Sweet Itch & The Archers (just for fun)

[Cloball]

Realistic horse noises:
Farting loudly as you lead them out of the stable.
Kicking the door as you prepare breakfast (“oi, shuttup”)
Squeeling mare as you lead her boyfriend past
“Gaah, gettoff, that’s my foooot”
Much muttering of “where’s my bleedin’ hoofpick”
…sound of running water “did you have to, Ive only just mucked out”

My horse is a total weirdo and actually neighs. Shes quite chatty. Ive never met a horse that neighs like they do on TV before.

I was standing on the opposite side of the hedge once and two walkers came up I said hello, walkers said hello, horse neighs hello from behind the hedge, walkers look confused I say hello D.

I found most of what Paul got up to at work general unprofessional

 

[little_critter]

My horse is a total weirdo and actually neighs. Shes quite chatty. Ive never met a horse that neighs like they do on TV before.

I was standing on the opposite side of the hedge once and two walkers came up I said hello, walkers said hello, horse neighs hello from behind the hedge, walkers look confused I say hello D.

I found most of what Paul got up to at work general unprofessional

I will admit mine neigh (demand) at me too.
When mine used to have breakfast before being turned out T had a specific ‘Ive finished breakfast now turn me OUT’ neigh

 

[Caol Ila]

I am not an Archers listener, but they get horses wrong in about 99.99999% of media.

Most of the horse scenes in 'All Creatures Great and Small' have me teetering between staring at the television, utterly baffled, and giggling like a maniac. It's usually one or the other.

My personal favourite, out of all of them, is the episode where Sigfried diagnosed a horse with PTSD (after it had been rearing and bucking people off), and then he did exactly what I'd expect of any vet. He jumped on the horse bareback, shot out of the arena gate, and galloped over the Yorkshire Moors. Why not? I am sure Gamebird and all of the other equine vets have done this exact same thing. Nothing says, lets gallop over the moorland like a horse standing straight up on its hindlegs in an arena.

 

[Petalpoos]

And…on horsey memes like the endless neighing - what is it about riders getting on horses and setting straight off at a gallop from the yard, often taking in a gate or wall or 2.

Is all that careful warming up we do all a waste of time ?

 

[Caol Ila]

I was amused by the Doctor Who episode where humans on foot were being chased by er...cheetah-people on horseback (don't ask...it was doing Doctor Who things), and the film horses were very well-educated, collecting the canter to the point where it looked like the guys on foot actually had a chance of outrunning them. As anyone who has ever tried to catch a reluctant horse knows, a horse doing a normal canter or gallop will be a lot faster than you.

Then this Fifth Doctor episode had this chap:

Ride and drive cob gelding. Bombproof. Literally. Can be driven by novices, including green reptilian aliens with megalomaniac tendencies. Not spooked by explosions, collapsing buildings, gunshots, or materialising/dematerialising TARDISes. Stands for vet, farrier, and Time Lords. Perfect horse for a mother-daughter share, novice carriage drivers, or anyone worried about extraterrestrial invasions.

 

[Exasperated]

I was amused by the Doctor Who episode where humans on foot were being chased by er...cheetah-people on horseback (don't ask...it was doing Doctor Who things), and the film horses were very well-educated, collecting the canter to the point where it looked like the guys on foot actually had a chance of outrunning them. As anyone who has ever tried to catch a reluctant horse knows, a horse doing a normal canter or gallop will be a lot faster than you.

Then this Fifth Doctor episode had this chap:

Ride and drive cob gelding. Bombproof. Literally. Can be driven by novices, including green reptilian aliens with megalomaniac tendencies. Not spooked by explosions, collapsing buildings, gunshots, or materialising/dematerialising TARDISes. Stands for vet, farrier, and Time Lords. Perfect horse for a mother-daughter share, novice carriage drivers, or anyone worried about extraterrestrial invasions.


View attachment 173793

absolutely brilliant - I’ll take two of those, thank you!

 

[Mari]

Those who listen to the Archers may well have been cringeing at last night's episode, where Alice - supposedly a very experienced horsewoman - calls in the vet because the mare she is riding seems 'a little irritable'.
The vet suggests sweet itch. Alice says 'isn't it a bit early'? but is told that it does happen in March. Apparently the horse has been rubbing and has bare patches.
Vet suggests medicated shampoo, which he is only too happy to sell to her, and a lotion such as benzyl benzoate. Alice says 'would a sweet itch rug help?' Vet says yes.
The possibility of the 'irritability' being something other than sweet itch isn't even raised.


Who is advising the scriptwriters on this stuff? Given that Alice had heard of sweet itch, did she really need to pay a vet to diagnose it? All she needed to do was a H&H forum search to get the very latest info!

So, a few questions...

- Has anyone on here got horses with sweet itch just yet? I know it's different up here in Scotland, but today it's 6 degrees, torrential rain/hail and gale force winds. Even if it got really warm tomorrow (which it won't), it'd take a while for midges to hatch and get geared up for attack. When I lived in Lancs and had a sweet itch pony he never had any signs until at least April, but perhaps some of you are seeing midges already. I used to get Finn rugged up and Z-itch applied in late March if it was warm enough just to be ahead of the game, but we often got frost/snow in March so no midges.

- Would any experienced horseperson really call a vet out to confirm sweet itch if all the symptoms are there (assuming that the horse is known as a sweet itch sufferer)?
- Does anyone buy medicated horse shampoo from the vet ("I'll add it to your bill" - yes, I'm sure you will...)
- Would an experienced horseperson not be a bit more clued up about treatments and rugs?

And finally...
- Does anyone still use the term 'loose box' - last night's episode was the first time I'd heard that phrase in about 20 years.

I have to remember, though, that this same person called a vet out just to confirm that a pony she'd bought for her daughter was overweight.
('I think he might be a bit overweight...' 'Yeah, he's fat. That'll be £100 please.')

What’s wrong with loose box? I have 3 horses, they all have a loose box.

 

[rabatsa]

A place that I worked at had both stalls and loose boxes. They were all called stables. The day horses were put in the stalls and the full time/overnighters were in the loose boxes.

 

[littleshetland]

I’m still recovering from an Archers episode from a few years ago now…..
“You can tell he’s such a good rider…..look at the way he grips with his heels..” said the character with glowing admiration.
I almost had to ring the BBC to complain.

 

[Clodagh]

My husband’s father died very young so he and his brother took over the farm. His mother, of the generation and class that meant you did not help in any way, was an avid Archers fan.
She used to phone him and say ‘why aren’t you spraying/drilling/ploughing whatever. He’d say it was blowing a gale/pouring with rain/midwinter, whichever was appropriate. She’d always reply ‘well you are wrong, they are doing it in the Archers’.
I supposed she had started listening to it when it was an advisory programme.

 

[Nancykitt]

What’s wrong with loose box? I have 3 horses, they all have a loose box.

Nothing's wrong with it, it's just that it's a term I've not heard for a very long time. When we were in Lancs our horses had 'loose boxes' but neither I nor anyone else ever referred to them as anything but 'stables'.

A place that I worked at had both stalls and loose boxes. They were all called stables. The day horses were put in the stalls and the full time/overnighters were in the loose boxes.

This took me way back to my days at the riding school where lots of horses were lined up in stalls. It seemed very common in those days.
I fear that some were in there for much longer than they should have been...