Too fat to ride?

My pony is 13.5hh and I weigh 17st, although most of that is my brain coz I has got a PHD but its only in chocolate eating so not sure that counts. Anyway, i have calculated that if i ride totally butt naked with just a big cushion instead of a saddle (coz her spine is a bit sticky uppy as her belly has dropped what with her being heavily in foal and no one wants a vertebrae going up their foof when doing sitting trot do they) she should be o.k to go for a few hours a day. She has plenty of bone (well, one of her legs is proper fat looking anyway) so thats good isnt it. I haven't used a tape on her because i am scared she gets tapeworm. So my questions are, what colour cushion should I use (the mare is bay and I am blonde upstairs and dark below) and will I get arrested for being totally naked on a horse or did the Lady Godiva Act make that all o.k??
 
Fun Times said:
My pony is 13.5hh and I weigh 17st, although most of that is my brain coz I has got a PHD but its only in chocolate eating so not sure that counts. Anyway, i have calculated that if i ride totally butt naked with just a big cushion instead of a saddle (coz her spine is a bit sticky uppy as her belly has dropped what with her being heavily in foal and no one wants a vertebrae going up their foof when doing sitting trot do they) she should be o.k to go for a few hours a day. She has plenty of bone (well, one of her legs is proper fat looking anyway) so thats good isnt it. I haven't used a tape on her because i am scared she gets tapeworm. So my questions are, what colour cushion should I use (the mare is bay and I am blonde upstairs and dark below) and will I get arrested for being totally naked on a horse or did the Lady Godiva Act make that all o.k??
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L.O.L!!
 
Fun Times said:
My pony is 13.5hh and I weigh 17st, although most of that is my brain coz I has got a PHD but its only in chocolate eating so not sure that counts. Anyway, i have calculated that if i ride totally butt naked with just a big cushion instead of a saddle (coz her spine is a bit sticky uppy as her belly has dropped what with her being heavily in foal and no one wants a vertebrae going up their foof when doing sitting trot do they) she should be o.k to go for a few hours a day. She has plenty of bone (well, one of her legs is proper fat looking anyway) so thats good isnt it. I haven't used a tape on her because i am scared she gets tapeworm. So my questions are, what colour cushion should I use (the mare is bay and I am blonde upstairs and dark below) and will I get arrested for being totally naked on a horse or did the Lady Godiva Act make that all o.k??
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If you use a really fluffy cushion no one will notice your butt is naked. Do you think a couple of tassels upstairs will push you over the weight limit?
 
Loving this thread. Anyone who thinks 14 stone is obese and therefore will maim/kill/knacker a horse clearly hasn't heard of Geoff billington or any other male rider tbh. And as for those who said that a 14stone women is different to a 14stone man - well, yes, in that men don't have boobs on anterior chest which alter balance (depending on size obs lol) but 14stone is 14 stone - no matter how you feel about it. OP yeah you may be a bit heavy for a 14h pony but a cob could carry you no problem!
Oh and of course a balanced rider will damage a horse less than an unbalanced - but that is true no matter if you are a 6 stone or a 17 stone rider!!


As for qualifications, well, tbh equine science isn't really seen as a "real" degree in uni circles including students - kinda gets lumped in with the golf management and history of art type degrees. I know that ES is hard work and does have a science component but what field of work does it lend to? Apart from being a groom/riding school esq jobs etc. where it may be better off just learning via working as a groom etc. it is hard to see what the degree is used for. For the record, the above is general opinion. A few of my friends have used it as a stepping stone to go on and do equine Physio - which you can do straight away (Not the ACPAT route the other one) without having ES. But they enjoyed the degree and it gave them access to a wider understanding which will help them as a Physio.

Anyway, people who have PhDs are entitled to be proud of their qualification - they have worked incredibly hard to get it and are usually top of their given field. They deserve all the kudos they can get as a PhD is not easy and requires a lot more paper reading than I could cope with :p
Having a PhD deserves respect. And is something to be very very proud of!!
 
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cobgoblin said:
If you use a really fluffy cushion no one will notice your butt is naked. Do you think a couple of tassels upstairs will push you over the weight limit?
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Tassells? Surely thats a health and safety risk as they could get tangled in the bits of baler twine I am using for reins (another top weight saving tip, although I am down to three useable fingers on each hand now though).

ester said:
Or just think you haven't done any ahem maintenance for a while...
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I don't like what you are implying Ester. Pony is fully maintained and has her teeth checked and feet trimmed regularly. How dare you imply otherwise. My foof by contrast is completely out of all control tho.
 
Perhaps you'd be ok if you ensured you got a non foof coloured cushion... :eek3:.

Baler twine must save on more weight too though ;) especially if you lose fingers too?
 
*Runs in with popcorn*

Just my twopennorth (and there's me without a PhD or anything!) but despite my cob being a weighty horse with over ten inches of bone, I don't really want more than 13/14 stones on him because of his arthritis. It's not as simple as saying yeah, h/w type, shove the whole family on him. Other factors need to be taken into account.
 
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ester said:
Perhaps you'd be ok if you ensured you got a non foof coloured cushion... :eek3:.

Baler twine must save on more weight too though ;) especially if you lose fingers too?
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Yeah the baler twine is a real weight saver. Especially as before I used to have her in two bits (coz she pulls like a train) and this way I have dispensed with both of them and just run the twine through her mouth. She don't pull no more either. And the best bit is....no tack cleaning!
 
Smurf's Gran said:
I am also wondering if those who are considering that the study does not apply to their horse or weight are significantly over the 20%, but don't want to consider this - Its good that your horse is still doing well - there will always be ones that will - equally there will also be ones that wont also, and the study is there as a guide.
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I'd be willing to put my life on it that there isn't a single rider on this thread who is significantly over the 20% and riding. Perhaps you would like to suggest what 'significantly over' might be, as you seem to state your opinion as fact on every other matter.
 
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Fun Times said:
Bit inconsiderate in view of the fact OP is trying to lose weight. ��
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Popcorn is low in fat, I'll have you know, apart from the mince pie flavour I had one Christmas. Strangely moreish. I hear *cough cough* that there's also a chocolate covered version....

ester said:
She didn't say she was sharing though :p.
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Yeah, gerroff my popcorn!! :mad3:
 
They sell a healthy chocolate one at work. It is very disappointing.

It would be better if it had about 5x more chocolate on.
 
I've got marshmallows (flumps) if anyone wants some?
They are fat free and swell in my stomach so prevent me from eating anything else = diet aid :p
 
JFTD said:
No idea, wagtail, I haven't been near either of them with a tape in years and for the life of me can't remember what they were taping then. I had been going to tape f tonight as you had asked, but don't think I will bother since you're being so charming about it.
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No worries. It was just because you said that your younger one taped less than F that I asked thinking you knew what they taped at. I asked you twice and you ignored both requests so I asked again in case you'd missed it.
 
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cinnamontoast said:
I have kindly trawled the Internet for a suitable outfit for Funtimes, usefully crotchless to accommodate her food cushion, gosh, I'm kind. :biggrin3: http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/OPAQUE-CR...Domain_3&var=410668918826&hash=item19faf19b89



Or was just chocolate without the popcorn, perhaps? It should not be the peripheral ingredient!
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Thanks CT, that looks spot on. I wonder if they do them in wasabi green to match my exercise bandages. I have to ensure we are matchy matchy as anything else just looks tacky dunnit.
 
Oh they do wasabi popcorn too, it is really annoying as smells nice when my colleague has some in the office but tastes foul.
 
errr

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