Scared to canter! Help!

[Verity&Lifa]

I'm 30yrs old and am fulfilling a lifetime's ambition to learn to ride. My friend from school has loaned me her 21yo 15.3hh Latvian mare, Lifa. I love her to bits, we have bonded, and have just started lessons with an instructor down the lane. I've had her on loan for a couple of months now, and go to her every day to groom, feed her etc. So far we've had 2 hour long lessons, and in the school I feel confident because I trust my instructor.

Last year I was riding my friend's other horse, a 17.2hh mare, who bolted with me when I was doing a no stirrups exercise, and I fell off. It seemed a LONG way to fall, and I was frightened to get back on. Lifa is a much better height for me, and I think we have bonded over all the grooming and ground work. She isn't a nasty horse, she's just excited to be back in work after a period off.

When I started riding her on my own, I limited it to a walk/trot down the lane and back, except for our hour lesson each week where we've been trotting around the school wit lots of obstacles etc. I think Lifa was getting bored of going up and down the lane. One day the trot seemed too fast for my liking, so I made the mistake of sitting down and she interpreted this as canter. I panicked, and practically held onto her mane not to fall off. We came to a halt, I dismounted, and led her back.

Yesterday I went down the bridle path for the first time with my friend and a young horse - Lifa's son. I was behind, and Lifa was very forward as she used to know to canter all the way back up the hill. After my two bad and unprepared experiences in canter, I didn't feel ready. It was really hard to keep her in walk/trot, and she "bounced" a few times, because as I shortened my reins, she thought we were going faster.

It seems there are so many things to think about - breathing, sitting up straight, heels down, not panicking when everything inside me tells me to panic!!

I love riding, and I want to enjoy it, but I'm beginning to wonder whether I will ever canter and enjoy it. I'm going out in an hour to do the same thing down the bridle path, and I find myself anxious that I won't be able to do it, or we'll tank off and I'll fall. I think these things are so much more terrifying when learning as an adult.

I really want to do it, it just seems so fast ....... and I don't want my friend thinking I'm scared or useless.

Help, please!

 

[Littlelegs]

Get your instructor to get you cantering in a school first. On the lunge is sometimes physically harder because you're on a circle, but for confidence might be better because you know somebody else is in control of the horse. Have a word with your instructor & see if she thinks you're best having a go on the lunge or in a normal lesson. That way she'll be on hand to give you tips. I find with a fear of cantering, it sometimes can very quickly change to an adrenaline rush once you've had a few enjoyable experiences, then there'll be no stopping you!

 

[Tinsel Trouble]

one simple tip:

ABORT THE FOETAL POSITION!! That way you can absorb every movement and stay balanced!!

Canter the exciting for the horse- and will be for your horse once you let her- she may bounce for a stride, but it's not the big frightening thing you've made it out to be. Just sit up, chin up and look ahead!!

 

[bushbaby28]

I agree with Littlelegs. A lunge lesson would be great as you can focus purely on your position and sitting up and enjoying it, then slowly introduce back into giving the aids and being able to sit up, then eventually go out and have a bit of fun.

Ultimately there is no pressure to canter - take your time and do it when YOU want to do it.

 

[charmeroo]

Don't even think about canter until you are completely ready!! If you only hack in walk and trot your horse will accept that that is what hacking is about. It does take time to build up trust between you and your horse - and thus definitely time for you to build confidence!! In many ways I think that cantering in the school can be just as scary as you have to go round corners! I've found that the best place to canter for the first time is out on you own on a hack (so you don't have to worry what the other horse/rider might do) and up the steepest hill you can find (providing the ground is good enough). That way you know that the horse will stop by the time you get to the top!! Alternatively, a long steady slope will do just as well. Good luck - but don't feel you have to rush these things!

 

[Hovis_and_SidsMum]

The key thing is not to curl up or tighten up on the reins etc as you may be signalling canter whether you want to or not!

Like others have said ask your instructor to help with canter in the school but actually i find cantering out is much easier as its in a straight line and after the inital "jump" into canter they can settle and its the easiest pace to sit to when they steady into it
It might be worth having a balance strap so you can hang onto that and not hang off the horses mouth which may upset her. Your instructor can also work on your position so you dont feel so out of control. do you drive? Remember what it was like leanring to drive - all those things to think about and do at the same time. Bet you do them all now without thinking about it dont you? Riding is the same

But if you dont want to canter dont feel pressurised into it. You're not useless or being silly - its a big thing and theres no rule book saying you EVER have to canter if you dont want to. Do it when you're ready to do it - I didnt canter for a long time out hacking and now love it!

 

[xxMozlarxx]

. I find with a fear of cantering, it sometimes can very quickly change to an adrenaline rush once you've had a few enjoyable experiences, then there'll be no stopping you!

Agree! same with jumping.

