Time after horses AGAIN

[pistolpete]

I’m so in turmoil. Lost my best boy a year ago and my highland went lame at Christmas so now is an unrideable field ornament I’ve had lessons I’ve ridden friends I’m currently trying a share horse. My hearts not in it. Problem is feel less confident and miss my old boy Pete still. He really was my rock. I am trying to keep going but feel like horsey fun is over for me. I’m 57 and never been the bravest rider. It all feels so challenging now. If I give up what on Earth can I do? I’m retired so really have no clue. Sorry if it sounds like a woe is me!

 

[Pearlsacarolsinger]

When you find the right horse, I'm sure you will get the love of horsey fun back.

 

[splashgirl45]

is there a RDA group near to you. helping there could give you your horsey fix without riding ....if that doesnt appeal, local dog rescue walking the dogs...get a dog and take up agility or obedience... there is no rule that says you have to ride, its a hobby that should be fun....57 is no age these days, i was riding and looking after my loan horse till i was 72 and only gave up because arthritis made looking after her really difficult in the winter..

 

[Highflinger]

Sorry to hear of your dilemma
Perhaps try some different disciplines - could you do in hand work with your Highland - I do inhand trec and various other in hand work with my older boy
Have you tried driving . It is really good fun . I took it up last year as a back up when I get too old to ride!

 

[pistolpete]

Sorry to hear of your dilemma
Perhaps try some different disciplines - could you do in hand work with your Highland - I do inhand trec and various other in hand work with my older boy
Have you tried driving . It is really good fun . I took it up last year as a back up when I get too old to ride!

He’s lame. So can’t do anything with him except admire his handsome face.

 

[Griffin]

Do you have to ride? I think as I have got older, I have decided I often enjoy caring for horses more than riding. I like riding but there is something about spending time with horses without pressure that I really like.

 

[I'm Dun]

Id be getting my head round the idea of having him PTS before winter and looking for a new horse. Sounds harsh but keeping one retired horse I could do nothing with would suck the joy out of it for me. I cant imagine its easy to keep a highlands weight under control if they are retired either.

 

[pistolpete]

It’s impossible! He’s having a lovely summer but he is DNR. If he gets poorly that’s it. For now he’s happy as Larry. I love seeing him chilled as he was always such a worrier. Don’t know what I’m going to do though. If he stays well I won’t kill him off.

 

[pistolpete]

Griffin. Maybe that is the answer. I don’t know.

 

[MuddyMonster]

Are lessons a possibility? Maybe keeping your hand in on a regular/semi regular basis whilst working on your confidence will keep you ticking over whilst you decide what you want to do?

 

[mini_b]

My friend is an RDA volunteer and looks after her old boy. She’s very much still horsey but doesn’t ride anymore.

If you could never ride again, how would you feel? Gutted or indifferent. That might help you make a decision x

 

[pistolpete]

MuddyMonster. I’ve been having lessons. Thoroughly enjoy them but it’s so expensive. Last jack was two hours for£95. Last lesson was 45 minutes £68.

 

[pistolpete]

Min_b
I think if could never ride again I would be gutted.

 

[mini_b]

Min_b
I think if could never ride again I would be gutted.

Keep up with the lessons and if it’s not enough, you know what to do. Big hugs - it’s tough feeling torn. They really do leave a hole x

 

[Spotherisk]

I’m in a similar position, lost mine 16 months ago and have retiree and his companion living out at home. I tried a loan but it didn’t work, not the mares fault at all.

I actually miss riding my retired boy, and I’m not sure I can find the right horse to fill his place. I am going to start riding again, a few lessons as I’ll be super rusty but then I’m going hacking, I want to enjoy my riding. OP perhaps it’s the type of riding your doing which isn’t filling you with joy?

 

[pistolpete]

Yep. I miss my old boy too and miss the fact that I don’t have my own to ride even though the highland was tricky he was mine v

 

[Skib]

You never get your favourite back . But why lose the skills and fitness you gained from that shared relationship? It is two years since I met the new 3rd hacking partner. She is my tonic and my obsession. All riders out live their horses. Choice is whether or not to go on being a rider.

