Strange horsey people you've had the misfortune of meeting!

holeymoley

holeymoley

Well-Known Member
Joined
18 November 2012
Messages
4,798
Visit site
Just curious to see how many other bizarrely strange horsey people are out there that you've come across!

We have a woman at the yard who is strange to say the least. We all have ample space for stuff yet, she takes all her rugs home everyday ! can you imagine the state of her car?! She also sweeps the same patch outside her door to an inch of its life, so much so the concrete is wearing down. The other thing I seen her doing the other day was checking her bolts were done up by shining a torch on them, even though we have a substantial ray of light coming from the numerous light bulbs in the barn! :rolleyes:

So c'mon lets hear yours :p
 
I had a woman at my last yard who told me she "didn't like the gut sounds my horse was making" Really? why would you have your ear pressed up against the side of my not very amused yearling, loose in the field at that too! Another who offered my then very novice daughter the ride of her mare who was a known bolter who she wouldn't ride herself. Oh and the one who kept her pony in as a 'punishment' for being 'naughty'. I've met so many damn idiots over the years the mind just boggles. I'm glad that I'm on a yard that is so small now, and we all get on so well. No bitching and drama!
 
Since looking for a horse to ride/loan/share I've met some right oddballs. I've led a sheltered horsey life up to now because I was lucky to have grown up in a family having them at home.

I can't get over the number of people owning (and sometimes riding :rolleyes:) horses who just dont have a bloody clue, being told things by other people who also dont have a clue.

I went to ride a 14hh coloured cob that was on blue chip, topline cubes and various other supplements but hadnt been sat on let alone ridden (and supposedly schooled by a CHAPS judge) in a month of sundays. Cue me getting on this "quiet" horse and being dropped and rolled on in the middle of the road before it bucked and farted all the way back to the yard, when she told me what she was feeding it (and not turning it out :o) had more rugs on than soft mick aswell.

The other was a supposed 14hh cob, that was 13hh at best (the grooms tried to tell me it was 14.2hh), 4yr old (again at best the poor sod) and only after it had dumped me on the floor transpired it hadnt been trotted or cantered in the whole time this woman knew/had it :rolleyes:
Then some soppy woman came over claiming to have loaned it 2 years previously (the mind boggles) but after watching her have a "lesson" on some scatty tb type which she was petrified off and would only trot about 3 strides before collapsing and grabbing onto the saddle. So if she did loan it, its unsuprising he ended up uncooperative/didnt actually understand.

The one between these was a lovely mare, forward going if a little green, but the owner was just slightly nutty. Going onto someones yard I wouldnt feel comfortable just taking over and doing things my way, but thats almost what she expected. Until I didnt do it the way she wanted and then she became abrupt so I didnt go again.

Then the ones I knew for a long time who were obsessed with living out a natural life. Which meant dragging the poor sod out until it dropped down in the field and couldnt get up, or got gangrene from an untreated abcess because "its got flat feet so its always lame".

Or the woman obsessed with buying nice horses, wouldnt actually ride them but would tell everyone she was.

Resigned myself to saving up and getting my own, and hoping I dont get too rusty in the meantime!
 
Last edited:
One person I know has a split personality, and it was like walking on eggshells trying to decide what to say that would not cause later damage to the horse. One was a greedy, lazy lying cheat, who threatened to let livery horses out loose on the road - worrying thing was, she owned the yard!!

All the current horsey people I associate with are just lovely though - hope I've had my fill of mentals!
 
Last edited:
I know LOTS of strange horsey people - myself probably one of them :o - but they are all lovely. Utterly insane, but lovely :D:D

When I was a teenager I was next door to a lady who treated her horse like her son. Now... I 'baby' my horse and use nicknames and I chatter away to him all the time, but she would have full blown conversations with him (although they were rather one-sided).

As in, my chatter:
"Come on boy, let's get this rug on. Cold tonight! New rug - stay away from ***!"

Her chatter:
"Would you prefer the blue rug or the red one sweetheart?" [Pause]. "Is that the red one?" [Pause]. "Good choice! Let's put the red one on. Oh you're so smart... Let me see... No, look this way. That's it. Now, did I tell you about the new horse in the field? [Pause.] No? Ok... well, he rips rugs. So darling, what you need to do is - are you listening? - as I was saying, you need to stay away from him. He's the big bay one. Do you understand? Yes?"

