Stupidest things YOU'VE said or done?

Shantara

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So, we've had a thread about novice/non-horsey people and we've recently had one about experienced people...but what about you? :P

I honestly can't think of much for myself right now...but I know there is a lot, I'm sure!

I do remember once leaving a gate open and two groups of horses who shouldn't have mixed got in with each other! Eek!
Thankfully there was no harm done and I have never EVER EVER left a gate open since!

I also had no idea what a Standardbred was until I met Ned!
 
Put OR boots on a horse's hind feet once. Got a few yards away, something was niggling me......turned round, saw what I'd done and raced back to put it right before anyone noticed. Very embarrassing!
 
I spent a good month putting a Be Nice Halter on like a bridle until I realised it undid at the side, Ted puts up with alot of crap from me the poor boy haha
 
-Took a rug off pony in field without putting headcollar on (as I often did) but this time she spooked and took off. Rug ended up round her neck and made her immobile which was why I was able to get to her and get it undone. (I always use a headcollar on all horses now).
-I regularly take other pony into barn and leave her wandering untied or as on hack, leave her standing while tightening another riders girth. (Pony is fab although I take her moods into consideration each time. Can tell when she's in one of her, "oh, you want me to stay here? Tough" moods).
-Just the other day I was tightening my girth, walking down a hill towards a jump and foolishly thought same pony above would actually walk around the jump. Nah, we jumped it!

I do do different things with my horses as I know how one will react is not how the other one will so generally while some things are foolish, there is a degree of thought to it. With regards to saying, I don't interfere with others unless they ask me so can't think of anything stupid that I've said.
 
Closed a (heavy) gate from horse BEFORE checking my girth. Thankfully horse was a saint - I swear he sighed as he watched me slide to the ground!
 
Attempted to walk "previously" bolshy 2 year old pony to his new yard a mile away... in a headcollar.
Pony bolted... so did I.

There were a lot of tears and sweat that day!
 
Closed a (heavy) gate from horse BEFORE checking my girth. Thankfully horse was a saint - I swear he sighed as he watched me slide to the ground!

Oh I'm always not doing up my girth and realising at inappropriate moments. The worst one (well the most entertaining) was in a horseball training session... Picking up did not end well...

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On a similar note to not doing your girth up, I crossed my reins and didn't realise until I was on and moving! Wondering why normally responsive pony was now throwing a strop! Thankfully he had a short enough neck to correct them while still on board :P
 
- Forgot to tie my horse to the trailer (thought I had) at a show and wandered off to the car to get my show gear on. Thankfully when I returned she was still there, snoozing away!
- I once locked my keys in the boot of my jeep at a dressage show one day, and had to wait two hours for my OH to come with the spare set. The tack was in the car so I had to withdraw after travelling all the way out!
 
When I worked at my friends yard some years ago I turned out one of the liveries horses out with her stable quilt on, to be fair the owner used to come down before work and would change the horse into her turnout that particular day she didn't ! and with it being early in the morning I just didn't notice, my friend and I went to fetch them in and that's when we noticed we just could not stop laughing because the livery was possibly the biggest moaner we had on the yard, we still used to laugh about it years after.
 
Oh I've done way too many stupid things..

- after strip cleaning my bridle, I've placed the bit back 'back to front' (even though the arrow on the left side is there to help - it's always got to point forward and be on the left, and I made it point backwards on the right side). Luckily had a dressage lesson booked in shortly thereafter and my clever instructor spotted it very quickly.
- already mentioned on a previous thread that I left the stable door and chain fully open, then went to do loads of haynets and prepare feeds, was gone from the stable for a good 5 minutes. Luckily my horse was still inside his stable upon my return.
- buying an ancient Bedford TK 6.5 ton petrol (!) lorry from ebay without doing a test drive (!) and without having it checked over by an independent mechanic first. Paid loads to have various problems fixed but new problems constantly cropped up. In the end I cut my losses and sold it as a non-runner for £250, if I remember correctly. Such a shame because it had a lot of character and the horse area was perfect. It had easily operable rear and side ramps, covered in rubber matting everywhere and (on the rare occasions that it was running and my horse was sound) he travelled beautifully in it.

Can't think of any more at the moment but I'm sure there are plenty more examples like that.
 
At least once every few months I take off a rug without undoing the leg straps. Always get a funny look from the horse :p

I never know what to really call Alfa a, chaff, alfalfa etc, so usually say a combination of all the words in a right mess :p
 
Got horses all set to travel, jumped in lorry, arrived at racecourse, no horses ! Not a one. Everyone thought everyone else had loaded up, total brainfreeze that day, or hungover (very possible) good job the track was only 20 minutes from home.
 
This was years ago, like I was probably around 10ish, I was putting a cover on this gelding, and it was getting dark, so when I reached underneath him to grab the surcingles I grabbed something that was most definitely NOT the strap... Sorry Mr Horse!
 
Got horses all set to travel, jumped in lorry, arrived at racecourse, no horses ! Not a one. Everyone thought everyone else had loaded up, total brainfreeze that day, or hungover (very possible) good job the track was only 20 minutes from home.

That is very funny!
 
At least once every few months I take off a rug without undoing the leg straps. Always get a funny look from the horse :p
^This. I've been doing this increasingly frequently lately as well!

