Struggling to re home my cats

[ILuvCowparsely]

Don’t think anyone was suggesting imprisoning them – it’s a perfectly reasonable compromise if OP wants to keep them and if they’re so distressed then maybe they’d actually be happier. Cats get to stay in the environment they know and it beats shoving them from pillar to post or dumping them back into rescue.

Well depending on a shed size, its not really their environment is it? they probably have never been in it. I think keeping nursery door shut and feeding baby when cats not around etc as I posted above is what is recommended as a way round this difficult situation for the OP. Unless she puts a cat flap into he shed door so they can go in and out as they wish.

So many are dumped or people threatening to PTS unless charities take them on, its hard for the charities to select those who really will PTS and those who are really in a bad situation and need the cat to go into the pens.

 

[AmyMay]

I suspect that those of you who are abusing the OP are perhaps not parents?

Abuse? Where?

And no, I'm not a parent. But I've been the child of parents who've had cats all their lives. When my siblings and I came along there was simply no problem.

 

[suestowford]

Can't see why a baby has had such an impact on them tbh.

I can. My cat is very anxious, and always has been. Any changes to her house send her into a terrible digestive turmoil and eruptions happen. Last year we had builders in for three days and she got so stressed she became seriously ill. She nearly died. I too have tried Feliway and Zylkene but have had no success with either.
If I had a baby she would most likely react in the same way, it's just the way she is. I do sympathise with you OP, it must be a very difficult situation.

 

[tessybear]

No chance of giving them to a centre, they are the type who would be overlooked at a rescue too. Mainly young brightly coloured ( gingers, whites, unsual markings) go quickly, there are a lot of torties about.

Stick at it, its a big change it may take up to a year. Otherwise work around the baby and cats, so perhaps build a run onto the shed ? In the day cats are outside with access to the shed should they wish.

And at night when baby is in bed allow them into the house perhaps an area such as a kitchen ? It can be done.


P.s i don't see any 'abuse' anywhere on here towards OP.

 

[FinnishLapphund]

Maybe if you, Beutifulwobble, had been clearer in your first post about what you had tried, and for how long, the first three replies would have sounded differently? Instead your first post just said vaguely that

Since my baby arrived my cats have had their noses put well & truly out of joint!!! I have tried local adverts to find them a new hoe but o luck. I really don't want to take them to a rescue centre as they were rescues originally.
I am wracked with guilt but they are terrible around the baby.
I am in north Bedfordshire xxxx

How were they supposed to know, what being terrible around the baby means according to you, or that you had "spoken to vets and behaviour people", tried Feliway etc.? Plus, some people doesn't read the whole thread before replying, so not everyone might have noticed the added info from you. Or perhaps everyone's replies would have sounded the same regardless, who knows?

Since you say that some of it began a while before you gave birth, it sounds to me as if it isn't so much the baby, without something to do with you and the cats, that have lead to this change in their behaviour. So I agree with the advice about not only speaking to a behaviourist, without also meeting one, you might be doing things that you doesn't notice yourself, but the cats do, and reacts on it, which a behaviourist might notice. When spraying or peeing etc., is part of a cat's changed behaviour, it is usually either a sign of a physical problem or their way to object about something that has happened/is happening/changed in their situation, and not something they do without reasons.

Besides, if it is so that they need a home without children, then children are everywhere, you didn't have a child when you got them, x years later you have a baby, if you rehome them to someone that doesn't have children now, maybe they will have in the future, and the cats are back on square one, rehome with an older couple/person, and they might have grandchildren... And as already been said, with so many cats needing a home, there isn't many persons that is willing/able to rehome cats with behavioural problems which includes randomly spraying indoors.


P.S.

They never did this before I had her and for those lovely kind souls who are making flippant comments - we both nearly died so thank you!

I presume that the last comment refers to that you and your baby nearly died while you gave birth? If so, I'm glad that you're both okay, and here with us, but I don't understand what it has to do with you wanting to rehome your cats?

