sold my horse but new owner not happy..

It seems that nowadays new owners expect to pay their money and get on and go without any work or understanding of what is happening. When I was younger it was really rare for someone to expect a seller to take the horse back weeks later. Nowadays it seems to happen a lot. My neighbour bought a 4yr old for herself and her daughter to share as their first pony - despite everyone telling them otherwise because "yours turned out really well..." Bear in mind that I'm a BHSAI, and had worked really hard on our youngster! The poor thing ended up being sold to a dealer for a third of the price six months later..

Its perfectly understandable for a buyer to ring for advice though. Again, I would suggest to them that they get a good instructor, have plenty of lessons, and build up from there.
 
It does take Horses a long time to settle. I moved my own Horse to a different yard towards the end of last year, he'd been at previous yard for about 4 years. When I bought him he was on said yard already so I never had the whole new Horse new yard issue - just the new Horse!
When I moved him I actually thought he'd settle quickly as he knew me and is never unsettled at shows or trailering to hacking but it actually took him about 3 or 4 months to settle. On the surface he was fine, and riding him he was no different. But, it was round the yard he was different. He didn't want to be tied up anywhere and ran off a few times when I was leading him. He also kept jumping the fence to be with the ponies in the field next to him....they are all pals now. If he'd been new to me I might have been a bit worried but as I did know him (very well!) I knew it was just his way of showing insecurity.
You have no obligation as it was a private sale. However, maybe just some extra re-assurance that he'll need a good 3 or 4 months to settle. I think having 'mates' as in Horsey ones in his field would make a difference if he doesn't already and plenty (not just riding) bonding time with new owner.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by elsbells
I feel for these poor horses that are not allowed time to settle. Someone said once that for a horse being sold on, it would be felt by us jus like getting divorced, looseing your mum, moveing house, getting remarried and all in the same week!

Tell her to learn some patience and be fair to the poor horse!!

Other than that, he could give up horses all together and go buy a motorbike!


Exactly! Why why why do people think a horse will be settled and completely normal in a few days, can't understand this!
 
i think you're right suziesparkle..... but its all about how well they can cope with the settling in niggles, the way i see it, if they have made the right choice then they'l get through it. Ive only had Charlie for 3 weeks - yes he has settled pretty quickly but there have been what I would class as the usual things in a new place; he was uncharacteristically bolshy on the ground and anxious to tie up/groom, he wouldnt stand to be mounted and rushed off,he was really spooky and put in 2 180degree spins on our first hack and tried to tank off home, he tipped up a bit and was generally impatient when asked to stand and wait. He never worried me though and all that has settled right down, he still has a spook, but dont they all, lol. The key is though that I know he is the right horse for me - perhaps they've taken on more than they are capable of dealing with, even if it is settling in issues, sometimes it can end up a downward spiral. I do think anyone with a new horse in this position has to be prepared to pay out for support by way of a good RI giving regular input. Either way, its their responsibility to make sure they sort things out both for the horse's future, and their own.
 
When i bought my mare i had the worst time of it for months after i bought her,she was v sharp,v difficult to handle etc and not once did i ring the old owner to blame her or ask her to take her back (i was determined to crack the ned!) I'm pretty sure she was doped when i tried her though but i fell in love with her and just had to get by day by day,she eventually started trusting me and we have a very good relationship now,it's still love/hate a lot but i wouldn't be without her. The lady is being ridiculous expecting a horse to be perfecto in less than 2 weeks!!!! You by right don't have to do anything but if you want to for the horses sake you could try to advise her on how to get him settled in? When i bought my mare the owner told me she loved swede so i used to put that in her feed everyday so she saw me feeding her as a good thing and took it from there.
 
