Very, very angry - horse used without my permission

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So very tricky trying to share a horse with someone you cannot manage to live with?

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You're telling me. It's the mother/daughter share from hell
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Never ever go into any agreement with family
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Hmm it's always tricky being a YO when dealing with horses who are shared by a family. I would think that he perhaps believes the horse is actually owned by your Mum? Who paid for the horse? I expect he believes that your Mother bought the horse; therefore of course he would go to your Mother, being the adult, to ask permission to use the horse.

I can't see why the YO should be responsible for any vet bills which may occur? The cut, you say, happened in the field with his fieldmate? Could have happened at any time or any day, so I can't see how he is liable for the bill to be honest.

Yes I think the situation could have been handled better. I agree with the others that it was OTT to blank the YO in the pub. I can't imagine he thinks particularly highly of you now.
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Anyway, seems you've calmed down now. I hope tomorrow brings a brighter day for you.
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I would think that he perhaps believes the horse is actually owned by your Mum? Who paid for the horse? I expect he believes that your Mother bought the horse; therefore of course he would go to your Mother, being the adult, to ask permission to use the horse.

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We pay everything split down the middle - the joke runs that one has the front end, one gets the arse end.
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I do hope he doesn't think like that, as I would like to think I am more mature than her, as proved by this and other things she has done in the past. I am often told I am old beyond my years (hope I don't look it although I think I've aged a bit in the past 12 hours!)

I have calmed down now and recognise that some of the things I did and said were rude and uncalled for. Apologies will be made in due course.

I am still upset that my mum lied, although I shouldn't expect any better of her. It also still hurts to see the awful picture in the paper, though that is perhaps my pride stinging more than anything else.

Off to bed now to sleep on it and up early to see if her leg is okay. Let's hope it is or I might spark off another big ranting debate tomorrow
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(-tongue firmly in cheek-)
 
Sounds like a bit of a communcation break down, maybe if anything simliar happens in the future, a quick phone call or txt to the other party stops the fuss.
I would be a bit annoyed with your mum for not letting you know she changed her mind, but accidents do unfortunatly happen. You will feel better once you have calmed down and spoken to your mum(calmly) about keeping each other informed better. Good luck.
 
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I do understand where you're all coming from, however... my mother's name isn't on the contract, only mine. Does that justify my position a little?
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Why is it that you aren't the one speaking to him then?! Sorry, but I don't think the YO has done anything wrong here.
 
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I think this was the straw that broke the camel's back - seeing my beautiful horse being snuggled up to by some chav tart I don't even know. It was front page and everyone has seen it

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Gosh, I don't know about the arguement with your mum but if this is how you think I'm not surprised you are falling out with people. I'm sure this girl is very annoying but, please, sounds as if she is only following orders from her boss and clearly she likes horses or she wouldn't be 'snuggled up' to one in the photo.

I really don't think either the YO or the 'chav tart' as you describe her have done anything wrong and I do think you are being both snobbish and over reacting.

However, this business with your mum is more serious - I'm sorry she lied to you, I can't imagine why she did it but I do know that it is very hurtful when our parents betray us like this. the best thing you can do is to just try to bear up until you are finacially solvent enough to buy Beauty from your mum completely and perhaps make sure that you speak directly to the YO yourself about things rather than going through your mum in future as she clearly can't be trusted.
 
Seems all a bit pointless as the bottom line seems to be your relationship troubles with your mum. YO doesn't appear to have done anything wrong but a bit unfair of your mother not to keep you in touch with what was happening. Wouldn't worry about the chav girl being photographed with your horse - just make sure it is clear that its you that decides what happens to your horse and not your mother for anything like that in future
 
If you pay for half of the horse each, then you are both entitled to make decisions about the horse. When you leave uni and can afford to pay for the whole horse, that is when you are entitled to get cross if things aren't done the way you like. If you accept that your mother pays for half the horse, then she is entitled to make a decision about him.

It was unfair of her to agree one thing and then change her mind. However, it is not the end of the world. You sound slightly as though you are jealous that your horse is in print with someone other than you. If this is the case, you will quickly get over it. I really can't see any other reason why you would have been bothered about it.

And the injury could have come at any time - could have been absolutely nothing to do with your horse having left and then come back to the field again. So there is no way that you can hold your YO responsible.

My advice would be:
1. Apologise to yard owner and say that you were upset as you had not been told that your horse was being used. Don't use the word "sorry, but" in the conversation as it will not come across as a proper apology.
2. Speak to your mother and agree that in future if anyone else is to handle the horse without either of you present, then you BOTH need to agree in advance unless it is an emergency such as injury etc
3. Stop even thinking about it. I am sure there are plenty more things to worry about in your life, so forget about your horse becoming a page 3 superstar!
 
Im not being funny but you need to grow up and get over yourself.

You are very lucky to have your own horse there are many out there that would die to be in your posistion.

If i was you i would have given your yard owner a key anyway just incase something happened to your horse.

It sounds to me that it wasn't a bad cut so why you would need a vet is beyond me.
 
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