This really was constant - she would even apologise to him if someone 'interrupted' to say hello or ask her something. She was totally batty... But you know what? She was harmless and her horse wanted for NOTHING so I loved hearing her really. If anything she made me chat to my horse more as I felt less self-conscious about it! :o:D I lost touch with her and heard a few years later from someone else that her horse had died; cried my eyes out for her... :(

Someone on here posted a fair while ago on a 'viewings from hell' thread about a lady who said she'd 'asked the horse and it didn't want to be ridden today' - made me laugh a lot but part of me did also wonder whether it was the same lady.

Then I've met plenty of crazy split-personality 'butter wouldn't melt/Lady Macbeth' types... :eek: I steer clear of them!
 
Yep, seen stables painted to reflect auras, requires expensive visit from long haired kaftan wearing crystal waving person to pick the right colour though. Someone who decided to cure their horses head shy behaviour by hanging feed sacks from the stable roof. Have seen it work with one in the middle. She had about 20 and the poor horse was petrified, it couldn't move for the things! Also different feeds each day so the horse didn't get 'bored'. Literally different brands and whatever was nearest! Someone tried to sell me a horse that could only be shod by a parelli farrier, obviously nailed them on with a carrot stick ! Oh, and our next door neighbour buys bags of feed that are broken or spoilt for his scruffy herd , turns out they look quite good on Chudleys Original!!!
 
Had one YO padlock horse in is stable because we had given notice and was out day to move - she didn't want us to leave.....! Police were involved which eventually ended up with us loading the horse on the main road because we were not allowed to on the yard... :/

Another, mucked out into carrier bags! Also had one lady who was a right jekle and Hyde character. Talking to you nice as anything one minute then phoning you up screaming down the phone because you had done something wrong/awful/life threatening/said good morning/ in her eyes. She was extremely exhausting!

I have a rather long list of these, highly amusing! ;)
 
Had a livery here once who was into "natural horsemanship"; boy was she weird - when she started hanging Rose Quartz crystals around their necks really cracked me up totally.

OK, so someone is gonna now say "but it WORKS"............ ha ha bleddy ha.

A good thing to do if you really wanna meet some fruitcakes is to advertise your horse for sale or loan - that'll do the trick properly and you'll be positively infested with every oddball, fruitcase & downright nutter on the planet.

If you don't believe me then try it and see :)
 
There was a woman at my old yard who bragged loudly at every opportunity about how she was a very well known dressage judge. She's poke us, prod, turn her nose up at our synthetic wintecs and mismatched tack, shout at us across the yard about our shoulder hip heel alignment (we had whizzy mounted games ponies/rode like cowboys and couldn't have cared less about our seats or the colour of our tack), she'd insult and lecture us all at every opportunity, to the point where we used to lead our ponies over the road into the fields before we got on. She turned up whilst we were galloping round the outdoor school vaulting on and off once and tried to tell us how inappropriate it was for teenage girls to be riding so dangerously and what would our parents think about such unladylike behaviour??. Yea yea. Whatever.

One day the school was closed due to a gas leak and we all walked down the yard to find her sat on her daughter's pristine palomino show pony (we'd never seen her judge let alone ride before), hunch backed, feet shoved right through the stirrups, toes down and trying her hardest not to fall off the pony (which was jogging merrily because she was shreiking at him). I swear I've seen first time trekkers with a better seat. The second she saw us she got off the poor po, but not before we'd spent the best part of 10 minutes watching her "ride". That was 15yrs or more ago, and I still remember it like it was yesterday!

I hear she's still lecturing the kids on that yard even now!
 