I bought a horse 15 months ago and it took her about 10 months to totally settle down and she is really a lovely horse, i had faith in the person who sold her to me it was rewarding seeing her changing over that time to accept her new home and surroundings it never ceases to amaze me how so called 'horsey' people have unrealistic expections of the horse, when horses settle they should always go back to their default behaviour and temperament
 
I feel so sorry for the poor horse. He's clearly having a tough time adjusting, which is just so sad for him. I just pray these people are inexperienced and worried rather than the nasty type who would try to assume you should buy it back or would push it from pillar to post just because it's not perfect from day one. Poor lad, I really hope this resolves itself soon. Agree with all the others who have said try to reassure them that it takes time and offer to support them. Clearly if you haven't got the money to buy him back there is nothing you can do in that respect, not that you should have to anyway. Massive good luck and I hope it all works out straightforwardly - do keep us all updated.
 
Its just the unfortunate side of selling horses on...

Owners who give the horse a proper trial, and do all the right things but then expect to have the same super horse they bought 'on tap' when they get home, without letting the horse adjust.

Owners who spoil horses because they are so enamoured with their new purchase.

Owners who are so thrilled with their new purchase that they throw caution to the wind and blow its mind, then when it throws a buck or whatever, its 'the horses fault'

I think most owners end up with a different horse then the one they bought after the settling in period!! Its the period where the horse susses out its new surroundings, and learns 'the rules' so to speak. Some are too soft, some don't give the horse a chance.

Its a minefield, and the horses end up the worst for it.
 
sugarmia said:
Quote:
Originally Posted by elsbells
I feel for these poor horses that are not allowed time to settle. Someone said once that for a horse being sold on, it would be felt by us jus like getting divorced, looseing your mum, moveing house, getting remarried and all in the same week!

Tell her to learn some patience and be fair to the poor horse!!

Other than that, he could give up horses all together and go buy a motorbike!


Exactly! Why why why do people think a horse will be settled and completely normal in a few days, can't understand this!
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Well maybe because their last one settled quickly, or only showed insecurity in ways they were able to cope with, or maybe it is their first horse, or maybe they thought the horse was over his settling in and has now started doing something different, or maybe they don't associate this particular issue with being unsettled. Or maybe they are just crapping themselves that they have bought a monster or overhorsed themselves and thought it was worth finding our whether the seller would take him back.

Why do people on here assume everyone is perfect!?

These buyers have a horse they have met a handful of times, the seller says the behaviour is out of character but they don't know his character. They also don't know how honest the seller is. So it is normal for them to be nervous about what they have taken on.
 
Sov my first horse took almost 18 months to truely settle and trust me.
Pip settled almost on the instant.

It's always the poor horses fault. They never seem to look at themselves, their ability, the routine they are using or anything.
*sighs*
 
NeverSayNever said:
i think a lot of the time the problem is that the people who get into these situations dont put enough time and effort into horse hunting. they see a horse, try it once and buy it.....
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What else can you do though, most sellers won't agree trial periods. If you wait without comitting to buying the horse is sold to someone who is prepared to move quickly. The horse may be a long way making numerous pre-purchase visits impractical.

In an ideal world it would be lovely to really get to know a horse before buying but realistically it often isn't possible. Sellers are so quick to dismiss people as timewasters and plaster "NO TIMEWASTERS" all over their adverts that buyers are pressed into moving quickly if they like the horse. For heavens sake I've missed out on two horses because they sold before I could even view them the first time, never mind going back for a dozen different visits.
 
You are not obliged to do anything, however as I am sure you are a nice person with the horses besty interests at heart I would explain firmly that due to your financial situation tyou cannot take it back. Discuss what they are doing both ridden and on the ground and recomend they gicve the horse a longer settling in period. When we sold our first pony the new owner was regularly on the phone (she was very nervous). One day we were having a conversatuiion on the phone because Rags had been strong out hacking and I said to her - do you realise you have now owned him longer that we did!! I guess phoning us just gave her that bit of security. We only get christmas cards now so guess after 8 years he has settled down.
 
I concur with everyone on here - you are under absolutely no obligation and anyway you're broke.

However there is a way round this given you're worrying, probably more about your ex-boy than any taking him back... if the new owner agrees, a third party in the form of an RI could locally have a look whilst chatting to you on the phone about the ned and seeing what the new owners are doing at the same time. They are most likely to see what's going pear shaped (if anything) and cos they are a third party the new owner has brought in she is more able to tell them off for any "mistreatement" etc, not you. Trouble is alot of this stuff builds up, usually as other liveries start tutting, or playing barrack room lawyer and just make everything so much worse.

