Struggling to re home my cats

[beutifulwobble]

Since my baby arrived my cats have had their noses put well & truly out of joint!!! I have tried local adverts to find them a new hoe but o luck. I really don't want to take them to a rescue centre as they were rescues originally.
I am wracked with guilt but they are terrible around the baby.
I am in north Bedfordshire xxxx

 

[s4sugar]

How come? Many people have cats & babies so what is the problem?

I could ask why not rehome the baby? Sounds flippant but what have you done to make the cats at home with the new addition?

 

[webble]

They may get used to the baby. If they were from a centre there may have been a clause in the contract that any problems they have to go back to the centre

 

[Rose Folly]

You need to persevere! And you owe it to the cats! You can't just take animals on and dump them when the going gets a bit tough.

Get advice. Your vet! The Cats Protection League or whatever it is now called! More knowledgeable friends!

Sorry to sound harsh but I see this all the time.

 

[beutifulwobble]

Gee thanks that makes me feel great. I did want constructive advice. I have spoken to vets and behaviour people. We have tried feliway and positive reinforcement. They ump on the sides in the kitchen, jump on me whilst I am feeding her, spray all round her things and have started clawing the furniture.

They never did this before I had her and for those lovely kind souls who are making flippant comments - we both nearly died so thank you!

I have persevered for 16 weeks so its not a light choice.

Any helpful constructive ideas would be lovely xxx

 

[Hairy Old Cob]

Work at it you had the Cats before the Sprog

 

[CLM]

I'm really sorry to hear you are having problems with your cats, a new baby can really unsettle them. It must be a real worry. Have you tried giving the cats space away from the baby, so that they feel they can get away if they need to? If they are worse when you are feeding, then can you put them outside when you feed? As for jumping on the work tops, every cat I've ever had has had to be taught not to do that, and my boy will still have a sneaky jump up if he thinks I'm not looking. Ditto scratching furniture, pretty normal cat behaviour. The most worrying issue is the spraying, this is concerning, I couldn't live with that, and I suspect not many people would be prepared to take on a cat that sprays. The problem is the rehoming centres are absolutely full of cats and kittens needing homes without any problems at all. If the spraying continues maybe you could try a farm or stable yard type of home for them?
Failing that, you may have to very sadly PTS. You just can't have cats that spray inside.

I assume they have been neutered?

 

[jenniaddams]

Nobody has made a flippant comment. It's just something far too common...sprog comes along, so other responsibilities get punted. Regardless of how easy or hard your pregnancy or labour were, you owe the animals that you took responsibility for.

Give them space to themselves...no baby at all. Give you/baby space...no cats.
Are they neutered?
Scratching/furniture climbing etc...standard cat behaviour. Needs worked on through reinforcement. Spraying can be related to stress so I would say that working on creating a home for both the cats and the baby with own spaces may improve the spraying issue.

Ultimately, if no home is forthcoming, you could try CPL etc. They would take them on.

 

[Archangel]

This might be a bonkers idea but could you put them in a cattery for a couple of weeks to give you time to restore order, clean up the wee and take stock properly. It might break them of their behaviour (she says hopefully).

 

[Elsbells]

This might be a bonkers idea but could you put them in a cattery for a couple of weeks to give you time to restore order, clean up the wee and take stock properly. It might break them of their behaviour (she says hopefully).

Good advice RR.

 

[beutifulwobble]

Hi all,

They are neutered female tortoise shells. They have had feliway, anti stress tablets, time away from me/ baby etc. as I said I have been trying for 4 mths so it's not like I am giving up after 2wks.

I am desperate to keep them and not have to remove them but I can't think of anything else to try.

 

[suestowford]

How old are the cats? Sometimes they get very set in their ways as they get older.

 

[joelb]

OP, have to agree with some of the views on re-homing, it’s a huge frustration to me that animals of any species as passed on so readily but also agree that the spraying is completely unacceptable from a hygiene perspective. Do you have a garage or shed you could turn into living accommodation for them so they are still yours but with no indoor access; it’s an ideal time of year to transition. Shame you’re not my way as we’re looking for a couple of yard cats to combat a huge rodent problem and unbelievably there are no semi-ferals available in Shropshire!!

 

[beutifulwobble]

They are 11 yrs old. They are currently living in the shed, which is done up like a palace but I am worried about them living out in the winter.

I am gutted and frustrated that I even have to consider it ( I think people think I am doing this frivolously) I had no idea when I got them at 22 ( ten yrs ago) that I would have a baby and also how bad they would be! Talking to other tortie owners they are the worst when it comes to things like this xxx

 

[s4sugar]

So buy a heated bed or a heat lamp.


When did the problems start? While you were pregnant or after you brought baby haome?

 

[Dogrose]

They are probably a bit old to change over to being farm cats, it seems a bit mean when they are used to being house cats having to live rough at their age.
I don't know the answer, I went out and got a kitten as soon as I found out I was pregnant so my kids could grow up with a pet (she was a tortie). I did have an awfully behaved Havana when they were a little older that would wee in ridiculous places (he would get into bed with you, lie down and wee) but he had spinal problems so that might have been a factor, and another cat that would wee in the toy box, I just put up with it, washed things a lot, and no one got ill from it. I wouldn't have dreamed of rehoming the cats.

 

[beutifulwobble]

Dog rose, I had hoped for the same thing. I grew up with pets too. I think I will just see how it goes. I am saddened by people's unsupportive and accusatory tones though xx

 

[beutifulwobble]

Also the probs started towards the end of my pregnancy and got worse when we came home xx

 

[Supertrooper]

You say you've tried behaviourist but have you had someone come out to you?