 

[VRIN]

have a go at dog agility. They are a lovely crowd and so much in common with equestrianism

 

[pistolpete]

Ha ha I have tried it funnily enough. It’s really not my lurchers thing!

 

[pistolpete]

 

[pistolpete]

Thanks everyone. I have no idea where I am going with all this. Guess it’s going to come out in the wash thanks again.

 

[PSD]

I’m in the same boat at the minute.

Lost my horse of a lifetime last year, I have a 3 year old fell who I do love but I just don’t get the same feeling I used to. I miss riding and having fun, I don’t think I’ll ever find one to fill the hole but I also don’t think my fell is the one for me either. I’ve been toying with selling her for a while but I also don’t want to go through the stress of buying a ridden horse. I’m viewing one this weekend but I know I’ll compare to my Connie I lost.

It’s so tough, I really can’t offer advice but I do sympathise

 

[pistolpete]

It’s a big deal isn’t it? My Pete was a horse in a million.

 

[PSD]

It’s a big deal isn’t it? My Pete was a horse in a million.

What a handsome chap.

It’s so hard because you will always compare, well I know I will. I still haven’t got over it, don’t think I ever will. I don’t want to be without a horse but at the same time nothing even comes close!

 

[Spotherisk]

I’ve been casually window shopping for a horse for over a year and haven’t even seen one I’d want to try. All I want is gelding, over 15hh, sane sensible in all ways, happy hacker, to live out at home - and obv must be a lovely person to be around.

 

[Billyandme]

It's a difficult one. Just over a year ago I had a horrible accident with my horse. I was in Hospital with a badly smashed ankle and my horse was pts. Another horse at my age (65) on DIY was just not doable. I have been fortunate enough to find a lovely horse which I part loan 3 times a week. He's a bit like me - getting on a bit and a bit creaky but so far so good it's absolutely great. If I want to ride great, if not I just poo pick, have some horsey time on the yard and then toddle off home. I really feel so lucky to have been given this opportunity to love and spoil another horse.

 

[littleshetland]

I had to retire my beautiful boy, age 10, due to a serious injury. He's ok and I manage his pain levels with supplements and bute, but he really is not to be ridden, so Ive taken up liberty training with him which I had never done before. With the help of a lovely, knowledgable local lady and you tube, we have been perfecting our menu of tricks that he can do within his comfort zone. We're both enjoying it it immensely, and I've been surprised at how satisfying it is and how much he enjoys it. I also managed to get my hands on a new horse to ride about a year ago now...he is an absolute joy (see picture on left..). Ive just turned 60, so there's plenty of hope and plenty of time! Wishing you luck!

 

[canteron]

I find Autumn is the time I love riding, in the Summer there is so much more you can do (have you tried a ‘get into golf’ course for example?).
Maybe take the Summer off, save some £ up and in Autumn either book an intensive riding course at your Riding School or a short horsey holiday (il Paretaio is my choice) and see how that feels!!

 

[Trouper]

I do so sympathise with you. In my mid-70's I have to accept that it is now too late to own another and, like you, I find RS horses and costs prohibitive and unsatisfactory.

Your advantage is that you have years on me (!!) so try and turn the thinking around and work out what you still have to give to the horse world. While you are waiting for another special boy to come along, could you take a youngster from one of the charities who just needs some growing time and some basic handling lessons before going back to be broken for riding?? Giving a horse a good start could be a very satisfying occupation!!

 

[confusedmum]

Really feel for you lost mine 3 years ago and I’ve just had major spinal surgery and whilst I should be so very grateful for the fantastic surgeon and the amazing treatment I’ve had in the middle of Covid all I want to do is ride I’m 64 ! I’ve done it all my life don’t know or want to know anything else and miss all of it rain mud early mornings cold being poor !!! I imagine it’s easier coming off heroin than stopping horses I hope things work out for you !!!