2 weeks? are you flippin kidding? Took my boy best part of 4 months. Then again he had been messed around quite badly by the last owner - WORD OF WARNING - who used to scream down the phone to the seller about the nasty, unmanageable horse she'd been sold. She did it for months.
 
I agree with Katt. If they are nervous maybe they are just seeking reassurance? There are so many threads on here and other forums about people being ripped off and sold nutters, having accidents etc they may just be having a panic? I would do as the others have said and offer help/ support over the phone, this may well be enough to reassure them.
I have been in this situation myself however it turned out the horse was far from as described. By pure luck I got in touch with the person who owned it before the lady I bought it from who answered tons of my questions honestly and four months on although I haven't got the horse I thought I had brought things are alot better just for the advice and tips given. The person I bought it from got very uptight and agressive when I called her up and asked about its behaviour which made me much more concerned. Hopefully your talking to them and a bit of time will be enough and they will gel.
 
Some horses just take time, and people forget so do the owners. Both parties have to adjust to eachother. It can be quite daunting for people when a new horse who they don't know very well acts up, you don't know what they are exactily capable of. It is quite different if the horse you have had for over a year acts up and you know exactily what he will do.
Just tell the owners to have patience, get lessons, maybe you could go down one weekend and give them a lesson?
 
Interesting post this, my warmblood settled in the first 2 days, i dont think hed realised hed moved ! New one I am having problems with 10 months down line. However, the horse I have is not as was described by the owner, and although I asked lots of questions and tried horse out twice (distance made things difficult) i took what the seller said on trust. Not for one minute suggesting OP wasnt totally truthful, but generally in the horse world Im afraid lot of untruths are told. in fact it seems to be the only walk of life where caveat emptor is the only truth! Probably why us buyers feel that we get the short straw. Again, I am not in any way suggesting OP not totally honest
 
elsbells said:
I feel for these poor horses that are not allowed time to settle. Someone said once that for a horse being sold on, it would be felt by us jus like getting divorced, looseing your mum, moveing house, getting remarried and all in the same week!

Tell her to learn some patience and be fair to the poor horse!!

Other than that, he could give up horses all together and go buy a motorbike!
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totally agree with this. Its a horse, not a robot:rolleyes:
 
Katt said:
What else can you do though, most sellers won't agree trial periods. If you wait without comitting to buying the horse is sold to someone who is prepared to move quickly. The horse may be a long way making numerous pre-purchase visits impractical.

In an ideal world it would be lovely to really get to know a horse before buying but realistically it often isn't possible. Sellers are so quick to dismiss people as timewasters and plaster "NO TIMEWASTERS" all over their adverts that buyers are pressed into moving quickly if they like the horse. For heavens sake I've missed out on two horses because they sold before I could even view them the first time, never mind going back for a dozen different visits.
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i do agree and i know its hard, but the market is awful just now so there are always plenty of horses to look at:)....... I booked B&B's and stayed over to go and view again the second day sometimes. My new horse I went to view on the Saturday, went back the next day with my RI for a lesson, back again to hack out and then back down for the vetting. I paid a deposit after the first viewing to ensure I got first refusal as the sellers were worried about timewasting-it was a risk I was willing to take tho. I also did a lot of digging round with the ponyclub/ridingclub and instructors I knew to find out what he was like out and about etc. It's so difficult tho and I know I was lucky to be able to do this.... I would be reluctant to buy a horse without going through this process though as it's such a gamble, its impossible to be really sure about a horse from just one ride (well, it is for me) and knowing my limitations I know I have to be bloomin sure about what Im taking on and that Im making the right decision. Someone more experienced and confident, and someone perhaps more willing to work with issues might not mind so much- but I know Im not that person and I think the point Im trying to make is that other purchasers who may be like me, have a responsibility to try their best to go through the trialling process as thoroughly and best they can to avoid putting sellers in a position like the OP(which is totally unfair) or to avoid having to re-sell the unfortunate horse and unsettle it even more.
 
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