should I be there when my pony is pts?

Depends how he is being pts, if shot then no you don't want to be there but if injection it depends.

I wasn't there for my first boy and I do not regret it, he was so out of it I doubt he would have known and the injection was just put through his drip.

I was there for my other boy though, he was a major stress head who was more relaxed when I was around so I was there for him.

I won't lie it isn't nice and certainly not easy but when it all goes to plan it is peaceful. There may be a bit of twitching when he goes down but nothing huge. There is a bit of blood where the cathater goes in, this really took me by surprise and this is the point I could no longer hold him but I was next to him still.

Do not be there for the removal say your goodbyes and leave the vet/ disposal guy to do it.

I like to cut a bit of tail off and take a shoe off, our disposal guy offered to take the shoe off for us, this is definitely optional but I love having the reminders of him with me.

Good luck OP with whatever descion you make, I'm so sorry you're going through this if you ever need someone to talk to I'm only a PM away.
 
I think you should be with them to the end, I was, and I know it was the right thing.

You need to think about your horse, and who they would rather be with at the end....
 
No-one really knows how they will be on the day, until the day comes. I stayed with my old girl until the crem came to collect her body. I would never have left her, it was my duty to stay with her and see that everything went smoothly and how I had hoped it would (it did). Anyway, there was no-one else around and I had no-one to support me anyway, before during or after. It was PTS by my choice, to prevent her struggling with another winter so I'd had plenty of time to plan and come to terms with it. Obviously I was very upset on the day but I treated it like a normal vets visit and kept it all together so that she didn't pick up on anything. Six months later I had to do it all again with my elderly cat and I stayed with her too. There was nothing to fear and again it was entirely my choice. I asked the vet to PTS, not him suggesting it to me.

I would suggest you think about it, decide but then have a back-up plan. I've known people say they would stay to the end, but then changed their minds on the the day. It isn't anything to be ashamed of though.

Sorry to hear about your poor little pony. My girl's eyesight was failing too, and I suspect she was losing her hearing as well.
 
Agree with others that say you should be there with them at the end. I know on a practical level that they don't know, but I feel its a responsibility of owning an animal.

My mum made me come home the day they put my little dog down, so I could hold her, and as hard as it was, she was right, it was up to me.

I had a mare I who I subsequently sold, when she was sick and they were thinking of putting her down (turned out she pulled through, bless her), there was a huge part of me that felt terrible for not being able to fly to Melbourne to be with her.
 
Last edited:
Personally I feel I would have to ve there as I wouldn't feel comfortable with him being alone! But obviously that's just me and everyone copes differently. A friend said that when she has hers put down she stands with her back to them so she's there but doesn't see it then as they fall she walks away and doesn't look back and her husband takes if from there so think this is how I feel will be right for me
 
hollyflower said:
. I was wondering how other people handled this and what they think. I was with my dog and was hysterical, he really struggled and kept pulling the line out of his forearm and I have wondered wether I was upsetting him, I dont want to let him down either.
Click to expand...

If you can't cope without getting hysterical then I would stay away. When my last horse was PTS at a hospital i was allowed to spend time with him before and was determined I wouldn't cry in front of him before he was led into the put down box. They wouldn't let me stay when he was pts as he had wobblers and was very unstable on his feet and it was quite dangerous as they didn't know how or where he would fall. I remember the weak legs, and heart hammering feeling even now, and still get that feeling when I think about it. But I do feel I could have coped without getting upset.
 
I personally wouldn't. End of the day, he won't know (or really care...) but you will be living with that as your last memory of him. I would go out, have a day with him giving treats and cuddles, give him a good groom and take a lock of hair and a photo, then go home.

Very sorry that you have to go through this, your pony is very lucky to have you x
 
I'm so sorry. :(

I have a 25 year old pony who I absolutely adore with every fibre of my being.

I've always said that when the time comes it should be me that this there for her. However, their was a thread about this very subject a few months ago and reading about other people's experiences made me realise that for her passing to be peaceful for her, I may not be the right person on the day. I know I will be utterly devastated and so I've told my husband that if I can't cope without falling to bits then he will have to do it for her sake. He is ok with this and he sees and handles her as much as I do so she will be perfectly comfortable in his company.

Do whatever you think is right and stuff what anyone else thinks. xx
 
I am so sorry for your news.

I have stayed with every animal that I have had to have PTS but I couldnt stay with the late, great Murph. We were so close and I feel like I let him down at the end by not being able to be with him but he was always very upset when I was upset. I knew that I would be a mess when he was put down so my husband stayed with him. TBH he was so ill I doubt he had any idea if I was there or not. Whilst I regret not being there for him in his final moments, I know it was the most sensible decision to ensure the process went smoothly, and he was with someone he knew and trusted. I also couldnt bear the thought that that would be my last memory of him. It was, and is, distressing enough being able to recall the mess he was in before he lost the fight.