Can I recommend a lady called Vicky Halls. She is very very good and it sounds like you are desperate. It won't be cheap or a quick fix BUT it's an option

 

[Antw23uk]

Sadly your chances of rehoming them are slim. You will struggle to find a rescue center to take them because they are full to bursting!

Have you tried local cat charities that dont have a central hub but have fosterers which potential new owners go to see them in a home enviroment?

This might be a bad thing to say but it seems all too common in the horsey world but have you thought about having them pts?

 

[AmyMay]

Speaking as someone who tried to re-home her cats - impossible.

Can't see why a baby has had such an impact on them tbh.

 

[Loulou2002]

I moved out of my property 3 years ago and my two cats couldn't come with me to the new place so i have them living at the yard.....which is ours. The oldest cat would have been 14 at the time (17 this year!) and she is fine there. They both love being outside in the summer and in the winter they sleep in the tackroom. I don't have heat lamps or anything like that. Just to reassure you if you are worried about them being outside.

 

[Zero00000]

My cats turned into absolute horrors when my son was born,
I had recently become a widowed women, new baby, living miles away from my family, with these 2 cats that where *h*ting everywhere, on my bed, in the cot, jumping out the windows, clawing, jumping up on the sides, but guess what... nearly 5 years on, I still have them, I took them on, and they are as much my responsibility as my children are, I wont lie, I did think about rehoming them, but, they came from a rescue center, and I didnt want them going back!
I persevered with them, house move seemed to help lots, but before that, I was giving them treats and fussing them when the baby was asleep, let them know they are still wanted, they soon turned back into the cats I knew they were, my son came into their home, and things changed, to think they will adapt quickly, which 4 months out of their lives is a short amount of time,

Its not stress, it change of routine and rank in the 'pecking order' dont give up on them!

 

[YasandCrystal]

I know you said you tried Feliway diffusers, but have you tried Zylkene? That is a natural product and reportedly very good for destressing dogs, cats ,horses. Maybe a stint on that would help.

 

[Gleeful Imp]

I think people are being exceptionally harsh on the OP, she is reaching the end of her tether and has asked for help. She hasn't blithely swanned around and dumped her cats. She is facing a real problem, living with endless cat spraying is vile no matter how much you love them. Mine did it all over my new fellas clothes, shoes, where he slept in the bed ..... Eventually all accepted each other but was vile.

My cousin went through he'll with 2 torties who took to endless spraying - no baby involved - and it was he'll. the vets couldn't help, she tried everything, she ended up pts after 2 years of non stop spraying because of the mental health impact.

If you can make your garage a palace, pop in heated lamps etc they will be fine. I'm afraid the chances of rehoming are slim, so it's either try the cattery option and the palace or say goodbye.

If they were mine, I'd go palace option, but I have moved heaven and earth to keep my kits with me. And this seems better than the other option to me.

Good luck whatever you do.

 

[ILuvCowparsely]

This happens a lot baby comes along animals pushed out for what ever reason. It always saddens me as the animals get traumatised after sudden changes.


Charities will only take them if they have space or if a foster cares to make extra temp space.


1. what are the cats actually doing that makes you feel they are a threat
noses out danger etc???

2. can you not find one room for the cats to say in then when baby goes to sleep let them out.

baby screaming is or can be scary to cats that have never experienced the sound / smell before.


When baby is a sleep make a fuss of them make them feel wanted
something like this

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Canvas-In...UK_Pet_Supplies_Cats&var=&hash=item3a6677718c.

when you are feeding the baby etc is there not a room you can go into where they can't see you or be with you???

Some cats are attention seekers and they see you as their owner and baby a competitor for your affection.

|This could be no different than having 2 kids where they both want your attention and do what they know and can do to get it.
You need to make sure they feel loved wanted.

 

[Clodagh]

I suspect that those of you who are abusing the OP are perhaps not parents? Children are more important than animals. Cats are dangerous and dirty and if they are scratching and peeing around the baby or her stuff that is unacceptable.
A shed will be fine, especially if they have a warm bed. It is better than the alternative!
This post is not aimed at the people who have been constructive - but to suggest the cats have more rights as they were there first, perhaps get rid of the baby first...OMG.

 

[ILuvCowparsely]

what you should have done prior to birth, is make the nursery out of bounds to the cats. This way they learn this room is a no go area also reducing the petting before the birth would also make it more the normal not to have so much attention.

That said what you can do now is still keep nursery door shut when baby is sleeping.
set aside part of each day to make a fuss of the cats. Allow for the fact you will be busier now and become more irritable.
Remember cats can sense when you are stressed.

Remember both needs some of your time and affection

 

[ILuvCowparsely]

I suspect that those of you who are abusing the OP are perhaps not parents? Children are more important than animals. Cats are dangerous and dirty and if they are scratching and peeing around the baby or her stuff that is unacceptable.
A shed will be fine, especially if they have a warm bed. It is better than the alternative!
This post is not aimed at the people who have been constructive - but to suggest the cats have more rights as they were there first, perhaps get rid of the baby first...OMG.

When you have an animal most of the life then choose to add a baby into the mix you should plan ahead as I posted above. Keep cats out of the nursery, why should the cats be imprisoned in a shed when they had the use of the house??? There is time for both to have access to the house.

I am not a parent never want them (thats another story) Too many pets get pushed out when baby comes like they are disposable. I see / hear this all too often and the poor animal gets pts or put in a pen

 

[joelb]

why should the cats be imprisoned in a shed

Don’t think anyone was suggesting imprisoning them – it’s a perfectly reasonable compromise if OP wants to keep them and if they’re so distressed then maybe they’d actually be happier. Cats get to stay in the environment they know and it beats shoving them from pillar to post or dumping them back into rescue.