Putting horse in and just not shutting the stable door and then going home.

A couple of weeks ago I went to a training clinic with a very well respected instructor and some (I thought) relatively posh other riders. Horse is a fidget so I'd put her bridle on before we left but it took 15 minutes of riding to realise what the clanging was as id put the reins back on with the martingale rein stops on the wrong side of the rings and so they were clanging against her bit...looked like a complete beginner having to go into the middle of the school and ask him to sort it for me.
 
I went into a very posh lesson (one off for me) but completely forgot to put the loop of her martingale over the girth. Thank God for my YO who stopped me just before I went into the school with the others. I pretended she was bad on stones and that I was checking her feet. Also once when hungover/extremely tired, a livery turned up whilst I was looking after the yard and asked where her horse was, without thinking I said she's either in or out. Thinking this would narrow it down for her. She repeatedly asked and I just kept saying that. Eventually I realised I put her horse on the walker.
 
Bringing the fuzzies in, had got v slack about 4 years ago & let them pop themselves into stables.
On this 1 day Tiny Fuzzy decided to potter off down the yard, no harm done I thought - till I realised i had stupidly left the yard gate open!
Cue TF going out the gate and (luckily for me!) turning right to go on up the lane.
A jogger coming down the lane towards the main (very busy!) road was bellowed at to stand in middle of lane with arms out, TF was so startled she stopped and I managed to grab her and frog march her back to yard. It was only about 200yds, but could have ended up so much worse...

Like Enfys, have left once, only the once, without a fuzzy on the box (took 4 instead of the 5). Only thing was it was a 3 hour trip to a major championship show in the mid 80's. Poor pony was stood in stable in travelling gear for another 2 hours before good friend came in to turn out the rest of them.
Luckily, she made a couple of calls on the landlines (only the housebrick mobile then in those days) and another friend diverted 30 odd miles, and collected this lead rein pony & we all met up later in the day, thank goodness her class wasn't till the next day.
I have NEVER been not reminded about it since :redface3:
 
Far too many to remember but including getting on one side and falling straight off the other - more than once - and doing the splits when the leg strap of my long riding coat snagged on the saddle as I got off to open a gate. I've also done that thing when your hand slips off the girth strap when you're doing it up and smacks you in the face, usually resulting in a split lip...
 
I got back on my 17.3hh three weeks after she had throw me and damaged both my legs to the point they could barely hold me up. After about 20 minutes I realised I had no clue how I was going to get off and was struck by the idea the muck heap was a nice soft landing so duly manoeuvred her to the side of it and threw myself off. Unfortunately my legs weren't strong enough to get up so I sat there covered in ***** holding onto a very confused horse until the other liveries had stop laughing enough to help me.
 
I have set off on a hack with one of the children's pony's reins crossed, such that left rein pulls right hand bit ring and vice-versa. Very confused pony, who by the time I'd worked out why child was riding so badly, had decided to ignore the bit and was neck reining fairly well - clearly he was more with it than me that day..
 
Forgot my boots when going to get horse in from field on wet and windy day. So I put carrier bags over my shoes. Couldn't understand why I couldn't get near my horse who was always good to catch ☺️😳
 
I had a week off in Aug last year, booked for mare's return from Horsepital & 1st week of box rest, my Bro, single dad of 3 under 5, asked if they could come for a holiday, Yes I thought I can do this! But obviously didn't...when I got a call from the yard to say my Mares stable was flooded, I'd filled up her water bucket from the automatic water feeder (she liked a bucket) and forgotten to switch it off and gone home, she was on wood pellets & it was like a beach, weighed like a beach too..£60 on the muck heap, Brand new BIG bed that had been in her stable 1 day, thank fully every one literally mucked in to muck it out, but what a mess & did I feel a fool.

How I got through that week I will never know..Never mind dropping the huge lasagne half in, half out the oven..how far can melted cheese go?

Oh & done the, will just take rug off in field, cantered off mid straps, luckily she's cantered out of it, no harm..but for that 30 secs, every scenario goes thru your head, mainly "Bl**dy hell, hope no one is watching, think woman, its a wonder this horse survives, phew its okay" LOL
 
Arrived at serious business meeting after long early drive dressed in the flourescent pink stripey pj's I'd driven in, forgot to take my suit.
 
I knew this pony had a tendency to barge out of his box and make a break for freedom, but his headcollar had gone walkabout and I figured I was just slipping in so there wouldn't be space for him to escape.

Cue him shoving straight past me, and trotting up the road to his field, saddle on but no headcollar or bridle.

Nobody else around, and I was too panicked to look for a spare headcollar, so he was led back to the yard with a combination of stirrup leather around his neck and a firm grip of his forelock.
 
Got the horses in the other day, had two of them so let go of the trustworthy one on the yard, threw the rope over his neck and let him wander into his stable (tea was there so he was going nowhere) sorted the thug out, which took a while as he was being particularly thuggish that day.

Then realised I was late and had to rush home, shutting the open stable door as I ran past. Woke up at 3am with that horrible moment of realisation that poor M still had his headcollar on and his leadrope over his neck. Rushed to the yard in my PJs to find him flat out with the rope still over his neck. Luckily he'd lain down with the rope on the top side so it had stayed put.
 
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