 

[Fransurrey]

It's true that tortie kitties can be more sensitive, but don't give up. Fit a catflap to the shed and put nice fluffy beds in there. Buy some catnip or sow some in the garden. Much better than zylkene! When baby is sleeping, visit the kitties in the shed, make a little snuggle area if you have room! My cat was stressed due to builders and I sat in the shed on a cushion leaning against his bed. Fell asleep a few times! I can't see where you are as I'm on the phone, but if you're in Surrey I can give you lots of catnip, as I grow it and deal, he he!

The shed isn't a permanent move. Once they have their own place they may relax naturally. Alternative is to go back to a cat room and treat it like an introduction to a new cat. Own room for a while, then add a baby thing to the room, presented with a treat, before removing, then placing food on a dirty bib, that sort of thing. Please don't give up now. Cats and babies do work, but sometimes they need some help, although I can understand that as a new mum you're up against it. Short term, if the spraying is in certain places, put a piece of cardboard there with puppy training pads to catch any run off. Absorbs well and is all disposable. I used this when my old cat was upset due to an intruder cat using my garden. Good luck. X

 

[MagicMelon]

Nobody has made a flippant comment. It's just something far too common...sprog comes along, so other responsibilities get punted. Regardless of how easy or hard your pregnancy or labour were, you owe the animals that you took responsibility for.

Ultimately, if no home is forthcoming, you could try CPL etc. They would take them on.

Too true. What have you actually tried OP? Have you tried giving the cats lots of nice attention whenever the baby is near? If they jump on you when you're changing her or spray in her room then simply close the door and keep them out of her room and where you change her?! Our cats live down one end of our house - basically our bedroom (which leads directly into our 1 yr old sons bedroom) is out of bounds for the cats. Not for any reason other than them being Bengals and therefore they like to get into stuff (pull out his nappies from his box etc.). My cats where a bit wary of my son when he first arrived but I just gave them plenty of space and lots of attention when he was sleeping, they may well simply be craving your attention as its probably all gone (and on your baby instead) so who can blame them. If you really can't be bothered to try and sort the problem, then you have no choice but to give them to the CPL. They already have far too many cats, but if it means them not being PTS then you owe it to them.

With regards to your comment about almost dying when having your baby, I also dont see what this has to do with your cats?! My birth went very badly as well, but my cats (and dog) are still very much with me...

 

[MagicMelon]

I suspect that those of you who are abusing the OP are perhaps not parents? Children are more important than animals. Cats are dangerous and dirty and if they are scratching and peeing around the baby or her stuff that is unacceptable.
A shed will be fine, especially if they have a warm bed. It is better than the alternative!
This post is not aimed at the people who have been constructive - but to suggest the cats have more rights as they were there first, perhaps get rid of the baby first...OMG.

Rubbish. Cats are not "dangerous and dirty" - have you even HAD cats before?! If so, you must have been doing something seriously wrong with them! It selfish to say "children and more important than animals", at the end of the day the owner has CHOSEN these animals and taken on the responsibility of giving them a nice life, yet a baby comes along and suddenly these poor cats are ignored and terrified by a screaming infant, and now the owner is considering killing them?! Seriously, you find that acceptable?! Good grief, I'm sad to think you own animals of any kind BTW, I am a parent, not that that makes ANY difference.

 

[Rose Folly]

I fear I was one of the 3 or so first responders who 'abused' the poster.

Perhaps if OP had been a bit more specific it would have helped. I still feel the case could be solved, and that, as Leviathan said, some preliminary work before the baby's birth would have been constructive.

Anyway it is too late for that now. But some good advice of various sorts has been offered which I suggest should be considered.

I can't speak for others who were straight talking in their answers, but would like to assure Clodagh and others that I am indeed a parent, nearly died from an ectopsy with major complications and then was extremely ill before and after the birth of my child. However, and advised by, among others, my excellent doctor who was interested in animal/infant interaction, I did my homework and our 3 dogs and 1 cat behaved admirably, apart from stealing cuddly toys.

Nobody is putting children down - but in most places companion animals are part of the family, and as such need to be assured they still have a place in that family.