Those of you who have 'given up'

Foxy girl

Foxy girl

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I am seriously thinking about hanging up my riding boots and taking a break from horses - if not giving up entirely. I have had incident after incident with a variety of horses and ponies and although I love my chap to bits, I tried to ride yesterday and got off in tears after 50 yards. I have totally lost my confidence and really think that this time it's irretrievable. I am 37 and have two young children - I just can't afford to be laid up or worse if things go wrong again.

I'm just wondering if those of you who have 'given up' regret your decision or have even failed to give up completely? Its a big decision to make and a heartbreaking one - I don't want to take it lightly...
 
I often find this time of year very hard and with my son this year especially tricky. Is there anyway you can turn your boy out on grass livery for a few months (even on a retirement livery type arrangement where someone checks on him for you) and give you both a break for a while. Then you don't have to make any 'final' decisions just yet and see how life is like without them. I've done this a couple of times and always have got my enthusiasm back after a break (and it never seems to do my boy any harm at all)
 
Hi there, if you find the idea of 'giving up' heartbreaking then why not take a break? You could put your horse out to grass over the winter and see how you feel when the sun shines next year x Or if it's the horse that is not the right one for you consider selling/loan. Very hard I know.It is meant to be an enjoyable hobby, if it's not then question 'why'? Can you fix the problems and move on or can you give yourself a break and return refreshed? I am the same age as you with two small children and a job. I rode a lot until my second was born but then struggled to find the time. Horsey is old and retired now but could be gently worked. However I made the right decision for me and my family AND my horse. His health is fab now whereas a year a go on full livery he was really struggling. I was constantly worried about him/my finances/my children and injuring myself as he is a forward going bundle of energy. I might return to riding but I don't miss it at all at the moment. Have a holiday, give yourself a break and think about what will make YOU happy xxx Good luck.
 
A break might be good for you! :) don't feel like it's giving up, or that you've been defeated in some way. Sometimes it's just time to say goodbye to something.

I've just come back after a 7-8 year break. Now I find that during that time I've changed as a person, my own personality and my goals with horses are completely different. Totally by chance I ended up meeting a horse who, even if he has his own problems, has clicked with me in a way I've never known with any other. Although my riding skills have seriously rusted in that time and there's little chance of me reaching my former level again I'm enjoying riding a hell of a lot more.
 
Thank you - good to hear some positive stories about taking a break. I just don't want to look back and regret selling my lad, but I also don't want him to waste away in a field when he's only just turned 7. I've also been put off by all the loan horror stories that you hear!

I think a break is no bad thing - time to concentrate on the children, my job oh and the husband ;-)

I have no doubt I'll be back to it again though - bloomin horses are like a drug!
x
 
I am feeling a bit like this at the moment, horse is lame with ddft injury and i am not confident that he will come right. I so have something else to ride but i seem to have lost my enthusiasm this week, i keep him about twenty minutes away so go once a day, i wonder if i would feel differently if he was closer but i love the yard and there are two other horses there i can ride and there is a lot of support and everything i need. I think it is the time of year, christmas stuff to do, more parties etc so i am just riding when i feel like it and looking after my boy and making sure he is happy and see how i feel in the new year. A few weeks off never hurt anyone and the weather has been diabolical its either freezing or raining or both, In hh the other week there was an article about a team chaser and she only roder her horse when team chasing and he lived out so they dont come to any harm not working and for some of them its good for them.
 
Can you find a field and chuck the horse out on grass livery for a bit? My sister has 2 of her 3 off totally for the next 4 weeks, because it helps her come back absolutely desperate to ride them again (she'll be like that after 2 days, to be fair!).

I have pretty much totally given up. My horse was PTS, I went to uni and I don't ride much anymore- I only do when I am at home and there's a horse going spare (very lucky as my ister works with horses, and I am allowed to ride one of the horses in her care). I thought giving up would be the end of the world. Only it's not- it's jut given me more time and less stress. 3 years in I miss riding again, and so that's why I'm slowly getting back into it...
 
It is horrible. I have suffered a broken wrist, broken back, fractured clavicle and now, to top it all, a pulmonary embolus linked to a clot caused by the fractured spine!!! I'm on warfarin, probably for life, so riding isn't an option. I hate it.
 
I think that something happens to a woman rider once she has given birth. Suddenly, being bucked off isn't the fun and challenge it used to be, you seem to have an inbuilt preservation, and sometimes, it can effect your riding...if you're really not enjoying it right now, then give up the riding, find someone else to exercise your horse, and just enjoy grooming him. Once you've taken the pressure off yourself, I'm sure you will feel better. If after 6 months to a year, you still don't want to ride him, then perhaps you should seriously consider selling him.
I had to give up riding my mare when her arthritis got too bad, and whilst many friends were offering me to ride their horses, somehow I couldn't, I felt I would be betraying my girl. Daft I know, but that's how I felt. It didn't stop me crying when I saw other people out on a hack, the frustration of them having fun and I couldn't even sit on my girl for fear of causing her pain.
Be honest with yourself and don't feel guilty, the answer will come to you...
 
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