Sorry, another rant. Am even more cross this time. *REALLY, REALLY, STUPIDLY LONG*

the only way to get through this is to look after yourself only.

I've been there, done it and got the T-Shirt! By trying to help others out in the past, with both handling of horses and even taking people to shows as I had a spare place....people came to expect it. Then when I couldn't help, take them etc....they turned a bit *****ty.....which upset me a bit...I mean, we ARE allowed to say no....right??

OH got a bit cross with me and said 'Right! no more lending a helpful hand....and no more taking people places!'...

So after that I just said no, no, no...sorry, no...

The crunch came when I was loading up for a show and one of the girls saw an empty side to the trailer...

She got most aggrieved because I 'didn't offer the take her!' to the show...before I got to speak, OH came round the corner and tore her off a strip, asking her just where she got the idea that we were her personal horse-transporting service...?

Never another bad word again! :D

You have to become evil I'm afraid...sure, peeps will ask me stuff once in a while, but I feel so much better in myself just looking out for mine......
 
What a bad situation. You have been very kind and it's not your fault that they are ungratefull. I would of done the same in your position. I remember being in the riding school, and as nice as it was i often dreamed someone would offer me the chance to ride a really nice horse, and do something a bit different to a lesson, even if it was a one of, which it would be.
 
I think your stressing yourself out over too many little things, I know your obviously being very helpful, but it sounds like its going to turn you grey!

I'd ease off, just concentrate on your own riding/time with your horse and stop worrying about what others think.

chill :D
 
Ah i remember your old post, Im sorry but did she forget that this was a favour and it is YOUR horse and you call the shots? you know YOUR horse and how YOUR horse will react in different situations, so she needs to realise that what you say..goes. By the sounds of it you are a genuine, nice person and deserve a medal yourself. As for the other two, they should be grateful for the help you give anyway, I can understand them being nervous and all, but they cant totally depend on you for everything, you have your own horse and life to care about. Keep standing your ground, it'll blow over, and as for the girl, if she keeps being miss moody knickers...tell her to sod off, I thought she was actually nice, but needing teaching , but sounds like her manners need some fixing too.
 
I think they are taking advantage of you - if I had someone as nice as you on my yard, help once in a blue moon would be ace, never mind weekly! Next time Sunday rider starts to moan, tell her she can ride with you at the competition - should put her off. Tell Weds novice that if she is unhappy, you can offer her details of several people who will come do the same as you do but charge her by the hour. That should shut her up!

And as for pathetic girl and mother - don't ever let her near your horse. If she asks, say to her that she was so put out and rude last time that you assumed she would never want to ride your horse again, and that you have other plans for him now. Lesson learnt for her and mother....

God, I sound like a right b**ch

Brilliant - I think I am also a bitch and have learnt the hard way of helping people and getting no return and I know we don't do things for returns but some thanks doesn't go amiss.
 
Sorry to be blunt (maybe I am a heartless cow :) ) but if people don't talk to you (or give you 'evils') who cares?! You just get on with your bits and if people want to talk to you, fine, if they don't, so what?!

I think you are too nice and people don't really appreciate you. Perhaps say to people if they want help, you are free on x day/evening but you do have your own life too!
 
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