So, Badminton: To sum up

To avoid unnecessary stress on both horse and rider perhaps they should be limited to one fence per hour? Or even per day? To avoid over exertion and tiredness.
All horses should take part wearing slippers to avoid stress on thier feet and all riders should wear hi-vis all in ones, apart from the ones pre selected at the start (by me) to compete semi naked.
At the lake and water jumps all riders should strip down to appropriate swim wear and using a life saving manouvre and their clothes in a plastic bag aid their mounts across. On the other side the attractive ones will be allowed to continue in just jodphurs and manly wet torsos whilst the not so fit ones will be made to wriggle back into their bright yellow all in ones.
Horses should be asked before each jump if they wish to attempt the obstacle. Any not wishing to should be lead gently round the jump and given carrots to combat any stress.
 
Cadfael&Coffee said:
Ok I'm putting my foot down here- HALF naked.

Even the cute ones have to wear trousers- there is NOTHING attractive about a meat and two veg walloping itself off a saddle or pair of withers :shocked:
Click to expand...


Oh dear, on any other day that would be the funniest thing I'd read all day, but due to the one about being as good as Mark Todd but not having to prove it on the Inconsiderate thread in Latest News, you only get the blue rosette today. But goodness me that is funny. I nearly choked on my sausage sandwich!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
uh.. tbh i think if the ground is anything what it was like this year then it should not be run next year.. the shetties would hurt their shoeless feet.. :( .. we could make it one big sand pit..?
 
I think the fences should be 30cms and the horses and ponies should not break out of walk and be lead over the fences.
Then they can stop for a quick breather, have a 5* vetting then on to the next jump. A maxiumum of 3 jumps per day. :D
And if they refuse pony wony should be given a big hug and told that "its ok, eat some more grass and try again" :D
 
RebelRebel said:
Lovely image EKW, but I am troubled by the ears slightly back.
Could the horse have had a traumatic weaning?
Click to expand...

Oh dear lord this thread is soo funny! :D:D
Thanks for that Rebel ;)

Did you know.....

We are having a more constructive discussion than the actual Badminton threads... certainly more common sense knocking about around here... :eek:
 
I am assuming of course that it will be no added sugar muesli?

Maybe we could also employ Ryvita for some of the fences, as long as we file off the sharp edges of course! Let's face it, there's no chance anyone would want to eat it...;)
 
skewbald_again said:
Applications now being taken for the Unicorn and Muesli Badminton Clique.
As you do. :)
Click to expand...

Ooooo me me me me!! My Shetland has a very suitable show name I think you'll agree: Littlegems Solar Sunshine. However, I'm slightly worried that he is so sweet and sugary that the other shetlands will get laminitus when they see him or even when they hear his name....
 
I'll be at the start clipping the Shetlands. This would be full head and neck with rest of body left fluffy. Apparently this is what you do with little ponies.
It's all explained in more detail in the book "Armchair Eventing" by Mark Todd.
 
Lady La La said:
Sign me up! I was thinking of making a SPCIS Clique - The Shetland Pony collonic Irigation Society :rolleyes: :p
Click to expand...

I will never, ever turn my back on a Shetland again :eek:



For the poster making the Funhouse reference back there - I reckon my lad would enjoy funhouse - he seems to like getting muddy in the field so I'm sure he'd like the gunk :rolleyes: Could we set it up as new sport / entertainment program?? :D
 
JFTD said:
I will never, ever turn my back on a Shetland again :eek:



For the poster making the Funhouse reference back there - I reckon my lad would enjoy funhouse - he seems to like getting muddy in the field so I'm sure he'd like the gunk :rolleyes: Could we set it up as new sport / entertainment program?? :D
Click to expand...

Twas I, so yes lets do it. My shetland can be the new Pat Sharp?

...No? :p

skewbald_again said:
All welcome, the more the merrier.
PS Lady La La how do you make your cliques pretty colours?
Click to expand...

Essentially... I'm a genius - however, if you highlight your chosen words and click on the nice colour icon which will be located near your font type/size etc ^^^ up there... it should do the trick.

Like this
 
Lady La La said:
Twas I, so yes lets do it. My shetland can be the new Pat Sharp?
Click to expand...

Does your Shetland have a suitable mullet? I can't wait to re-record the theme music :p And re-design the go-karts to accomadate hairy pony backsides :D

(BTW, you actually made my afternoon, I was shaking with laughter at my desk, it's a miracle my colleagues didn't call the men in white coats!)
 
Urgent update:
We now need to provide trophies and some suitably dizzying prize money for a number of people who are as good as *or better than* Mark Todd any day, but do not choose to demonstrate this by lowering themselves so far as to actually *compete*. I do not know how we shall recognise them, but apparently, they are legion, and obviously, they should be rewarded accordingly.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top