Ugh - what do they teach kids at riding schools these days!!!

[Noodles_3]

I can see it two ways...

Op I can see from your point of view that basically it is just a waste of time and you wanted a sharer to help you with your horse but now you will more than likely have to teach lessons and 'babysit'. Is it worth it?

Then on the other hand, I do feel for the girl. It's taken 6 months to get to this point and everyone has to start somewhere. She was probably quite competent riding at the riding school in her own little way (rightly or wrongly!) and now she has had to totally change her way of riding! I do think the poor thing has probably lost a lot of confidence, as other people have stated.

The good thing here is that she sounds very committed to your horse and if you can just spend a little time with her or advise her to have lessons on digby, then you've probably got yourself a good little sharer. She will get better with time, she just sounds ultimately like she's had a confidence knock. She needs praising and positive support.

However at the moment it's not safe she's riding this horse, especially if she's going to be unsupervised and if you haven't got time, maybe best to have words with her mother and tell her the truth.

 

[cptrayes]

Give the poor girl some help. Put a bridle and a daisy rein on your naughty pony who keeps taking advantage of her inexperience to get some grub.

 

[stormox]

Stick with her and help her- we were all beginners once. She's keen- and comitted- and you cant teach that, but you CAN teach someone to ride better!
Help her now and she'l repay you in time to come. Dont expect something for nothing- you'd have to pay a good rider money,so why not pay her by helping her?

 

[HBM1]

If you are constantly commenting on her riding she may have lost all confidence around you. Poor girl..she must be committed to keep going.

 

[Clannad48]

Hmmm six months of commitment and work, especially through the winter and NOW you think she's not fit to ride your horse........... words fail me

 

[Honey08]

I had a girl come to look at my horse re sharing it this week. On paper she was perfect, but she didn't get on with the horse, the horse was obviously unhappy with her riding. The horse is very sharp and I couldn't see her getting there, so I apologised and said no. I didn't give her a DVD and leave her riding in a halter for the whole winter, just shouting hi/bye as I passed her, expecting her to get better herself!!

I have another sharer who wasn't balanced and was green, who shares my other horse. I have helped her all winter and she has got a lot better - its all worked out well..

I think you are both in different camps, both sides with negative issues and it would be better to part ways and find people that suit you and her better. Perhaps you could help her look for someone with a more suitable pony?

 

[skint1]

OP I do understand that you're frustrated because you're feeling having a sharer hasn't actually saved you any time and you're worried for Digby if you think he's not happy, but I hope you'll take on board some of the comments people have offered.

My daughter's early riding was similar to your sharer's, it took her a long, long time to "retrain" her mind, and she rode every day and had regular instruction, and as I am sure you're aware, even experienced riders have those annoying little habits they must always strive to correct. Maybe now the weather is improving and we have more daylight your sharer can ride more often and it will click for her

 

[baran]

She does not ride him unsupervised!!!!!! There is always!!! Somebody with her!!! At all times!! Im not irresponsible with her safety!!!

Who is supervising her? Does the person supervising her know anything about horses? I had several sharers for one horse (ideal for novice rider) but I ALWAYS made sure I or OH was around for first few weeks to keep an eye on things. You may not feel you are responsible for the child (debatable if she had an accident) but you are responsible for your horse.

 

[Littlelegs]

I have seen awful riding by the pupils of one local rs, its dire. But, its hardly the fault of the pupils. And tbh if you're unfeeling enough to slag her on a forum, then heaven knows how you make her feel in person. Sounds to me like you just wanted a mug all winter & now any excuse will do.

 

[Cinnamontoast]

Call me insane, but I interviewed people who came asking to share! They rode and I turned down the ones who couldn't ride properly. I asked a whole ton of questions to people who responded to my ad and declined to meet some of them because they were very inexperienced or whatever. I wanted someone who could come and ride with little or no help.

If this poor child can't do as asked, why did you let her carry on for so long without a trial that you could end or some support?

 

[CazD]

I can see it two ways...

Op I can see from your point of view that basically it is just a waste of time and you wanted a sharer to help you with your horse but now you will more than likely have to teach lessons and 'babysit'. Is it worth it?

Then on the other hand, I do feel for the girl. It's taken 6 months to get to this point and everyone has to start somewhere. She was probably quite competent riding at the riding school in her own little way (rightly or wrongly!) and now she has had to totally change her way of riding! I do think the poor thing has probably lost a lot of confidence, as other people have stated.

The good thing here is that she sounds very committed to your horse and if you can just spend a little time with her or advise her to have lessons on digby, then you've probably got yourself a good little sharer. She will get better with time, she just sounds ultimately like she's had a confidence knock. She needs praising and positive support.

However at the moment it's not safe she's riding this horse, especially if she's going to be unsupervised and if you haven't got time, maybe best to have words with her mother and tell her the truth.

Id agree with this.

 

[ladyt25]

Does the child enjoy riding the pony? Is she having fun? Does she need to trot? If she needs help then either arrange for an instructor to come and assist or help her yourself. I personally don't see why she shouldn't be able to plod along and enjoy how she wants to ride. If she just wants to walk then why can't she? Your pony sounds a little naughty so it wouldn't do any harm fitting a daisy rein to stop him taking the Mick. Are there any kids she can ride out with? Kids learn from each other and this may really help her confidence too. Shane to get rid of someone who sounds dedicated and keen

 

[Valadictory]

I can see why you are frustrated, however feel mostly for the pony and for the young girl. As far as I can see from what you have written, you told her that the way that she had learned to ride was incorrect, gave her some Parelli DVDs and told her to ride in a halter.

