sold my horse but new owner not happy..

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lg4770

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i sold my lovely 16.1 gelding to a new home, i have hacked him and done some local shows with him over the last 18 months and just before he was sold, he went to a show and won the 70cm jumping class and came 2nd in the 80cm (he was a fabulous jumper) but i had to sell him due to lack of time and funds, the new owner has had him a few weeks and says he has not settled down, and is spooky and although not bucking or rearing (which he never done with me, ever!) she says she wants me to take him back and give her a refund. I cannot take him back, i dont have the money anymore due to being made redundant a few months back. I sold him in good faith and he was always a lovely kind horse when i had him, i dont know what to do ? ......
 
You don't HAVE to do anything. You are a private seller, you sold your horse, she bought it, end of story. Are you near her? Could you go and give her a hand?
 
I would advise her that he was sold as seen - you provided all the information you could to help her and like you said he was good with you etc
It may be that he is still settling - changing owner and yards etc is a big stress for them....offer her your help and support if she wants it but do not let her make you feel guilty!
If you sold him in good faith then its not your responsibility anymore....!
Sorry you had to sell :(
 
she lives nearly 2 hours away, so i cant just go over to her, he was a really lovely boy so i cant understand why he hasnt settled..
 
I feel for these poor horses that are not allowed time to settle. Someone said once that for a horse being sold on, it would be felt by us jus like getting divorced, looseing your mum, moveing house, getting remarried and all in the same week!

Tell her to learn some patience and be fair to the poor horse!!

Other than that, he could give up horses all together and go buy a motorbike!
 
elsbells said:
I feel for these poor horses that are not allowed time to settle. Someone said once that for a horse being sold on, it would be felt by us jus like getting divorced, looseing your mum, moveing house, getting remarried and all in the same week!

Tell her to learn some patience and be fair to the poor horse!!

Other than that, he could give up horses all together and go buy a motorbike!
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Amen to that! Especially the motorbike part!

OP - I had a similar situation earlier this year. Sold a calm, solid, gentle chap to what I though were the ideal owners. After 3 weeks of texts and calls saying how fabulous he was they suddenly wanted to return him saying he was rearing!

I would have taken him back in a flash if I'd had the money :( but I couldn't. It's very distressing but as Weezy above points out you do not have to do anything (unless you want to) and 'You don't HAVE to do anything. You are a private seller, you sold your horse, she bought it, end of story.'

I offered to go and see/ride horse I sold for the new owners - who were about 2hrs away from me) but they refused any help :(
 
I really really feel for you. The same thing happened to me once a few years ago. I sold a very good horse for personal reasons and for whatever reason he didn't settle with the new owner.

To cut a long story short, we ended up in Court, I won the case, she had the horse pts!!! So so so sad :( H&H did an article on my story.

There is so much advice and help out there for when buying but not for when selling....

I'm sorry but I don't know what the answer is....
 
elsbells said:
Tell her to learn some patience and be fair to the poor horse!!

Other than that, he could give up horses all together and go buy a motorbike!
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As above, honestly some people, you'd think they would have the brains to work out that the horse will need time to adjust, fair play if the horse is still playing up months down the line but after 2 weeks? :rolleyes:
 
I'd make it clear that you are unable to buy him back due to your financial circumstances. Then, if you are unable to go and help them in person, I would try advising them over the phone. Is the horse on the same stabling/turnout routine as you had him on, has his feed changed, has he got new tack, is he ridden as much as when you had him? These are all factors that may cause his behaviour to change. Was he unsettled when you first bought him? Perhaps you could suggest the new owner gets an instructor to give her a few lessons.
 
My boy is still a tad spooky and I have had him just over a month, although like your boy, nothing to worry about, no rearing or bucking (although a little napping and planting went on, but now sorted), so no issues really, he is just very alert and jumpy to new things, I have just needed to be confident to reassure him.
Don't do anything, although I would be like you, understandably upset that he has not settled. If he was round the corner you could go and see him, but he is not. My horse has done spooky things that I did not see in him when I went to view him, but appreciate he is in a new home with new owners, they have not given him the time to settle yet, as you say it has only been a few weeks! Crikey, some people, it's a horse, not a machine, what do they expect - some horses do spook at new things :rolleyes:
 
RachelDye said:
I really really feel for you. The same thing happened to me once a few years ago. I sold a very good horse for personal reasons and for whatever reason he didn't settle with the new owner.

To cut a long story short, we ended up in Court, I won the case, she had the horse pts!!! So so so sad :( H&H did an article on my story.

There is so much advice and help out there for when buying but not for when selling....

