UPDATE #2..."2 Days at new livery and already miserable"

cc14

cc14

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So I have now been at said livery for a week. Anyone who read my first thread will know my first 2 days were not the best one could wish for (being told my horse is useless, I shouldnt buy him, how unfortunate that I already have, he is a good for nothing, your step-dad is just a dealer so probably doesnt care about your horse...etc).

Things got a little better a few days later when a lovely livery took us both out on a hack to show me the area...after I had panicked B was going to be silly and exciteable and he had told me to shut up because were going for a fun gallop, we had a really lovely time.

Now I feel I'm back to square one again. Today I was told that B needed his teeth checking by the dentist who was there at the time. I explained he had his teeth done about three weeks ago, but YO just wanted to know when he next needed to be booked in for. I then heard YO whispering to dentist, then say "and thats why I want him checked by YOU." I dont know exactly what was said, but I'm sure it was relating to the comment about step-dad not caring and assuming it was probably a half hearted job by some backstreet dentist (highly unlikely). Luckily dentist had a feel and said he had been done exceptionally well and how well mannered B was :rolleyes:

I then found that my lunging whip had been taken and used, not a problem. But it had not been put back...not the end of the world. I then noticed B's headcollar on another horse..ok still not quite the end of the world (it is the one I leave on the gate to his fence incase of emergency). I then noticed that his leadrope had been taken off this headcollar and replaced...meaning one of my leadropes has now vanished. This may sound like petty things, but to a student who has put a lot of money into buying B everything he needs, I didnt appreciate this too much.

Im sure lots of people will say grin and bear it, because its what happens at places like this, but Im really finding it quite hard, as I just feel like me and my horse are constantly being judged. Plus its about 20 minutes away, and not a nice 20 minutes either (dual carriageway/motorway). But Im fairly sure I wont find anything closer without the same problems.

Gah :( Any friendly advice/similar experience? I think there is some 5 day old pizza in my student fridge I could offer?
 
I wouldn't be happy with people taking my stuff personally, borrowing is fine but put it back and if you break it replace it! Don't think all yards are like that tbh, the last yard I was at was mainly DIY and very friendly and no one took my stuff (borrowed it yes but it was returned). Luckily am now on private yard so only me and owner so stuff pretty much stays where we put it! :D

Give it a bit longer but if you are not happy there then keep a discreet eye out for alternatives ;)

Edited to say don't let the judging thing get to you, they may just be a little 'misguided' in looking out for you, but if it starts to get out of hand then confront them and if that doesn't work then move, it is supposed to be supportive and fun at yards!
 
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You have every right to be annoyed, doesn't matter how much things cost (well it does) but even if there things like lead ropes etc, it all adds up specially if you are a student let alone if you are working.

No it's not on, you need to speak to your YO and explain what has been happening and that your not happy about it, if your YO doesn't know then you can't expect them to sort it, you pay to keep your horse there, not pay for other people to help themselves to your stuff.
 
I rememeber your post the first time and I couldn't cope either with all that stuff. I used to be a two different "big" yards and the things as you describe were the norm, things would always go missing, get broken and my horse blamed for breaking it and replacements added onto my bill. In the end I found a lovely small yard where none of the above ever happen, nothing has to be locked away as no one uses other peoples stuff or if they do they ask or say they have used it and its always put back. I had to compromise on having a indoor school and a seperate jumping arena, but we are fine with that a cope fine. I could not and would not put up with stuff like that anymore. I'd be thinking about moving TBH and maybe changing/compromising on other aspects of the livery yard to get away from this kind of stuff.
 
Don't leave your things at the yard - or if you have to, lock them away. Keep your headcollar in your stable as well.

As for the Yard Owner - probably really well meaning. Just stand your ground politely and get on with things your way. It will be fine.
 
It isnt acceptable for the YO to contradict you and ask another dentist to check your horses teeth and then complain about you!!
I work on a livery yard and my god, we would never behave like that, shes a "professional".

