URGENT! you all need to know...

ex racer rider

ex racer rider

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Guys, i thought i should warn all fellow equines.
Tonight i found something out whilst i was being 'schooled', human foals eat thoroughbreds !!!
That little pink mini human did a death roar and was about to eat me!
So my fellow equines, especially those of thoroughbred persuasions you should all watch out, they are savage and should be avoided at all costs
Signed little big man.
 
Just you wait til it's 3 yr old and running up behind you trying to give you a heart attack. It won't listen to its mare at all no matter how often it's told not to run/shreik/wave arms about.

And don't get me started on the bits of plastic they lug around known as "toys".

Yours, a similarly put upon Welsh A.
 
More importantly and tell your big human - the small humans' squeak and squeal and have bright round things that they kick about :eek::eek::eek: They're pony eating monsters they are!!!


Mum protect me......

Love,
A frightened little Welsh C X

(Ponies :rolleyes:)
 
your welsh ponies? i dont think your anything like those... those shetlands are you? you did warn me about their flappy things and the round demon balls but your small like shetlands, you wont look at my knees like they are edible will you?

I dont like shetlands, or small humans :confused:
 
Ha well I was going to save it for later but you may as well know now that human foals attract Shetlands like they are going out of fashion. Another year and you'll have one of them to put up with too. If your owner is clever she will get a welsh instead!
 
They don't even start backing them until they are five and it takes thirteen to seventeen YEARS of schooling before they are any use at any kind of job!!!
 
Nooo, my aunty leah (she was riding me) doesnt like human foals, they make her annoyed. She says they squak too much and make sticky mess so she wont bring anyones human foals near us (something about squishy bones and big hoofs)
and I didnt know human foals attracted shetlands!! I will have to watch out (they are devil spawn sent to pick tb's bones!!) and hope the big human finds a welsh (you seem nice)
and backing at 5? I was backed at 2! And had a rull racing career! And they go for all those years without doing anything? Thats not on!
 
Yes Shetlands are horrible things. They have issues due to being stunted. It makes them feel they need to assert themselves.

I have to put up with Shetland sheep, cattle and ponies. But I tell you the ponies are by far the worst.

Welsh ponies are much nicer. I am actually a racing Arab in training but I keep that quiet!

I pretend to like the human foal since apparently it's mare will put me in a tin of pedigree chum (not sure what that means but doesn't sound like there would be much room for prancing!) if I do anything horrible to it but I get my own back by prancing around the field for half an hour before they catch me.

Long suffering, see:

177DFB0A-013D-4FEE-AE6E-3218A7068C96-1469-000001B5186454A4.jpg
 
A racing arab? Cool! I was a racing thoroughbred but now im what my mum and aunty call a 'dressage horse' I dont know what this dressage is but I know its hard work and I have to do fancy flicky things with my toes!
You sould like you have flicky prancy toes? Do you not do this dressage thing?
And I have heard of this 'chum' it doesnt sound nice! All I know is whenever it is mentioned the yard dog laughs.... Im not sure why though?
But its a good idea pretending, your mares human foal looks bigger than the one I saw.... It was in a open fronted mini trailer with a cover and wheels (i wasnt keen on that either)
oh and aunty leah says you have a nice face, not sure why she feels the need to talk to my new pony friend? Humans eh?
 
Dressage is that putting on fancy clothes then. I believe that is in my future :rolleyes: mare intends to dress me up as a red indian pony (ie I will be completely naked!).

I am only a foal myself really (15 months) so I don't have to do much except eat and get led around a bit.

I have very flicky feet so perhaps I may consider this dressage thing if the arab racing career doesn't take off. I am not sure there is an 11.2hh Arab race horse class. Maybe you could advise me on the sort of things I should be doing to prepare for my racing career since you are a race horse!

Human foals have lots of trailers and things. You will have to pretend not to be scared of them like I have to or they will decide to "desensitise" you which believe me is mind numbingly dull and takes a lot of effort to prance around all day while they do the "desensitising" and congratulate themselves on "sorting you out".
 
Ah, I see. Your only a foal yourself, live it up while you can!
As for your racing career I would say go really really fast and be zippy and you will win all of your races, you can practice this in the field but your human mum might panick and mention broken legs but dont worry, just keep running and put in some sharp turns and tear the mud up (great for a roll afterwards)
and this dressage thing isnt too bad, whenever I cross my legs over or do what my aunty is asking a get pats and she calls me a supie star and a good lad... I even get bough brand new dead sheep too go under my saddle so im comfortable so I think I might carry on this dressage thingy.
maybe when your a little older your human foal might do gymkahna thingys on you? You llok like you might be nippy enough for pole bending but make sure the little human doesnt fall off. They sometimes scream when they do!
good luck with you indian pony dress up though?
 
Wait till you have one growing out of you!!
I had one hanging from my neck once, it was huge and loud and I couldn't go out in public without people staring!
I had it removed last September...who knew that if you just bent down in trot they would simply fall off on their own? I suggest this method everytime as it is quick and painless.....for you anyway, small 'Tu-man' ended up with a hard green arm??