I'm sorry but I don't know what the answer is....
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I remember that. Didn't you offer to buy it back and she had it PTS despite this? I remember thinking that she must have done that because she had something to hide.
 
Definitely needs more time to settle. What are these people thinking fgs ?? If he's a problem being ridden, don't ride him yet, just let him be, and he'll come round. It's not your problem any more, tho saying that, it must be a very emotional and difficult time for you. ((((((((((((hugs))))))) sm x
 
I would do nothing. You sold her the horse, he needs time to settle. It took mine almost 4 months to settle!

If she is having issues she NEEDS lessons - this will help her bond with the horse and understand him (hopefully).

Folk really do overestimate their capabilities when I comes to buying horses, I wish folk would write down what they can do, then dumb it down a tad then look for a horse - unless they are skilled and can handle it.

I can jump 3ft + and handle firey horses, but doesnt mean I would be happy to own one, therefore I wouldnt go looking for one - but if one did act like that for a bit then I could handle it. If that makes sense.
 
she should indeed buy a motorbike! totally disgusting and i feel so so sorry for you and the poor horse!
i bought a horse last year for me and my daughter. he went from being an angel to aliitle bully who put my daughter right off riding, even being near him!
This past year i have bought books, read up all i can and taken advice whereever i could, this plus weekly riding lessons from a fab instructor who also give3s me tips on ground management, improving his manners has doen wonders!!!!
my daughter rode him bareback last week - first time shed been to yard in months - and was amazed at teh difference - now she wants ot start lessons on him next week.
Poor horse, needs time, patience, love, care and effort - im so so sorry xxx
 
It amazes me ho wmany people just expect the horse to be the same with them immmediately,. Some horses will never be entirely the same, they have a whole new environment, owner, routine etc.

My most recent acquisition took almost a year to settle. Extreme I know, but he really is a one person horse and had been passed from pillar to post. It took a long time but he's 'mine' now and I won;t ever part with him just becuase it would be so traumatic for him.
 
Took my horse 3-4 months to settle. I did ask previous owners if anything I was or wasn't doing was right, feed etc. In the end it was just time he needed and now he is good as gold. It can be a bit unnerving when a new horse plays up though especially If she is not overly confident anyway - which it sounds like to me.

She needs to be hacking in company and having plenty of lessons. Hope it works out the horses sake at least.
 
Have a bit of heart the new owners are obviously feeling out of their depth and having a panic, the "they should get a motorbike" comments are a bit harsh.

OP - I would be very clear that you can't afford to take the horse back and that you aren't obliged to as he was sold as seen. But I would try to help them to settle him and get to know him, this will only be good for the horse, you don't want them to give up and ship him off to market.

I'd go through their management routine with them and see if there is anything obvious. Discuss handling and riding, maybe offer to visit and ride him or watch them ride. If you can't do this give them the name of your instructor who is familiar with him and suggest they get lesson with her. Or failing that just any good instructor.

Reassure them that horses do take a while to settle and can be difficult for a few weeks before they settle and that this is normal. They are probably just worried that they have bought a loon and if you are helpful and honest now it will help avoid them continuing to think that and considering further action.
 
OP - tell them to give the horse some time to settle and let them get on with it. Your responsibility ended when they collected and drove off the horse, it was a private sale.

Out of interest, we had (still have) a little rescue mare, superb little jumping pony. We got her last year, didnt settle at all, very fizzy and silly. contacted old loaner, and they said it didnt sound like her at all. Rather than panic, we turned her away with a friend for well over 8 months.

Brought her back out this spring and back to yard she arrived at with us, and she is different pony. She had a lot of change in a short time and despite being 23 she couldnt cope with it. She is exactly how she was described now, but it just took time!!!
 
It took me a year to get my beast "rideable" again after being schooled with his head pinned to his chest and no one to one time - he was just a machine...
Moved him from that yard to where i am now and it took 6-8 months for him to settle to where he was at the previous yard....another 12 months ontop of that and he is utterly and completely mummies boy
Patience is a virtue :)
 
As others have said - the poor chap need time and considerate , careful handling. Moving homes for a horse is a major trauma and changing owners too. It took me two months to settle my mare enough to ride her. We spent 8 weeks doing groundwork and establishing trust and it really paid off. Really simple things like asking her to stand, walk on, move sideways and backwards just to get her used to me and what I was asking. He needs to gain his confidence in them and get used to his new surroundings.

I agree coaching them over the phone is a good idea as is suggesting they have lessons but again that is dependant on a good sympathetic instructor.

