Tips on beating nerves ... please

H

HBII

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Perferably with a big stick, with nails in
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... so we have been having a bash at this competing lark and getting out and about .. which has all been fine and dandy, apart from me
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I go from feeling really confident in my ability to a complete wreck in about 3 seconds
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and wanting to get off and pack up and go home
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BUT I am NOT going to let my nerves get the better of me
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So do you have anything that help you beat your nerves you might be willing to share? Any tips would be greatly appreciated
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on how to overcome that feeling of uselessness my nerves create. I am open to any random ideas ......

Thanks in advance.

Hb

[apologies for poor spelling
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I'm new to competing too - I have done about 6 competitions and with any new venue it feels like the first very scary time again
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What gets me through and helps me to 'get a grip' is taking each step at a time on the basis that I don't have to do it and can just stop and go home any time I truly want too. So I break it down into bits - tack up, mount and walk to the warm-up, go in a warm -up, go in and do my thing in the class! I took a decision that applies to all competitions that at any time I can just stop, load her up and go home. I can even do this in the middle of a test (dressage) if I want to. I'd just hold up my hand and retire - why? No-one business but mine! I find that this approach prevents nerves from taking over because every minute its all about choice
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If youv'e prepared really well and are ready for it, but find it difficult on the day the only thing to do is keep doing it. Don't let past mistakes/nerves affect today. Try flowers bachs remedy, or failing that a stiff brandy. lol.
I used to give the bachs flower remedy to both me and my boy.

Try to think of the competition as schooling away from home, not the be all and end all.

Jane
 
Oh yes, Jo Cooper. I have used her for other anxieties about riding after accidents and I highly recommend her www.jo-cooper.com

Alcohol, at competitions? Interstingly! Not sure I dare, I get tipsy very easily
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Give Jo Cooper a ring!

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I have tried TFT at the beginning of the year so it might be worth digging out my bit of paper with the instructions on. Thanks for reminding me
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Hb
 
Take a confident calm friend. Works wonders having someone to give you a boost and who you can be honest with. They can rationalise your fears and calm you down and get you thinking positively.
 
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Alcohol!
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But why doesnt it kill those butterflies? Maybe I am a bit light on the measurements!

Hb
 
I suffer from nerves when i compete and its just horrible. I think the trik is to find something that works for you, but on the whole, i have found that the more i do it, the better it gets.

I have tried rescue remedy, which wasn't great for me but has worked for others. I also have some magnesium based tablets called serenity... something or others... although i havent competed on them yet. Something else that worked for me was taking my trainer along. She is brilliant at keeping me calm and focused...i also have a friend that competes who has a similar effect on me, so she comes along hen she can. I find that being prepared helps, as when i rush around i get worked up.

With me it has helped just to get ut as much as possible, perhaps try Jo Cooper, although its a good sum to pay. If you do, let me know if she helped!

Otherwise, good luck and remember to breath!
 
My tips would be:

Bach rescue remedy
Only compete at a level you feel confident doing
Tell yourself that you're doing it cos you WANT to (I have an internal dialogue with myself & say, do you want to do it or not? If you do, let's get on with it; if you don't, let's go home)
If you can't eat beforehand, try a still sports drink
Sometimes I just say to myself, ffs, stop being so wet. For some reason, that actually does seem to work.

My breakthru moment was in a jumping lesson. I was getting wound up cos we were jumping out of my comfort zone, & I suddenly thought how insignificant the whole thing was. Ie all I'm doing is jumping my horse over a load of poles & it's not exactly going to change the course of history, so I might as well chill.

Also, don't feel useless. You're riding at a comp, which is a lot more than other people would dare to do. I bet that a lot of other people at the comp feel nervous too.

Good luck!
 
I agree with Lec, am so much better with someone to do the pony for me, so I can just sort myself out. I'd lend you BB's or Twigs but might be a bit far away! They're very used to my flapping now
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TFT helps me a bit. just, makes me much calmer.

Other than that, make it all as easy as possible. Pick a quiet venue, or ask to go first or last in class and just do one test
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I find that making sure you are running very late so that you arrive at venue 5 minutes before you are due to compete is the best cure for nerves, you then don't have time to get nervous
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On second thoughts, perhaps not!
Mental note to be more prepared next year!
 
Was that the book called 'Its not about the ribbons' or something like that?

That book gave me confidence outside of riding too. There is an article called ' The fleas are out'. Its excellent and really explains things in a way which will help your confidence in any area, not just the riding. I highly recommend it.
 
Thats the one and there is 'That Winning Feeling' which she wrote 1st (I think thats what its called - yellow cover). Agree its not just riding related but lots of good life stuff too!
 