 

[starryeyed]

It's very easy to get yourself worked up with nerves when you build anything up, so try your very hardest to relax - try taking some rescue remedy before cantering as I find that really helps me settle when I'm nervous about anything. Try not to tense up if she starts to rush, I know it's easier said than done but tensing up will give the "go!!!" signal to a horse. Deep breaths really help with this.
It's important not to rush things, please don't feel as if you have to canter because you don't want your friend to think you're useless - you had a scary experience and you need to feel confident enough to give it a go at your own pace, she won't look down on you for that. It's better to go slowly and take your time than to rush things and knock your confidence.
You say you trust your instructor, I'd have a word with her and see what she advises about cantering - I too was going to suggest maybe having a canter/lunge lesson, as that way you'll feel reassured that there's somebody in the middle holding on "just in case" - and you can only go in a circle, there won't be any changes of direction - saying this, it may be tricky for you at first to balance on a circle in canter. Is she easy to stop? - you could maybe just try cantering down the long side and coming back to trot for the corner and short side, with your instructor there to advise you?
I've babbled a bit but hope I've been of some help! Good luck, I'm sure that once you get to canter there will be no stopping you x

 

[JFTDWS]

What littlelegs said - instructor, consider lunge lessons (if mare is nice and balanced!) or at least get some guidance from your instructor. I'd also add in, a neckstrap or balance strap, so you're not hanging on her mouth and upsetting her, then just sit up and go with the flow Don't rush into it, but when you feel ready, just smile, look up and enjoy it.

It's very hard to adopt the foetal position if you're smiling and looking up at the world in front of you

 

[Botters]

I went through a stage of being scared to canter when I first had my new horse after a 3 year break.

Cantering in the school is the best option, I realised my horse was going faster because I was tensing up, leaning forward and actually encouraging her to go faster.

So I had a word with myself, and I physically had to force myself to relax, lean back and breathe. Once I had tricked us both by pretending to be relaxed I found it much easier.

Canter shouldn't be much faster than your trot, and actually it is much more comfortable and less bouncy than trot.

Don't put pressure on yourself, and if you feel like just popping into canter then just do it!

Also make sure your trot is slow and active before cantering, not fast and flat, so you don't already feel out of balance

 

[Patterdale]

Ditto littlelegs.
Also dont worry about it. There are no 'canter police' to give u deadline, and no rush. Worrying about something like this just turns it into a massive big deal and makes it worse.

Give it time and enjoy the walking and trotting. Your confidence will grow but just take baby steps

And make sure you find an understanding instructor who isn't going to pressurise you.

Good luck!

 

[pixiebee]

often when you tense you will grip with your lower legs without realising, make a conscious point of relaxing your lower leg away from the horse, sit up shoulders back, half halts, not constant pulling as this will make the horse tense too and most importantly smile!!! if it helps you can stand up a little in your stirrups so the first canter wont feel so bouncy but sit up nice and tall, even sing if you have to, this helps you relax!!

 

[mollyblob]

I can really sympathise with this, having had several crises (is that a word?!) of confidence over the years. Ditto everything above, especially not feeling hurried into "having" to canter. It's supposed to be fun!

Definitely cantering in the school first, and a neck strap. And a back protector if you have one- makes me feel much more confident! And I'm often braver hacking on my own, maybe no pressure to "perform"? And I pick my hacking buddies carefully.

After a particularly bad confidence phase a while back I eventually cracked cantering out on hacks by myself. I picked a sloping section of field which my horse knew usually meant "Let's go!"- traditionally we'd always done a little leap over the ditch then cantered to the gate. Which now terrified me! So we walked up and down that section for aaaages (think up and down several times a week for a several weeks!). Walk, halt, walk, halt, few steps back, walk... Lots of jogging sideways to start with, but I just tucked a hand under the neck strap, kept breathing, kept my legs long, reins relaxed, occasional big sighs to calm us both, "aaaand relax, breathe, you're fine, SIT UP!" on loop in my head. Eventually, that section was a total non-event for both of us. Gradually I introduced a few strides of trot into our unexciting routine.

One day, without even thinking about it, a few yards from the gate I just popped her into canter. Not even an issue- she'd resigned herself to the fact that I wasn't any fun any more, so we were both totally relaxed when we eventually did it. And I knew she could only go a couple of strides before we had to stop because of the gate.

Just the fact that I'd not only achieved a few strides of calm, controlled canter, but I'd also made the decision to do it totally by myself with no pressure, made a massive difference to my confidence. I was much happier about trying a little canter after that, until eventually I found myself deliberately picking certain routes so we could have the longest and fastest canters

 

[Jericho]

Agree with everything everyone has said - don't rush into cantering if you don't feel readyand dont hunch into foetal position gripping with knees and hands as they assume you want to go faster! In my youngeR days (am now 37) I would bomb about like a loony with no fear but nowadays cantering on a hack has to be well planned out and I am full of what ifs etc. Very sad really as I always feel great after a good canter.

