They say everything happens for a reason..

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Equi

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But i fail to see what the reason is! I have often thought the universe is literally giving me a big massive flashing lights sign saying YOU CAN'T RIDE and after 5 times of being proven right, i'm maybe going to have to listen.

Once again the horse i ride is being sold on, so there is no horse for me at the school (they only have young tbs and small cobs left and at 5'9 i need something bigger) so i'm back to not riding.

Im fed up.
 
equi said:
But i fail to see what the reason is! I have often thought the universe is literally giving me a big massive flashing lights sign saying YOU CAN'T RIDE and after 5 times of being proven right, i'm maybe going to have to listen.

Once again the horse i ride is being sold on, so there is no horse for me at the school (they only have young tbs and small cobs left and at 5'9 i need something bigger) so i'm back to not riding.

Im fed up.
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Find a new school?
I'm surprised any reasonably sized school only has one horse capable of suiting a 5ft9 rider? That isn't even that tall.
 
Where are you? Agree that there must be another school around that has a suitable horse. Or are you experienced enough for a share or part loan, so you have a bit more stability?
 
Its not the horses its the rider. I'm too nervous for most horses. Not a lot of schools near me at the mo as a lot have closed down, im also a bigger lady and a lot won't take me. The logical solution is loose weight, but ive been the same size despite 10 years of dieting so suffice to say its not quite happening.
 
sounds like a rubbish school if they have no options for a 5' 9 rider. id imagine thats the most average size a person could be?!
 
maybe the universe is telling you its time to move onto bigger and better things like a new school or find a part loan? coming into winter people are always crying out for extra help so im sure you would easily find someone who wants chores done in return for rides
 
They have bigger horses, i just don't want to ride them. I would not be comfortable on the tbs, i need a half dead type. I know thats breed specific, but just how i am. Takes me a long time to get to the point of getting on a new horse even a big lazy plod. Was at a good place, now i will be back at square one.
 
equi said:
They have bigger horses, i just don't want to ride them. I would not be comfortable on the tbs, i need a half dead type. I know thats breed specific, but just how i am. Takes me a long time to get to the point of getting on a new horse even a big lazy plod. Was at a good place, now i will be back at square one.
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Are you sure it's not YOU stopping yourself from riding, rather than the universe?

If it is you, that's totally ok. You just need to work out if riding is something you really want and if it is, go somewhere that have lots of confidence givers and sympathetic teachers.

Depending on your weight (and if you even want to lose it!), maybe seek out a trainer at the gym to help you on the right path? Losing weight isn't all about dieting.
 
I want to ride on a horse I'm comfortable with. I've got to that point with two horses then they've been sold. I've been doing circuit training, spin and riding every week along with diet and it doesn't come off.

A friend actually went to the doc and has found out she allergic to tomatoes and wheat (I eat spaghetti bol and the like) and since she stopped them she's lost like two stone.
 
While I totally get where you're coming from regarding riding horses you feel safe on, I'm not sure that's how you build confidence long term.

Riding a variety of horses and ponies and discovering that you can do it and do it well is a huge confidence boost. Sometimes you do need to push yourself slightly out of your comfort zone to move forwards. :)
 
Yes I totally agree but I only started in like march. It's a bit too fast for me, I'm just not ready to start on other horses properly. I have trekked out various others and had a little pootle in the arena on one of the smaller cobs but I couldn't ride him for an hour in a lesson, I wouldn't feel right.
 
equi said:
I want to ride on a horse I'm comfortable with. I've got to that point with two horses then they've been sold. I've been doing circuit training, spin and riding every week along with diet and it doesn't come off.

A friend actually went to the doc and has found out she allergic to tomatoes and wheat (I eat spaghetti bol and the like) and since she stopped them she's lost like two stone.
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So you know what do - go to the doctor and find out what you are allergic to. When I read that you have been tryng to lose weight fo r10 yrs to no avail, I thought "allergies". I can't eat wheat, oats, rice, potatoes/tomatoes, soya, maize, dairy, refined sugar, caffeine, so please don't guess what your problem is but you might be able to give the doc a clue/starting point by thinking of which foods you would hate to give up, because it is probably those that affect you.
 
