thinking of selling on when you have a sharer

[weesophz]

ive been posting recently about how im needing something a bit more exciting in my life horse wise.

i love fox to bits but hes just too chill for me now. ive had him 7 years now and we've both learned a lot but between his being so accident prone and general laid back for his own good i feel like im ready to move on. i have a sharer for him though. ive been speaking to her about taking him but she has her parents to speak around and so far its not looking good. i dont know if i could take fox away from her when shes looked after him so well with me for the last 2 and a half years. i feel bad just thinking about it.

ive fallen in love with a youngster at my yard that my friend bought to bring on and sell on. hes a 4yo highland and he is such a little dude. he was unhandled 2 months ago but youd never know. my friend is letting me loan him just now but it breaks my heart to think he could go at any moment as i cant afford 2 horses. strangely a girl that mailed me last year about sharing fox mailed me this morning asking "is he still for sale?" obviously a misunderstanding but it makes me feel like this is all meant to be..

so bottom line i really dont know what to do. all of me says that moving on and getting something to work with is really what i want to do, but i honestly dont think i could or even should take fox away from my sharer when shes been so loyal to us both.

has anyone been in this predicament? its tearing me apart just now.

 

[MerrySherryRider]

Well, its lovely to have a good sharer, but the point of sharing is that there is no responsibility or unexpected costs. So, the downside is that the sharer has no control over the owner's decisions.
Your loyalty is to your current horse and ensuring his future is secure, not your sharer, even though she is very good.

 

[Leam_Carrie]

I've had it from the other side, with the horse I shared being sold - 3 times! I bought the horse the third time. I guess there's a couple of options I've been offered the horse on full loan or been given the chance to buy them. It is really difficult, but you need to get the right horse for you.

 

[weesophz]

thats tough LC, i would have given up if 3 had been taken away from me! i offered her full loan aswell but she cant afford him. shes also got her highers and everything next year so will be even harder for her to keep up her share days. i just feel so torn

 

[Roasted Chestnuts]

If you have a genuine nice person willing to buy him then sell him hun. If this person knows him then at least you know he will be treated fairly and be well looked after. You need to look at his and your own requirements before a sharers x

 

[Pippity]

At the end of the day, he's your horse and your sharer knows that.

I'm planning sharing next year (if I can find a suitable horse), and I certainly wouldn't expect the owner to keep a horse that wasn't right for them, just because it was right for me!

The one thing I would say is to give your sharer plenty of notice. The pony I shared when I was eight or so was sold, and the first I knew was when I showed up at the yard and the pony wasn't there! It'd also be a nice gesture to offer to be a reference if she finds another horse to share, or even ask around and see if anyone is looking for a sharer.

 

[weesophz]

If you have a genuine nice person willing to buy him then sell him hun. If this person knows him then at least you know he will be treated fairly and be well looked after. You need to look at his and your own requirements before a sharers x

ive not told anyone im looking to sell except my sharer and my friend whos youngster im after (and all you lot on here haha ). i feel like i need to find my sharer something else before i think of taking fox from her, eventhough thats not really my responsibility. the girl that messaged me wanted something to take to HOYS, hes definitely not and never will be hoys material with all his scars etc haha xx

 

[Pippity]

i feel like i need to find my sharer something else before i think of taking fox from her, eventhough thats not really my responsibility.

I really wouldn't do that. If you find her something that isn't what she wants, she might feel she has to take it just because you've gone to the trouble.

Also, if word gets back to her that you're trying to find her a new share, that's not going to be a nice way for her to find out about Fox possibly going.

 

[Capriole]

I think you should sell him if he's not right for you, I am sure your sharer will understand. Especially since she is possibly going to be cutting down her share days because of school. Will you keep her on as your sharer for your new horse? If so, maybe involve her and take her with you to look at new horses if you decide not to have the HiPo, so she doesn't feel dumped.

 

[weesophz]

I really wouldn't do that. If you find her something that isn't what she wants, she might feel she has to take it just because you've gone to the trouble.

Also, if word gets back to her that you're trying to find her a new share, that's not going to be a nice way for her to find out about Fox possibly going.

worded that wrong, i meant help her find something not just find her something to replace him. like i said she knows im thinking of selling thats why i offered him to her first.

I think you should sell him if he's not right for you, I am sure your sharer will understand. Especially since she is possibly going to be cutting down her share days because of school. Will you keep her on as your sharer for your new horse? If so, maybe involve her and take her with you to look at new horses if you decide not to have the HiPo, so she doesn't feel dumped.

i know i would just feel cruel taking him away. i dont think i would need to as my yard is now doing all year turnout which the wee highland could do easily so i would have the time to pop up and check him rather than doing a bed and haynets and stuff. the highlands really whats made me realise i want to move on, id been thinking about it but when i met him i knew i wanted him