To all those not so perfect riders...

W

WeeBrown

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I have read a few posts recently, including the w&t post, and the comments/constructive crit given, and just felt like sharing this.
I have been riding for loads of years..I could post the pics of my wonderful transition from 5 year old riding school pupil to 33 year old numpty rider....the years past and the ability improved, very slowly :)
Throughout these years one thing has held me back the most - me. Me and being so worried about being perfect. Worried about what people will think and say about my riding. Whilst participating in my weekly riding school lessons I could ride well (of course I didn't think this as I have far too much of a downer on myself) and achieved tons. However, get me back on my own horse at the yard and I was useless. I worried about where her head was, did people think I sat correctly, held my hands perfect etc. I was rubbish because I felt rubbish. Then my riding instructor at the riding school asked how I was getting on with my horse and I told him everything. He didn't say "Get shot of the horse it's too good for you" and he didn't say "You need more lessons". What he did say was that I was holding myself back and to just get out there. Who cares if I rode like a numpty during a dressage test or if I took the worse lines ever during a jumping course, I needed to stop questioning myself and just get on with it.
So I did get on with it...but I only picked the things I thought I might do o.k at -w&t tests, clear rounds etc. I held back on doing other stuff as I was still concerned I'd look ****.
Then a woman who had just started riding her friend's horse at our yard bought a pony for her daughter who had been having lessons for a little while. This girl who has been riding for 5 mins is my inspiration. She doesn't worry if she misses out jumps due to steering, she doesn;t care if her horse's confirmation means not getting placed in showing classes or if it takes off with her during her 'show' and canters to the back of the line up, she's out there doing everything and having a laugh. She and my instructor have got me (unknowingly) entering prelims and going xc schooling.
So after my ramblings I just want to say -don't wait til you're perfect, you'll never be perfect as riding is all about the next step, just get out there and say s*d it, I'm going to do everything and have a blast! Oh and a huge "Thanks" to my wonderful riding instructor and the little girl on my yard...she jumped without reins tonight :)
 
Yay for hot choccy! :D

I agree with MM, WeeBrown, and inspirational post!

While Im not that great a rider at all, I try bloody hard and work my socks off, and it has got me somewhere! xx
 
Here Here!

I gave up caring a long time ago :). Best time was jumping my horse in the school, just messing about. My style wasn't the best - a few we took in hunting seat as he took off before I was ready and the 'tweenies' at the yard were aghast and giving me the look. I didn't care and carried on laughing like a neep :).

I used to go jumping and when I fell off once I just got up - laughing - and caught my horse and shrugged and said Oh well. Everyone else was like "oh my god, how embarassing" I was more "mer, stuff happens"

When I am on my horse, I don't care one iota what I look like :).
 
Yup, I'm with WT on this :D

So long as Dizz knows what I want her to do and does it, and so long as I manage to stay on top and it's not the other way round, physically or otherwise lol, and we haven't disappeared down a ditch, then I'm happy :D
 
Totally agree.

I used to be a fearless rider. I would bomb around everywhere and get on anything. I did work experience in newmarket at 17 and loved it.

Then 2 years ago I had an accident which dislocated my knee and gave me loads of bad bruising and whip lash and meant I couldnt ride for 4 months. When I did get the courage up to get back on, I was terrified, I have only recently started cantering again, and my best friend gave me a jumping lesson recently too which was awesome.

I felt like a completely ineffective and useless rider and then I had a lesson on Bondi 3 weeks ago and my RI got all teary eyed about how well I had come on, and how she is pleased that my riding has returned to its former glory and more. She has even has just loaned a horse for me and her son to ride too. Marcy is utterly perfect so I am 100% back in the saddle.
 
so so agree with the OP - for years i thought that you had to be a fantastic rider to compete at anything - i spent far too much time listening to the haters & the doubters & Ruby & I missed out on so much - had we started dresage earlier I would definitely be riding affilaited novice now but at our combined age of 70 we have decided to just get on with it while she is still able for it - grasp the day:)
 
So very true!

Don't really understand it myself, I've ridden literally since I was a toddler but have progressively got more of a complex about making a fool of myself. Stupid really, who cares (just not sure this positive attitude will last when I decide to go forth horse hunting again)... :(
 
i know exactly where you're coming from on this one! And well done for getting out there and giving things a go!

I always feel bad about my riding ability, and i hate it when there are people watching a lesson that are better riders than me! Ithink that riders are the worst people to judge sometimes!

I have gained some confidence however in a small yard showjumping league the riding stables i go to runs. The first time i went i only wanted to do the two smallest classes, but my riding instructor told me i would be fine in the bigger (only 2'9) class as well and wouldn't let me enter the smallest class! I was terrified of making a fool out of myself and although the first time i did it we had plenty of run outs (my fault entirely) the rest of the yard, mostly with their own horses really cheered me and everyone else just for comnpleting the round, even if it did go pear shaped! After 3 or 4 of these little competitions i started to win the 2'6, and even the 2'9 class, and eventually won the whole mini jumping league that year! :)
Without pushing myself to ride a course at a height i had never jumped before i never would have known i could eventually win one! (having said that the horse is a good little jumping machine that happily takes me round as long as i don't mess up too much :o:rolleyes: )

Even though i'm not a very good rider, theres no way of knowing what you can achieve unless you give it a go and don't give up!