Well as they say in tennis circles, the ball's in your court! Either pick up your racquet and wang it back or stick it in your pocket and slink off home. (no, they don't actually but it makes a point) Riding, like life, is about rising to a challenge when it's presented to you. You are not the only person to lack confidence but you can choose to try a new horse or you can give up and blame the riding school for selling your fav horse. You are not the only person who needs to lose a bit of weight, you can give it a real go and lose a few kilo, give yourself more options of horses to ride, improve your health and just feel a hell of a lot better about yourself or you can sit on a couch and eat crisps. You could find another riding school and ride a real plod for the rest of your life. Your life, your choice but don't blame the universe for dealing you a bad hand when you are capable of changing things yourself. I'm sorry if this sounds harsh but riding, like life, can be a bit scary but if you are prepared to be brave, it can be bloody brilliant!
 
Pearlsasinger said:
So you know what do - go to the doctor and find out what you are allergic to. When I read that you have been tryng to lose weight fo r10 yrs to no avail, I thought "allergies". I can't eat wheat, oats, rice, potatoes/tomatoes, soya, maize, dairy, refined sugar, caffeine, so please don't guess what your problem is but you might be able to give the doc a clue/starting point by thinking of which foods you would hate to give up, because it is probably those that affect you.
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I think I will :)
 
I do love this forum sometimes. Thanks everyone.


Another yardie has decided that she wants to buy her but won't have the time to put into her full time. Guess what MIGHT be happening if she does buy her.....


(I think I posted this woe is me one too soon)
 
oldie48 said:
Well as they say in tennis circles, the ball's in your court! Either pick up your racquet and wang it back or stick it in your pocket and slink off home. (no, they don't actually but it makes a point) Riding, like life, is about rising to a challenge when it's presented to you. You are not the only person to lack confidence but you can choose to try a new horse or you can give up and blame the riding school for selling your fav horse. You are not the only person who needs to lose a bit of weight, you can give it a real go and lose a few kilo, give yourself more options of horses to ride, improve your health and just feel a hell of a lot better about yourself or you can sit on a couch and eat crisps. You could find another riding school and ride a real plod for the rest of your life. Your life, your choice but don't blame the universe for dealing you a bad hand when you are capable of changing things yourself. I'm sorry if this sounds harsh but riding, like life, can be a bit scary but if you are prepared to be brave, it can be bloody brilliant!
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^This, exactly this!! I teach at a fantastic riding school and unless there is a very specific reason or it's not long term, it is wildly infuriating when people request the same horses over and over, especially when it's the safest, easiest horse going that is needed for weeker riders, any RS worth its salt will have carefully planned workloads for each pony, these sort of things throw them right out of whack. ...and I don't mean to sound harsh but if you can only ride one horse, can you really 'ride' at all?
Have faith that any half decent RS will only match you with horses your capable of riding, believe it or not they don't want people to fall off and they don't want there horses upset by riders not right for them...
How do you expect to learn to really ride if you only ever ride one horse.
 
I've ridden this horse approx four times in my life. The one before it about five. It just takes me a few weeks to build up the guts to get on them and then another week or two to build up the guts to canter etc. my ability is not the issue it is my nerves.
 
There are solutions to nerves, the easiest being to sing your favourite song, either out loud or in your head, both work, you calm down, which in turn calms the horse, the other solution is rescue remedy, a few drops before scary stuff can help.
Re your weight, eat what you like, just reduce the portion size and limit biscuits, crisps etc, it's worked for my OH who has spent his life overweight
 
DD265 said:
The Centre of Horseback Combat does confidence courses:

http://www.horsebackcombat.co.uk/

If I was riding myself I'd be tempted. Might be worth a look?
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It's not near enough really but something similar might be good for me. I get far too attached to horses so while I'm thinking about this annoying rigmarole of getting my guts up to ride another horse I'm also breaking my heart over this one cause I love her. In another life (aka one where I had money) she would be my horse of a lifetime for sure :(
 
What about putting an ad up in your local tack shop? Completely agree with another poster RE bigger and better things are waiting for you :)

Completely changing the topic here, and apologies if this comes across as intrusive, but I read that you're trying to lose weight to no avail. I'm very in to my fitness/nutrition so if you ever wanted to drop me a PM regarding this, feel free.
 
