Some good news for me. But realy not shore how i feel.

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LauraWheeler

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As alot of you know i've been looking for a new job and home for Herbie, charlie brown and I. Well things are starting to look up alittle. My OHs landlady has said I can move in with OH. Charlie will come to and she has also said i can have a field for Herbs. This should be great news as it will give me time to sort my head out and look for the perfect job.
OH rang just now and said i could move in on Sat. I know i should be so so happy and i am, honest, but i feel so sad at the same time. I'm going to leave Lucys stable, Her field, the watermeadow (where she spent hours in the river upto her belly eating weeds) and i will leave all the places i used to ride her. It feels abit like i'm leaving her behind.
I know this probably sounds like madness but i can't help it. I'm sat here in tears now when i know i should be happy.
 
Aw bless hun.. Have a good cry. Remember that you will always have those lovely memories with you in your head. You'll hopefully have lots of hugs and support when you move in with your OH, and lots of new friends and experiences to come...xxx
 
Hugs :( I have never commented on your threads about Lucy but I have always followed them. It sounds like such a good opportunity for you. Lucy will never be forgotten and you will always have your memories and photos of her, but maybe this move can help you to start fresh with Herbie and help you to move on?
 
Awww huge hugs hunny :) I think it will be good for you, you will never ever forget Lucy, she will always be with you, both in your heart and in your memories. She is running free now so you won't be leaving her behind. You will find that when you look towards the future, she will still be there, becuase she is always with you :) xx
 
Oh :( I know exactly how you feel hun, its perfectly normal (I hope!) I have to move and leave here and feel a bit like I will be leaving Will and Cat, they still feel so close here. But truely, they will be with us wherever we go Laura.....promise. xxxx
 
Thanks guys. I know it's silly she will always come with me wherever i go. But i don't do change very well but Lucy was always there to hold my hand before and this time i have to do it without her. My OH has been so amazing through all this. He's such a kind and caring person and i love him so much which is making me feel bad for not feeling excited about moving in with him.

heather_bambi you are prob right i need a fresh start with Herbs. He is just left at the mo as i can't face taking him on those hacks. Remembering Lucy and also the situation at the mo doesn't make me feel like i can do him either :( Poor boy he deserves better.
 
Vizslak said:
Oh :( I know exactly how you feel hun, its perfectly normal (I hope!) I have to move and leave here and feel a bit like I will be leaving Will and Cat, they still feel so close here. But truely, they will be with us wherever we go Laura.....promise. xxxx
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(((((((hugs)))))))) I'm glad this seems normal though i was starting to feel like an ungreatful cow. I just don't know how i feel. I should be happy we're not going to be homeless at the end of the month.
 
Ditto, when I got the cottage on thursday I drove home happy and excited and relieved, when I got near home I looked on the hill, I wanted to see them, I wanted to rush back and tell them I had somewhere and everything was ok, I was in floods of tears by the time I got in the door and felt ridiculous for being that way. I have worked so tirelessly for 2 months to try and find a house for me and the dogs, I should have been over the moon and jumping for joy, but I really wasn't, I was heart broken.
It will be fine though, I don't do change well either, especially when its forced upon me.
Just remember Lucy will still be there to hold your hand, every step of the way x
 
being in a similar position once, its hard you will be able to cope better, keep posititve keep busy she was lucky with you you have to move on we all go one day sadly and look forward to a fresh start and remember happy memories or maybe get another in your new place !
 
Echo those who say that you will take Lucy with you wherever you go, and I am guessing that for this move you will have to hold Herbies hoof a bit, he has had and will have a lot of change to go through too. I think that helping him may well help you, so that you both benefit from the change in the long run.
Good luck with it all
 
Thankyou Vizslak hopefully things are on the up for both of us now. My OH has been talking about putting more picture hangers up to put pics of Lucy on the wall. He even said he would take some of his down to make room. So i guess she will be with me everywhere there. His landlady has even said i can plant one of those roses called Lucy (that someone gave me links to) in the garden.
 
Yes yorksG I will have to hold poor Herbies hoof. He got shoved from piller to post before i had him but i hope he will be ok this time as i will be with him.
Also he's going home. OH lives in the new forest. Maybe he'll recognise it from his early years.
 
I am so sorry. I had no idea you had lost Lucy. Hvent been online for a while and used to read all your posts about her, she certaintly sounded like a special girl. All you have to remember is she will always be with you in your heart no matter were you move to. And all you willl have to do is close your eyes and she will be there xxx.
 
Thankyou berry I think I still have some guilt for not being there for her when she needed me most. I know everyone keeps telling me not to feel guilty but i just still feel like i let her down when she needed me and now it feels like i'm abandoning her again. Sounds crazy doesn't it.
 
No it doesnt sound crazy it sounds normal. It will get easier. You will soon be smiling inside with all happy memories you had with her instead of hurting and thinking about the things you could of done.
Chin up start thinking about the future x x x
 
Thankyou MrsM Knowing Lucy she would probably give me a great big kick up the arse and tell me to get on with it and to get on with Herbs as well.
Hope your feeling ok and are taking it easy.

Thankyou berry I need to try to look at this more positively and look at the future more positively to as when i try all i see is no more Lucy :( But i need to think about Herbie and Charlie Brown now. (not that Charlie minds to much he gets lots more cuddles in bed at the mo)
 
I'm poddling along nicely thanks lass :). Cutting down on the painkillers; as with all things, the pain eases, it has to. You have a lovely future to look forward to and Lucy would want that.

So, when next you're feeling down, think on, Lucy and I will be swinging our legs ready to boot! :D

Have a hug

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LauraWheeler said:
heather_bambi you are prob right i need a fresh start with Herbs. He is just left at the mo as i can't face taking him on those hacks. Remembering Lucy and also the situation at the mo doesn't make me feel like i can do him either :( Poor boy he deserves better.
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You and Herbs can go and find new hacks together :)
I do hope you're okay :(
K x
 
Charlie Brown will look after you, and Herbie might even surprise you:) And Lucy will go with you, just like Barney came with me. xxx
 
sounds like lucy's been sorting something out for you! as spudlet says, she'll go with you, she always will. And what an opportunity to get everything straightened out! OH, charlie Brown and Herbie will look after you i'm sure!
 
Thankyou Spudlet Charlie Brown has been so cute lately. When I cry at night he licks the tears off my face. Herbie had a go aswell when i was grooming him bless him he can be sweet sometimes.

jenhunt thankyou to. We'll be a family at last just without Lucy :( But your all right she will be there in spirit and i hope she will stay with me forever closer than she's ever been as now she lives in my heart.
 
I dont think you should worry too much about feeling low and a little empty. Its all part of the transition it will have been gut wrenching for you losing Lucy but now you are about to start the next chapter in the book that is your life.

I thoroughly recommend sitting down and having a really good grizzle to clear your emotions just dont do it just before you have to go to the shops as its difficult explaining away sunglasses in the rain.

I understand your dislike of change I always used to be slated for it at work but life will go on and you will manage to adapt to a new rythmn of life.

Dont look back with regret on what you are missing out on. Look back with a grin at what you enjoyed and look forward with anticipation of what fun may well be just around the next corner.
 
Thankyou Flibble. I'm glad it's not just me who doesn't like change though. My life is changing so fast at the mo and it just feels like i am loosing control sometimes. I know it will all be ok and this move is the best thing for Herbs, charlie brown and I. I just feel so exausted and need time to sort myself out. :( :(
 
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