The Spirit of King Kevin Kat has just hopped through the galley window . . .

[Ratface]

As above. I was standing by the above-mentioned window, making a mug of strong tea, when The Shade of King Kevin Kat jumped through.
I think that maybe I have conjured him up as I have been thinking dark/murderous thoughts about the horrendously-inept manner of his passing and the complete lack of response to my detailed, factual report on the veterinary hospital's Google site request to "Please tell us how we did" on the many-faceted mess that the clinician made of his euthanasia.
The Shade of King Kevin Kat didn't stay long, didn't even look at Chubby Cat or her food (no demands for "Fooood!! Nooow!!!") - he just swooped in - and de-materialised.

 

[Highmileagecob]

Take it as a reassurance that he is still around and he's ok. Kevin sounds as if his life was full of escapades before he met you, and by all accounts, he had the life of Riley with you. He knows that you did your best, and you can't change things beyond your control. Plus the vet had probably not dealt with such a determined cat before!
How is Cuddly Cat doing? Do you think Kevin is showing up to escort her around and show her the ropes?

 

[Fjord]

He's checking in to make sure you are OK.

 

[Ratface]

The trouble is - I'm not OK. I cry at least once a day over the clinical botch that was his death.
I've discussed it with Carrie Cat, who say that I can continue using her long, fluffy tail to wipe my eyes, but she requires at least two more treats a day. Done.
Thoughtless creature has now gone into her personal sandpit/aka litter tray, and caused a veritable Daytona Beach over a metre wide.
Oh well.

 

[Ratface]

Re: Kevin Kat showing CC the ropes. CC is a devious Madam Chubby Cat beneath that charm 'n' smarm exterior. She's an avid follower of the Duchess of Sussex and is learning how to obtain "What (CC) Wants, (CC) Gets!"
I really must confiscate her mobile phone after third supper time - currently 2300hrs.

 

[MereChristmas]

As above. I was standing by the above-mentioned window, making a mug of strong tea, when The Shade of King Kevin Kat jumped through.
I think that maybe I have conjured him up as I have been thinking dark/murderous thoughts about the horrendously-inept manner of his passing and the complete lack of response to my detailed, factual report on the veterinary hospital's Google site request to "Please tell us how we did" on the many-faceted mess that the clinician made of his euthanasia.
The Shade of King Kevin Kat didn't stay long, didn't even look at Chubby Cat or her food (no demands for "Fooood!! Nooow!!!") - he just swooped in - and de-materialised.

Our red setter would peep round the kitchen door and run to the back door to ask to go outside. We were never able to teach her to squeak as all our other dogs did.
She also would walk into the lounge and count who was there. You could see her head move from one person to another. When satisfied she would wander back to her bed.

She ‘appeared ‘ to me twice after she was PTS.
The first time I was cooking and I called out Yes, I’m coming as I was sure she’d looked round the door.
The second time I thought she had come to count us again.

I have had other of my animals ‘appear’ or ‘speak’ to me in my head not long after they were PTS.
( It sounds crazy when written down!)
I am sure KKK is just checking all is as he thinks it should be.

 

[Spotherisk]

I am glad he came back, maybe to remind you he is actually okay and his mortal passing is of no relevance to him.

I heard Harley neigh last week, it was only a few hours after he had passed, there are no other horses near us and it was very clear - I was mucking out his stable. It comforted me, and I hope KKK can do that for you too.

 

[Horseysheepy]

Agree with others, just checking in on you, making sure you're ok.

All of my horses have 'made an appearance ' in some way or another, usually 1-2 days after being put to sleep. It's a little alarming at the time, but also very reassuring. Even though people think I'm bonkers, there's no denying it wasn't them!

 

[Lurfy]

KKK passing was a very traumatic experience, so sorry it continues to hurt you. Take care xxx

 

[Ratface]

KKK passing was a very traumatic experience, so sorry it continues to hurt you. Take care xxx

Thank you for your understanding.
I appreciate it.

 

[m1stify]

I also had a traumatic pts experience with my cat 7 years ago ( not quite as traumatic as yours but he really faught them putting the line in his paw) and I was listening to his screams before they let me in to hold him when he was pts (they had sedated him then). So it left me with loads of questions ie was he really ready to go. I couldn’t go back to that vets for years even though I don’t blame them. They renovated the practice so I am able to go back now. It stll upsets me to think about so many years later so I can imagine how fresh it is in your mind. Can you write a letter to the vet explaining? You may get some closure. I know you wrote a review via email but perhaps no one has even read that.