At the age of 13, this person is still a child, you gave no further instruction, neither did you show her how you wanted the horse to be ridden. I would imagine at the age of 13, that this child's confidence was somewhat dented with your approach, and in this you greatly reduced the chance of the sharer coming to you for advice, as they were probably afraid that you would critisise them, with reason, this reducing the opportunity for open and honest dialogue.

In this situation, you are the adult, and if you weren't happy with the way that she rode, you owed it to your pony, and to her to be honest but also to be supportive if you wanted the share to continue. My balance as a child wasn't great, and looking back I probably balanced on the reins, until my RI had me trotting on a lunge rein with no stirrups and no reins. Not surprisingly, after a couple of sessions of this, my balance improved no ends.

I think that you owe it to her, after spending the winter months probably doing a fair amount of the chores, to approach this in a calm and supportive manner, offering instruction and guidance. Whilst I understand that lunging is not an option at the moment, could you spare 5 minutes to watch her ride on the road or out hacking, walking with her to give her confidence and to show her what she should be doing. Also the addition of a neck strap would probably greatly help, as would a bridle. I think at that age, having spent so long in a RS no matter how wonderful the owner said that the horse was without a bridle, I'd be nervous as I'd be taken out of my comfort zone on an unknown horse.

In all honesty, the child has been put in an awkward situation and by the sounds of it has still persisted. This amount of resiliance and persistance is to be admired while riding skills can often by taught with patience and support

 

[bluewhippet]

What a patronising post! Firstly , you took this young rider on to ride your pony knowing full well of her abilities, did you think she would magically transform with no help or lessons?
Why on earth did you allow her to ride him if you didn't think her capabilities matched your idea of a rider for the pony?
This young lady has bent over backwards to help you in all weathers and to come on a forum and slate her abilities is disgraceful.
As for riding schools, they teach people to ride who cannot afford the luxury of their own ponies, they give people the chance to ride and enjoy a HOBBY. Maybe your young lady should stick to the riding school, help out there and perhaps be appreciated!!!

Couldn't agree more!

 

[ainouu]

Also the addition of a neck strap would probably greatly help, as would a bridle.

This, especially the neck strap. Even if you can't lunge, maybe just lead reining her in walk and slow trot so that she could just focus on balance and hold on to the neck strap to stop her from falling off.

IMO the best way to improve balance is to ride bareback or without stirrups in a safe environment in a lunge/lead rein so that you can concentrate on achieving a balanced seat.

My best teacher was my first pony who hadn't been ridden much and we didn't even have a saddle. I got on him and off we went into the field, the pony bucking his heart out and me falling off until I learned to 'read' his movements and balance myself. Not the best/safest way to learn and wouldn't recommend it in this case..

 

[Crugeran Celt]

Not sure what they do teach in riding schools these days but there do seem to be many children having lessons who seem to have very little common sense around the animals and no confidence handling them from the ground. I learnt many, many, many years ago and I was encouraged to handle the ponies as much as possible from the ground and had riding lessons where everything in the early stages was based on soft hands and balance and not to interfere with the horse as much as possible. For some reason they don't teach tacking up either. I had a young woman riding my gelding and her riding was fine and she was very confident but she couldn't put a bridle on!! I had to tack him up when she rode. Don't know what your solution is but i wouldn't be happy if my pony was miserable when this child rode.

 

[Tnavas]

Not sure what they do teach in riding schools these days but there do seem to be many children having lessons who seem to have very little common sense around the animals and no confidence handling them from the ground. I learnt many, many, many years ago and I was encouraged to handle the ponies as much as possible from the ground and had riding lessons where everything in the early stages was based on soft hands and balance and not to interfere with the horse as much as possible. For some reason they don't teach tacking up either. I had a young woman riding my gelding and her riding was fine and she was very confident but she couldn't put a bridle on!! I had to tack him up when she rode. Don't know what your solution is but i wouldn't be happy if my pony was miserable when this child rode.

As an ex riding school proprietor one of the reasons for not having the actual rider tack up is the time factor. A busy riding school cannot factor in the time/cost that it takes when a young rider is learning to tack up. Imagine 6 young riders all trying to learn to brush at the same time? You'd never get to the riding stage. HM lessons come separately!

My school had a holiday programme where we encouraged riders to attend for the whole day. This was when HM was taught. We had certificates - simalar the ABRS weekend rider tests. Each rider had to attend two days of a holiday programme and at the end of the second dday they took and HM & Riding test for the relevent level.

Riding schools are only as good as the instructor giving the lessons, unfortunately many beginners get the trainee instructors teaching them often without supervision. Beginners need the most experienced instructors who will ensure the rider maintains a correct position, unfortunately many schools forget this or price the good instructor out of the range of the novice rider.

Also the quality of ponies is often poor - when a child has to spend their whole time trying to keep the pony going they cannot develop a quiet balanced seat. It seems to be a mindset thatr riding school owners think they have to have exceedlingly quiet ponies - they don't they need ponies that are free moving and obedient. It can happen, mine were all 32 of them and when an old instructor and I were reminising the other day we reallised that we rarely had riders fall off and in 10 years only one broken arm and an ankle! Not bad for a school turning over 300+ riders a week.

This young rider deserves the help in return for her dedication - either arrange for lessons for her or spare some time to help her yourself. BUT BE NICE!!! Negative comments NEVER help but POSITIVE does!

Think of this comment - which would you prefer to see in your dressage test!

Halt not square or Halt almost square?

Only a tiny comment on a test but if can make you feel totally different about the halt.