Talented young horse makes me question my riding ability - anyone else felt like this

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Dukey

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Ok, so I have a lovely 6 year old who I brought as a good all rounder and hopefully like my old boy I could enjoy Novice Level BE, a few BSJAs in the winter. Nothing amazing, but fun. However, his jumping ability is amazing, he jumps very naturally and huge! Many instructors have commented and I have turned down offers to buy him for triple the £ I brought him.
He is still green in areas and we are working hard to improve the bits between the fences, as that's where he struggles. But yesterday he was jumping very well and easily jumping 1.10m still made the odd baby mistake but he was wonderful.
This is my problem... Am I good enough for him? His bold jump can make me nervous, my instructor couldn't get over how well he jumps but I feel really deflated. I worry I can't ride him and that he deserves better.
Also that my amateur mistakes will damage his natural ability..?
Has anyone else felt like this? Or am I just being stupid?
Thank you for reading!
 
I think lots of people feel like this, I wouldnt beat yourself up about it, your not a pro, you do this for fun!! Yes you may have a very talented horse, but if you were jumping BE Novice with previous horse I dont think your going to be a muppe,t and I would think horse being a green 6yr old will make mistakes and you will help him learn along the way. Enjoy him and stop stressing!!!!
 
I felt the same way with my boy. Especially as a lot of the people at my old riding club said that my horse was far to good for me. I stuck with him. Ok we never did very well at all. All my fault I know, But I have a fantastic relationship with my horse. He is happy, I am happy, who can take that away from you?
 
Yes totally - currently having major swings of opinion in my mind from 'I can do this and it will be fantastic' to 'he's too good/too much (in terms of movement/bounce) horse for me and I should sell him to someone who can do it with him'. I can't offer any advice, but it's nice to know I'm not alone. x
 
I'm glad I'm not the only one! I know I such have fun and enjoy him but I do worry about making mistakes and limiting his natural jump. When he's very bold he flicks tail and back legs right up, it can be strange to sit to but so many instructors say it's marvellous but I don't particularly like riding it! Its like taking off on a jet plane!
 
I feel your pain, I feel similar. I bought a then 5 year old who was very green and still growing....he's now a big strapping 6 year old and I feel like my lack of ability has hampered his progress somewhat. He was jumping 1m spreads beautifully at the weekend, but I feel like I don't really want to go much higher....whereas he could very easily. And his flatwork should probably be progressing faster than it is, but because I'm not disciplined enough, we're drifting along a bit.
I suppose at the end of the day, he's fed and watered and happy and doesn't care that he hasn't affiliated yet - just don't want to waste a talented horse.
 
I sometimes feel the same about my horse when I'm having a down day. I'm 5ft and he is 16.1 and rides like 17hh! I bought him as a very green 5yr old who had only jumped maximum Discovery (1m). I've had him 2yrs now and he has just recently moved up to Foxhunter (1.20m). He is amazing and I have acheived things with him I never dreamed I would, he isn't easy, in any shape or form. He's spooky on legs, concentrates on everything other than the job in hand and needs VERY strong leg but also someone strong enough to hold him together....which technically isn't me! But with the right tack to help me, I have produced him myself, I know how you feel when you say about him throwing a big jump, mine does sometimes and has jumped people clean out the saddle! It can be un nerving. But as I have known him so long and brought him up from the bottom we know each other inside out. Other people struggle to ride him, I just get it in to my head that I am also holding back his talent, maybe he would be doing better and have gone further with a bigger, stronger rider? But then I give my head a wobble and snap back to reality that I have a horse that loves his job, he is happy with what he is doing and is still progressing. If he had gone to someone else he might have been rushed on and completely jacked it by now? Who knows. But all I know is I am happy he has given me confidence I would have never had if it weren't for him, and I feel he loves his midget mammy :p
 
Ah OP don't beat yourself up! Most of us have at some stage though we aren't doing our horses enough justice... once your horse is happy & you are happy that is all that matters - you are already competing at a high level! Water off a ducks back if people make comments to you !
 
Basically yes!

I think alot of people do get this feeling at times. If your anything like me, you will give the horse some shooking strides at times but then I do this whether it's a green baby or experienced! :D

If you feel completley overhorsed and you are scaring yourself and the horse then yes I'd say re-evaluate, as you won't be doing either of you any good. BUT (and as I suspect) your just excited about him and want him to do well, then you just have to learn to enjoy it, and remember mistakes are there to be learnt from!

Best of luck

(ps he sounds lovely!)
 
Dukey said:
I'm glad I'm not the only one! I know I such have fun and enjoy him but I do worry about making mistakes and limiting his natural jump. When he's very bold he flicks tail and back legs right up, it can be strange to sit to but so many instructors say it's marvellous but I don't particularly like riding it! Its like taking off on a jet plane!
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If you enjoy riding him & can offer him a nice life don't worry. Horses don't have career ambitions. We have a homebred 10yo who, at the age of 6 was technically far too good to have been a 1st horse for my then 12yo daughter. However, she was all we had & I didn't want to sell her. 4 year's later, they're just starting British Novice & planning to start low key eventing. I'm sure our mare could have done more with a more experienced rider. However, she's happy & enjoys her work so I really don't care. It isn't as if we have any intention of selling her.
 