Its a choice only you can make but do not beat yourself up for whatever path you choose - whatever youwill decide will be right. Good luck and biggest hugs xxx
 
hollyflower said:
Do you think he will be distressed by me not being there? I am worried I am letting him down by not being and hd has never let me down once :(
Click to expand...
So sorry for you but as we all know this is the always the end result when we have animals in our lives. For me personally, I have always stayed but it is a very personal choice. I just know that if I hadn't, I would have regretted it for the rest of my days, but as I said, it's a personal choice. The hardest one for me was my very best pal who I had the pleasure of sharing my life with for 23 yrs. he had given everything of himself to me and I would never have not been there for him at the end. I used to imagine what it would be like and kept telling myself I would never be able to cope, but I just did. He was my first loss and by far the hardest one to bear but I was so grateful I found the courage to stay with him, I'm sure that's why he stayed so calm and slipped away very peacefully.
whatever you decide to do, your conscience should be clear that you have given him a wonderful home for the last 19 years.😊
 
Maybe think about how you would feel after, would you feel upset that you weren't with him? Might help you to decide, whatever happens I hope its peaceful xx
 
equi said:
I personally wouldn't. End of the day, he won't know (or really care...) but you will be living with that as your last memory of him. I would go out, have a day with him giving treats and cuddles, give him a good groom and take a lock of hair and a photo, then go home.

Very sorry that you have to go through this, your pony is very lucky to have you x
Click to expand...

Disagree^



My mare's knew I was there to comfort - I saw it in theirs eyes and reactions. I would always be there at the end to know she was peacefully sleeping in my arms.

Yes its my last memory but its a memory that the one she loved was there to comfort her, knowing I was with them gives me piece and I don't dwell on it being the last memory. Would not have it any other way.......... OP its a comfort and crying on them again was closure that their pain was over.

You do what is right for you OP
 
I'm so sorry you're facing this decision. It really is a very personal one and there is no right or wrong choice.

The one thing I would say, having been there for a friend's mare (planned) and my old boy (unplanned - colic) is that the actual act is not as bad as you might think it is (they both had the injection). I really didn't know what to expect with my friend's mare as I had never seen it before and I was surprised how peaceful it was. I was glad I knew what to expect with my old boy - the fear of the unknown is sometimes worse.

If you think the emotion will be too much though, there's no shame in staying away. He's more likely to be more upset sensing your distress than if you're not there.

Whatever you decide I hope it goes as well as something like that can.
 
A good friend came over (was in the middle of the night too as was colic) I stayed while she was sedated then my friend stayed with the vet while she was put to sleep and afterwards my friend took me back to see her body. Sometimes its good to see them peaceful like that and knowing that they have gone.
 
OP, I just thought of something. If you look on Youtube you will find some videos of horses and ponies being PTS by injection. They aren't in the slightest bit gory, or frightening. Why don't you take a look and get an idea of the actual procedure. A not insignificant amout of owners stress on the day is fear of the unknown I think.
 
I have just gone through this!!!! My vet was amazing!!! I decided to have lethal injection which is done in stages so first injection sedates them a little so they are relaxed at this point you can give them polo's, carrots etc. then second injection heavily sedates them. My boy was snoring very loudly at this point :-) it was then on my vet's advice that I said my goodbye's and left whilst she administered the final lethal dose and got him to the floor with the help of the knackerman (who was a really nice bloke) it was incredibly sad but it was the most peaceful/perfect ending I could of hoped for.
 
I personally strongly feel that you should be there at the end.
I was there at the end with Daisy and though I was terrified and yes I did cry, I wasn't hysterical and the vet was professional, efficient and treated her with the utmost care and respect. She was PTS via injection and she got down just like they do to roll but stayed on her side. It was very peaceful and I'm glad I was there at the end, made it easier to accept (though I'm welling up typing this).
I've had my first pony 9 years and hope I'l have many more with her but even though it will be horrific, I will do my best to be there at the end.
 
Personal choice like everyone has said really.
I wouldn't have been anywhere else for mine as I'm glad I was with him till the end, but equally his was so traumatic and unplanned, on a selfish level I wish I hadn't witnessed that. I still wake up from nightmares replaying it sometimes. The actual putting to sleep part, was the 'easy' part for me [if there is an 'easy' part to any of it, I hope you understand what I mean]. The moments prior to it, are the ones that still haunt me.
 
I have seen many, many pets PTS and I totally think its up to the owner. If you feel you will be hysterical, its best that you aren't in my humble opinion.

I have been there for my dogs. I could not be there for my horse, I was a complete mess as he was relatively young (my dogs were all a ripe old age)-he was a very well handled animal who liked his vet and wasn't distressed at all by the extra people about. Once he was sedated, I left-my husband wanted to stay so he did. With the old pony I have, I think I will stay as I won't be as heartbroken and he doesn't like strangers/vet so much and so I think it will keep him happy, having me there-I expect I won't choose injection for him either.

Its a personal decision and you may well not know for sure until just beforehand.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top