Equi, apart from having a few lessons as a kid, I didn't start riding until I was in my late 40's and I bought my first horse for my 50th birthday. I'm now late 60's, not the best rider in the world, sometimes having confidence wobbles and occasionally having complete disasters but a couple of things I've learned is I've only progressed because I have stepped out of my comfort zone and it takes quite a long time to properly bond with a horse, 4 lessons is nothing, 4 months of ownership and riding daily, is still probably not long enough. I've had my latest horse for well over a year and I still have times when we do something new that my tongue is stuck to the roof of my mouth. But hey, I just think you only live once (and you can only die once too). Just get on with it!!!!
equi said:
It's not near enough really but something similar might be good for me. I get far too attached to horses so while I'm thinking about this annoying rigmarole of getting my guts up to ride another horse I'm also breaking my heart over this one cause I love her. In another life (aka one where I had money) she would be my horse of a lifetime for sure :(
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Yeah it is nothing, but i have ridden her on the beach (scary!!!!) and just felt so at ease with her. I volunteer at the yard too so i have spent a lot of time with her doing general things like grooming and bathing feeding etc. I'm not one who just turns up, i was tacking her her getting her sorted too. That is maybe where i fail, i bond with them when i should be just detached and riding!

I gave myself two years without a horse to get my issues sorted out, but this one horse is giving me real wobbles. Ive considered selling my car, getting a loan, stealing her (joke)

I will just get on with life and try and find another horse to ride (ive already had one offer of a horse similar, but it is 4 and rather more lively but never know it might work)
 
Where are you based equi? Someone on the forum may know someone who has a horse that suits you, or a riding school that would be suitable for you :)

I had a very bad fall 3/4 years ago, broke my wrist and was all for selling my horse and never getting back on. Confidence was completely wrecked. My instructor let me ride a big, friendly, lovely cob who I trusted. Most placid, easy going horse and without being able to ride him when I started back, I wouldn't have been riding quite so quickly again, and certainly wouldn't be back on my own horse. Confidence will definitely come once you find a horse you trust and you're happy with - maybe a part loan where you can get an instructor out instead of a riding school would suit you more?
 
sasquatch said:
Where are you based equi? Someone on the forum may know someone who has a horse that suits you, or a riding school that would be suitable for you :)

I had a very bad fall 3/4 years ago, broke my wrist and was all for selling my horse and never getting back on. Confidence was completely wrecked. My instructor let me ride a big, friendly, lovely cob who I trusted. Most placid, easy going horse and without being able to ride him when I started back, I wouldn't have been riding quite so quickly again, and certainly wouldn't be back on my own horse. Confidence will definitely come once you find a horse you trust and you're happy with - maybe a part loan where you can get an instructor out instead of a riding school would suit you more?
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Im in co.down.
 
equi said:
Im in co.down.
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I'm more antrim way, so wouldn't be familiar with the riding schools in Co. Down. I've heard a lot of good things about Gransha, and The Burn in Belfast, but haven't been myself so couldn't give you my opinion!
I was at one in Islandmagee/near Larne, but it may be a bit far for you.

I'll keep an eye out, I have a few friends with horses in Down so they may know a bit more than I do!

If you ever want to come and have a sit or even come and groom and plait and give a horse a bit of love, you're more than welcome to come down to see my boy!
 
sasquatch said:
I'm more antrim way, so wouldn't be familiar with the riding schools in Co. Down. I've heard a lot of good things about Gransha, and The Burn in Belfast, but haven't been myself so couldn't give you my opinion!
I was at one in Islandmagee/near Larne, but it may be a bit far for you.

I'll keep an eye out, I have a few friends with horses in Down so they may know a bit more than I do!

If you ever want to come and have a sit or even come and groom and plait and give a horse a bit of love, you're more than welcome to come down to see my boy!
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Gransha is a bit far but i have never really looked into them before. Thank you for that lovely offer, if i can't find anything a bit more permanent i might take you up on that.
 
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