Yep, I feel the same with my rising 6 yr old. Incredible jump but also a very difficult horse to ride when jumping so after having several very nasty falls I put it on the back burner for 6 months - I'm sure another better rider would have carried on and got good results and I'm just starting to take him back out and about (this Sunday will be a Clear round) but I just concentrate on the good points, his flatwork is super, he hacks out great even if spooky on his own and he doesn't care if he's jumping 1.20 or 20cm!
 
Like others have said a lot of us feel like this. I bought Emil as a green potential RC all rounder. He showed a very green and uninspiring jump. However no his flat work has improved his jumping is now showing real talent. Again like your lad he really picks up behind and too me a very inexperienced jumper it is very scary. So much so ATM only my instructor jumps him
I hope one day soon to be doing some smaller jumps instead of just x poles.
Then today he showed me what is important to him. I let someone else ride him and boy was he unhappy. Ears flickering jumping his back in walk. I walked round with them and talked to him and he settled. In trot he was tense and as he came past me he knickered to me. Due to my ill health I don't want a horse that only one person can ride, so I gave the girl some tips and he settled again and did some reasonable work. However despite the fact this person is competing at a much higher level than me she couldn't ride my
Lad as well as I do :). It made me realise our relationship is far more important to both my horse and I :)
 
I still feel like this with mine! After him developing a dirty stop due to another rider overfacing him (when I was having surgery!) I lost my confidence jumping. He's got a huge, natural jump, loads of scope and is super careful. But he hasn't jumped at a show for nearly 2 years now, and I'm miles behind where I was 2 years ago too...

Feel like I need to get cracking really but that I'm not good enough to get back to it without screwing him up :(

So OP you're definitely not alone!
 
I wouldn't worry too much about it OP. I had a dreadful round arena eventing at the weekend to the point that I am seriously questioning my riding ability! Its a new horse who was jumped by a professional in the past but is rusty - I just cant seem to work him out, last time out we popped round a 1.10m no problem but arena eventing round 90cm and it was just horrible! I rode like a total idiot, yet the horse clearly has a massive jump in him. Im not competing him again until I get some training. I've never had this before, its strange as Ive always had my horses from youngsters and I've never come across any problems - I guess because we adapt to each other. But trying to ride a ready-made horse is difficult for me!
 
I would think that 99% of horses do not fufill their full potential with their riders. I also think most of us feel that we don't do our horses justice, I have felt the same as you with my horse.

However I then think that actually I only live once. To me, my life is my most important thing in the world and what an honour for my horse to be the one that shares it with me.

How can any horse expect more than finding someone who worships them, loves them and thinks they are amazing and who looks after them and trains them with thought and consideration. So what you make mistakes, everyone does. You won't ruin him, if you were going to ruin him you would not be the sort of person posting on here because you care so much that you don't want to ruin your horse ;). He'll cope, he IS coping fine with your riding.

If your horse gives you pleasure and you enjoy taking off like a jet plane over the fence then why would you be a mytr and give that up? So he may never go to Badders or the Olympics with you but that probably would not happen anyway.

Most probably he would go to someone else to be underused or even worse over faced and taken advantage of. He may be ridden by someone who pushes him too hard and injures him. Or he could escape his field tomorrow and get run over by a bus, then what would you have achieved.

My point is, he is not being wasted when he gives you such a fantastic feeling and pleasure. Sod everyone else who could enjoy him. One precious life you have so stop worrying and enjoy YOUR amazing horse doing what YOU want to do or are able to do :).
 
I had the opportunity for a really good rider to ride my horse once. Poor horse looked so scared and frightened as they rode him. I said then that I would never put him through that again. Ok my regular instructor occasionally rides him, he seems ok with that, even if he is always looking out for me. I know I will never be a Charlotte Dujadin, but then again, would I want to be? My horse's happiness means the world to me and I will do all I can to make him happy
 
Your horse doesn't know he is super talented, he's just being himself. I would just think myself extremely lucky to own him. Take him to whatever level your happy doing and just enjoy.:)
 
I wouldn't worry about his talent, as already said horses don't care about more than a nice life.

However you say you don't like jumping him, so for that reason I'd consider whether he is the horse for you.
 
Thanks for the replies, it's good to know that I'm not alone! My major worry is not wasting the talent but damaging it in some way! I saw a friend jump him over some BE Novice XC fences last summer, he really enjoyed it but I didn't question my ability then. But with him going so well I want to enjoy it but sometimes he does scare me with his over boldness. I hoped it would be a baby thing but his shire has a big jump so I guess I need to relax and enjoy it :) x
 
Arh....I know the feeling well!!

It may be that he did something that frightened you a little and you worry about your ability to cope with this.

Basically I think it creeps in when we're experiencing something new and we don't have a frame of reference for it. So, we then 'invent' senarios that try to imagine these new experiences we're going to face in the future. And, if you're a negative rather than positive person it's easy to go down a path where you see yourself lying on a hospital stretcher after having broken ALL your bones falling off. Well, I do sometimes - maybe that's just me???

