The Bad Dog thread

Spudlet

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I think we need a new thread here to share bad dog stories... remembering Barney made me remember all the great stories we got from him! I think we need a thread to share these stories
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Maybe we can even ask for it to be sticky-fied if we have a good supply....

So I'll start:

Today Henry the dog burglar struck again..... my poor colleague had got a bit of banana cake to go with her afternoon coffee, which she had in a paperbag, on what she thought was a high enough windowsill. I got in from giving Henry his lunchtime walk, and didn't realise it was there, let him off the lead and went to share a bit of hot gossip with my other colleague (Cake Lady had made a schoolgirl error by going to the loo). Next thing you know, there was a rustling noise.... Henry had eaten the cake, bag and all
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So he was put on his lead tied to my desk, and I ran off back to the coffee shop to buy a new bit of cake
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Came back to find Henry sitting next to Cake Lady looking smug - she had come in, thought I had been very mean putting him on his lead and then noticed all the crumbs next to her desk. And assumed that she had made them herself and let him off the lead to finish them off!

What a wicked and recalcitrant spaniel I have
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My normally well behaved lab disappeared over the brow of the hill today after absolutely feck all!

My OH had to leap the fence (she went through the stream!) and then chase after her for ages. But she'd grabbed an apple, so wouldnt come anywhere near my OH becuase we always take the apples off her! OH not impressed!

Great idea Han, lets have it stickied

xxxx
 
The delightful Daisy, was not impressed having to sit on the back seat of the car whilst i got out to open the gate, she got out of her harness and seatbelt and jumped on the front seat and managed to push the central locking button! She locked me out of the car and it was cold i had no coat no phone nothing! Daisy thought it was a great game whilst i tried to coax her to stand on the button, in the end i had to put a brick through the window! Had to pay for a new one!!

Or

I left her in the car (no i never learn!)whilst i rugged the horses up and turned them out, she got her harness off and chewed through the wires under my seat, when i got back in the car i had a warning light on, i couldnt work out why so rang the garage and had to take the car in.... she had chewed through all the wireing for the airbag system!! Hmmm another £200 out of pocket!!
 
i had a black and tan called Smartie, who chewed my brand new Charles Owen beagler beyond recovery, and also chewed off my gearstick and both window-winders on my first car.

the boxer dog i had as a child, Mandy, was the biggest thief on the planet. nothing was safe, unless it was on top of the kitchen cupboards (as in, just below the ceiling) or locked away. she also bounced up and down in that unique boxer way, and stripped all the fruit off the fruit trees in the garden (pretty impressive, in retrospect, now that is a TRUE PIG of a dog), it took us ages to work out why we never got any fruit. she also broke into an upstairs bedroom one easter and scoffed about 20 easter eggs, including foil, boxes, etc, the lot. she wasn't very well for a while, served her right.

now i have jrts and they're not big into chewing or stealing, fortunately. bits of the garden do look like The Somme though...

Keltic, i'm cracking up at the image of you trying to persuade Daisy to stand on the button and let you back in...!
 
My old dog was expert at stealing sandwiches....from your hand!!!!

And of course, my Mum's dog devouring a Steiff teddy bear ranks pretty highly.

The only one I can remember from recent times is me trying to get the Asbo twins out of their runs at the same time when they were about a year old, both slipped leads and started running after the cats - who at the time were charming an extended Italian family of six who had just booked in for the weekend and were milling about the yard.
Cats ran into accommodation, so did dogs, up and down stairs, through kitchen, bathrooms etc.
Was all a bit Tom and Jerry, I finally caught both of them, and luckily, the Italians liked dogs.....
 
I could go on for ever, think I have had some very bad dogs
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One I do remember is walking round a game fair with one of my dogs years ago. We passed a small child eating an ice cream, and seconds later child was having screaming fit. I think everyone thought the nasty dog had attacked her, but what in fact she had done was very neatly removed the ice cream from the cone, without even breaking her stride . I was actually quite impressed
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Luckily the mother saw the funny side of it and the child soon cheered up with a new ice cream, and actually made friends with Pepper (before the new ice cream or that would probably have gone the same way).
 
