Scary day and feel so guilty... advice please

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hula

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Hi

Two days ago, had a rather eventful scary hack out on the borrowed cob that I ride. Went out with a friend and was 5-10 minutes away from the yard, plodding down the usual track, when we noticed (well horses noticed first), that donkeys had just moved into the field. Both horses were very nervous and unsure but with a bit of encouragement and some fuss they walked past, cob first friend horse causing a bit more of a fuss behind. Friends horse seemed quite happy to follow Mr Cob past these scaries in the field and was a couple of paces behind, both horses were nervous and Mr Cobs heart was practically jumping out of his chest but he was a really good boy. We both had hold of the reins in that "I've got hold of you but I don't want you to know I have hold of you".

We had just got past the field when the donkeys decided to have some sort of screaming match between themselves. At this point friends horse bolted, clipping the back end of Mr Cob in the process, Mr Cob decided he should run for his life too bless him. He only got about 10 paces when he slipped on some mud, lost his footing and went down head first, with me coming off face planting the floor. By the time I'd come to my senses he'd continued running down the track. I hobbled to the bottom of the track (200 yards) to see if I could see either friend or horses, no luck.

At this point I rang the yard owner and explained what had happened, she told me to stay put and she would come down. I rang my friend who I was out with whilst waiting for YO but there was no answer. YO arrived and looked shocked and put me in the car. Then I got a call from another lady from the yard to say both horses had arrived back at the yard, with no riders. Honestly have never ever been so worried in the whole of my life about my friend and rang her again and again.

YO took me back to yard, and friend had appeared after a local farmer had given had seen her fall and given her a lift.

Mr Cob was very wound up and had cut his face and scuffed both his front legs, he was also lame in his left hind. I rang his owner to explain and she came straight down. She was quite rightly concerned about him but told me accidents happen and not to worry. We patched him up and YO told me to go home and that she would keep an eye on him.

That was 2 days ago, and he is still lame, and his hind leg hot, there does not appear to be any swelling although it is tender to touch, and he is weight bearing. He seems to be eating fine and drinking, and apart from being a little quiet in not bad shape. Owner and YO are keeping a close eye on him, and are not too worried as yet, but I am because I feel responsible.

However, I am feeling like the guiltiest person in the world. It scared the life out of me, the thought of someone getting hurt, it felt all so out of control. I'm worried that this might give Mr Cob a permanent fear about the donkeys. I'm replaying the morning over and over in my head... thinking what if I had stayed on, what if I'd moved Mr Cob to one side before it happened. I just feel really responsible. This is my first fall since getting back in the saddle november.

Mr Cobs owner is fantastic and encouraged me to get back in the saddle this time around. I've ridden Mr Cob for the last 3 years on and off, and he's now starting to get on a bit (21 this year), and although he gives confidence its not without a large chunk of character to go with it, and he certainly is not the easiest.

I don't know what to do, I don't think this has dented my confidence (although I havn't been back on since as I've really hurt my back) but I just feel responsible for the whole thing :( and think am I really good enough to ride out for someone else. I've been to the yard twice a day to check on him since and I am keeping in touch with his owner, but I just feel like I should/could be doing something extra.

Anyone got any advice?
 
sounds like a really scary accident, this is what it was though, an accident. There wasn't really any more you could have done. I can understand that it will have dented your confidence, it is a very fragile thing. As soon as mr cob is ok, get back on and get going again. There is nothing to say that anything will happen like this again, look at it as a one off, and it was not your fault. You're not responsible for your friend, she knows the risk and chooses, like the rest of us, to ride. Of course you were worried that she got back safely, that's just natural. The main thing is that she did and you are both ok along with the horses.
 
Oh lord what a scare!!!!!!

There was NO way you could ever have thought anything like that would happen!!! My cob has fallen over with me before now, at least you tend to stay on until you hit the ground so it is not as bad as going staight out the side door!

I was riding along a road i go down quite a lot when my horse started playing up , I pushed him forward beacuse I could see nothing. He went sidewards in to the hedge and then i saw two glous old spot pigs in the field by the road!!! They have now gone the way of most pigs.... but it did put me off that route for a bit.

I would either go a diffrent way or go there and lead pass the donks until he is bored of them......My god they do make a noice don't they!!!

This is not your fault, I think you did everything right.....bad luck!!!

nice YO and owner you have there!!
 