As for the borrowing and not putting back, i wouldnt like that either, im very particular and it would annoy me, its not the borrowing its the not returning that would upset me.

To be honest, if the YO is behaving like that, never mind the rest of them, id leave as i wouldnt trust them to be professional with my horse. They have a duty of care, and tbh, i dont like sound of him/her.

Poor you, hugs and sympathy!! xx
 
Thankyou everyone.

Im reluctant to leave because B really has settled...this morning he was fast asleep in his field lying down completely chilled, gave a little whinney and a roll when I went over to him. I worry that moving him again in such a short space of time could stress him out a fair bit. I also spent so long trying to find a livery yard that was affordable but offered everything I needed I doubt I would have much luck again, given I live in concrete city! :(
 
claudiacox14 said:
Thankyou everyone.

Im reluctant to leave because B really has settled...this morning he was fast asleep in his field lying down completely chilled, gave a little whinney and a roll when I went over to him. I worry that moving him again in such a short space of time could stress him out a fair bit. I also spent so long trying to find a livery yard that was affordable but offered everything I needed I doubt I would have much luck again, given I live in concrete city! :(
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In that case you must suck it up - and crack on. A week is no time at all.

Good luck :D
 
As with everyone else I'm not happy when people 'borrow' my stuff and then don't put it back.
I would politley ask the YO if she knows where your leadrope is.
If you don't mind them borrowing stuff make sure you make it clear that you don't mind but it needs to be put back where it was in the condition it was taken.
If you don't want them borrowing stuff then as someone else suggested don't leave it on the yard, or if they have space on the yard see if you can put a shed up and all your stuff can be together and locked away.
 
Well unfortunately if you have no option theres not much you can do, maybe talk to the YO although if she behaves like that, i wouldnt hold much hope in her actions!!

Good luck!!
 
I hate Livery Yards (so glad im not on one anymore) But i feel your pain.

Taking without asking amounts to stealing in my book.

Do NOT leave anything lying around - put everything away and locked away.
Do you have anywhere to lock anything away?

give it another few weeks and if no joy then perhaps look to move.
 
If you don't make at least a bit of a fuss about your stuff going walkies it will get worse and worse because people will assume they can get away with it. I would consider making a bit of a fuss.

Taking someone's possessions and not returning them is equivalent to theft.
 
I also dont doubt that YO is well meaning and trying to be helpful, when I have asked for advice she has always been v helpful and friendly. Its just getting to a point where I think unnecessary comments are being made and advice is maybe not being distributed as/when/how is appropriate.

amymay - his main headcollar is kept in my car, said headcollar is kept on the gate of his field incase there was an emergency and horses needed to be caught and brought in. There is nowhere to lock away stuff at the yard and my car and house is far too small to store all his stuff!
 
If you don't want to leave then sounds like you willl just have to grin and bare it, if that is the example the YO is setting to the rest of the liveries you really have no hope with changing it TBH. If your horse has settle so quickly into, what sounds like, a fairly unprofessionaly run yard then I'm sure he will be fine to settle into another yard, I wouldn't worry about that.
 
claudiacox14 said:
I also dont doubt that YO is well meaning and trying to be helpful, when I have asked for advice she has always been v helpful and friendly. Its just getting to a point where I think unnecessary comments are being made and advice is maybe not being distributed as/when/how is appropriate.

amymay - his main headcollar is kept in my car, said headcollar is kept on the gate of his field incase there was an emergency and horses needed to be caught and brought in. There is nowhere to lock away stuff at the yard and my car and house is far too small to store all his stuff!
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I know you are a student but can you ask for this for xmas:
http://direct.tesco.com/q/R.203-3620.aspx
 
TBH it sounds a real cliquey place and i for one would be off like a shot, horse owning is supposed to be enjoyable, you should not be spending your time worrying over what they're saying about you or what they're doing with your stuff:(
As for B settling, he's soon going to pick up on your unhappiness and that could be more detrimental than moving him again.
Start looking for somewhere else, your time with B should be a welcome break from your studies, at this yard it is never going to be that:(
 
Also made a point of saying "oh look that is my headcollar on a horse which is not mine" but noticed the missing rope too late. Also made quite a firm point about how my lunge whip was left by the school, and got more of an excuse than an apology.

