Scared to bring my horse home :(

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Ilovefoals

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I'm in a bit of a dilemma and could do with some advice.

I moved my mare to a livery yard last March in order to rebreak her as I needed the help of the resident trainer. I then had regular lessons til she was going well and then took her home. At home she was a nightmare. Very bolshy, difficult to handle, problems with napping and planting in the school so eventually gave in and took her back to livery.

Since then, she went lame and had surgery for PSD so I took her home in July last year to recouperate but when it came to riding her again, it was back to square one with the napping and bad behaviour. Again I moved her back to the livery yard (November) but the trainer was away so I had to get on with things myself. And we have! No bad behaviour, settled in her stable, and my confidence has grown.

However, I'm increasingly unhappy with the yard, my instructions are rarely followed, the schools are booked a lot and the bitchiness is getting me down. I'm paying out a lot of money which is crazy since I have my own stables etc but she's so settled there. Like a completely different horse!

I'm scared to bring her home incase she goes back to being a monster again :( It'd be so much easier for me as of course she'd be on my door step, less money, plus I have another one at home which I ride so it would mean less time spent going between home and the yard. But what do I do if she goes back to her old ways? Am I destined not to keep her at home? Help!!!!
 
Have you tried getting the trainer down to teach you at home, or get them to ride at your place?

Have you tried following the same routine as the livery yard at our place?
 
If you take her home she will just take a bit of time to settle. Just give her that. Get her into a routine quickly so she feels secure. You seem to be making extra work for yourself by having the 2 seperate. try and relax, if you are getting your knickers in a twist about what is going to happen now you are home she will pick up on that. You could get regular lessons at your own place to help with your confidence with her. i take it you have somewhere to have lessons.
 
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Is this a big livery yard ? Some horses find it hard to settle in a quiet home environment. I always thought horses must surely love being in a small personal yard with plenty of 1-1 attention, but I bought a horse once, who did nothing but fret and fence walk until she went back to a busy livery yard.
 
Lu 1 - The trainer has never ridden her here but I'm sure she would. I haven't tried making things the same as the yard yet but intend too this time. There she gets individual turnout so I'm going to try that here. The last time I had her home there was only her and my yearling. Now I have 2 grass liveries and one on full which I also ride so hoping that might settle her more???

Chestnuttymare - I'm stressing beyond belief! You are right in that I need to establish a routine and stick to it. It's what she's used to now. I have an outdoor school and could definitely get my trainer here once a week for help.

Big Red - Yes, it's a huge yard. Constant coming and going. Shows, clinics, lorries, people. Everything you'd think a sharp horse would hate except she loves it!
 
The 2 extra horse might make a big difference. If it is a youngster she was with before it might have made her feel a bit vulnerable. Too much pressure as she knows she can't rely on it. If the other two are older, it will take the pressure off her to keep things safe. You will be fine, I know it is really stressful but it will be fine, you can get your trainer to come over and you can also try and get her in the same sort of routine that she is used to. In a few weeks, you will wonder what you were worried about and you can go shopping with the money you save!
 
At home I have 2 ponies on grass livery, a shetland, my 2yr old and a friends warmblood who is stabled. My elderly mare who was out on loan is also coming home and will also be stabled. When my mare was at home before, there was only her and the youngster which could have contributed to her behaviour.

I'm planning for the end of the month. I have a lesson at another yard which will be the first time I've ridden her in a different place. So I thought I'd wait til after that incase she's unsettled when she comes home and I chicken out of taking her to the lesson.
 
I think I would do the same as some have suggested on here. I would take her back to the yard I was happy with and get my instructor to come out and give me a lesson or ride my horse as often as needed then reduce to the number of lessons you would normal have as things progress. I really hope you have some luck and the situation sorts it's self out nicely for you. Good luck x x x
 
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