 

[Ratface]

I had an unpleasant experience with YO yesterday. I was helping her stuff haynets. She has arthritis and lives with constant pain, so that may have contributed to her (to me) unkind response.
I said that I was still feeling very sad about the loss of Kevin Kat and upset about the (to me) traumatic experience.
She said " Oh, for goodness sake - get over it! It was two months ago - being miserable won't bring him back! Go and get another haynet. Make yourself useful". So I did.
When her beloved little dog died, I got her a condolences card, flowers and a bottle of her favourite spirits. She never thanked me, but the spirits went down quite quickly!
I'll know now to keep my my shut about any feelings of loss or sadness as far as she's concerned.

 

[Highmileagecob]

He was part of your family, the guardian of the boat, and you loved him. Never mind what other people think, you miss him and are right to grieve for him. I am an ex veterinary nurse, and have known this happen to a few pets. They usually had poor circulation issues, and possibly pain. We assumed that as the injection was not absorbed quickly, there must have been a moment when all pain subsided and a sort of euphoria kicked in, before the anaesthesia took hold and did it's job. I can fully understand how distressing it would appear, but I don't think Kevin would have really known much about it. He was a fighter to the end wasn't he?

 

[pinkfluffy]

@Ratface I'm sorry its been so traumatic. David Kessler's "Finding Meaning" is a great book about grief. On animal loss particularly he writes "If the love is real, the grief is real" which I found very helpful when struggling with losing my own cat.
My three cats have also made their presence known from Cat Heaven (the only afterlife I'm going to)
PM if you ever need to talk, I'm always here.

 

[SEL]

I had an unpleasant experience with YO yesterday. I was helping her stuff haynets. She has arthritis and lives with constant pain, so that may have contributed to her (to me) unkind response.
I said that I was still feeling very sad about the loss of Kevin Kat and upset about the (to me) traumatic experience.
She said " Oh, for goodness sake - get over it! It was two months ago - being miserable won't bring him back! Go and get another haynet. Make yourself useful". So I did.
When her beloved little dog died, I got her a condolences card, flowers and a bottle of her favourite spirits. She never thanked me, but the spirits went down quite quickly!
I'll know now to keep my my shut about any feelings of loss or sadness as far as she's concerned.

There's a few people I know with that kind of "crack on" attitude - and they are usually the ones who don't crack on when it's their own pets they've lost too.

I know my mum still feels awful about the cat PTS during COVID when she couldn't be with him. First time she hasn't had a cat in the house for 40 years and I don't think that's helped either

 

[Ratface]

Thank you, kind people.
YO's behaviour has really set me back. I don't think that I will go up to see Old Horse tomorrow.
I've been crying a lot because I feel ill (M E) and because I'm getting fed up of YO snapping at me all the time. I do my best to be a good livery, paying for livery by SO, paying for his balancer the minute she tells me he's going to need it soon, the farrier ditto. I bring biscuits, tea bags, wine, gin, milk, flowers, carrots, every time I go. I skip out the stables, groom all the horses because she never does, poo pick if any of the darlings make contributions whilst they are coming in.
Yesterday, I took Old Horse's lead rope from YO when she was bringing him into the courtyard - she yelled "Don't step on the grass". Anyone would think it was Centre Court at Wimbledon! She strims it every fortnight, and there's a narrow concrete path round the edge , leading to my horse's stable and that of his girlfriend next door.
All of that, together with her abrupt criticism of my sadness re the late King Kevin Kat's death has made me feel that I really need to take a few days break.
I have dumped the paper rubbish from the yard in our "paper/cardboard only" bins, duly hidden in a large black bin bag, as she requested. I sent a text to confirm this. She didn't respond. Mmm.
Am I Being Unreasonable??

 

[nagblagger]

You are not the one being unreasonable - the YO is. I think having a break from her, for a few days, will do you good, you know your horse is being looked after.
She has been very insensitive and bossy from what i've read about her. I bet many people would love to have a horse owner like you on their livery yard.
It is not your fault...so try and relax, read and meet CCs demands.

 

[Ratface]

I've discussed the above matter with Chubby Carrie Cat. She's with you, Nb. She says that she could do with being closely supervised all week, if I don't mind!
She's anxious that she might run out of Very Expensive Wet Food, fresh drinking water, Very Expensive Dry Food, daily morning grooming services being provided, fresh litter every week At Least, cheese Dreamies every morning, free range of the boat, attention to every squeak, in case she needs something/anything/nothing now - but I might, in five minutes . . .
The list goes on.