Stop worrying! What happened was an "accident" these things happen all the time. Mr Cob may be scared of donkeys for a while but it's nothing that a little patience and perseverance won't overcome. Has he seen the vet about his leg ?? It could have been something underlying that his fall made more prominent ?? He is eating , drinking and putting some weight on it so maybe he just needs a bit more rest before he is right again.

I would say get on him more for your benefit than his

Good luck x
 
Thank you

I just feel like such a faff. I don't know whether this is all coming out because I'm sat feeling sorry for myself, with fractured cheekbone :mad: I think I am a natural worrier, and get far more worried about other people and horses than myself. I also always feel like I have to give 110% all of the time, in regards to everything. So I keep replaying it all, making sure I've done everything right.

And I am now wittering because I feel sorry for myself lol.
 
These things happen - unfortunately there's nothing much you can do - if a horse slips and falls, he slips and falls. You weren't doing anything irresponsible - you were walking along, friend's horse had a paddy, yours went with (totally natural) and stacked it. You shouldn't feel responsible - it can happen to anyone out hacking. He got home safely, it sounds like he's just tweaked something, so it's no major disaster.

Confidence wise, is there somewhere nice and short and non-surprising you can take him for a quiet walk when he's sound? Even just up the drive or round the block - somewhere very familiar for him and short for you. Either take someone on foot or your yard's quietest, calmest hacker to accompany you and take it really slowly. There's no need to push yourself out of your comfort zone too far!

Good luck :)
 
Horseback Rider said:
Stop worrying! What happened was an "accident" these things happen all the time. Mr Cob may be scared of donkeys for a while but it's nothing that a little patience and perseverance won't overcome. Has he seen the vet about his leg ?? It could have been something underlying that his fall made more prominent ?? He is eating , drinking and putting some weight on it so maybe he just needs a bit more rest before he is right again.

I would say get on him more for your benefit than his

Good luck x
Click to expand...

He hasn't seen the vet as yet, owner wants to give him a little more time. Gave him a touch of bute yesterday and this morning as he looked a little uncomfortable, and that seemed to perk him up. He's still eating everything in sight like a hoover which is pleasing to see. We've decided to keep him on box rest until tomorrow, and I'm going to take him out for a walk in hand if he's feeling sensible, as we don't want him to stiffen up...

However, he still managed to roll in his poo overnight...

Has anyone got any other suggestions?
 
You sound like youre having episodes of flashback almost like ptsd.
When they go down, youre better thrown clear, everything probably happened so quickly you couldnt have done anything different anayway, so stop beating yourself up.
Look on the positives, both riders are ok, both horses made their way home.
Cobby boy has probably given himself a good knock and will hopefully be fine in a week or so.
When ever you can, get back on and even if its just for a 5 minute daunder along a well known safe track, go for it.
When the horses have recovered id try the hack again with people on the floor leading if required past the scary donkeys.
If you really feel youre to scared to get back onboard, try NLP its good for this type of mental trauma
 
Ouch you poor poor thing what a horrible incident. Re: donkeys...he may be scared but some horses just are. My girl has shared a field with donkeys in the past and still won't hack past them she is petrified. I think it is the noises the donkeys make. There is NOTHING you could have done....horses spook and accidents happen. I'm not surprised your fella is a bit sore...i would imagine you are feeling quite battered and bruised yourself. perhaps if you are feeling up to it go visit your fella and have some cuddles, commiserate on eachothers' injuries etc. If he is rolling and eating there is probably not a whole pile wrong however maybe ask the owner if you could chat to vet over the phone to put your own mind at rest. A good vet physio is probably more what he needs. Some arnica would be great for the two of you to help with bruising. Re: getting back up, yes do it as soon as you feel able but don't be afraid to admit if you are scared. It is perfectly natural and talking about it helps.
 
He is getting plenty of cuddles :D and he seems to be loving the extra fuss. Going down about 5.30pm to give the fatty his trickle net for the night and see how his leg is.

Thank you for all the comments :) it has made me feel lots better.
 
why give bute which will mask the pain and injury without knowing what the cause is, suggest owner checks to make sure there are no small nicks hidden underneath the hair which could lead to infection and swelling, and check flexion in fetlock and depending on those results get the vet out, but never give bute without advice from the vet first.
 
beeswax said:
why give bute which will mask the pain and injury without knowing what the cause is, suggest owner checks to make sure there are no small nicks hidden underneath the hair which could lead to infection and swelling, and check flexion in fetlock and depending on those results get the vet out, but never give bute without advice from the vet first.
Click to expand...