I know it sounds wierd to compare you to an 8yr old but my daughter is going through exactly the same issue as you after a couple of scary canters. Her instructor let's her canter down the long side of a school and then return to trot then rebalance and repeat. As she gets better they add the short side in until she feels confident to keep goingt. I asked her about lunging and she said that unless the horse/ pony is very steady then most get quite xcited about cantering and are quite unbalanced ona small circle and tend to motorbike which makes it more difficult to sit too as forces are pushing you outwards. My daughtEr certainly found that. One of her best canters has been on a hack on an uphill grass track with high banks on either side and me standing at a big five bar gate at the end. Friend led her down and they started walking, then trotting and then the pony settled into a nice canter, leader tailed off, daughter settled and enjoyed it as she knew the pony would stop at the end.

But this pony we know has brakes. With mine she tends to go faster and faster if i hang on her mouth out of nerves because I think she is going too fast and I have found that if I relax and let her go a little more freely the fight disappears and she settles and actually comes back to trot very sweetly.

Good luck and hope you start to enjoy it soon.

 

[Goldenstar]

I should really stay out of this one as I can't understand why people who are scared ride however my advice would be.
1 the mare is not getting enough work you need to remedy this somehow.
2 I would advise joining a group lesson at a riding school and taking lunge lessons there. LUnge lesson are a great way to work on balance and strengthen your position which is the route to more confidence and riding in a group at similar level to you helps learning and is fun at a riding school you will ride different horses which helps with confidence.
Meanwhile hack out the mare as much as you can it will also help if the mare is voice trained well so you can stop her with your voice get someone experianced to help you.
Good luck you need to work and perseverance with this and you will get though.

 

[seoirse]

Hi there, my Mum went back to riding in her late 40s after a massive break of over 20 years. She eventually took on my sisters outgrown pony and hacked her out for the last 4 years. She hasn't cantered once! She's quite happy just walking and trotting.
I'm not saying you should write it off altogether like my Mum (she was like a brick wall - we did try to pursuade her to try a canter!!) but perhaps just park it for now, as its causing you so much stress, there is still lots you can do without having to canter, and eventually you will get bored of NOT cantering and you'll probably just feel its time to give it a go!
Good luck. Confidence is such a fragile thing but sounds like you are already doing great if you are hacking out etc and you've not long been learning. Good luck x

 

[lizziegoos]

Ditto littlelegs.
Also dont worry about it. There are no 'canter police' to give u deadline, and no rush. Worrying about something like this just turns it into a massive big deal and makes it worse.

Give it time and enjoy the walking and trotting. Your confidence will grow but just take baby steps

And make sure you find an understanding instructor who isn't going to pressurise you.

Good luck!

exactly this post & Littlelegs. I was the same as you a few months ago and with a change of instructor I now look forward to cantering rather than before I dreaded it so much, gave the horse all the wrong instructions and it was scary unpleasurable experience making me more scared to canter again and its a viscious circle then. I now repeat out loud what my new instructor says (as she makes me laugh), I sing then off into canter and I cant stop smiling. Cantering was my biggest fear in returning to riding after 15 year break and I now love it.To me I overcome it quicker learning to deep breath hense not tensing up & a new intructor who wasnt a bully like my last one who used to call me a "wally & useless". take your time & you will enjoy it

 

[Lego]

I had a very similar problem a couple of months ago... I had a bad fall whilst viewing, and being a bit nervous anyway, especially with new horses, I didn't get on very well with my new horse and even a faster walk felt as if he was going to bolt off with me... To my embarassment, when I could force myself on, I spent weeks only walking in the arena if someone came in with me and eventually decided enough was enough and I either needed to man up a bit or sell him...

Eventually I decided that the horse was nothing I shouldn't be able to cope with, so if I didn't want to go faster there was no rush as long as I was enjoying him. I got someone else to ride him occasionally, and spent a while on groundwork to make sure he was really listening to me and voice trained - and it made me much more aware of my effect on him and how quickly he relaxed if I did!

First canter was a slight cheat - since my default panic position is hunch and hands up by my chin, I lunged first then trotted till he was tired - then got as much mane and balance strap in my hands as I could, and cantered part of the long side towards the gate - knowing full well he'd stop at the gate if I didn't keep him moving! Mental commentary of oh god please stop please stop sit up please stop After all the stress it was pretty anticlimatic! I just kept doing that for a while until I wanted to do more - gradually started asking further before the gate, then keeping him going past it until I managed a full circuit.

Just don't let anyone push you too far and scare you - it'll come eventually. After nearly a year I managed my first outdoors canter in company recently - think I swore the whole way and almost couldn't untangle my hands from my chicken strap but still grinning

 

[CathySirett]

Some great advice here -- I find lunge lessons and seat lessons REALLY help in increasing confidence -- and there are also some school exercises you can do as well that will help so your isntructor should be able to help you with this...

for confidence stuff in general take a look at this Confidence Blog -- effectivehorsemanship.wordpress.com

some interseting stuff about confidence on there

meanwhile do lots of walk and trot riding - that will help build your confidence too!

Cathy