Our lab and Irish Setter were also vvvv bad!!
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I helped mum unload and unpack the shopping one day. Mum was searching high and low for the weeks meat she had bought from the butchers. The two of them had knicked it and run up the garden and whilst we were unpackng had devoured a whole chicken, sausages, bacon, mince etc etc meat for a family of 4 gone in a couple of minutes
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- all that was left was shredded plastic bags.......
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The setter also worked out how to open the fridge which they would then empty. To stop it we bought a child lock but she worked out how to open that too - so we ended up tying the door up. She would flick it with her paw when passing just to check.....
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Daisy (JRT x Springer) used to go through all the Christmas presents under the tree, find the ones containing chocolate, pile em up and guard them from everyone else - never opening them cos that's for people with fingers to do, just no other dogs allowed.
She'd also go very carefully through the tin of Roses / Quality Street / whatever taking out the ones she liked and bring them to you to be unwrapped.
Christmas isn't the same without her
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Thata reminds me of our little Lancashire Heeler, she used to open any presents under the tree that contained chocolates, and also remove the chocolate decorations off the tree at Heeler height (which admittedly wasn't very high
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). We had to keep her out of the room during the Christmas period.
 
to this day i never even think of putting chocolate ornaments on the tree, Mandy (boxer dog from hell) taught me this one too... a childhood with her trained me for life! (yes, she had the lot one year, and trashed the tree to get them all.)
 
I bought my Dad one of those chocolate champagne bottles for Father's Day once. Had it iced with a special message and everything... My dog is usually really good and won't nick anything, but on this occassion she devoured the whole thing! Carefully unwrapped all the little champagne truffles and ate them too
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One of my collies, whe he was younger, used to go in the dirty washing bin and remove all of my dirty knickers.

One time, I had a guy round trying to get me to swap my gas supply and Mika very proudly climbed onto the settee and sat next to him with a pair of my dirty knickers hanging from his mouth!
 
We went away for the weekend when pip was about 2. OH had just finished lambing and was very tired and in need of a break. We arrived and walked down to the local for tea and a drink. I remember sitting outside next to this lovely lake, children playing on the park next to us....took a sip of my wine and said to OH, "look at all the ducks flying" He turned to look and saw about 20 ducks take off, very closely followed by pip, who then launched herself into the lake to follow them, took us about 20minutes of trying to catch her! She had chewed right through her lead and was gone before we noticed. I don't think I have ever laughed so much or seen OH so angry as he carried wet, dirty pond weed dog back to the B&B (minus a lead) and had to beg the landlady to let him bath her. She still comes on holiday now, much better behaved these days though.
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Reminds me of when we moved into our current house a couple of years ago.. Old lady neighbour popped round to say hello and our dog offered her a present - my Mam's lacy thong
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Needless to say we don't see much of that old lady anymore!
 
I have to fully share the little old lady story....

Barney was a really quite large labrador, and in his young days his favourite trick was to run between your legs and stand there, between your knees, having a nice rib rub and back scratch. We are a fairly tall family so this was a fun game for everyone.

One day he was being walked and we met a VERY small elderly lady, who had a very elderly lab with her. She really was very very small indeed.... and she liked Barney a lot.

Barney was so pleased to make a new friend that he decided to play his favourite game and run between her legs. Unfortunately, as I may have mentioned she really was very, very small indeed..... so this resulted in her riding away on Barney's back!
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Fortunately she rolled off after a few strides and landed on a nice soft heather patch
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Even more fortunately as a labrador woman she was not in the least bit perturbed
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My mother on the other hand, has never fully recovered
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My old dog once managed to lock me out of my car.....with her still inside it!
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I had run in the house, leaving dog in the car, and keys in ignition.
Chaos had jumped up to look out the window and promptly landed on the door lock and locked me out.
AA man had to smash the window to get her out, and me in to retrieve my keys
 
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