So Do I Have Mug Written in Big Letters on My Forehead?

I have seen this before.

The instuctor that called my mare 'only fit for dogmeat' had regular customers (that could cope with their horses fine with a bit of friendly encouragement) having regular lessons that nearly always ended with the customer in tears about how dreadful they were, the horse was too good for them and several more lessons booked.

Somehow she made them dependant on her and at the same time wore away at their confidence, therefore they felt that they needed her more.

I never had another lesson with her BTW.
 
Well you are not the first and you won't be the last, just someone who expects honesty from people paid to help. Just glad for you that you have found somewhere, both you and your horse will come on leaps and bounds:)
 
It's a sod, but it's life...

...and even if you said now..

'My horse is going great, what exactly were you 'training' him on...?'...

...they would simply say -

'Well, your horse is going well because of what we did, right?'....
 
I think it's unlikely that an entire establishment would collude against you. As you say you're confidence was rock bottom and in their defence they did suggest you sell the horse.
Has there been any communication between the yards? I expect there has, knowing what the 'jungle drums' are like. But most importantly; how does the horse feel to you? How does he feel when you ride him? No one can do this for you.
Forgive me if I'm wrong but I think I remember your previous posts and you're still not making your own decisions.
 
I always think it's a sign of a poor instructor if the tell you your horse is too good for you, its a fine line btw instruction and been bullied.
 
It's easy to be fooled when you're wrapped up in the situation. Accept your human, put it behind you as a lesson learnt & move on. Enjoy your horse, stay away from the other yard. Best thing you can do is just have fun together & by the sound of it you have a lovely young horse to bring on.
 
Put it down to experience like some of the other posters have said. You trust someone and they have taken advantage of you but you have seen whats going on which is sometimes very hard to take a step back.

Regarding BHS its not relevant as some BHS places are terrible and having seen a very high up instructor thrash a horse with a whip I now take everyone on their own merit not what qualifications they hold.

OP just take onboard what the people at your own yard say and hopefully you will gain the trust of your horse again.
 
pip6 said:
It's easy to be fooled when you're wrapped up in the situation. Accept your human, put it behind you as a lesson learnt & move on. Enjoy your horse, stay away from the other yard. Best thing you can do is just have fun together & by the sound of it you have a lovely young horse to bring on.
Click to expand...

Yes this. There isn't much you can do except to learn from it and move on and enjoy your horse.
 
I agree put in it the past you can’t change it and you have moved so far it is no longer constructive or helpful to look back.

Just a thought, I enjoying proving someone was wrong if they have told me I am not good enough to do something (also a great confidence boost). I don't know what you want to do with your horse but wouldn’t it be great to send a picture of you on your first hack, schooling, dressage competition, jumping, fun ride, etc? Or perhaps a picture of your instructor at the dressage competition in September? It sounds like you have the support to do this now.

Take it slowly and remember that there will be bad days as well as good ones, a bad day doesn’t mean that you are not good enough just that it wasn’t a good one for whatever reason.

Really good luck and enjoy what you have!
 
Aw hun.

Everyone else has said wise words, so I'll just send you a hug.

You're in the right place now by the sounds of it. You have the horse you love.

Look forward and enjoy the sight of those two pricked ears :D
 
£700 p/m and you had to muck out every day? :eek: blimey, they were on to a good thing! :D

Well as you say, it's a lesson learned. Get an honest ridden assesment at the new yard and if your horse is too much for you, hard as it might be, the best option would be to sell on and to take your time to find something that will help restore your confidence (will give you chance to save some pennies too :))
 
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