Some people don't seem to realise that a horse isn't a machine :(
 
Sounds more like a case of a too inexperienced and novicey new owner than a problem with the horse? Do people never question that they themselves may be at fault or consider that a horse is not a machine and they need to build a partnership?

It happened with my current horse. He's a 17.1 warmblood and forward going. The last but one owner wanted to return him after a week because he was strong to lead in from the field and walked off when mounting. Yes, its true he does both of these mildly but they are such minor faults you wouldn't worry about them unless you were a total novice. He only walks off when being mounted because he has had saddle sores in the past and he remembers it and now he hardly does it at all! Plus he now walks at exactly the right time for me to swing my leg over the saddle and drop into the plate! The seller refused to take him back as there was nothing wrong with him and he ended up being traded into a dealer where I got him from.

But why buy a 17.1 warmblood thats forward going in the first place if you can't handle minor things like strength in hand and walking off when mounted?
 
I agree with Kat, have a bit of heart.... it would be nice if you could help them out by looking at their basic management etc, (afterall it COULD be that they doing something silly like pumping it full of uneccessary feed), but it's not your obligation.

Sometimes people make mistakes, and I do think the 'should have bought a motorbike' comments are harsh. Perhaps although the horse was great with you, they are just not experienced or good enough riders to bring the best out in him now they are flying solo, or perhaps they just aren't clicking and as a partnership they just know they arent going to work together. Yes, a new horse needs time to settle, but I think as a purchaser you have the responsibility of making sure you have thoroughly tried the horse you are going to buy and can be as sure as you can be that you will click and make a good partnership with him or her - and perhaps that is what has happened in this case? Im not saying that is any way your fault OP, infact I blame the people who bought your horse... whatever happens, they will learn in the future to go back and try out any potential horse as many times as they can, spend as much time as they can with him or her and get a lesson or 2 if possible.

i think a lot of the time the problem is that the people who get into these situations dont put enough time and effort into horse hunting. they see a horse, try it once and buy it.....
 
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You are under no obligation to either buy the horse back, find a new owner or anything else. The new owner must give the horse more time to settle, or sell him on. herself.
 
I've just bought back a home-bred mare I sold as a rising 4 year old 2 years ago. First owner had no real problems (Filly threw a few paddies in the first few weeks, but nothing that was a major problem and buyer wasn't fussed - after all, she'd never been off my farm before so it was to be expected.)

New owner sold her after 12 months to a less experienced home - mare threw a paddy, new owner had a fit and demanded seller took her back. Seller didn't! I offered to help but new owner didn't want to know and the mare spent nearly a year in the field - looked after, but hardly ridden. Then she was back on the market, failed a vetting(she was very unfit and tied up!) - and seller told potential buyers such nonsense about her that she was never going to sell her!

So I bought her back - to save her from ending up somewhere totally unsuitable. She was a right Madam at first - strops here, strops there - we ignored the strops and she's settled right down and is back to being the sane little mare she was when she left here! ButI WILL have to be careful when I sell her, to ensure new owner KNOWS that she'll probably throw a paddy in a new yard. I call it 'new girl in school' syndrome! They either hide in a corner, scared of everything - OR - they start throwing their weight around and being the centre of attention! Of course, if they take the latter option, then GIVING them attention means the behaviour will continue! Quietly ignoring it and getting on with things will ensure they settle in quickly.
 
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NeverSayNever said:
I agree with Kat, have a bit of heart.... it would be nice if you could help them out by looking at their basic management etc, (afterall it COULD be that they doing something silly like pumping it full of uneccessary feed), but it's not your obligation.

Sometimes people make mistakes, and I do think the 'should have bought a motorbike' comments are harsh. Perhaps although the horse was great with you, they are just not experienced or good enough riders to bring the best out in him now they are flying solo, or perhaps they just aren't clicking and as a partnership they just know they arent going to work together. Yes, a new horse needs time to settle, but I think as a purchaser you have the responsibility of making sure you have thoroughly tried the horse you are going to buy and can be as sure as you can be that you will click and make a good partnership with him or her - and perhaps that is what has happened in this case? Im not saying that is any way your fault OP, infact I blame the people who bought your horse... whatever happens, they will learn in the future to go back and try out any potential horse as many times as they can, spend as much time as they can with him or her and get a lesson or 2 if possible.

i think a lot of the time the problem is that the people who get into these situations dont put enough time and effort into horse hunting. they see a horse, try it once and buy it.....
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Yes I agree whole heartedly, you have to give a horse time to settle. Get back, teeth and saddle checked and keep it on a yard where you've got help to start off with, otherwise what chance does the horse stand!
 
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