:D
 
You're spot on and this is just what I needed to read tonight and my RI would want to shake your hand for what you've written and tell me to read it regularly! Thank you :)
 
Very good point WB, ithas been worrying me that my riding is on a downhill slope due to age. I cant ride like I used to and it really annoys me.It PEEVES me (I think peeve is probablly allowed by TFC but it wasnt my first choice of word:D)that I get dumped by some youngster when I would never have been suckered by it 30 years ago. I kind of feel that I have to pr0uve somthing all the time .(sp check ,how the hell do you spell prouve?). Maybe I should take a leaf out of your book.
 
A hugely inspirational post!

I know exactly how you feel, Last year I decided to go back to college to do what I love most and started on a diploma course in horse management... this was after 5 years off of riding and having no contact with horses what so ever as life was so hectic, (new baby etc) I got my confidence up and went in for the riding assessment, and sure enough got onto the course and started to progress well... within 6 months Id passed my bhs stage one, and started working towards stage 2 and the riding and road safety, I passed the riding and road safety but was told I wasnt advanced enough to do the riding section for the stage 2 exam, this was when everything started to fall apart for me, I slowly but surely lost every ounce of confidence I ever had on a horse, due to constantly thinking I was doing everything wrong, I felt old compared to the other people on the course, ineffective in the saddle, you name it it went wrong and I blamed it on myself, even if some of the girls were giggling over something else it felt to me like they were laughing at me...
anyway long story cut short... I quit college, brought myself a youngster and I havent looked back.. Ive regained my confidence (nearly, but i still feel incredibly uncomfortable being watched when riding!) It dawned on me about 3 months ago when i was in my pit of self pity.... what does it matter what other people think?! Why should I care that someone may be thinking to themselves 'shes got her hands too high, or her position is awful' I ride horses because I love to, I enjoy being on my horse, to feel that emotional connection between horse and rider, if there is no enjoyment anymore then there is no point in doing it...youve just gotta love what you do! and to hell with anyone else and their opinions!
 
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Great post and I will take your advice. I have had a few years of mainly once weekly hacks and feel totally pants in the school ATM, feel I have no control over my body and really lack confidence. But the best way to improve is to just get out and do it!

BTW Mike - it's 'prove' :)
 
crikey, how true! I was a RI, in my previous life nearly 30 years ago, but I have the most awful position because I am lazy and ride so my back is comfortable, I ride deep and am well balanced with very good hands but look awful. I have never had a riding lesson and wouldn't dare now, any instructor would have a blurdy heart attack if they saw me. I can sit anything and get the horse to do what I want/need it to do and I am brave (or stupid) and will ride anything. I gave up caring a long time ago and accepted that if I were to enjoy my riding then I had to do it my way.
 
I ve always considered myself to be a bad rider, but I read a lot and watch good riders and I think I ve picked up a lot of techniques and principles. Ultimately I now ride how I think is best for my horse, using a combination of English and Western styles incorporated.
I try to be quiet rider with soft hands (thinking about mouths) and clear signals for directions and leads etc. I no longer care what people think of my riding as long as my horse feels happy beneath me and can do as I ask him without stress. Not caring gave me the confidence to start doing Dressage tests and ridden class and we have done very well with plently of 1st, 2nd, and 3rds so I guess the judges think I am good enough.
If you do what is best for your horse,when training him it will ultimately make you a good/better rider.
 
Here here, what a great post!

Middle finger salute to the arrogants who try to grind the rest of us down :)
 
Great great Message! :-)

I stay away from a lot of posts digging at what people choose to do because they make me so mad and I don't want to get involved.

I have ridden all my life, worked from 16 in yards, qualified as a RI, did everything, rode anything,competed and was a good rider.
Cue, 16 years break from having, riding horses/marriage and 2 children later I bought a horse 2 years ago.

I now feel I can't ride for toffee, my position needs work, I need to build my core strength and Generally my riding has gone totally downhill. I need to learn all over again. In the 2 years I have had him, we have had lots of things happen. I had an op and couldn't ride for months, then he ripped his chest open in an accident so we have had the odds against us. I am heavier than I was so ride totally differently, feel that I don't deserve to have such a lovely promising horse when I feel I can't bring out his potential. I never feel I am good enough for him

BUT..... i love my horse, he is 100% loved, cared for, he wants for nothing and even if all I can manage is 25 minutes schooling ( and I use the term schooling very loosely :D ) we have fun, we have a fantastic bond and he doesn't judge me. It make take a year or 2 (or 10!!) but we will get there eventually with help.

As soon as we get it together I fully intend on getting him out and trying things. And yes, I plan on doing some w&t tests to test his reactions and my nerves and will just have to try and not and think about the negativity of others.

Someone (I can't remember who) said on a thread yesterday something along the lines of how dangerous the things people can say sometimes making riders feel inadequate, not good enough etc for wanting to wear a BP or enter a W & T test and that snobbery puts people of trying the sport.

It is very true as it made me think, god, what are people gonna think and say about me when I rock up on my gorgeous horse, possibly looking like sack of spuds and just doing a W & T test.


This thread has made me feel so much better, that there are also so many unsnobbish riders out there who just want to have fun, and enjoy their horse and not care what people think.

I was also told, it is the people who look down on you that have issues and insecurity, not you so we all need to believe in that.

Here's to many years of muddling through. making mistakes, having off days, not being the perfect rider/owner and just enjoying our lovely horses.

Cheers :)
 
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