 

[Spotherisk]

I am so sorry for how you’re feeling, and also how your YO seems unable to respond kindly. CCC seems a very worthy friend at this time.

 

[Kunoichi73]

Just offering my sympathies to you. You're definitely not being unreasonable. YO is and is also being unkind. You're entitled to feel sad about KKK whenever you want. I still have moments when I really miss all my various animals that have gone. There is nothing wrong with being sad about losing an animal friend.

 

[Ratface]

Thanks very much for the kind and understanding responses.
I've decided not to go to see Mr. Horse today.
I'll send a brief note telling her that I won't be down, giving no reasons, and confirm that I will see her on Sunday, all being well.
I think, also, that I'm going to cut down on the polite conversation for a while. YO makes it perfectly clear that she has lots of friends and is in great demand for going out and about to dinner parties, outings, works does. Good for her. My idea of hard work, but each to their own.
I might also cut down on the human treats as well. She never thanks me for them, or even acknowledges the fact that they exist. She's quite good at eating them, though.
I've discussed the above with Madam Carrie Cat, who agrees with my every word. She's suggested that I save the money not spent on goodies for the yard on little treats for her. In her opinion, she needs building up . . .

 

[Spotherisk]

Ratface, I think that’s all a very good idea. Factor in some nice food for you too.

 

[Ratface]

Spotherisk, thank you. Not a great fan of eating. However, I might have a forage round at the local garage for some fruit, bread and cheese. I have to give a small tithe of cheese to That Cat. She prefers Wensleydale. Yes, Ma'am. Coming up now, Ma'am.

 

[Rumtytum]

Empathy is a wonderful word and patently something your YO lacks, perhaps caused in some part by her arthritis, she wouldn’t be the first to vocalise pain through rude comments. That’s enough of empathising with her! Whatever the cause it doesn’t make her right in any way to criticise you and to be cruel and hurtful. I’m pleased you are going to follow MCC’s advice, far more useful than the YO’s

 

[Ratface]

Empathy is a wonderful word and patently something your YO lacks, perhaps caused in some part by her arthritis, she wouldn’t be the first to vocalise pain through rude comments. That’s enough of empathising with her! Whatever the cause it doesn’t make her right in any way to criticise you and to be cruel and hurtful. I’m pleased you are going to follow MCC’s advice, far more useful than the YO’s

The thing is, I live with arthritis 24/7, 365/365! I never mention it to anyone, take aspirin and just keep going. When I was 21, I had a crashing fall from a youngster who reared when a wasp stung her neck. She fell backwards on me. I broke my pelvis, but still managed to crawl (literally) about the higgeldy-piggeldy cottage I lived in, cook four-course meals for the demanding husband, excercise the mad Afghan Hound who, eventually learned how to be a Retriever and actually drop the ball at my feet, and generally got on as best I could.
I sent YO a text message early Tuesday morning to say that I wouldn't be down later in the day, as feeling unwell. She'd read it but sent no response.
Ah well. Where it ain't, you can't find it.

 

[Katieg123]

I sent YO a text message early Tuesday morning to say that I wouldn't be down later in the day, as feeling unwell. She'd read it but sent no response.
Ah well. Where it ain't, you can't find it.

I love a good passive aggressive message in these scenarios. 'Just wanted to check my phone is working properly as I have not been receiving responses from you when I message?'

Hope you feel better! In my expert opinion cheese and bread is the best medicine for blue days xx

 

[meggymoo]

@Ratface what a nasty piece of work she sounds. As far as I am aware there is no time limit on grief and it can rear its head totally unexpectedly and out of the blue. Two months is certainly no time at all. I’m so sorry that your original post about KKK somehow passed me by at the time. He will never be forgotten. Take time to come to terms (especially with how the terrible circumstances unfolded) and look after yourself.

 

[Spotherisk]

Spotherisk, thank you. Not a great fan of eating. However, I might have a forage round at the local garage for some fruit, bread and cheese. I have to give a small tithe of cheese to That Cat. She prefers Wensleydale. Yes, Ma'am. Coming up now, Ma'am.

I know you’re not - that’s why I mentioned it. Wensleydale is an excellent choice, good cat!