Again, nowhere to lock stuff away (just one big tack room with one locking door) and in a student house so no garden storage and only a small box bedroom and very small hatchback for a car!
 
I have a couple of lockable metal feed bins (from SCATS). They take rugs, tack, first aid kit, expensive supplements, headcollars and leadropes and my dustpan and brush. The latter seems to have little legs and wanders off on its own if I'm not careful.
 
I would start marking everything that is yours in some way and lock away or put away your things when you are not there. It is not acceptable for others to use your kit - I am sure that they wouldn't replace anything that got damaged or broken! I did once have a yard owner use my freshly laundered stable rug because mine was cleaner than hers. I left.

One of my boys is on bute, which I found would decrease once the hunting season starts. The bute now lives in my car.

The bottom line is that, if you can find a way to thwart the "borrowers", then go for it. By the sounds of it, you will need a thick skin to ignore some of the "helpful" comments from the YO, but if a livery has taken you out hacking once already, then that is progress. It sounds as though your horse likes it there, so maybe see how it goes...

Best of luck!
 
Marking suggestions have been taken on board and housemate has loaned me permenant black and silver markers (she may regret this I feel :D)

Tomorrow our names will be on EVERYTHING ;)
 
claudiacox14 said:
amymay - his main headcollar is kept in my car, said headcollar is kept on the gate of his field incase there was an emergency and horses needed to be caught and brought in. There is nowhere to lock away stuff at the yard and my car and house is far too small to store all his stuff!
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Field kept headcollars always go missing - it goes with the territory I'm afraid.

Do you have a tack room - we have lockable boxes per person in mine, where feed and a small amount of personal stuff can be kept, which works brilliantly.

Everything else - including tack obviously - is kept at home.
 
amymay - yep we have a tackroom but it is just basically a huge room with shelves, one shelf per horse. Even more worryingly I have just discovered that "nobody really knows whos rug is whos, we just use whichever" (runs out to buy tin of neon paint to clearly mark up rugs). No lockable boxes sadly. Student house means the only space I get which is mine is my room, and its very boxy. There is literally nowhere to put anything horsey...we have a small kitchen, a small living room, and that is it.
 
claudiacox14 said:
amymay - yep we have a tackroom but it is just basically a huge room with shelves, one shelf per horse. Even more worryingly I have just discovered that "nobody really knows whos rug is whos, we just use whichever" (runs out to buy tin of neon paint to clearly mark up rugs). No lockable boxes sadly. Student house means the only space I get which is mine is my room, and its very boxy. There is literally nowhere to put anything horsey...we have a small kitchen, a small living room, and that is it.
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Clean rugs, keep at home (in your boxy room, packed up).

Rugs that you are using you keep on a pole in your stable.

Feed goes in to bins under your 'shelf', and you buy a small box that can go in your huge room on the floor in the corner for your ods and sods.

It really does not have to be difficult.
 
I find the behaviour of both your YO and fellow liveries shocking.

There is about 40 horses where I am so we're not a small yard, and nothing goes missing, no one touches your stuff.
No one would have to tolerate a bunch of witches bitching about their horse because the YO doesn't tolerate such behaviour.
The crux of your problem is your YO, it will never get much better because she's highly unproffessional.

I'd have hit the fecking roof over the dentist incident, how dare she question the honesty of a paying customer, how insulting, what business is it of hers? What an awful interfering bitch.
Those that think she's well meaning, I doubt you would feel the same if it were your horse and you were being treated like a liar and an idiot.

OP do yourself a favour and find a yard that's run properly x
 
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