LittleGinger- I love that story but how sad that the horse died.
Mine is similar- an only employer who used to chat to her horses in a very similar way. She was a very elderly lady but used to go round the whole yard each morning to tell the horses what their day entailed etc
One morning I was mucking out an empty box and heard her next door chatting to a gorgeous big Clydesdale (Clyde!)
Her: what's that dear..... You want to have a sleep? "Pause" of course darling.... Oh yes I know you like straw but I expect you would like to have a lie on shavings now and then "pause" what now? Oh but your so big.... Ok well I can't lead you hang on ...., shouts me " dear please can you pop Clyde into an empty shavings box? For some reason he wants a sleep but he's not keen on lying on his straw" rolled her eyes and shrugged at me!
At this point I admit I figured totally mad! Led Clyde into another box where he promptly led down and went to sleep?!?! She was an amazing old lady but that was one of her best :)
 
poiuytrewq said:
LittleGinger- I love that story but how sad that the horse died.
Mine is similar- an only employer who used to chat to her horses in a very similar way. She was a very elderly lady but used to go round the whole yard each morning to tell the horses what their day entailed etc
One morning I was mucking out an empty box and heard her next door chatting to a gorgeous big Clydesdale (Clyde!)
Her: what's that dear..... You want to have a sleep? "Pause" of course darling.... Oh yes I know you like straw but I expect you would like to have a lie on shavings now and then "pause" what now? Oh but your so big.... Ok well I can't lead you hang on ...., shouts me " dear please can you pop Clyde into an empty shavings box? For some reason he wants a sleep but he's not keen on lying on his straw" rolled her eyes and shrugged at me!
At this point I admit I figured totally mad! Led Clyde into another box where he promptly led down and went to sleep?!?! She was an amazing old lady but that was one of her best :)
Click to expand...

Love that story!

Not every horsey mad person is really that mad or strange, it's often only our perception and judgement and we all know ow rubbish that can be.
 
A livery who feeds her horse in a bucket on a pile of bricks so he doesnt hrt his neck stretching down to the floor, and has a brush head across the front of his stable door so a draft doesnt come under the door....

Have loads but cant think of them right now will come back to this one....

Ohhh the half Knob-strap horses come to mind........ lol
 
Thank god I am on my own yard with my parents so you can guess that supplies a whole load of other issues ;).

If I really need to see strange horsey people I just look at facebook:eek:, I do wonder is it real or an experiment.
 
There's a lady on my yard.

Every time I ride Ned she looks at me like I'm evil, while she runs around with her pony, playing weird games (I know, I'm not one to talk, but I bombproof Ned, I don't even know what she's doing!!). Pony is becoming dangerous and while he's a sweetheart over the fence, I'm quite scared to go in the pen with him! He even chased my mother (no doubt a result of being made to chase this woman)
She says she's done horse psychology, but I see no improvements in this pony. It's quite sad, he's a gorgeous little thing who could be a brilliant in-hand show pony.

She also insists on trying to talk to me for hours on end and pesters my heavily preggers friend (2 weeks left!!!). It makes me wonder!
 
we had one livery who was completely mental. she was explaining to her dog about the mains electrical fencing. she was switching it on and saying, that's it on, then jumping like she had been shocked, then switching it off and saying and that's ok. she must have repeated that half a dozen times. nearly wet myself.

she asked me if the hay steamer was meant to be on, it was another liverys who wasn't there that day. i said no, she said she thought it was on. i told her it couldn;t be as it wasn't plugged in. she was still adamant, had a surreal conversation about it, i had to go over and show her the plug and that it wasn't in the socket. she still wasn't sure.

she was also nasty, i was schooling and she had her dog jumping on and off some jumps to try and freak my horse. another day we were cantering in the school and she walked in almost under her feet and proceeded to walk across the school. we had to take evasive action. when talking about children and that someone had a toddler but was quite a violent type, i had said that i don't hit my son, dog or my horse, she said that really they all needed a good battering now and again. she also caused a lot of problems with her nastiness and lies, she was mad as a box of frogs.

I had someone else tell me i couldn't get my hay from a particular farmer as he was HER farmer! she also told me i wasn't allowed to speak to the people at the property next door because she didn't like them. why are loads of horsey folk mad?
 
Last edited:
I will hold my hands up and admit I've had a reiki lady out to my horse. She told me a lot of stuff that made perfect sense to the amusement of my livery owner!

My boyfriend thinks it's pretty funny that I talk to my horses, although he does too. He's more along the lines of "Dude, really?" when they sneeze on him or "Come on Alf, where'd you hide the labrador?" (shetland didn't come when he whistled them in the dark).
 
