Sharing Advice Needed

[littlen]

I am currently debating whether to get a sharer or not and would love some advice or experiences to help me decide.
I wanted someone to do about 2 days a week, just to get him fitter and also to give me a break, and i could do with the financial help also.

A lady contacted me about him, and she does sound nice and may be coming to see him next week, but now i am having a wobble about it.
Im scared she will not be any good for him, will not ride him correctly (he is sensitive and i dont want him hauled about), that i wont get to have time with him if i want it, that something will happen to him...and worst of all that he will like her more than me

Now someone tell me im being stupid!!

What sort of things should i be looking at if and when she comes to see him? What should i be asking her about?
If she is unsuitable would you think it rude of me to just tell her that i dont feel she is right for him?

Has anyone had any experience of sharing, did it work?
I would also like to hear from any sharers if there are any about!

 

[lexiedhb]

To be fair give the woman a chance! She might just turn out to be a very nice rider, who will treat your nag like her own. I am a sharer, and have had people share my own horse in the past, just remember that not everyone will do EVERYTHING exactly the same as you, but that doesnt make it wrong.

If she isnt a nice rider then of course you are well within your rights to say that you dont think her and ponio are suited!

 

[Piccy]

I can relate to how you are feeling at the moment, as i felt the same when i was advertising, my only advice i can give you is go with your gut feeling, I did and have ended up with the most fantastic sharer who i really can think of as a sharer but more of friend.

Good luck and give the woman a chance you will know if its right in your heart.

 

[kick_On]

Give this person a chance........... But do follow your gut feeling. I had brilliant sharers in past but just make sure to do get on chatting wise and have same opinions and then you'll relax.

I you must give them a chance, what i do is, if sharer like my horses and have to be able handle them first, before they get the chance to ride and this process can take a couple of weeks.

But any will sharer should understand this..........

But if you expecting a professional schooling service, sorry but sharing ain't for you. You have to pay for that service

 

[littlen]

Im not asking for anything special, just someone to hack him and spend some time with him since my circumstances have changed and i no longer can spend hours every night with him! It will be even harder in the winter when there is even less daylight and thats why i thought a sharer might be a good idea, even if it was just to take the pressure off once or twice a week!
Its not so much the lady, as she sounds lovely but more the concept of trusting someone else with my horse as im scared something will happen, although i will be discussing everything with sharer. I just want someone like me who wants to enjoy him for those 2 days or so!
I know it could be great for me and him but i still worry!

Do you think a sharer would mind me hanging about for the first week or so, or as a sharer would you mind the owner popping down to see him on your day?

 

[kick_On]

not being funny it's YOUR pride and JOY and you much feel confident. Me personnel it takes a while and any sharer MUST understand

BUT then you must trust after a while - try and see for sharer point of view, but so long as they treat your horse as you treat or better your on to a winner..........

But nip anything you don't like at start..... Be upfront about your horse routine etc do and don't and even write them down....

 

[lexiedhb]

Personally I dont mind the owners of my share horse being about when I'm there, bu then she's great and has never questioned anything I have done with her horse.......... if however they had sighted lack of time as a reason for wanting a sharer then I would be a bit wary if the owner was constantly there looking over my shoulder, on my days..... it would just make me feel uncomfy. Obviously for the first few weeks if you wanted to be there then that shouldnt cause an issue!!

Also be prepared for the fact that accidents DO happen, if you think you will end up hating a sharer if your horse injures itself whilst in her care (through no fault of the sharer) then maybe getting a sharer isnt for you!

 

[Tickles]

'My' owner has been really good about not watching my every move (although I was prepared for someone wanting to to start with) but always being around/on phone for advice.

I think it helps that I'm having occasional lessons with her instructor. In fact I had a trial one before I started sharing - owner didn't watch which made me calmer & gave me a chance to ask a third party if they thought we were suited.

Also I always send her a little message (good & bad things) after I've seen horsey to let her know how it went/what we did.

I don't think most sharers would be offended if you suggested either of these things, you could always say lessons were 'for horse' and you need updates to balance his workload or something.

Oh, and my owner shared before she owned so knows how it feels for me too

 

[Rhiann0n]

I used to share my horse, though it was more like a loan as the owner was out of the country most of the time. She ended up giving him to me.

It was quite stressful as we had a lot of trouble with livery yards and I felt responsible for a horse that wasn't mine but was reliant on me.

As others have said - go with your gut feeling, but make sure you get everything in writing!!!

The sharer may feel a bit uncomfortable with you watching, but if she appreciates how you feel about the horse, she'll understand; and he's yours after all, you have to be comfortable with how he's treated.

One really good thing mine's owner did was to let me try him alone, after the initial visit - it really helped me decide to have him - whether or not she had someone secretly scrutinising me!!

 

[littlen]

I would want to hang about at first just to check everything was being done properly and I was worried that any sharer would be put off by this, obviously after a week or so i wouldnt unless there was a problem. Its just the simple things, like checking for injury or lameness, and he is quite quirky so needs someone who can deal with this confidently.
Im sure the lady will be able to do this, although i would want to see her ride, tack up, and also deal with his handling before she is let loose so to speak!

He is stabled at the back of my house so I would proberbly still pop down and give him a carrot after sharer has gone though since i am a little obsessed lol!

 

[kick_On]

sounds very normal i wish you good luck

 

[glamourpuss]

I have 2 sharers. One for my horse - I just sort of acquired her

Her horse was on box rest for ages and she was moaning about not being able to ride so I offered her my boy to hack out on. After her horse was PTS we just sort of carried on. She makes no financial contribution but she mucks out, poo picks etc on her days and is always helpful in being there for farrier/vet etc if I'm at work. We have no formal contract, I never go and check on her everything is fine. She doesn't even have set days, she just texts me at the beginning of the week to ask which day is best.

The other sharers I have is for my sons pony. They were a bit of a nightmare initially but I drew up a contract and some strict groundrules and since then it has worked brilliantly. I stuck with them because they adore the pony and the daughter rides it lovely.
These I have a contract saying exactly what they can and can't do with the pony, they have set days which can only be changed with my agreement, they make a weekly contribution and they have to pay for their own insurance.

Good luck!