Yours
Jazz Sec A


hug.png


And after surgery I kept the Lump!
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Oh my! This human child was not attached to me, was it painfull to have one of them stuck to you? And you kept the small human even after you gave her a green arm?
you welshies seem to have a hard life plagued by small humans!
 
You have had a lucky escape then mate!

Its actually a common infliction of Welsh A's.
Colic hold no fear to a welsh a...it's when when of the Tu-mans has another one over and they do you up like a council house at christmas!
My mate in the next stable bless his hooves is in therapy. He was abused by a group of the small ones and when they turned him out he had PINK SPARKLY HOOVES! If its not bad enough being a boy and having a pink turnout they painted him too!
Well we wet ourselves laughing at him.
Now the smalls wonder why they can't catch him!
 
So it would seem I did! Do you think being a thoroughbred will keep me safe?

and a group (pack?) of them sounds positivley terrifying! Do they make you look like a *ahem* chavv pony? I feel so sorry for you and please offer my get well wishes to your friend. I suggest he has a good roll in the muddiest patch he can find especially if he is white and then they wont be able to jazzle him up through the layers of mud!
thankfully I only get subjected to masculine colours, red is about as girlie as I go ;-)
 
Hell yes they hunt in packs.
Loud little sparkly pink packs.
Listen out for a high pitched squealy noise that makes no sense at all.
When they spot you they emit a sound so high pitched that any dogs on the yard will scream in pain and try and rip off their own ears!
They spends days twirling at your hair and adding things to it and taking them out and adding more.
Its a hard life and to be honest I'm pretty sure you TB types you wouldn't last 30 secs with a pack in full on Bejazzle Mode.
 
thanks oh four hooved ones...

one of the best threads I've read in a long time...

and such insight....

I'm afraid I only have 2 walking legs...
but I have written a training book called 'walk a mile in his hooves...' :)

just wondering if you could put together a companion volume 'run a mile from little shoes...'? :eek:
(that would neatly cover small tu-mans and shetlands in one tome!)
.
 
Its not just little ones that make you look like a council house at Christmas!
My mummy makes me wear purple things and puts silly plait things in my tail, she calls me silly names and has been known to start attaching herself to my neck!
Then she bunches my unruley mane (which has taken me years to perfect the centre parting) and turns me out with my 2 girlfriends (I'm a bit of a ladies man but mummy thinks I'm gay) with these silly bunches in my hair!
Mummy doesn't realise a fine ginger tb like myself deserves more than to be dressed in purple!
So a warning to those eith big mummies, its not just the little human foals that inflict this treatment on you.

Yours

A truely peed off Chesty Bum Bum!
 
Clever big race horse person you will be completely safe. They don't like putting human foals so high off the ground. The best thing to do to make sure is to snort and roll your eyes a bit when one comes close just to reinforce things with your owner. Your main worry is an evil Shetland sharing your life. Hopefully you could get your owner to read this and they would see you'd love a welshie like me as a friend :D

And Jazz you are a very good looking pony if you don't mind me saying!

Where can I get the pink sparkly hoof oil, that would suit my flicky hooves!!
 
I like most human foals, I like to coo at them over my stable door. My human is in charge of schooling them when she's not schooling me and it must be harder with them cos she's often very late to the yard. (whispers) Are they not as clever as thoroughbreds??:D
 
I don't know what you're all talking about. Human foals are lovely. It's nice to stroke their noses and get them to do tricks. Also, they bring treats. Usually sweets, sometimes apples. My mum sometimes brings one down to ride me. By ride, I mean she sits on my back and lets me do whatever I want. I like that. It's better than this "schooling" stuff and it's better than jumping with the human who brings me food because she won't let me go as fast as I can. (it's no wonder we never win!)

Speaking of riding, when your human takes you for what she calls a "hack" you should listen for the sound of human foals. Listen for lots of them together, then make a run towards them and gently dump your human in front of them. You'll get lots of treats from the giggling small ones while your human regains composure. :-)

Love,
Grace.
Xx
 
labruyere said:
thanks oh four hooved ones...

one of the best threads I've read in a long time...

and such insight....

I'm afraid I only have 2 walking legs...
but I have written a training book called 'walk a mile in his hooves...' :)

just wondering if you could put together a companion volume 'run a mile from little shoes...'? :eek:
(that would neatly cover small tu-mans and shetlands in one tome!)
.
Click to expand...

im sure we could all try? :o
 
FfionWinnie said:
Clever big race horse person you will be completely safe. They don't like putting human foals so high off the ground. The best thing to do to make sure is to snort and roll your eyes a bit when one comes close just to reinforce things with your owner. Your main worry is an evil Shetland sharing your life. Hopefully you could get your owner to read this and they would see you'd love a welshie like me as a friend :D

And Jazz you are a very good looking pony if you don't mind me saying!

Where can I get the pink sparkly hoof oil, that would suit my flicky hooves!!
Click to expand...

im glad i will be safe! thats a weight off my withers, thats for sure ;)
And nooo my mummy or aunty arent keen on shetlands but i do have a sister who happens to be a welsh, my mum calls her a D or something? She is coming back home soon as she went away on what they call a 'broodie loan' :confused: i dont know what that is but she should tell me when she comes home.
So if any of the small humans come close i will soon be able to point them in my sisters direction :D
 
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