Hi

We gave a very small touch of bute (actually a pinch from the sachet of YO horse) on the advice of a very very experienced YO and her husband, Cobs owner agreed to it. There does not appear to be any cuts and has been checked very closely twice a day, it is a little sore to the touch and hot, and seems to have full movement. He is on box rest. The heat of his leg suggests an inflammatory response, which could be numerous things, but judging on what happened the other day this is most likely to be down to bruising/impact. Since bute is a NSAID, YO thought it may help with the infammation.

I realise it shouldn't be given without the advice of a vet, but it is not a full dose (not even half) and it is only for the very short term (ie yesterday and today). It seems to have worked a treat.
 
Ive used danilon for a couple of days if i think that there is inflammation there due to a minor injury, ive discussed this with my vet and he's ok with it if used appropriately, i then observe over the 24 - 48 hrs, reassess after 12 hours danilon free and if theres no improvement will get a vet out to discuss further treatment.
Obviously if a condition looked like it was deteriorating id get the vet sooner.
I am happy enough to take on that responsibility and its consequences.
 
Completely agree marydoll :) it is not something we would have even considered without some experienced advice. Vet will be called if his condition doesn't improve. I think even if he is sound later next week we ll give him a couple of extra days in the field, unless of course he's turned into a raging lunatic by then... Which is entirely possible lol.
 
Sounds awful but these sort of things happen to everyone at some time or another. Bute's a great anti-inflammatory and I almost always bute for swelling along with cold hosing and turnout in small paddocks. I don't box rest horses with minor swelling as they can seize up somewhat when movement is restricted like this. Mr Cob will probably be fine in a few days and next time you take him out, go with a good steady horse for the first few rides.
 
Horse falls are often the most frightening because they are completely beyond anyone's control (including the horse's). 10 - 15min cold hose for the hot leg, and how about borrowing a donkey for a few days to do introductions? I "loaned" a pig once, after my horse nearly sat down and died with terror at the sight of one, now they're best pals.
 
Can I suggest that before you hack again you buy Mr Cob some boots to protect his legs. These things happen they are unfortunate but you can help your horse walk away unscathed. Mine face planted on the road today but there isn't a mark on her thanks to her Shires westrop knee brushing boots. Wouldn't hack without them.
 
My friend (who was on here years ago) broke her leg after the eventer she was hacking through her off onto he road. Also agree that I would of given bute for the first day or so. If we fall over and hurt ourselves we would take something. A small amount of bute in my opinion wont mask something serious
 
Hula you don't seem to have more than one person tell you that there are loads and loads (maybe even most?) of horses which are terrified of donkeys, especially if they bray. I used to go for a lesson to an arena near donkeys and if they made any noise, that was the end of the lesson. This isn't your fault, it's just one of those things.

Hope your face and Mr Cob are better soon.
 
OP hope you and Mr Cob both feel better soon. The Old Appy hated donkeys, with a passion. One passed her field one day and she went crazy. It was a good job her field was well bellow the road level, or I am convinced she would have gone over the wall to savage it. I dread to think what she would have done if she had met it out and about :eek: The current Appy is not keen on them, but doesn't have such a severe reaction to them.
Re the bute, we always keep a sachet or two around the place for emergency pain relief
 
That sounds very scary indeed. Thing is it was an accident, so you must try not to beat yourself up about it. I understand it is hard as conscientious people do tend to worry and feel guilty about such things. But you really must not blame yourself.
As said, you do need to get back in the saddle, the sooner the better, you will get your confidence back, be positive :)
 
Hi,

Just been to see the old man, very bright eyed and full of beans. He's tried to get straight into my pockets. leg not so hot but still warmer than it should be. Walked him up and down the yard and lameness has persisted, but being a Hoover tried his very best to get his neighbours tea! Typical. setting him out a small padock in the morning and going to leave him out most of the day. YO said he's been whinnying and kicking the door most of the day when people are in and out. Must be getting back to his normal self. Pleased! :D

This is not my first experience of donkeys!! At a rs we used to use for uni donkeys arrived next door, you have never seen such placid horses turn into quivering wrecks. But Mr Cob was being so good the other day all he did was have a little dancey spook and have a good look, he was very tense but coped with it until friends horse freaked and he followed suit.

My face is huge, back at work on mon... Hope they don't think oh been battering me lol! Very difficult to look down, feels like there's pressure in my face and feels like its going to pop.
 
Aw hope you both feel better soon.
Cold compresses/ hosing and pain relief for you both by the sound of it.
I hope youre both feeling better by Monday.
If not Dr's for you and vet for your boy
 
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