of life is not good then dont feel bad, tell your vet what you want to do. when my last dog was 15 1/2 i knew in my heart that the spark had gone out of her and asked my vet to pts, he then said he was pleased i had decided because he felt it was time but they are in a difficult position and are not really supposed to decide for us. sorry hope thatmakes sense. im not telling you to pts but just putting it from the vets point of view as well. whatever you decide my thoughts are with you.....lots of hugs!!!!!!
 
CC- it is a problem for him as he is a big labrador- hes not overweight at all, probably a bit skinny but hes just a very big build and this does nothing to help his hips! :(
splashgirl i totally agree, I think a lot of owners do try and do everything before PTS but I just dont think at nearly 13 years old that its fair and when we find out that he has cancer/tumours in other places than we know of, there isn't anything you can do, realistically.
Im taking him to the vets tomorrow and asking for a particular vet that I like- oddly she's newly qualified but I find her much more understanding of the situation than the slightly older vets.
Has anyone ever had their dog PTS at home? He hates the vets and id rather he went in a quiet relaxed way rather than all anxious...
 
Thank you CC.
Here are some pics of him <3


Photo0026.jpg


Photo0311.jpg


P1000079.jpg
 
Beautiful boy, Grey_Eventer :)

Unfortunately its a decision we have to make as owners and the responsibility we take on when we get a pet. I'm dreading it coming to my two.

Sat here in tears now I've known that poem ("If it should be that I grow old and weak, and pain should wake me from my sleep..") by heart since about the age of 4 or 5 when we lost our first Goldie in an accident - it never fails to make me cry and that last one posted is just beautiful.

I hope once you make your decision, everything goes as well as it possibly can.
K x
 
Thinking of you at this sad time. Been there with cats and horses - love 'em all! As I said in my first post, only dog I've loved and lost was very many years ago (1978, I think) and all my current dogs are, at the oldest, six. I well remember my vet ringing me one Sunday afternoon when my daughter's first - and elderly - pony was an in-patient at his "hospital"- daughter had moved onto a larger pony but loved her first pony DESPERATELY....."I think the time has come, the little mite's suffering". My daughter, aged only 12 then, wanted to see her one last time and the vet said I should let here.....we arrived at his "hospital", daughter armed with carrots - I couldn't go in - God, I loved that pony! - daughter went into the barn where the in-patients were stabled, called her name, and she answered, tried to get up but couldn't. I thought my daughter would me with her for ages but she emerged, grief-stricken, within minutes. We loved that pony - Dolly - so much (she was a superstar) but we had to let her go. Gosh - I've had to grab a tissue just typing about her!

We love them to bits, but we have to let them go when the time comes. Dolly was put to sleep by injection on the 15th December 2001......just a couple of days ago, I found a photograph album and inside were photos of Dolly and my daughter had written, many years ago, "Dolly, the best pony ever". We still have her ashes. Tissue time!
 
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