When I was a kid there was a lady with two horses on the yard. The horses lived in the lap of luxury, the absolute best of everything & always got anything new, like the first stable rugs as opposed to jute, regular back, saddle & teeth checks back when it was unheard of, the first person to use mixes or supplements, loads of expensive tack. Even had a new horsebox with live-in despite only hacking to local shows. Yet her husband, kids, & herself lived in dire poverty. The kids were only toddlers & from what I remember just whinged a lot. It was only when I got older other adult liveries told me the kids didn't even have decent coats or footwear, other adults on the yard provided essentials & worried for their well being. The kids would have 'toys' like a piece of baler twine as a skipping rope, & dreadlocked hair that every so often would have the plaiting band moved up a bit in, while the horses had more spent on them than a millionaire would.
Other freak is someone who talks in a baby voice to her horse. As in 'who da clever man? Does mummys ickle boy want to have a sleepy in his stable cos the field all wet & cold on da boys tum tum. Does him wike his din dins? Mummys boy was hungwy baba. Oh baby boy, was him in a wush to go playtimes with his ickle friends in da nice field?' And so on ad finitum, usually while mummys little man is barging & carting her all over the show. Same nutter also told me I needed to have a word with my mare. My mare is top dog, although not aggressive or a bully. There was a loose dog in the field, her horse was lay down, my mare rounded up the horses, including him, & chased the snapping chasing dog out. In the course of this she made said horse get up & stand in the herd. But, according to nutter woman, she should have left him sleeping cos 'she should have seen his mummy was on the way to save him from the doggy'.
Tbh, I've met countless nutters, most of which are harmless. Or downright deranged in a selfish cruel way.
 
I was on a yard once where another livery had been given notice to leave. We had got on alright all up to this point but on the morning that she had been told to leave I tried to speak with her (didnt even know she had been given notice at this point if I remember correctly) and recieved a tirade of abuse culminating in ' You cant be friends with me and friends with them, if you're friends with them, then i'm not going to be your friend anymore' I was actually quite upset and shocked at the time but my god......it sounds like a pre-schooler, but she was in her 40's and i'm in my 30's!!!
I didnt keep in touch after she had gone but will talk politely with her if I bump into her.
 
I had a livery (now asked to leave) who could top the weirdest of weird, I actually thinks she needs to see a professional! Don't want to go into details as she is most likely monitoring every post I write on here but let's just say, constant lies, made up friends, made up life, made up Facebook profile she used to message me and other people she's fell out with.......weird!
 
one person on the yard (who's now left!) was such a control freak and a nasty piece of work that we had numerous fallings out.
one day i was driving into the yard and this person was walking to the car park with her instructor who i know well, she waved to me and i waved back, i got out the car and she shouted over to me asking how my horse was.
after she left the nasty person marched up to me ranting and raving saying i had no business talking to any of her friends. after listening to her rantings for a few minutes i just said "are you that desperate you need to pay people to spend time with you?" she said no, ***** is my friend. the next day the "friend" came back to give her husband a lesson but left straight after the lesson to come and talk to me, we had a cuppa and a catch up then she went home. the nasty person was disgusted and everytime someone came onto the yard after that she would literally grab them in the hope they wouldn't talk to me! lol
 
I read this thread with trepidation. I was worried I would be described, but would I recognise myself anyway, gulp!
 
I was on a yard with a nasty piece of work, I was riding in the indoor school and she returned from a show and came in and stated she needed the school to turn out in. I told her I'd be an hour but was not going to get off so she could turn out. It turns out the pony had been kicking at its belly at the show she took it that it was being naughty so wanted to put in indoor on return and chase round school :eek :
Pony actually had colic which she blamed me for by not letting her chase in the school.

Further investigation found the pony was riddled in tumours so was PTs but for weeks I had nothing but abuse from her stating I killed her horse:D

Another one while I was on livery was a guy on the show jumping circuit had a number of horses in the yard. His wife was in jumping arena and said horse stopped and she fell, he picked a large plank of wood up and beat the living day lights out of the horse, then went after the woman. Very odd I didn't witness it but it was all over yard I thought it must be an exaggeration until I seen the police arive so there must have been some truth to it.
 
Once had a nutty YO who moaned about the smallest of things - but they were so ridiculous, she seemed embarrassed to say them to your face. You would speak to her, leave the backroom/yard, come back half an hour later and find you' d been left a note. Eventually we got so fed up our daily telling off, that we did a moonlight flit with our five horses......... and...... ahem... left her a note!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top