Struggling :(

[blakey]

Im having real trouble with my mare.
Its totally not her fault, she is kind, sweet & loving, but she is unbrocken, and im having trouble finding the time, inclination & most importantly the money to do it

She has no tack what so ever, apart from a bridle, and i just dont have the money to buy her a saddle, rugs and pay someone to help me, ect ect.
Before anyone jumps at me, i know that it is something i should have thought about before i got her but hindsight is a wonderful thing, and it appears that sainsburys dont recruit people with 10 years of retail and customer service experiance, they seems to prefer 17 yr olds with none

I really though t that i could do this, i was under no illusion that it would be easy at all, but i just didnt anticipate just how hard time & money wise it would be.

Its not the livery fee's or anything like that, if i had a horse i could saddle up & ride, it would be fine, and i wouldnt mind paying out, but £120 a month and doing a 25 mile round trip to poo pick a field is very disheartening

So what do i do? Should i perserver?? Or should i call her owner, explain everything and ask her to take her back??

The way i feel right now is to put her on the lorry and give up

 

[kateknights]

Oh dear, you poor thing, is there no one at your yard that could help you? Although it does sound by the desperation in your voice that you have totally had enough... Maybe you are right to phone the owner and get her to take her back! Or yet again on the other hand maybe you are just having an off day, (we all have them)!
Why not see if you can get help first and take it from there.
Sorry, I am not that much help really, but I just wanted you to know that someone is here for you if you need to chat...
Take Care and keep us up dated.
Kate x.

 

[Christmas_Kate]

Poppey, I'm just about to embark on the same thing. I have a 3yo ariving tomorrow morning! All you need is imagination.
I have a bridle, a french link loose ring snaffle, two lunge reins and a lunge whip. YO taught me how to lunge and break and she doesnt use anything more than basics, and alot of her ponies are performance ponies which go on to have fab careers.
Get hold of a lightweight saddle (you can buy them on ebay).
You don't need a lunge cavesson or a roller particularly, though if you can it helps.
Is your mare quiet? I'm presuming you know how to lunge? the basic principle is for the horse to learn to move fowards and see you as the leader, ie not turning in towards you, you always go to her if you want to change rein, and learning to listen to your voice. Get yourself a good book about lungeing and long reining. Always wear a hat and gloves as there could be flying hooves!
I will pm you re this....

edited to say I would pm you but it won't let me!!

 

[JAK]

Is she on long-term loan then & would you feel differently about it if you actually owned her? Will she still be yours to play with once she's actually broken etc.?

 

[Puppy]

I really don't mean to sound harsh, so please don't take this the wrong way, but I am totally gobsmacked that you didn't realise this before you took her on loan!!

Did it not occure to you that an unbroken 4 year old would require great quantities of time/money/tack?? Without also considering if you had the inclination to do it, which you're now saying you lack!!

If thats the way you feel after only a matter of weeks then "yes, I think you ought to send her back again" - before winter so that the owner has time to make other arranagements- cause if this is how you feel now, it'll be ten times worse in winter!!

 

[LauraBR]

To be honest, if I were you I would send her back.

There are plenty of nice horses out there available for loan that you can ride and have some fun on.

 

[Rachel_M]

Forgive me if this has been answered but if the pony is on loan will the owners not contribute to tack, etc?

 

[hayliana]

oh my god, im sorry but this is just idiotic!

 

[flyingfeet]

Send her back to her owners - doesn't sound like you want to do the training or indeed have the resources

Please don't give this mare a bad start due to pride.

 

[RunToEarth]

Send it back, cut your losses and look for something within your budget to keep...

 

[Weezy]

OK from where I am sitting I would say you are getting absolutely zero satisfaction or enjoyment out of your mare and therefore I would send her back - like CotswoldSJ said unless you can give her the best of start of life then let her go and really have a think about what you CAN fit into your life and what you REALLY want to do equine wise x

 

[blakey]

Thats just it, i am getting no enjoyment out of her, its not that i dont want to put the effort in, i really really want to do this, but i am just getting no fun out of it, and if its not fun, whats the point?

 

[JM7]

send her back......

just stick to the letter of your loan agreement..and return her within the correct time...

and take a deep breath.....................

 

[the watcher]

Little unfair Poppey...you have been offered whatever you need in terms of tack, rugs and help..you only have to ask. And you have had the offer on a ride on another horse at the yard when you want.

The important thing, though, is that when training a young horse, consistency is the key, you can't pick them up and put them down like an older horse and when you start training, you have to be prepared to build on that every day. In your shoes I would be looking to get on with schooling that horse and then turning her away for a couple of months over the winter, and then really building on the training in spring. Even training from the ground can be satisfying to start.

If you really don't want to do that, then she should go back, or maybe you can help the owners find another loan home close to you that you can keep an eye on, she is a nice type and potentially will make a good competition horse, but something has to start with her NOW.

Don't make excuses..everything is there for you, the only question is whether you want to do it.

 

[blakey]

Oh i know that you have offered sue, and i really am very gratefull to you, and i am happy to accept your help, you have been a life line to me!!
I just am not enjoying doing a 25 miles round trip to spend 25 mins getting her in from the field, then 15 mins lunging, poo picking and going home.
I am sitting here crying now, and i just want to give up horses and never see one again, Please dont take it against you sue, you have no idea how gratefull i am too you xx

 

[the watcher]

tried to pm you..will email instead

 

[burtie]

Hi Poppey,

I've read this a couple of times and tried to think about what to say.

I think you really need to send this horse back, as you say hindsight is a wonderful thing, so no point commenting on wether you should have taken her on in the first place.
You have now put your hand up and admitted you are not enjoying it. A youngster needs lot of time, money and consistent work. It will also need the help of experts at times and you would normally need to pay for this.

There must be something older and easier you can get on loan and enjoy. Perhaps a native pony that can live out so less work, normally cheap to keep as they live on thin air and they can be a lot of fun.

Or perhaps look to part share, you'll need to take what is available but it won't be a 7 day a week commitment and can work well for both parties.


Hope that helps,

 

[Puppy]

Out of interest Poppey, have you broken a horse before?

Only you sound as though you might have been a bit unaware of what a job it is until faced with it?!

 

[Kelly1982]

I think you should send her back if your not enjoying her and dont have the time.

Youngsters need consistancey in their education and if your not able to give this then it is going to take twice as long to acheive what you want.

I would also worry about taking a youngster on as a loan, who is to say that after all your hard work the owner is not going to want to take the horse back??

If it was your own it would be slightly different!!

I think you should give her back and find something that is older so you can start having some fun.

 

[horsegirl]

If it is a loan then the owners should provide tack etc but I don't understand why they have given her to you to break in when you clearly have no experience of this?

 

[lordflynn]

[ QUOTE ]



Its not the livery fee's or anything like that, if i had a horse i could saddle up & ride, it would be fine, and i wouldnt mind paying out, but £120 a month and doing a 25 mile round trip to poo pick a field is very disheartening

[/ QUOTE ]

what happens if you get a horse that you arent able to then ride due to an injury then?
Send her back and maybe get a share in a horse-that way you spread the cost and the responsibility.