Get a good trainer who can help instil confidence

Give yourself plenty of preperation time

Don't compete outside of your comfort zone

Breathe and live for the moment
 
That is good thinking, I was doing well at the start of my first test but then I hadnt planned the actual test too well so it went t*ts up. But yes you are right that method of thinking keeps me in control
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Good luck with your competing.

Hb
 
Hi Jane love the username
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I hadnt quite prepared the test ... at all ... or much
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I suppose riding the test at home might help next time.

Hb
 
Thanks lec

Ill try and get someone to read my test and keep me clam. Chumsmum are you listening .. you got to read my test next time
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Hb
 
Hi fee fee

Sorry to hear you suffer too! But also reassuring that other people have similar problems. Ill give the herbal calmers a wizz next time and drag out my old TFT stuff.

Im afriad my trainer is usually away comnpeting elsewhere so that isnt an option.

Hb
 
Thanks for taking the time to reply everyone
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catembi: you are right by psuhing the comfort zone you are bound to feel a little wibbley at times. It is something I really want to do, and my nerves aint gonna beat me .. so they can take a walk next time!

FinnMcCoul: I am aiming to go for a test where I have had a lesson so I will know the set up and arena so it will be a bit more familair. BBs is cool as a cucumber!

nosey: Thanks for the reference Ill have a search.

Ben_and_Jeryys: LMAO gosh that could either go very very right or very very wrong! Good luck with the new years resolution!

Merlotmonster: Thanks for the reference sounds a good read if it help your outside of riding too.

Nic01: Eh? But you go mad things like XCing?! I think I need a yum yum soaked in vodka
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. Hope you had a good Christmas.

irishdraught: Breath?!?! I know I shouldnt forget such a fundamental thing but it is suprising that you do! Like that is going to help
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damned body
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lol
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Hb
 
Yeah but i'm never sure why in the start box. I remember when I cross the finish line though. Nothing beats that feeling. I LOVE Yum Yums! Fab Christmas ta, you?
 
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That is good thinking, I was doing well at the start of my first test but then I hadnt planned the actual test too well so it went t*ts up. But yes you are right that method of thinking keeps me in control
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Good luck with your competing.

Hb

[/ QUOTE ]Bet it didn't go as tits-up as mine - in one of my firsts (I'd like to say it was the very first but it wasn't), I entered at C instead of A
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The more you get out and do it, the easier it becomes..... I used to be totally paranoid about people watching me ride and would get very nervous and uptight and work self into a nervous wreck! Not the ideal for doing dressage when the whole world is probably stnading at the end of the arena watching....
I started to get the "What the hell " attitude..... and went out more and more..... Now its just classed as being dressed up posh for anotheer schooling session!
 
Familiarity breeds contempt.. well, make that relaxation!! My only tip is to keep competing.. a lot.. it all gets easier and you become a pro.. even if you don't get placed, it eventually becomes fun!!
 
I better start practising the test then
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I can only say that alcohol and just thinking 'tough sh*t if it all goes wrong' are what works with me. I also think 'there will be something else to worry about tomorrow so just get on with it' helps me realise that what I am doing is very insignificant.

However, I think you are more stubborn than me (meaning I'm a walk over) so that when someone tells me (ie S or K) tells me to just get on and do it, I do it - but they are far more experienced than me and I trust them, they have been there and done it. Perhaps you need them or someone like them? I feel a bit pathetic trying to advise you on a dressage test cos I ain't done one myself and not likely to in the near future.

I advise the following, however, this is what I would personally do and feel free to ignore me
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1. Book another test at either Rodbaston or where we had the lesson - there is a BBC comp there in Feb and it will be very low key - you now know both arenas and what to expect. I think the longer you leave it, the bigger an issue it will be.
2. Have some more lessons, first at home and then somewhere else - you need to get your confidence back in your basic stuff, the rest will follow.
3. Have someone to read the test.
4. Have someone bring alcohol.
5. Write down your fears, is it you tensing up or are you scared of S playing up, falling off... whatever, and I bet that we will have an answer to all of them.

My favourite saying is 'Nothing is the end of the world'. We all can make the biggest mistakes but we can pick ourselves up and go on to face another day - we always have second chances.

Re: Last Saturday - Do you think it helped that I just ignored you when you wanted to go back? Do we need to get tough with you? I promise not to be offended if you tell me to eff off but if it works I wont let you leave the arena until you have done the test
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And I will persuade you to go for a blast next time - I'll just say that Chum took off with me and I couldn't stop
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