But that's just what is it - imagination. Even if he did something to worry you or has a bigger jump than your old horse, this doesn't mean you can't cope with it.

Imagine in your head, jumping a track and that each and every one placed you into orbit - and that you not only sucessfully stayed on but also won. Or, it could be anything that you think of as being sucessful.

Experience is a great teacher. Of course, I may have it competely off the mark but I do wish you all the best.
 
Thanks Tonks that is probably it. I sit well to his jump and we have been working on sitting on my bum more as I do have a tendency to get a little ahead of the movement. I had a few near misses so I'm probably worrying myself! X
 
If you can ride him competently, you feel safe doing so, and your life allows him to be kept in a way that suits him, I don't think his having 'extra' ability is an issue in itself. After all, very few horses work at anything near the margins of their innate ability.

That said, if a rider/horse/both is struggling then I think their is sense in realistically assessing the situation. I have counselled people in the past with horses that really did not fit their needs/skills/lifestyle and in some cases suggested a change. I don't think their is any shame in that

It doesn't sound like the latter scenario for you and your horse, OP, so it's all good. But, equally, if there is someone out there genuinely feeling their horse is putting them at risk or spoiling their enjoyment, don't let people guilt you into keeping a horse you know would be better off elsewhere. Every situation is different.
 
I bought a very talented 5 year old from a reputable professional 12 years ago - everybody who taught me on her told me that she had potential to be top class (SJ) and some tried to buy her for lots more than I paid.. I felt like i had won the lottery and hung on to her because somehow I had this dream that I would compete her myself at a high level. In reality her talent and scope was actually a disadvantage in terms of my own progression as she was so careful that all my 'misses' at big fences etc scared her and I simply wasn't a good enough rider to do her justice. I learned a lot on her but only ever competed her up to 1.05 and chances are I would have done a lot more with a lesser horse that was less sensitive to my nerves/mistakes - I still have her (retired now) and never regret it but I could have sold her for a lot of money and bought a horse much more suited to my competence with a lot of money leftover..

I think it's a personal choice and obviously the horse doesn't care either way but top class horses tend to be those that are bit sensitive, they have to be in order to be ultra careful, and that makes them easy to scare and less forgiving of a lesser rider.
 
I feel like this all the time totally inadequate to ride him. He's a lovely 6yo I have to get back up to the level he was previously working at and I keep thinking everyday how much better he'd be with a better rider. He would be out competing elem easily if it wasn't for me. I even registered bd with him but haven't taken him out yet as I'm so worried that people will be horrible. When you get told everyday how crap you are eventually it sinks in, sometimes I just wanna bury my head in the sand and get away from the bitchy horse world.
 
But no horse can ever really be better than his rider, so if i was you I'd just enjoy my horse and be proud of what you've got. I doubt if horses lie awake at night fretting that their rider isn't doing them justice, or denying them that red rosette.
 
You are not being stupid, as I think a lot of people feel this way now and again.

I did with Zeb, and after a couple of weeks feeling down about my ability I shook myself off and learnt to ride him better with lessons and just pushing us both out hacking and on the xc course, etc. In the end he did a lot for my confidence and ability as I ended up riding him quite well and I felt proud of myself :D Apologies for the gloat, but I have never felt this way in 15 years of riding! I think it also helped when I didn't wind myself up about it and concentrated on learning but having fun, too. At the end of the day that's all that matters.,

So you can see why I was so gutted when he was sold!! :(
 
Cortez said:
But no horse can ever really be better than his rider, so if i was you I'd just enjoy my horse and be proud of what you've got. I doubt if horses lie awake at night fretting that their rider isn't doing them justice, or denying them that red rosette.
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Haha I'm sure he doesn't. Food tends to be his main concern in life :D no-one has negatively commented on my riding, the opposite actually. We brought him for £2k and over the last 20 months have worked our socks off with him. Yes, my worry is I'll scare him, he'll scare me and we'll be detrimental to each other. My old boy served me well he was a safe ISH sort never had huge talent but a big heart and got me home safely. This one is talented, very exuberant, sensitive in some areas and cocky in others. I'm just not such we match well... all in all only time will tell! We plan to start BE90 this season and see how we get on...
 
Dukey said:
Thanks Tonks that is probably it. I sit well to his jump and we have been working on sitting on my bum more as I do have a tendency to get a little ahead of the movement. I had a few near misses so I'm probably worrying myself! X
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And, these are all things that can be worked on. Yes, you may have to learn new skills to bring him to his full potential but think of it as a challenge, new experience and an opportunity for him to teach you. Try not to imagine that you can't cope with what he throws at you.

I think you have to re-programme your thinking patterns in a way that transforms this from 'I can't do it' to 'this is a learning curve and a chance to learn new things'. Yes, you may get a little nervous at times, but nerves are beneficial [in small proportions] as they motivate us to adapt and change.

Remember he is also learning as well and horses adapt to their riders also - that's what developing a partnership is all about. X
 
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I am 13 i have a 15.3 warmblood mare who has jumped 1.20 and is very talented. At first i thought i was rubbish but now i am jumping 1m. I am sure you are brilliant!
 
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